Kimberley Jones
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For 692 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 39% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 59% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 3.4 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Kimberley Jones' Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 56
Highest review score: 100 The Past
Lowest review score: 0 The Women
Score distribution:
692 movie reviews
    • 44 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    I’m told Bella’s helplessness is true to the spirit of the novels, but so what? It’s almost 2010 – let’s get hip, people.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    How many screenwriters does it take to screw in this dim bulb? Five – no joke – and another one credited with “story by.”
    • 43 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    He is meant to be brooding, I think, but Tatum’s vague features read more “meathead” than anguished young lover. He has to carry the film, but he’s the least interesting thing going on here.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    Even though She’s Out of My League ends exactly where you think it will, it does so without ever having actually gone anywhere at all.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    The film goes by in a wash of uninspired action and unmemorable comedy.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    It's an intermittently amusing parable about an outcast's ascension, as performed by a pack of digitally manipulated dogs. Next.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    The 3-D angle is the only one I can identify to justify Alpha and Omega not going straight to DVD.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    Maybe taking a cue from his namesake dish, that much-maligned Scottish pudding concoction made with sheep innards and root vegetables, Haggis presents a mishmash of genres in this redo of Fred Cavayé's 2008 French film "Pour Elle."
    • 52 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    No one would mistake the Benzini Bros. Circus for the greatest show on earth – the Depression-era traveling troupe is a junker compared to the gold-standard Ringling Bros. – but still, a film has to try pretty hard to render lions and tigers and trapeze artists so uniformly underwhelming.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    The film restages the greatest hits of the show's many musical numbers, to greatly diminished effect, with lackluster choreography and all the narrative appeal stripped away.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    But most damningly, Shut Up Little Man! fails to convey what was so hypnotic about the original tapes, and Bate's decision to re-enact the transcripts with actors seems weirdly contrary to the spirit of the thing.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    The Greek myths, of course, will endure. The same cannot be said for Singh's silly, self-serious, instantly forgettable, and inaptly named Immortals.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    In Movie 43's better-suited afterlife in the home-entertainment market, those sort of quandaries can be hashed out between bong rips and bags of Cheetos.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    The leads project a sunny patina of wholesomeness and share marvelous tans, but beyond that, it’s a shrugging love match.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    Back to that question of medium: Scrubbed of the few, ill-fitting four-letter words that earned it an R, Language of a Broken Heart might have made a passable Hallmark or Lifetime TV movie, cushioned by the TV-movie context. But as a theatrical prospect, it’s a fail.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    I’m not saying there isn’t comic gold to be mined in the topic of cunnilingus and the senior set, but The Big Wedding couldn’t hit pay dirt even if it face-palmed the film first.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    All together, it is a wearying display of defensiveness from a man who – by any barometer, not just his own – is wildly successful.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    The film finds some momentum once the bodies start dropping – but maybe that was only the sweet relief in knowing the end was nigh.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    There’s probably a movie out there that can call a happy, anatomical truce between Viagra-hopped, horizontal-dick jokes and heart-on-the-sleeve love stuff, but this ain’t that.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    Unimaginatively filmed and of a misbegotten construction, Tammy goes all in with its namesake character (played by McCarthy), hanging the entire movie around a person who is immediately and irreversibly established as being thoughtless, unperceptive, destructive, and uneducated.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 30 Kimberley Jones
    Because “all in” – to me, at least – suggests a certain standard of enthusiasm, of emphaticness, and what this latest Step Up movie indifferently chunks out falls far short of that standard.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Everybody figured producer Joel Silver and Willis couldn't lose and guess what? They all rolled craps.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    The blandness of The Wedding Planner burlap-sacks their appeal in an altogether dowdy outing for two stars who deserve much snazzier threads.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    A succession of shrill overacting jobs.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Isn't much more than a self-indulgent picture about the feeble delirium of a lovesick girl -- lightweight stuff that labors to seem terribly important.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    The collective charisma of Robert De Niro, Eddie Murphy, and Rene Russo is the only reason to slap down eight bucks for this limp action/comedy, but then, it's difficult not to want to avert your eyes out of embarrassment for the trio.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    A paint-by-numbers romantic comedy, but without the heart or laughs to make it work.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Irritating throughout, Love Me if You Dare turns positively appalling in its last half hour, with the inevitable final showdown producing an image that continues to curdle my stomach days later.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    It isn't all the actors' faults, of course. You can't, ahem, turn straw into gold, and straw – dull, brittle, lousy to taste – is entirely what director Mark Rosman and first-time screenwriter Leigh Dunlap deliver.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    And then there's the overacting. And then there's the hamminess of the script. And then there's
