Joe Neumaier, New York Daily News
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For 899 reviews, this critic has graded:
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25% higher than the average critic
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3% same as the average critic
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72% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 10.8 points lower than other critics.
(0-100 point scale)
Joe Neumaier's Scores
- Movies
| Average review score: | 48 |
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| Highest review score: |
Critic Score
100
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| Lowest review score: |
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0
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Score distribution:
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Positive: 158 out of 899
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Mixed: 542 out of 899
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Negative: 199 out of 899
899
movie reviews
- By critic score
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Joe Neumaier 30
Such a lazy action-drama underachiever, it seems unfair to target stars Jamie Foxx and Gerard Butler for bringing their C game. -
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Joe Neumaier 30
Brothers tries to delve into how war can tear families apart, but only succeeds in showing how miscasting and melodrama obscure good intentions. -
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Joe Neumaier 30
There's an art to making a good spoof, but good luck finding it in Dance Flick, not only because the movie goes for easy toilet humor, but because it often relies on it to stay afloat. -
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Joe Neumaier 30
If Marmaduke achieves anything, it's that it makes this past spring's "Furry Vengeance" look like a masterpiece by comparison. -
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Joe Neumaier 30
This empty, immature romantic comedy ultimately feels as if it's filled with all the hot air that separates New York and San Francisco, yet still manages to be a suffocating bore. -
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Joe Neumaier 30
Less the opulent retelling she (Taymor) intended and more like a high-minded midnight movie, filled with Ricky's-style costumes, black swans, sprites that flit across the screen and a cave filled with boiling beakers.- Posted Dec 10, 2010
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Joe Neumaier 30
This pseudo-punkster hybrid of "Heathers" and "Thelma & Louise" loses its way almost immediately, veering from wannabe-shocking social indictment to stultifyingly obvious yawner.- Posted Jan 31, 2013
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Joe Neumaier 20
This sock-it-to-'em souffle falls very quickly, unless watching Travolta trying on another faux-hip look is considered fun. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Peter Jackson siphoned out all the soulfulness that made the author's combination thriller/afterlife fantasy a best-seller. In its place is a gumball-colored potboiler that's more squalid than truly mournful. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
A cringe-inducing, self-consciously kooky indie comedy that's best enjoyed for its taste of Rip Torn. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The movie soon turns into only a production-designed run-and-chase game, and our curiosity about what happened to Earth and the crew is teased and teased again until the movie’s big letdown of a reveal. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Von Trier ("Breaking the Waves," "Dogville") has no barriers, which absolutely can be a good thing. Here, though, his uninhibited nature is an omen of the pretentious butchery to come. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Since Bullock coproduced this masochistic venture, it seems she buys into the idea that fluffer-nut ditziness is what she does best. Except it isn't. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The cozy sentimentality in The Time Traveler's Wife is the only thing that grounds it. Mostly it's just featherheaded. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Tis embalmed drama is a ghost from the '80s, a decade that regularly produced surprise-free, caramelized biopics. The airless Amelia is missing practically everything. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Where on the evolutionary scale of wacky-dudes-learn-to-grow-up movies does Role Models fall? Certainly less evolved than "Meatballs," but head and hairy knuckles above "Daddy Day Care" or "The Benchwarmers." -
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Joe Neumaier 20
It takes a really bad stupid comedy to make you appreciate well-done stupid comedies. And boy is Miss March a stupid comedy. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
What this heavy-handed film mainly has to endure is a clunky story structure and an ending that wasn't original when it was seen four decades ago on "The Twilight Zone." -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Stein's schlumpy presence is disarming, though his know-it-all nature is at odds with his free-speech posing. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
An atrocious, idiotic 88 minutes of anti-entertainment. To borrow word-shtick from the guru Pitka, it's AWFUL as in, "Anyone Watching Feels, Um, Loser-ish." -
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Joe Neumaier 20
At 67, maestro Argento's taste still runs toward bloody entrails and eye-gougings, but Asia's sexy sour-lemon smile is underused in his movies. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
So that's three snickers, not counting the Bush quote, 'cause including that one ain't fair, man. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
