For 2,481 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 46% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 52% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 5.6 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Lou Lumenick's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 56
Highest review score: 100 Walk the Line
Lowest review score: 0 Halloween: Resurrection
Score distribution:
2481 movie reviews
    • 51 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Hyperactive.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Painfully unfunny spoof.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    THE mesmerizingly awful The Kid & I is a historic first: a comedy about the making of a vanity production that is ITSELF a vanity production.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A pathetic stoner comedy.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Painfully sincere. But it wrings almost no laughs or tears from this seemingly idiot-proof premise.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Another ridiculous anti-American screed by the minimalist Danish director Lars von Trier, who has never set foot in this country.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Ineptly directed by Simon West, the scare-free When a Stranger Calls is the worst of the seminal horror movies from the late '70s and early '80s that have been getting the remake treatment lately.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Kirschner's excruciatingly earnest coming-of-age comedy, is about as fresh as year-old matzoh and plays like the unholy spawn of "Brighton Beach Memoirs" and "Fiddler on the Roof."
    • 43 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    With Roth at the helm of a script attributed to Price, there is minimal suspense, audience involvement or coherent social commentary.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    William H. Macy lends a little class as a snail, but Smith nails it in the closing-credit outtakes: "Don't expect Robin Williams-caliber work."
    • 43 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Who let this dog out?
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Watchable in a train-wreck kind of way, but you'll probably want to take a shower afterwards.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Most of the interviews are as brief as they are obvious, and it doesn't help that none of those interviewees, including clergymen who served as technical advisers, are identified.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Scary Movie 4 concludes by satirizing Cruise's couch-jumping orgy on "Oprah." Funny, but nowhere near as hilarious as the real thing.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A great-looking but stupefyingly incoherent supernatural thriller adapted from a popular video game that ransacks the entire catalog of horror film tropes for more than two mind-numbing hours.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    There are bachelor and bachelorette parties, as well as much misbehavior, in this glossy and unconvincing little flick, receiving a vanity booking on the way to video.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Arguably as effective as Ambien at inducing sleep, but possible side effects include uncontrollable laughter.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Sometimes there's a fine line between a labor of love and a vanity project, and The Lost City, Andy Garcia's heartfelt - but hackneyed and interminable - love letter to his native Cuba, repeatedly crosses it.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Looks great for a no-budget indie, but not a single moment rings true in this sluggish vanity project, which is sorely in need of Viagra.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Slow-witted and occasionally unintentionally hilarious.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Sexual and toilet humor plumb new depths in Keenen Ivory Wayans' Little Man, which will stink up theaters like several gross of dirty diapers.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Despite this seemingly surefire premise and cast of veteran comedians - there's even a cameo by Liza Minnelli as a masturbation coach - The OH in Ohio just lies there, without a single laugh.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A charmless, unscary, fatuous and largely incoherent fairy tale.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    I wouldn't have thought it was possible to make a prison picture as utterly boring as Jailbait.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Pulse bears more than a slight resemblance to a 1994 American horror called "Ghost in the Machine." They didn't screen that stinker in advance for critics, either.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A repugnant little indie black comedy, poorly acted in hideous-looking digital video, guaranteed to send audiences fleeing for the nearest shower.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A strained, ultra-predictable and headache-inducing mockumentary.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The sort of lowbrow sports comedy best enjoyed on a 50-inch screen with a six-pack, a bucket of wings and a fast-forward button.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    An excellent case for euthanizing the entire talking-animals genre.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Relentlessly grim.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Rarely has a documentary been so pleased with itself - with so little justification.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    One of the year's worst movies.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A deadly dull, by-the-numbers rendition of the Nativity story.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The latest catastrophe from the Weinstein Co.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    An ugly, unfunny, headache-inducing fairy-tale spoof.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Suspenselessly directed by Robby Henson, Thr3e commits the eighth deadly sin - boredom.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Thirty years after "Annie Hall," the beloved actress is scraping below the bottom of the barrel with this desperately unfunny farce, in which she mugs and pratfalls in the worst performance of her entire career.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    It's nicely photographed but slow-moving, dull and utterly predictable.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    While there are some scattered laughs, the flimsy and nonsensical script - combined with the sledgehammer direction by Brian Robbins, make the similarly themed "Big Momma's House" look like Noel Coward.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Rock appears to have edited I Think I Love My Wife with a roulette wheel.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Have you ever seen a movie without a single believable moment? Perfect Stranger, a convoluted and altogether risible thriller with Halle Berry and Bruce Willis, manages this difficult feat.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Despite solid contributions by vets such as Michael Lerner and Daniel Stern, Caleo isn't able to sell The Last Time - not the affair and especially not the ludicrous twist ending.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    As much as we like Alec as an actor, it's hard to imagine that any amount of editing and reshooting under his supervision could salvage his complete ineptitude as a director.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The Spanish Inquisition was better summed up in an eight-minute musical number by Mel Brooks than in the entirety of Goya's Ghosts, an across-the-board disaster from one of my favorite directors, Milos Forman.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Well, it smells, all right, but authentic isn't the word I'd use for this maudlin male weepie, a compendium of the worst clichés of sports and journalism movies.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    In the fourth and by far the worst screen version of "The Invasion of the Body Snatchers," Nicole Kidman's character struggles to stay awake - as will the audience.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Mostly unfunny, extremely silly pingpong comedy.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A very belated and very silly follow-up to "Death Wish."
