For 2,294 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 46% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 52% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 3.6 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Lou Lumenick's Scores

  • Movies
Average review score: 56
Highest review score: 100 Insomnia
Lowest review score: 0 Filth and Wisdom
Score distribution:
2,294 movie reviews
    • 30 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    So consistently silly and overwrought that it flirts with the elusive so-bad-it's-entertaining category.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Ineptly directed by Raja Gosnell -- the genius behind the "Scooby-Doo" features, "Big Momma's House," and "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" -- this cheesy-looking flick has lousy animation, worse special effects and the most headache-inducing, blurry 3-D since "Clash of the Titans."
    • 30 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    A mildly funny, stereotype-stuffed comedy.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Seriously flawed - and choppily edited in the worst Harvey Scissorhands style - but there are enough good moments to anticipate a second film from writer-director Katrina Holden Bronson, whose parents were Charles Bronson and Jill Ireland.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Probably would have yielded a more interesting documentary than this sugary feature.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    The material in this spy spoof is, pardon the pun, awfully frayed.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    Zookeeper barely avoids a zero-star rating because of James.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    An impressive supporting cast can't save this painfully unfunny, ham-fisted mockumentary poking fun at reality TV shows.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Endlessly lame.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    A soggy cannoli of a domestic dramedy.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Excruciatingly maudlin.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    When you awake, it may all seem like a bad dream - but why is your wallet missing $11? Scary.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    Epic waste of celluloid.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 75 Lou Lumenick
    I haven't laughed harder at anything this year, but I would have a hard time recommending this gender-bending gut-buster to anyone who doesn't have a high threshold for crude sexual humor and stereotypes.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 63 Lou Lumenick
    A refreshingly unpretentious little thriller.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Rates an "E" for effort -- and a "B" for boring.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Excruciatingly unfunny.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Watchable even when what's going on makes no sense whatsoever.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A root canal seems a more pleasurable way to pass two hours than this interminable vanity knockoff of "Traffic" about troubled Angelenos.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    This mess was directed with no skill whatsoever by Jesse Dylan, whose father, Bob, once urged us all to get stoned.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Calling Boys and Girls the year's worst movie makes it sound more entertaining than it actually is.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    It’s often hard to figure out who’s winning, much less care about it. One thing is certain: Nobody is going to be demanding a rematch.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A repugnant little indie black comedy, poorly acted in hideous-looking digital video, guaranteed to send audiences fleeing for the nearest shower.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Desperately unfunny.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Excruciatingly lame and laughless romantic comedy.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The pretentious and unrelievedly glum first feature from music-video and advertising director Nenad Cicin-Sain, The Time Being looks sharp, but it’s about as dramatically satisfying as watching paint dry.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    An appallingly unfunny and unromantic romantic comedy.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    As for Gooding, he's sadly gone to the dogs -- Snow Dogs has got to be his most humiliating role since "Lightning Jack."
    • 29 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    This is less a documentary than a wholly uncritical celebration.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    No "Schindler's List," to put it mildly.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    You Again could be taught at film schools as an example of how not to make a movie. And how not to humiliate veteran actors.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Androgynous Clea DuVall's performance shines through a foggily told, vaguely acted coming-of-age tale.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 75 Lou Lumenick
    Penn makes us take the leap required by Kristine Johnson and Jessie Nelson's screenplay -- you end up deeply caring about Sam and Lucy.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Extremely cool-looking in the manner of "Sin City,'' but clumsily staged, slackly acted and mind-numbingly dull, Israeli director Guy Moshe's English-language fantasy is set in a future when guns, and apparently coherent conversations, have been outlawed.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Even an appearance by Alec Baldwin as Moretz's eventual - if highly unlikely - savior isn't enough to keep Hick from leaving a bad taste.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Love and Honor may be politically clueless, but Hemsworth and the student journalist he hooks up with (fellow Aussie Teresa Palmer of “Warm Bodies’’) do make an undeniably attractive couple.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The latter is played by Parker Posey, who looks baffled throughout. As well she should.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 63 Lou Lumenick
    A messy -- but uproarious, timely and provocative -- farce.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    If I Were You has more than its share of laughs, but director Joan Carr-Wiggin needed to cut half an hour to make this fly without interest flagging. She had the exact same problem with her last movie, “A Previous Engagement.’’
