Joe Morgenstern
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For 1,921 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 41% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 57% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 0.6 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Joe Morgenstern's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 59
Highest review score: 100 There Will Be Blood
Lowest review score: 0 Killer Joe
Score distribution:
1,921 movie reviews
    • 40 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    After missing the film on the small screen the first time around, I recently watched it on video, and can only conclude that my screen wasn't small enough.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 30 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    In a truly terrible action adventure called The Tuxedo, a high-tech monkey suit turns Jackie Chan into an all-powerful cyborg, and will turn you into a boredborg.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 53 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    A limited movie that can't animate its subject amid all the tricks and glitz. De-Lovely is devoid of life.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 39 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Disney's National Treasure is supposed to be family-friendly, a PG-rated action adventure free of hard violence and bad language. That's admirable, to be sure, but with a friend like this a family doesn't need sleeping pills.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 48 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    By the end I could have used a Bulleit to the mouth.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    It's not a good sign when a movie is called The Break-Up and you can't wait for the couple to split so they'll get some relief from one another, and give the audience some relief from them.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 37 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    A gothic thriller called Cold Creek Manor extrudes an 80-minute idea -- I may be overgenerous here -- into 118 minutes that feel like an eternity.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 55 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    This sad excuse for family entertainment tries to enshrine a classic while defacing it.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    This time he (Martin) goes through the motions.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Sometime around what I guessed to be the one-hour mark in The Five-Year Engagement, I checked my watch and honestly thought the battery had given out. Five years doesn't begin to tell the interminable tale.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Relevance can't rescue this would-be epic from the swamps of inertia, absurdity and sentimentality.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 50 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Instead of biting wit, though, the movie settles for sketch humor, standard-brand raunch and toothless slapstick that trivializes everything it touches.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    A sudsless soap opera with human misery as a backdrop for romantic banality.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 41 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Ride Along, set in Atlanta, gives shoddiness a bad name.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Extraordinary Measures requires extraordinary tolerance for bathos, bombast and plain old unpleasantness.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Gets to be dislikable in its glib feelgoodness. The movie's many excellent actors do too much acting with too little conviction in scenes that rush through perfunctory setups to deliver pat payoffs.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 39 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Do not attempt to see this film, derived loosely from the videogame of the same name, unless you're prepared for wobbly writing, lead-footed direction and acting that must have been boosted by nitrous-oxide injectors, plus a starring performance that could have used a boost and didn't get one.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Most of the prime goofiness is given over to Vassili and Konig sharpshooting at each other while the battle rages. The movie's a red elephant.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 47 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    You could make a case for this as a feature-film version of the FCC's fairness doctrine, but it feels more like a blandness doctrine, a pulling and hauling of the tone-deaf script, which is credited to Matthew Michael Carnahan, to the point of perfect vacuousness.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Calling Joe Carnahan's movie heartless implies that this auteur of affectless anarchy might have meant to invest it with detectable human feelings, and failed. Better to call it heart-free.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 66 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Only Le Carre fans with tin ears and clouded eyes will fail to note the film's sour tone, crude performances and drab look.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 61 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    As juxtapositions go, regressed Goth rock star and Holocaust could hardly be more bizarre, and bizarre can be good when it's done deftly. In this case, however, it's done ponderously and sententiously.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Sorry excuse for political satire.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Horns is uncertain in tone — most of its attempts at humor fall flat — and amateurish at best.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Everything that was modest, soundly grounded and therefore horrifying about the 1971 rodentarama that starred Bruce Davison is now insistent, Grand-Guignol-intense and therefore shrug-offable when it isn't downright awful.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 48 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Adam Sandler's 50 First Dates isn't just slovenly and smarmy but creepy.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 50 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    Might have qualified as dumb fun if they hadn't left out the fun.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 52 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    How do I count the ways this movie goes wrong?
    • 36 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    I wish I'd brought a pair of peas to the screening. Then I could have taken in the glorious scenery without the dumb dialogue, which is delivered in a jangle of accents that makes a mockery of ethnicity.
    • Wall Street Journal
    • 59 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Morgenstern
    J. Edgar, with Leonardo DiCaprio in the title role, is at war with itself, and everyone loses...Mr. Eastwood's ponderous direction, a clumsy script by Dustin Lance Black and ghastly slatherings of old-age makeup all conspire to put the story at an emotional and historical distance. It's a partially animated waxworks.

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