Desson Thomson

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For 1,717 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 48% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 50% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 2.9 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Desson Thomson's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 60
Highest review score: 100 Under the Sand
Lowest review score: 0 Isn't She Great
Score distribution:
1717 movie reviews
    • 59 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Even Thompson, the one you look forward to watching, is disappointing.
    • 78 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    The plot becomes so overextended, as Reeves and Hopper wage their endless public transportation battle, even the hardest Die-Harders will consider leaping off way before the final stop.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Flagging energy isn't the only issue here; Ford has become enslaved in his own cliches.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Winter Passing is one dull, extended encounter session among hackneyed characters -- although Deschanel gets the most points for almost imitating a human.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Strikes an unsatisfying balance between serious romantic texture and outright farce.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Sentinel is a medium-dumb thriller that starts out with momentary promise but gets progressively sillier.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Tries -- and fails -- to evoke that whoa-did-this-really-happen edge.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    The trouble with Goal!, which -- horror of horrors -- is the first of a trilogy, is that it's neither a persuasive story nor a satisfying display of soccer.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Director and co-writer James Marsh clearly thinks he has made a grim and telling satire about fundamentalist hypocrisy. But he and co-writer Milo Addica display such contempt for their characters and religious conviction in general, they reduce everything to one-note banality.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Nobody likes a fixed fight, except the backroom boys making the deal. Which is why The Break-Up may have its share of laughs, but isn't much fun.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Aiming to blur the distinctions between truth and illusion, it simply blurs its own effectiveness by relying on predictable and not particularly convincing mystery-thriller formula.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Ultimately, Brothers is a flashy, stylistic show of emptiness, intended to protest emptiness. But that's clear almost from the outset.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Just a few more tweaks and Crossover could have been something special -- a truly terrible movie to savor for the ages. But nooo, this street ball movie -- has to settle for middle-of-the-road badness.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    The movie, a frenetic, explosive experience full of car crashes and gun battles, is original and exhilarating. But more often, it's so overwhelming, it'll make you want to watch "Die Hard With a Vengeance" for peace and quiet.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    The film amounts to a harsh and perpetual assault on viewers' sensibilities -- not only because of its violence but because of its overall bleakness.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Unaccompanied Minors, a sort of junior league version of "The Breakfast Club," never achieves the universal appeal of John Hughes's 1985 film about youth and authority.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    We find ourselves wondering about the real story, not this version.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Throughout, Garner retains a permanent grimace, as if persuasive acting can be achieved by contorting cheek muscles and pouting lips. It's not just depressing to watch; it's tiring. We want to tell her to relax -- for our own relief.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Though Philip Haas's digitally shot film has the firsthand immediacy of such nonfictional docs as "Iraq in Fragments" and "Gunner Palace," its dramatic template feels disappointingly secondhand.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Unfortunately, the film, written and directed by Sue Kramer, starts with a distinctly uncomfortable moral baseline: How exactly is any audience supposed to identify with a character whose relationship with her brother borders on the incestuous?
    • 61 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    It's not often you find a movie as exciting and awful as Rumble in the Bronx. But the sole aim of this so-bad-it's-funny action picture is to introduce Jackie Chan to American audiences. In that narrow sense, it's completely successful.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    For horror fans who appreciate a bit of craft with their second-rate experiences -- Paul Haslinger's fear-mongering score is terrific for what it's worth -- this might merit a future late-night rental.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    The trouble is, this is Hartley all over again. What seemed cutting edge and sharp in the 1990s -- the smart-alecky references to obscure filmmakers (Werner Herzog, Andrei Konchalovsky), the self-mocking tone in the actors' voices, the overall sense that this movie is subverting itself -- feels rehashed and old.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Only fitfully amusing. More often, it feels like a mediocre attempt to reprise the central elements of the infinitely funnier "Napoleon Dynamite."