    • 54 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    These days, Allen's pictures are more like snuff films, in which the viewer must suffer both gifted actors committing screen hara-kiri and a once-brilliant filmmaker soldiering on with his long, bullheaded decline.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Screenwriter Dean Georgaris gets a hell of a pass here – the story is canon, and, in terms of emotional wallop, does all the heavy lifting for him – but he still manages to gunk up the works with dialogue that is dull-witted at best and outright howling at its worst.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    The Celestine Prophecy's biggest stumbling block (and there are many to choose from) is that the film's dramatic arc hinges on John's awakening to the prophecy. But spiritual epiphany is tough to convey onscreen.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    If you're gonna hire one of the funniest American comedians working today – Zach Galifianakis – and shove him to the side of the frame, then frankly, you can take what happens in Vegas, keep it in Vegas, and keep the rest of the us out of it.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Overlong, overplotted, and pocked with improbabilities.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    New in Town might have better played on the less demanding stage of, say, a Lifetime made-for-TV movie.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Love Happens? It depends on your definition of “love.” And “happens.” There isn’t much of either in this predictable, putzy drama.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Indisputably awful comedy.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Aggressively unfunny and unromantic, Valentine’s Day’s chief concern appears to have been the corralling of its cast of a thousand stars; it seems far less attention was paid to what to do with that cast once assembled.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    In practice, and played as farce, the characters are one-dimensional cutouts kept at a dogged remove. Their miseries are a bore – maybe to Allen, too, who abruptly ends the film, after so much inaction, when it finally catches some dramatic traction.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Check the credits: That move is ripped straight from producer Michael Bay's playbook.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    These are boys and girls on their very best behavior, which doesn't sound like any prom you or I remember.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    There are kernels here of a thoughtful and provocative picture, but they never pop – or POP!, for that matter.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    As the film's central focal point, Simpson (who also co-wrote the script) is an awful zero – you could hardly imagine a more uncharismatic lead – and his embarrassing swings at big emotion in the climax prove the final blow to a film already hobbled by mawkishness.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    What goes most wrong is the casting. Every facet of Faris' performance feels off.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    They have some fun playacting at class warriors on the lam – and Seyfriend, it must be said, rocks a killer bob – but it's all just big-budget dress-up in a futurescape that reeks of phoniness.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Bill Condon (Dreamgirls, Chicago, Gods and Monsters) takes over the directing reins for these final two parts; his most noteworthy contribution to the series so far is a terrifyingly staged birth scene that should turn the teen fan base off of sex altogether … which is precisely what this whole dumb, punishing series has been gunning for from the start.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Mostly, New Year's Eve is appalling stuff, a poorly constructed, sentimental sham. Auld lang suck.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    There is running, hiding, fighting, shooting, bleeding, biting, slicing, dicing, and damnably little entertainment value in any of it.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    I have never doodled during a movie before in my life, but holy hell, Parker's two-hour running time takes a lifetime. Plenty of time for mental doodling, too.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    What a clunker.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Branagh might as well have opened a can and dumped it on a plate, the ridges of a factory-line production still perfectly hatched on a gelatinous cylinder of crud.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 20 Kimberley Jones
    Not just narratively crude but aesthetically ugly, Men, Women & Children’s framing occasionally cuts characters off at the forehead, in effect lobotomizing them. I couldn’t think of a better metaphor for this brainless splotch of self-important scaremongering.
    • 10 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    I was consistently aghast at how unabashedly alpha-male, heartless, and chauvinistic this film is.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Instantly forgettable.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    The script's tone veers chaotically -- and ambitiously -- at once aiming for a Noel Coward kind of elegant sparring, then for the lightly raunchy, rompy absurdism of "What's New, Pussycat?"
