Jordan Hoffman
Select another critic »
For 183 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 53% higher than the average critic
  • 1% same as the average critic
  • 46% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 2 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Jordan Hoffman's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 62
Highest review score: 100 The Wolfpack
Lowest review score: 0 A Haunted House
Score distribution:
  1. Positive: 92 out of 183
  2. Negative: 25 out of 183
183 movie reviews
    • 55 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    Think about that one insufferable guy you knew in school who comments on everything you put on Facebook. Now try and imagine spending an entire movie’s run time with him.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    It’s a play shoehorned into a film. Sometimes that can work – LaBute’s managed it before – but it’s a steep hill to climb, and this one doesn’t quite make it.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    I give the odd, small film Maggie all the points in the world for experimenting with genre-blending and subverting audience expectations, but there’s just too much about it that fails to connect.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    Hunting Elephants has its requisite scenes of planning and setbacks, but it mostly settles for old-people jokes (now I know the Hebrew for Viagra: it’s Viagra) and making Patrick Stewart look like an imbecile.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    All the pieces are in place for a gripping indie horror flick, but this pointless, motivation-free film just goes around in circles.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    The connection that these two are allegedly making must be taken on faith. Little is shown or spoken to sell it.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    In the spaces between the hackneyed dialogue, ham-handed score, and poor acting, Walking With The Enemy eventually wins its sole victory: a desire to look the story up on Wikipedia later that day. That may be a small triumph, but it’s hardly the mark of fine cinema.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 40 Jordan Hoffman
    The specifics of the journey get all the attention, while the fundamental conflicts remain not just unoriginal, but alarmingly nonexistent.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 39 Jordan Hoffman
    Tina Fey is in the film, for heaven’s sake, and I love her to pieces, but by now we know to expect something humdrum when she’s on a movie screen.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 35 Jordan Hoffman
    Hollow, uninteresting and false.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 35 Jordan Hoffman
    The first sixty minutes of Pompeii are awful, bordering on unwatchable... The final forty-five minutes of the movie however are, by sheer force of will, irrefutably entertaining. At least there’s raining death in the form of fireballs smashing up the place.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 30 Jordan Hoffman
    The prolific 76-year-old British creator of character-rich, social dramas steeped in natural realism (usually) has whiffed it and whiffed it hard with this one. It’s not that it’s just “lesser Loach.” It is, in my opinion at least, humiliating.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 30 Jordan Hoffman
    The whole picture is lifeless and without consequence.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 30 Jordan Hoffman
    It’s just boring – and boring in a way that apparently has no endgame.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 30 Jordan Hoffman
    Nymphomaniac Vol. 1 is the worst thing Lars Von Trier has ever associated himself with.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 30 Jordan Hoffman
    Cripplingly lifeless.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 27 Jordan Hoffman
    The Lifeguard is a painfully dull (alleged) drama utterly lacking in originality or self-awareness.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 25 Jordan Hoffman
    “Expendables 3” has fewer nauseating clichés than The Judge.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    Despite a lead performance by the always welcome Julianne Moore it is rudderless in its presentation and outright stupid in its central conceits.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    Fading Gigolo wants to be some sort of sunny tapestry about New York’s social groups, but it’s impossible to see past its absurd premise.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    For a movie with the ostensible mission of spreading the Gospel, it does a poor job of speaking to anyone except the faithful.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    This is television-level moviemaking top to bottom, from its preposterous premise, scenery-chomping performances, idiotic sound cues and force-fed jump-scares. Deliver Us From Evil delivers formula, and in a formulaic fashion.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    The corn in The Identical is as tall as an elephant’s eye – but there’s nothing that says the story of a man torn between his religious upbringing and his desire to be a musician can’t make for a good movie. In fact, considering a little movie called "The Jazz Singer," there’s ample proof that it can be groundbreaking.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    Young kids will find the second, more action-heavy half of the film entertaining, but everyone else will want to crawl into their shell.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    Embarrassing for everyone involved not because of any squeamish subject matter – quite the contrary, seeing retirement-age characters are refreshing – but because the story structure is so fake and so plodding.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    If there was just one extended sequence that crackled with originality you could at least say it has its moments, but, truly, there’s nothing besides repeated use of swear words in lieu of wit.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    You’ve seen this movie before with peppier actors, and not tethered to a visually uninteresting set that looks like a remainder from a 10-year-old episode of CSI.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 20 Jordan Hoffman
    This is the film’s grossest crime. It’s dumb, it’s long, it’s dull, but it isn’t quite bad enough to be camp.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 15 Jordan Hoffman
    Ti West’s pointless new film The Sacrament, an exercise in talking loud and saying nothing, isn’t just bad, it’s infuriating.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 10 Jordan Hoffman
    Does this mean that Sabotage is a rich, morally complex story about the gray zone between good and evil? Hell, no. It just means it is a bungle.

Top Trailers