    • 63 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    There's so little authenticity between them, it destroys the story's most crucial element: the love between father and daughter. And finding the gold becomes our only reason to watch.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    The movie spares no effort to reach out to the crudest, youngest audiences it can.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    This movie is a particular disappointment. Although The Seeker is in Walden's tradition of positive storytelling, John Hodge's script is guilty of downright goofy utterances on occasion.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Makes the mistake of including too sweeping a scope in too small a movie and with too few resources.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    The more the movie progresses, the more you realize how much Seinfeld's voice sounds like a droning bee -- the kind you want to swat away.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Unfortunately, "Youth" becomes so lost in its own conceptual, convoluted vortex, it becomes virtually incomprehensible. Coppola proves that even the best of our film artists can lose sight of what this medium is all about: entertaining, enlightening and including its audience.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Its main purpose -- and no, you are not experiencing ocular breakdown -- is spiritual.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Even by its own standards, the movie becomes increasingly macabre and ludicrous as Anne's machinations get the better of her, and everyone, including the audience, is left feeling shattered, shaken and vaguely unclean for having participated in all this.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Andre Benjamin, Woody Harrelson, Maura Tierney and David Koechner -- all talented -- seem amazingly zombie-like here. And Jackie Earle Haley, as a stoner fan of the Tropics, is more disconcerting than funny.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Rather like the faltering way Dennis runs the race, Pegg the performer insists that we keep watching, ever hopeful for a decent gag. And we spend most of our time thinking back to movies that better showcased his talents, such as "Shaun of the Dead" and "Hot Fuzz."
    • 48 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    21
    The story may be based on real events, but most of it feels patently false.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    All the movie's treacheries, deceptions and story twists are marred by our lack of innocence. We see the big picture way before the characters do, and that pushes us right out of the movie and back into our seats -- the last place we want to be.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    A movie that jumps between two worlds can be a powerful experience, as any fan of "The Wizard of Oz," "Back to the Future" or "The Terminator" can tell you. But this phoned-in epic is simply a celebration of the inauthentic.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    What's Eating Gilbert Grape is a tad too precious. One of those movies that wants to address life's quaint wackinesses, it's full of characters who are quirky, lonely, bizarre or retarded. There's something intensely earnest about the project. But there's something equally manufactured, starting with the casting of Johnny Depp and Juliette Lewis.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Some of it is funny -- particularly the physical comedy. Most of it is not.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Even in his poorest work (i.e., this movie), director Jarmusch retains an appealing sense of experimentation. He fills his movies with those clumsy, unhurried moments between people. But in Night on Earth, with five vignettes to get through, he's forced to create faster, more sketchlike pieces. He's just not up to the task. Nor do performers Winona Ryder, Isaach De Bankole, Roberto Benigni and others pick up the improvisational ball.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    Paul Hogan has an easy plan: Simply be Mick Crocodile Dundee and the rest will follow. The rest is Crocodile Dundee II, and it doesn't follow so much as drag itself along like an alligator on dry land.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    If it wasn't for some exciting roundball action, Shaquille O'Neal's hulking-dunking presence and a wonderfully guttural performance from coach Nick Nolte, you'd slither off the bench asleep.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    This movie, set in the '60s and starring Cher, Winona Ryder and Bob Hoskins, doesn't come of age so much as die of it. It's awash in mediocrity, waterlogged with innocuousness and redeemed only occasionally by sweet-faced Ryder.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    There is so much violence, as gangs kill gangs, or gangs kill cops, or the predator kills all of them, that it's hard to watch without the brain succumbing to self-protective numbness.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    A Sidney Lumet movie is loose. It's a big vehicle, loaded with the usual artistic statement. But Running on Empty is coasting downhill fast.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 40 Desson Thomson
    If your teenage sons are looking for heroes, send them to Toy Soldiers. Even if they're not, send them anyway. They'll probably enjoy watching a judge being thrown out of a helicopter. Too bad the judge didn't take the script with him. Most reasoning adults will probably reject this far-fetched clash between American preppies and Colombian terrorists.

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