    • 30 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Featuring eyeball-rolling performances by Vivica A. Fox, Patti LaBelle, Clifton Davis and the singularly named Leon, Cover would be a candidate for the year's most unintentionally funny movie so far - if it weren't also the most homophobic.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    You can see better stuff on TV any night of the week.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    I've had root canals that were more enjoyable than Margot at the Wedding, Noah Baumbach's hugely pretentious, ugly and annoying follow-up to "The Squid and the Whale."
    • 39 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A protracted piece of schmaltz, P.S. I Love You looks like a hand-me-down from Sandra Bullock and Drew Barrymore.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Excruciatingly lame and laughless romantic comedy.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A totally ridiculous and incoherent sci-fi adventure.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    I was kind of rough on "Apocalypto," which in retrospect seems like a minor classic compared to 10,000 BC.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Draggy and incoherent.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    An overwrought and patently offensive anti- abortion drama from the director of the accomplished "House of Sand and Fog."
    • 45 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    One of my critical brethren opined that this sort of dumbing-down and low comedy may be the only way to sell the public a movie about the Iraq war. If that's true, God help us.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Quickly devolves into a nonprescription alternative to Ambien.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Someone describes his writing as "snarky, bitter, witless." The last part pretty well sums up this movie.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A total disaster.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A slow-moving, ridiculous police thriller that would have been shipped straight to the remainder bin at Blockbuster if it starred anyone else.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Fanning gives a sensitive and fairly impressive performance. But like her over-the-top movie family, Hounddog is still trailer trash of the worst kind.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A good cast can't save The Lodger, the utterly wrongheaded fourth movie version of a 1910 novel inspired by Jack the Ripper.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Exceedingly lame.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The Caller qualifies as something of a Holocaust movie, with flashbacks to World War II France. Guess who the two boys we see grow up to be?
    • 45 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The stars look bored out of their minds when the fourth episode of the franchise stalls between racing sequences.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Dreamworks Animation's clunky and wildly unimaginative Monsters vs. Aliens really doesn't have a clue what to do with the [3-D] technique.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    An exceedingly silly historical fantasy.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Seems to go on for several days and nights, though in fact it lasts just 105 minutes. I checked my watch. A lot.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Just to give you a taste of the movie's sophisticated idea of wit, it also makes fun of gay men.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The cowardly producers have banished the grit and darkness of Parker’s original.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    After a slightly promising start, this great-looking but ultimately deeply confusing and unscary sci-fi/horror opus turns into a quite boring rehash of M. Night Shyamalan's post-"Signs" films.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A witless homage to "Shampoo" and "American Gigolo" that's brain-dead on arrival.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Barely watchable, despite the presence of such pros as Michael McKean and Jane Lynch.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    When New York, I Love You was previewed in Toronto a year ago, there were two additional segments that have since been cut. So you'll have to wait for the DVD to see just how bad Scarlett Johansson's directing debut is.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Neither a concert film nor a documentary but a ghoulish “event” offered just in time for Halloween, This is It is sadly -- and reprehensively, if you ask me -- the movie equivalent to the National Enquirer’s infamous post-mortem shot of Elvis Presley.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A shrill farce that strains credibility even by the standards of black comedy.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Produced with the best of intentions by a California church and directed without distinction by first-timer Brian Baugh, To Save a Life would be bland and boring even as a half-hour after-school special.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Charmless and underdeveloped knockoff of "The Santa Clause."
    • 24 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Cisneros is an appealing actor, but he and Falling Awake get buried under a welter of clichés.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Dear John is the sort of movie that gives tearjerkers a bad name.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A cringeworthy, unfunny example of a culture-clash romantic comedy.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Repo Men is a rare film where Toronto plays itself. It's also the first I've ever seen where a typewriter is used as a lethal weapon.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Quite a slog, with most of the acting strictly amateurish save the veteran Ed Lauter as a fish and game inspector.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Never rises much above yawn-worthy.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Excruciatingly unfunny.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    This is a terminally whimsical vanity project that would probably have been a chore to sit through even in its original intended format, a 20-minute stage monologue.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Apprently novice filmmaker Angela Ismailos' definition of a Great Director is one who's willing to sit or walk with her while she lobs innocuous questions and gives herself lots of awed close-up reaction shots.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A maudlin and unintentionally hilarious romantic weepie.
    • New York Post
    • 51 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The stars' utter failure to create sparks is only one of the problems with this Labor Day weekend dump job.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Milks the very real problem of "organ tourism" for all the melodrama and car chases it's worth.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A sloppy vanity project, this rambling and toothless Hollywood black comedy stars veteran filmmaker Henry Jaglom's girlfriend, Tanna Frederick.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A surprisingly unengaging and charmless fantasy from a director whose previous films ("Across the Universe," "Titus," "Frida") were, despite their other issues, never boring.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The only thing remotely scary about Monsters is that Magnolia is releasing this boring scare-, suspense- and gore-free horror movie (which reportedly cost less than $100,000) on Halloween weekend.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Despite much effort, neither Johnson nor director George Tillman Jr. ("Notorious") can make this preposterous tale, live up to its title.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The sort of misfire that Hollywood has long buried in January.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A labored romantic farce whose only asset is Carlos Leon, best known as the father of Madonna's daughter Lourdes.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A tediously unfunny comedy.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Aside from a relatively brief appearance by Joan Cusack's avatar as the kidnapped mother, there are no involving characters or situations.

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