For 1,348 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 27% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 70% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 12.4 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Joe Neumaier's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 49
Highest review score: 100 Rise of the Planet of the Apes
Lowest review score: 0 Battle: Los Angeles
Score distribution:
1348 movie reviews
    • 82 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    The result is a dull, high-minded soap opera.
    • 80 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Like a worst-case-scenario, indie-movie cliché, Wendy and Lucy throws every bone it can at the screen.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    The father is the only one who can leave the house to go to his factory job, and that seems like a paradise for viewers trapped watching this clinically shot claptrap.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    What the movie needs more than anything else is a fast-forward button.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    A documentary with too much dead time between the arduous tasks at hand, never grabs a viewer because -- sad to say -- it's too dull.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    The film is an exasperating bore.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Polanski views things so mischievously that the naughtiness is neutered long before sniveling Thomas is tied to a pole. He’s a captive not only to Vanda, but also to all the dull, reductive mind games.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Neighbors stakes its claim in suburban-property cliches. Given the dull, stale results, maybe the end of the world was a better fit.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Director Kyle Patrick Alvarez’s film underserves its cast of up-and-comers (Thomas Mann, Ezra Miller, Tye Sheridan), allows the usually solid actor Michael Angarano to go astray with a scenery-chewing role and buries Crudup in fretting and sanctity. Worse, the experiment’s inherent drama is exacted with a tin ear and a cheesy style.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Johnson is convincing as a swaggering, jokey Lennon, but the photos of young John, Paul and George that end the movie ultimately have more punch than this bubblegummy montage.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    It would be easy to say that the final minutes of this mixed-up thriller make everything before it meaningless, but that would indicate the odd conclusion has meaning, too.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Alas, this learned woman of letters - her expertise became the work of Dostoyevsky, whose major novels Geier nicknames "the five elephants" - is ill served by a trudging approach and dry-as-dust, procedural style.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Kick-Ass - based on a graphic novel - thinks it's so brave and bold. But it's more like the title character, a dweeb who just thinks he's tough.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 0 Joe Neumaier
    Splice is an unholy mess because it fuses together the worst parts of every bad medical-monster thriller, and then boldly cranks up the ridiculous.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    I Love You Phillip Morris not only blasts gay stereotypes back decades, it could actually make people wish for a third "Ace Ventura" movie. Both of those are an accomplishment, though neither is a compliment.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Likely to draw a range of responses. Many will be transported by its gorgeous construction and breathless emotion. Others will find it patently ridiculous.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Laudable as its world-building is, the film drags not just in its interminable middle hour, but also during the redundant monster-on-mechawarrior smackdowns.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Corey Stoll is the only reason to sit through this muddled Jersey-set drama.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 0 Joe Neumaier
    Danish director Lars von Trier makes this tale of one woman’s banal sexual adventures into inadvertent comedy. The film makes an analogy between sex and fly-fishing — and fly-fishing comes off as more intriguing.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    There's a reason potboiler paperbacks don't make good movies - there's too much outlandish plot, even for Hollywood.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    The charmless but harmless A Cat in Paris hits theaters yet doesn't enchant.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    The Last Exorcism trods on previously stomped ground and has almost no good jump-outta-your-seat moments.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Sort of “An American Psycho’s European Vacation,” this indie dramatic thriller mixes sex and violence and still winds up dull.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    It is no summer thriller. It’s an anemic actioner that fosters excitement like dead limbs as it lumbers toward a conclusion.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    The end result is like Quentin Tarantino reworking a Charles Bukowski story.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Early scenes set up the tragedy, but the majority of Oliver Hirschbiegel's movie is set in a TV studio where the two eventually face each other, and the tension, unfortunately, quickly becomes stagey.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Jamie Bell gives a watchable performance in this self-conscious, coming-of-age drama, though the film's overall effect is best described as David Lynch lite.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    Director Michel Leclerc's comedy plays like one of those foreign-movie spoofs Jerry and the gang would go to see on a "Seinfeld" episode. Only here, there's no "young girl's journey from Milan to Minsk" - just from madcap to moronic.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    This is what happens when the Norwegians try to make their own "Blair Witch Project": We get three-headed trolls that hate Vitamin D and references to "Deliverance."
    • 28 Metascore
    • 20 Joe Neumaier
    The movie soon turns into only a production-designed run-and-chase game, and our curiosity about what happened to Earth and the crew is teased and teased again until the movie’s big letdown of a reveal.

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