    • 28 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    A shallow, stilted romantic thriller.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Sitcomish, stereotypical and sporadically funny romantic comedy.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    May be predictable and silly, but it's never dull.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A labored romantic farce whose only asset is Carlos Leon, best known as the father of Madonna's daughter Lourdes.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    “I’d rather gouge my eyes out with hot spoons!’’ De Niro exclaims at one point. I’m not sure exactly what he was talking about, but I’d like to think it referred to the prospect of being forced to watch The Big Wedding.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    An ugly, unfunny, headache-inducing fairy-tale spoof.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Slow-moving, yawn-inducing remake.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    So feeble it fails even as train-wreck exploitation. I’d be unkind, but not entirely inaccurate, to label Coppola’s sophomoric, er, sophomore effort as a director an offer you can refuse.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    This is the sort of comedy that requires you not only to suspend disbelief, but your sanity as well.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Actually, Bruce, what stinks is the script — which is woefully lacking the kind of one-liners and memorable bad guys that helped make working-class hero McClane so iconic he’s still around after 25 years. Even the action sequences are pretty much by the numbers this time.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Fitfully amusing.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Crudely animated, badly dubbed, incomprehensible, boring -- and headache-inducing -- attempt to wring a few more yen and dollars out of a thoroughly spent franchise.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The "Prinze" of terrible movies is back - in what might charitably be called "Rear Window" for morons.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Strands a good cast in a sea of stereotypes and clichés.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Most of this movie is beyond lame. It almost makes "A Cinderella Story" -- the ever-mugging Duff's surprise hit of last summer -- look like a real movie by comparison.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    The sort of movie that seems to exist for no good reason except to keep the studio's pipeline filled with filmed product.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 63 Lou Lumenick
    Actually more entertaining than its 1994 predecessor.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Garfield is a downright cat-astrophe.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A vulgar, grating alleged "family" comedy.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    A movie so pathetically lame that hopefully even Spears most ardent young fans will give this stinker a big thumbs down.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    You could do far worse in the current marketplace.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Might have been more successful if Darabont and his pal had attempted a Preston Sturges-like farce. Instead, it's played totally without any kind of edge - a fantasy that makes "The Lord of the Rings" look realistic by comparison.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Catwoman is pretty well summed up by Hedare: “This is a disaster. It’s a total bloody disaster.”
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Watchable in a train-wreck kind of way, but you'll probably want to take a shower afterwards.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A schmaltz-laden soap opera from Saskatchewan.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A total disaster.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    De Niro mostly looks miserable and very tired (a document glimpsed on-screen hilariously claims his character was born in 1970) and prattles on endlessly about forgetting the past.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Ineptly directed by Simon West, the scare-free When a Stranger Calls is the worst of the seminal horror movies from the late '70s and early '80s that have been getting the remake treatment lately.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Pulse bears more than a slight resemblance to a 1994 American horror called "Ghost in the Machine." They didn't screen that stinker in advance for critics, either.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    While there are some scattered laughs, the flimsy and nonsensical script - combined with the sledgehammer direction by Brian Robbins, make the similarly themed "Big Momma's House" look like Noel Coward.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 63 Lou Lumenick
    A game and often quite funny attempt with an expert cast.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    A brightly colored but terminally dull cartoon.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Co-star Christina Applegate, who's much more at home in this down and dirty milieu, wipes the floor (in one scene, literally, in a ludicrous cat fight) with the erstwhile Oscar winner.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A baffling mixed platter of gritty realism and magic realism with a hard-to-swallow premise.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    The acting is, at best, serviceable; the sound track is too often unintelligible; the direction is often over the top; and the script relies heavily on stereotypes.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    So utterly devoid of suspense, energy or credibility it should have been shipped straight to the remainder bin at Blockbuster.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Sexual and toilet humor plumb new depths in Keenen Ivory Wayans' Little Man, which will stink up theaters like several gross of dirty diapers.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Thirty years after "Annie Hall," the beloved actress is scraping below the bottom of the barrel with this desperately unfunny farce, in which she mugs and pratfalls in the worst performance of her entire career.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    The film plays out pretty much exactly as you would expect - which won't bother some people one iota.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    This is the sort of low-grade dreck that usually goes straight to video -- with a lousy script, inept direction, pathetic acting, poorly dubbed dialogue and murky cinematography, complete with visible boom mikes.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Amy Sedaris, channeling her inner Frances McDormand as a hyper admissions coach, gets most of the laughs.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A collection of product plugs masquerading as a movie en route to home video.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    A witless and vulgar romantic comedy wrapped inside a mock documentary.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The latest, and let's hope the last, in the raft of uninspired, quickie Bush-bashing documentaries churned out by producer Robert Greenwald
    • 26 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Thoroughly inept in just about every aspect.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    It's loaded with -- scenery-chewing melodrama, cornball pidgin dialogue and syrupy music.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Hokey, inept tear-jerker.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    Sandler's latest ode to projectile vomiting, passing gas, gay jokes and physical insults to the groin is basically a feeble cross between "The Revenge of the Nerds" and "The Bad News Bears."