And then there is the most annoying animated sidekick in a long time: a bulb-headed, trying-to-be-cute glow creature called Kilowatt (Kristen Chenoweth), who sings an ear-piercing, high-pitched note when it's scared, which is often. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Another preachy, overacted message film that owes its out-of-time structure to "21 Grams" and "Babel," except writer-director Charles Oliver uses the idea of restorative justice. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Jamie Bell gives a watchable performance in this self-conscious, coming-of-age drama, though the film's overall effect is best described as David Lynch lite. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Adds to the sad realization that this once-vibrant and witty actor (Cage) is completely controlled now by his inner teenager. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Well-intentioned but as earnest as a college freshman discovering campus politics. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
See, everyone complains about humans in movies but no one does anything about it, so it fell to Eagle Eye to make everything laughably, ridiculously fake. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Problem is, this movie is all surface - to quote one character, it has hidden shallows. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Willing as Campbell is to Shatner-ize himself, his movie will appeal only to true believers. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Only natural spitfire Spacek, as the pickup-driving mom of the land, feels fresh. There's even a mouthy kid Garity is "taking care of" - guess whose son he is? -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Like a worst-case-scenario, indie-movie cliché, Wendy and Lucy throws every bone it can at the screen. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
If there are Nazis fighting other Nazis in a movie and it's still boring, something's gone wrong. Valkyrie has a coterie of problems, and represents a whole new front in Tom Cruise's public relations war, but first and foremost there's the tedium. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Unfortunately, the whole movie seems constructed just to get the singer/actress into a knock-down catfight, shoehorning one of show business's sexiest entertainers into a scorned-woman role. And even then, the pay-off feels cheap. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The movie doesn't try for "Airplane!" or even "Scary Movie"-type ribbing, but its adherence to the genre isn't quite pure, either. Despite McCormack's good-natured efforts, this is "MADtv"-quality satire. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
"Wolverine" is silly and typical, not in spite of but because it bonds an undeveloped family feud onto the main character's renegade story.- Posted May 1, 2013
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Joe Neumaier 20
During all of the film’s oh-so-long 97 minutes, Year One, barely earns a snicker. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
This lumbering, ha-ha-look-what-we-remade action-comedy is a high-concept disaster. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Flashbacks show samurai shenanigans, but it's all cluttered and rambling. Watch "True Blood," "Let the Right One In" or "Twilight" instead. Or wait for "Thirst" or "New Moon" or "Daybreakers" or ... -
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Joe Neumaier 20
As ineffectual police work and broken feet stack up, the silliness gets out of hand. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Early scenes set up the tragedy, but the majority of Oliver Hirschbiegel's movie is set in a TV studio where the two eventually face each other, and the tension, unfortunately, quickly becomes stagey. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Motherhood's litany of complaints and trite comedy-drama comes off as thin, and targeted, as a flyer for The Children's Place. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
These actors know how to liven up a room, yet here they're forced to perform in Miller's Theater for the Overwritten. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
It's also suffocatingly stagy, especially when the husband's new love (Kristen Bell) and a violent thief (Justin Long) show up. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Director John Polson's elliptical storytelling style quickly becomes an irritant. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Frozen is good for five minutes of "What would you do if?" games. Then it's just stiff as a board. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Would like to think of itself as an extension of its lead character -- gangly, a bit uncouth, but ultimately sweet. Unfortunately, it's more like the best friend in a movie like this -- irritating, unfunny and something that hangs around longer than it should. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
I Love You Phillip Morris not only blasts gay stereotypes back decades, it could actually make people wish for a third "Ace Ventura" movie. Both of those are an accomplishment, though neither is a compliment.- Posted Dec 6, 2010
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Joe Neumaier 20
Robert Luketic's bland action comedy focuses on the uninteresting relationship between its two bland main characters, and that's the deadliest thing in sight. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
An epic example of muddled storytelling, chintzy excitement and scatter-brained execution. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
To call MacGruber"a total bomb is a bit much, but this comedy-action flick sure feels like it was put together with gum, shoelaces and a couple of sticky Twizzlers. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Kick-Ass - based on a graphic novel - thinks it's so brave and bold. But it's more like the title character, a dweeb who just thinks he's tough. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The Losers is simply a lot of low blows, telegraphed each and every time. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The Tracey Fragments is a grating stunt that plays like a film-school project, cutting a bland story into a million tiny irritating pieces. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
This is one of those films in which almost every element is done in such an embarrassingly amateurish way, you want to put it out of its misery. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
