For 615 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 56% higher than the average critic
  • 1% same as the average critic
  • 43% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 8.8 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Glenn Garvin's Scores

Average review score: 59
Highest review score: 100 Arrested Development: Season 1
Lowest review score: 0 Unan1mous: Season 1
Score distribution:
615 tv reviews
    • 42 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    CBS' crummiest imitation of CSI yet.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    The Real Housewives Of Miami is even more egregiously fake than the average reality show, so much so that the producers haven't even bothered to remove bloopers in which cast members forget what day it's supposed to be.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Pointless, charmless and bound to be viewerless after the first half-hour or so, The Philanthropist recalls such epochal television bombs as Manimal (a scientist who could turn into a crime-fighting dolphin) or It's About Time (astronauts break the time barrier and frolick happily with cavemen) in its conceptual imbecility.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    As for the lack of laughs, you're just going to have to take my word for it, unless you want to risk serious brain damage.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Allen Gregory is not funny--not even a little bit--and it is not remotely entertaining.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Tr[ies] to distract you from [its] essential awfulness by manipulating the daylights out of you.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    A giant bore.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    To the extent this sounds interesting, it isn't: Half the dialogue seems to have been written for barking dogs, the other half for mewling kittens, and the cast performs accordingly.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Think Gray's Anatomy with unpretty people; then think of something else to watch.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Why anybody is paying the writers and cast of Surviving Suburbia for what is essentially an amateur-hour production is just one more of those eternal television mysteries.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Ben and Kate is sometimes shrill, sometimes belligerent and sometimes (well, a lot of times) merely stupid. It is never funny.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Yet another doomed and dreadful attempt to bring improv comedy to television.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Funny and talented, she [Rachel Bilson] tries painfully hard to make the show work and occasionally comes close to overcoming some of the worst writing since Gutenberg invented movable type.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    A hollow imitation of a sitcom.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    The WB is lying when it boasts that Pepper Dennis signifies a new television life form, the one-hour comedy. Boring, yes; witless, definitely; trashy, oh my God yes. Comedy? Dream on, guys.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    A purported sitcom, it draws no laughs... but does manage the impressive achievement of making Stockard Channing and Henry Winkler, playing Gorham's parents, thoroughly unlikable.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    The network thinks this is razor's-edge television because the characters turn to address the audience during cut-ins. But all the bellowing is straight from The Honeymooners, the jokes from Mandingo and the dialogue... from about sixth grade.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Stripped of the novelty and the jiggle factor--these Angels are fully equipped with functioning underwear--the remake is reduced to its essential self, which is a comic book for the slow-witted.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    An exercise in moronity.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    The Beast is singularly unimaginative, a collection of set-pieces barely bound together by a narrative thread, substituting attitude for substance and coyness for coherence.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    No show in the history of television has more relentlessly defamed the male gender as ABC's Man Up!, an alleged sitcom that debuts Tuesday and with any luck will be dead and buried, along with its producers, by Wednesday.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    With the debut of Julia Louis-Dreyfus' show tonight, [Seinfeld] has now spawned five relentlessly unfunny and compulsively unwatchable sitcoms.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Vulgarian avarice, unfortunately, is one of the high points of Shedding For The Wedding. Far more disconcerting is the number of couples who say they want to lose weight because sex between fat people is--well, let's spare the details and just say "yucky."
    • 60 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    It’s an insidious whitewash of a convicted killer and an infamous smear of his victim. It’s a shame on all involved.... The closest thing to fairness in Phil Spector is the blow-you-away performance by Al Pacino in the title role.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Liz & Dick alternates between imbecile fatuity (particularly in its device of intercutting scenes of a black-clad Taylor and Burton musing on their relationship like characters who've wandered in from an East German experimental film) and stupefying literalness.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    It's a wretched mess and arguably an offense against human intelligence.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Silly, hackneyed and suffering from a lethal overdose of Hollywood political smugness, it's the biggest lawyer joke of all.
    • 80 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Better Things is a faithful female-themed re-creation of Louis C.K.'s other shows: witless and angry, mistaking contempt for satire, self-important in its clueless disregard for plot, characterization or other niceties of the performing arts.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    The tedium and unoriginality of this new ABC sitcom, the latest entry in the vastly overworked motherhood-as-martyrdom genre, has to be seen to be believed, though my strong and sincere suggestion is that you just take my word for it.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    It is uniquely stupid, profoundly stupid, an ecstatic nirvana of stupidity, a stupidity that defies all previous boundaries of time and space.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    This show just isn't funny. At all. Ever. Under any circumstances.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Kelley's compulsive fascination with erratic eroticism turns everything in Swingtown into hypersexualized sleaze.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Kolchak's ridiculously precious writing is not the only thing that rings false about Night Stalker.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 10 Glenn Garvin
    Partners is witless, predictable and much closer to creepy than funny.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    Makes a solid bid to win the Most Unpleasant Reality Show of All Time award.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    I'll give the show credit; it did make me think what I would ask if granted three wishes. Interestingly, all three involved the flesh of Amy Grant being devoured by rabid weasels.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    I'm paying a bounty of $5 per vicious blow administered to the heads of any NBC executive involved in any way with Knight Rider, which cost me an hour of my life and 50 IQ points that I'll never get back.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    Give it credit for consistency: a bad concept, badly written for bad actors.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    This truly hideous sitcom offers a postmodernist take on the 1960s comedy That Girl, in which Marlo Thomas starred as an aspiring actress afflicted with insufferable cuteness.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    Staleness, however, ranks as a virtue in Sit Down, Shut Up, for the show's token stabs at topicality are truly appalling.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    Oprah's Big Give is no mere appallingly bad television show but a refutation of human decency itself.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    With tediously unfunny scripts and a listless cast that looks as if it can barely wait for the director to shout "Cut!" so it can head en masse to the unemployment office, Last Man Standing is some kind of voracious video parasite that sucks out all intellect, sense of purpose or will to live.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    You can practically feel the IQ points leaking out your ears as you watch.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    Monstrously misconceived and incompetently executed, powered by a high-octane blend of arrogance and contempt, The Newsroom is an epochal failure, a program destined for television's all-time What Were They Thinking? list. Not since NASA's first Vanguard rocket blew up on its launch pad in 1957 will Americans have seen anything crash and burn on television with such hellish spectacularity.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    Elvis Lives! creates a black hole of sheer awfulness that threatens to suck in the entire universe and spit it back out as wayward atoms of desiccated goat feces.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    An abysmally dumb plot peopled with some of the most irritating characters in the history of television.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    A crass generation-gap sitcom with the wit if not the intelligence of an elementary-school flatulence contest.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 0 Glenn Garvin
    Smutty at its best, downright creepy at its worst, this dreadful attempt to mock the coming-of-age genre could well be the first TV show to get an entire day of the week canceled.

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