    • 25 Metascore
    • 63 Lou Lumenick
    Tasteless but sporadically uproarious black comedy.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Repackage clichés and stereotypes with attractive young performers in a simple-minded script that panders to the teen audience.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Even by the extremely low standards of the genre, When in Rome gets failing marks for chemistry, credibility and even coherence.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    "I am surrounded by oceans of boredom," the campy Abraham complains at one point. It's a sentiment audiences are bound to share.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The often difficult-to-follow plot is sort of "Traffic" for nitwits.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Vanity productions don't come much worse than One Third, an amateurish, dialogue-free curiosity courtesy of Yongman Kim, the founder of the Greenwich Village institution Kim's Video.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Ultra-glossy weepie turns out to be something of a guilty pleasure.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Brain-dead film.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Cisneros is an appealing actor, but he and Falling Awake get buried under a welter of clichés.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Should you get Carter? Sure - but make it the Michael Caine classic Warner Bros. is releasing on video next week.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Sporadically funny, dumbed-down version.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Exceedingly lame.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A relentlessly dull film that's shot on eyeball-gougingly ugly digital video.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Do your kids a favor - and take them to see something more worthwhile than the relentlessly vulgar and stupid See Spot Run.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Boasts special effects that are really spectacular - too bad it lacks flesh-and-blood characters.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    There's no excuse for a thriller as lame, leaden and unthrilling as Godsend, which manages to take a potentially interesting subject - human cloning - and use it to put audiences to sleep.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    It really couldn't have been easy for Jason Lee ("Almost Famous") to keep a straight face while saying, "I'm not in this for the money.''
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    William H. Macy lends a little class as a snail, but Smith nails it in the closing-credit outtakes: "Don't expect Robin Williams-caliber work."
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Excruciatingly unfunny.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A vile and laughless follow-up to Schneider's 1999 hit.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    To describe Love, Honor and Obey as a cross between "Duets" and "Snatch" doesn't begin to suggest how desperately unfunny this musical gangster comedy is.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A tediously self-absorbed variation on "The Big Chill" and "The Return of the Secaucus 7."
    • 23 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    It's pretty sad if you're a comic and Al Pacino is the funniest thing in your movie.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A schmaltzy, smutty and mean-spirited quasi-satire.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Not especially scary or funny, this lame comedy-thriller wastes a decent cast in a plodding tale.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Has its moments of interest, including two excruciating vocals by Arquette and Caan -- and a George Clinton score that contains a theme eerily similar to that of "American Beauty."
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Pierre is at best competent as the star, director and writer of this good-natured compendium of ghetto movie clichés, which doesn't have an awful lot to offer in the way of laughs, pacing or originality.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    A good cast equipped with cute names is forced to muddle through terminal whimsy in this less-than-magical adaptation of Aimee Bender's adult fairy tale, sluggishly directed by Marilyn Agrelo, who more successfully helmed the delightful documentary "Mad Hot Ballroom."