    • 63 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    It's all infuriatingly simplistic, and the performances help matters little. Quinn and McTeer are wholly uncompelling.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    The only actors who walk away unscathed are Kattan -- the best thing in a very bad movie -- and former cover girl Shaw.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Indeed, the largely computer-generated Jack acts the pants off his co-stars, which can and should be taken with a whole trough full of salt.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Takes the giant leap from your run-of-the-mill mediocrity into an alternative universe of awfulness.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Wretched. And while the dirtiest, low-rottenest part of me wouldn’t mind watching the institution of Ben/Jen get reamed, the heft of the blame should be shouldered by Hollywood vet Martin Brest, who wrote an incoherent, incompetent script and further mangled it with his direction.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Though the three leads are all likable performers, their lunkheaded characters are as thinly drawn as their cartoon counterparts, and the supporting cast is littered with one racial stereotype after another.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    The politest way to assess Spike Lee's latest polemic is to call it too ambitious. "An unholy mess" might come closer to the truth.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Little Black Book isn't your run-of-the-mill romantic comedy – it's much worse – and, rather disgustingly, the devils on earth it unmasks are all female and vindictive.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Everything else here – from the gross caricatures to the so-called comic mayhem – is sour to taste.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    No film that requires a woman to jump in water and dogpaddle toward a man has the "sisterhood's" best interests at heart.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Some things are best left undiscovered.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Vacant and pointless.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Novelty alone does not a good idea make, and in the case of Gnomeo and Juliet, it's rather a disturbing, even fetishy one.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Appallingly bad stuff.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    It's hard to decide what rankles most: what an astonishing monument to Shadyac's self-absorption I Am is, or how flat-out bad – incompetent, even – the filmmaking is.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Flaccid, endlessly irksome coming-of-age drama.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    About as humorless – and joyless – as they come.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    In his English-language debut, Wirkola dabbles in everything but commits to nothing, making for an unmemorable brew best left untasted.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    I’m in Love With a Church Girl is not unambitious: It crams into its two hours terminal illness, money laundering, a DEA sting, clubbing, a prolonged coma, and lots of Bible study. But the action – punishingly turgid, spread-it-on-a-cracker cheesy – feels inauthentic, ginned up only to promote the film’s come-to-Jesus messaging, and to call the acting amateurish does a disservice to hard-working amateurs everywhere.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 11 Kimberley Jones
    Already hobbled by an overwrought story that turns positively Hallmark-Movie-preposterous in its third act, journeyman director Michael Hoffman (Soapdish, The Last Station) can’t conceive of a single memorable set-piece or rouse his actors into action. By the time Marsden’s character has very polite sex with the love of his life with his pants still on, I was done.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    The damn thing is boring. Dull as dirt. Despite the many fine actors involved, View From the Top is a third-class production through and through and, frankly, I'd rather be pelted in the head with stale, salty peanuts than sit through it again.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    Astonishingly dull. The leads have zero chemistry, the supporting actors are even worse, and the script is a lifeless, draggy thing.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    It's cheap and it's lowdown, and to those responsible for this exercise in devolution: Honestly, I'm not sure I want to know someone like you.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    With all the wrong Stealing Harvard has done, it at least bestows one gift upon its audience: the gift of forgettableness.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    It’s a lot like hearing the play-by-play account of a heated game of bridge. Only not half as gripping.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    Never aims higher than the urinal.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    Jovovich, who's shown sensitivity in her dramatic work, looks spectacularly bored as she power-kicks her way through one bloody pile-up after another. That boredom, like the mystery virus at the center of the film, is contagious.
    • 9 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    Hey, guys, when you repurpose a disco hit to poke fun at gay men, not only do you look like assholes, you look like assholes who rip their jokes off of YouTube.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    It's not particularly fun, or funny, for starters.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    I'd be hard-pressed to name another recent film so deeply noxious, soul-sick, and unfunny.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    How do movies this bad still get made?
    • 40 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    The Virginity Hit is repugnant.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    Hall Pass has half the right idea: Scratch out "Hall," and just … pass.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    I'm not gonna sugarcoat this: Movies don't have to be this bad.
    • 9 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    What does startle is how tiresome it all is.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 0 Kimberley Jones
    By eliminating the winking, broad strokes of the filmmakers' more successful spoofs, they've made a film that is not only dumb, but dull. It's like watching a snuff film, only it's the audience who's dying inside.

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