A documentary with too much dead time between the arduous tasks at hand, never grabs a viewer because -- sad to say -- it's too dull. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Throughout, Davidson's intentions are honest but become lost in a haze of overly familiar story beats. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Writer-director Sebastian Gutierrez seems to think his characters are oh-so-edgy, and maybe they would be -- if it were 1982. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The overlapping stories, the emotional disconnect, the heavy-handed symbolism -- no, it's not a movie from the makers of "Babel," its a mumbling, stammering copycat drama from Swedish director Lukas Moodysson. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
John Peaslee's Screenwriting 101-style script has merely left everyone floating on their own. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Only viewers wondering if James Van Der Beek has finally outgrown "Dawson's Creek" will be at all satisfied by this dreadful police procedural that contains good history lessons and bad TV-cop-show drama. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The connection they share is clear; the reason we're invited to sit in is foggy at best. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The title of The Misfortunates really applies to any audiences unlucky enough to sit through it. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
This fawning appreciation wears thin, despite the good-natured clowning of Alabama dentist/would-be actor George Hardy, who's like a poor man's Bruce Campbell (our apologies to Bruce Campbell). -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Unfortunately, its positive attributes are thrown out of balance by its abundant negatives - including chintzy effects, lumbering storytelling and an overstylized, earnest incompetence that evokes "Speed Racer." -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The Last Exorcism trods on previously stomped ground and has almost no good jump-outta-your-seat moments. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Has raw action and urgent performances, but loses power due to an amateur approach.- Posted Jul 1, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
The father is the only one who can leave the house to go to his factory job, and that seems like a paradise for viewers trapped watching this clinically shot claptrap. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Likely to draw a range of responses. Many will be transported by its gorgeous construction and breathless emotion. Others will find it patently ridiculous. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
The James Bond parodies and genre riffs feel at least 20 years past their prime, and most will fly right over the heads of audience members 7 and under -
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Joe Neumaier 20
This dour, hyperactive family film is joyless, overly busy and starchy. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Most of the acting is amateurish at best, and the tone is vintage "Afterschool Special." But it does aim to be family-friendly, and at least it succeeds there. -
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Joe Neumaier 20
Johnson is convincing as a swaggering, jokey Lennon, but the photos of young John, Paul and George that end the movie ultimately have more punch than this bubblegummy montage. -
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- Posted Nov 12, 2010
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Joe Neumaier 20
It doesn't help that Eastwood's laconic style is as torpid as it was in such misfires as "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil" and "Changeling."- Posted Oct 21, 2010
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Joe Neumaier 20
Half-assed, halfhearted attempt to copy the Farrellys' out-there style is missing both their jackassical riffs and their heart.- Posted Oct 22, 2010
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Joe Neumaier 20
This tonal mishmash cripples The Dilemma almost immediately, though there are many other speed bumps, including Vaughn's irritating, fast-talking prattle.- Posted Jan 13, 2011
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- Posted Jan 28, 2011
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- Posted Feb 11, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
I Am Number Four, with its gangly title, seems like a dimwitted cousin to those hipper properties - a Superman-come-lately tale of puppy love, extraordinary powers and puberty that's duller than a chalkboard and less powerful than an extraneous Jonas brother.- Posted Feb 18, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
At least "Witch" offers Perlman's easy, early-hominid charm, and a semi-suspenseful rickety-bridge scene.- Posted Jan 7, 2011
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- Posted Apr 8, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
Director James Keach's movie is so annoyingly dipsy-doodle that TV veteran Bilson, trying hard to look haunted and angsty, is boxed in.- Posted Feb 4, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
There's a reason potboiler paperbacks don't make good movies - there's too much outlandish plot, even for Hollywood.- Posted Mar 18, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
The amazingly awful dramatic thriller Red Riding Hood could, with tweaks, be enjoyably bad in a "Plan 9 From Outer Space" kind of way. Instead, it's M. Night Shyamalan-style bad, which means despite all the unintentional snickers, you feel trapped.- Posted Mar 11, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
A children's comedy about talking animals that feels as if it were written by children or, perhaps, by talking animals.- Posted Jul 8, 2011
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Joe Neumaier 20
The Sitter is not only an atrocious shout-out to bad '80s comedies, it's also the kind of movie Jonah Hill should look at as a crass blast from his past.- Posted Dec 9, 2011
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