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Desperately unfunny and unexciting.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Arguably as effective as Ambien at inducing sleep, but possible side effects include uncontrollable laughter.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Rarely does a movie go so thoroughly wrong in so many ways.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Odd and not entirely uninteresting little docudrama.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    It's sad to see Quaid in sloppily directed (by Martin Guigui) dreck like Beneath the Darkness less than a decade after the performance of his career as a closeted married man in "Far From Heaven.''
    • 22 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Suffers from terminal hoof-in-mouth disease.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Painfully stupid.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Elaborate vanity production.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Relentlessly dopey and vulgar.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Mind-blowing and headache-inducing. But the kids loved it.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    A cheerfully dopey snobs vs. slobs teen comedy.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Excruciatingly bad.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A loud, coarse and witless family comedy.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A slow-moving, dirt-dull narrative crammed with clunky expository dialogue and obscure Biblical references.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    As much as we like Alec as an actor, it's hard to imagine that any amount of editing and reshooting under his supervision could salvage his complete ineptitude as a director.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Shallow and blatantly manipulative variation on "Awakenings" in which every plot development is telegraphed.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    An exceedingly dull and stillborn attempt to update the Brothers Grimm.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Antonio Banderas is unintentionally hilarious as Father Matt Gutierrez, a sort of Jesuit James Bond.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Virtually unwatchable and laugh-free.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    This is a cheap-looking lowbrow comedy that likely would have gone straight to home video.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    With awkward acting, plotting and direction, this is no "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner," "Jungle Fever" or "One Potato, Two Potato."
    • 21 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Wavers between extreme silliness and unbearable earnestness.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    No, Bratz, an unwitting and witless critique of American consumerism run amok, does not star Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Like many first films, Boricua's Bond is wildly uneven.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    Even if it weren't three years too late to parody Moore (ineptly played by Kevin Farley), Moore's ridiculous tribute to Cuban health care in "Sicko" is far funnier than anything in this desperately laughless farce from David Zucker ("Scary Movie 3").
    • 20 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Tedious and tawdry.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A witless and vulgar sequel.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    If M. Night Shyamalan sold his soul to the devil for the success of "The Sixth Sense," I think His Satanic Majesty has finally collected in full with The Last Airbender.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 50 Lou Lumenick
    Little more than a series of sketches, tied together by Joe's on-air interrogation by a nasty shock jock played by Dennis Miller.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    An assembly-line high-school comedy that flunks miserably in all three subjects.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    The lamest in the recent run of comedies about uptight white people getting jiggy with it, would also be the most offensive -- if it weren't also the dullest.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    After the monster is subdued, then there's a much less humorous, and more mindlessly violent second half.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Skin-crawlingly awful.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    It's not surprising to learn that the story -- which the press notes assert is loosely based on fact -- has been kicking around Hollywood for 15 years. It's that bad.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The only hint of professionalism comes from Cheech Marin as Cannon's boss, who at times seems to be acting in a different movie.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Produced with the best of intentions by a California church and directed without distinction by first-timer Brian Baugh, To Save a Life would be bland and boring even as a half-hour after-school special.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Amply demonstrates how even a movie with wall-to-wall action can be a crashing bore.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    It's so devoid of joy and energy it makes even "Jason X" - a recent attempt to prolong the rival "Friday the 13th" slasher franchise - look positively Shakesperean by comparison.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A crass, shrill and laughless disaster of a holiday comedy with a desperately mugging Ben Affleck that should be banned under the Geneva Convention.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A painfully sincere indie drama that isn't content to evoke only the misery of 9/11 -- it has to reference TWA Flight 800 for extra grief.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The dreary, direct-to-video quality of the script, acting and cinematography in this latest entry seemed to inspire more yawns than screams, and not a few titters.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A cut-rate ripoff of "Aeon Flux" with Milla Jovovich as a butt-kicking futuristic heroine in a midriff-baring bodysuit, is ultrastupid, ultra-incoherent, ultrasilly - and way, way ultraboring.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    A skin-crawlingly unfunny riff on Woody Allen's "Bananas."
    • 18 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Boring and desperately unfunny.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Even dumber than Perry's "Three to Tango," this latest sitcommy exercise is sporadically funny in spite of itself -- and not quite as dreadful as you would suspect.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    A pathetically unfunny comedy that should have been shipped straight to video, if not recycled as guitar picks.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    If you mashed-up the worst parts of the infamous "Howard the Duck,'' "Gigli,'' "Ishtar'' and every other awful movie I've seen since I started reviewing professionally in 1981, it wouldn't begin to approach the sheer soul-sucking badness of the cringe-inducing Movie 43.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    Misconceived, bloated and incredibly ugly fantasy epic.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Features less than 10 minutes of music in its mercifully brief 83-minute running time.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Stick a fork in Nia Vardalos. I've been to funerals that were a lot more fun than I Hate Valentine's Day, her second alleged romantic comedy in less than a month.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    There is plenty of blame to go around for this laughless mess.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Stars Carmine Famiglietti, Joseph Summa and Gino Cafarelli apparently also wrote Chooch and directed it under a trio of aliases. They shoulda applied to the witness-protection program instead.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A good cast can't save The Lodger, the utterly wrongheaded fourth movie version of a 1910 novel inspired by Jack the Ripper.
    • 17 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Putting it as kindly as possible, this pitiful romantic comedy directed by Scott Marshall (dad Garry did "Pretty Woman'') peaks with its animated opening credits.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Sony dumped this sleazy, inept and worthless piece of torture porn into theaters yesterday.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    You cease to care as they fall back on a catalogue of clichéd shocks, tired camera angles and an ever-mounting gore quotient.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Dennis Rodman isn't half bad as a blond, multiply pierced Interpol agent.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    A low-rent, slow-witted horror flick notable chiefly for its hilariously unsuccessful attempt to pass off Luxembourg City as New York City.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    Sort of "West Side Story" set in 1958 Brooklyn -- minus the music or competent storytelling -- is clearly not dealing from anything close to a full deck.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    The only pro involved in this amateurish labor of love is veteran character actor Arthur Nascarella, cast as Jack's florist father.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    A dumb, by-the-numbers children's movie.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Based on a video game, far exceeds expectations -- in negative ways that inspire thoughts of less than zero stars.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    The latest vanity production by writer-director-star Eric Schaeffer, who still seems to think he's another Woody Allen -- despite a growing body of work that proves otherwise.
    • 14 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    With the abysmal A Little Bit of Heaven, Kate Hudson's possibly unprecedented losing streak remains unbroken: She hasn't made a good movie since Almost Famous, 12 long years ago. Even Nicolas Cage can't say that.
    • 14 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Arguably the most insipid movie released so far this century.
    • 14 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Tacky-looking, incoherent, badly acted and hopelessly directed disaster is easily the dullest adventure film of 2000.
    • 13 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Except for Brolin as an unlikely born-again Jew, nobody fares well under Mulroney's ham-fisted direction.
    • 13 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    So awful it qualifies as cruel and unusual punishment.
    • 13 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    Stinko movies often unwittingly critique themselves -- and the brain-dead romantic comedy Down to You (which Miramax understandably didn't screen in advance for critics) is no exception.
    • 12 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    So unremittingly awful that labeling it a dog probably constitutes cruelty to canines.
    • 11 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    None of this is remotely funny.
    • 10 Metascore
    • 38 Lou Lumenick
    A genuine oddity that's more watchable than it sounds.
    • 9 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Goes from being tediously terrible to downright gigglesome.
    • 9 Metascore
    • 25 Lou Lumenick
    Spectacularly awful.
    • 9 Metascore
    • 12 Lou Lumenick
    A low-end scam by Lions Gate Films -- whose recent "The Wash" was a masterpiece by comparison.
    • 6 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    Certainly the most painfully unfunny of the countless bad movies that have licensed the name of the long-defunct humor magazine.
    • 6 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    It's a totally inept and unfunny parody of the TV show "Cops."
    • 5 Metascore
    • 75 Lou Lumenick
    To say that Vulgar is not for all tastes might be the understatement of the year. For starters, this black comedy has a male rape scene that makes the one in "Deliverance" seem mild by comparison.
    • 1 Metascore
    • 0 Lou Lumenick
    An inept, brutally unfunny collection of sketches.