For 550 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 25% higher than the average critic
  • 4% same as the average critic
  • 71% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 14.7 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Nick Schager's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 45
Highest review score: 100 Days of Heaven
Lowest review score: 0 Vampires Suck
Score distribution:
550 movie reviews
    • 49 Metascore
    • 25 Nick Schager
    For a film about a killing machine who can see at night, it's fittingly ironic that the film itself is, both narratively and visually, a dark, muddled mess.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 25 Nick Schager
    Guy Ritchie may have creatively moved on from his Tarantino-inspired debut, but international crime cinema has not, as again evidenced by Magnus Martens's film.
    • 21 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Romanycheva exudes cunning carnality, yet her wiles are as rote as the rest of this B-grade genre flick, which feigns interest in post-Communist Eastern European power dynamics but favors listlessly staged shoot-outs and heists devoid of emotional, psychological, or sociopolitical substance.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Not a single arresting image is found amid the sci-fi rubble, though unintentional laughs eventually arrive courtesy of a cornball motivational speech by Eckhart's hero.
    • 13 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    As if written by a robot whose frame of reference wasn't human reality but merely fairy-tale romantic comedies, Love, Wedding, Marriage strips genre tropes down to their scrawny, brittle bones.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Despite an A-list roster, the performances are universally one-note, a fact largely attributable to a script overflowing with blunt dialogue and heavy-handed symbolism.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Fans of incessant flashbacks and endless whooshing zooms into close-ups will find much to love about Assassin's Bullet; less satisfied, alas, will be those with a fondness for lucid plotting, compelling intrigue, and credible performances.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Incapable of energizing Mark Poirier's leaden script (based on his own novel), Christopher Neil directs with a mechanical blandness made more tedious still by a score of gentle guitar strumming so aggravatingly benign it might inspire you to partake in one of Wendy's climactic, cathartic primal screams.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Even caped do-gooders couldn't save Supercapitalist, a dramatic dud whose title refers not to some big-business hero but rather to wheelers and dealers living lives of swank suits, fast cars, loose women, plentiful drugs, and goofy corporate-espionage spy games.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Shanghai Calling eventually reveals itself to be just another stale tale about the virtue of morality over ambition.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Between the cast's modern hairstyles and attitude, and the paint-by-numbers set design and period costumes...the action comes across as a prolonged, dreary game of dress-up. That director Danny Mooney shoots his material like a TV show doesn't help.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    A respectable cast and much noisy boisterousness isn't enough to generate a single laugh.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    A multicultural mini–Thelma and Louise but far duller than that description implies, Just Like a Woman peddles feminist empowerment with one-note didacticism.
    • 19 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    A few decent one-liners notwithstanding, the movie comes off as willfully uninspired.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    The real bogeyman is incomprehensible plotting in director Steven C. Miller's Under the Bed, which matches narrative incoherence with one of the most over-the-top portentous scores in horror-cinema history.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Girl Most Likely strands Kristen Wiig in a dreadful, disingenuous city-vs.-suburbs comedy that mercilessly mocks New Jersey before turning around and celebrating its provincial trashiness over the hoity-toity snootiness of Manhattan.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Its tolerant messages remain buried beneath lame pop-culture references, hectic slapstick, fart jokes, and endless Smurf-puns that—Azaria's funny, over-the-top cartoon villainy aside—make one pine for the Smurfpocalypse.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Insidious Chapter 2 picks up where its predecessor left off-- in abject silliness.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Without comments from Akka's Jewish residents or any conflicting voices, the film plays like a propagandistic attempt to reshape historical and contemporary narratives.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Amid much overacting, Kaige addresses the subjectivity and unreliability of images through this-isn't-what-it-looks-like scenarios that would make Jack Tripper groan.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    The film indulges in much wannabe-funny wailing, shrieking, and flopping about by Nénette and Paul, only to then lace its buffoonish material with semi-serious undercurrents.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    It's a techno-thriller of brain-dead proportions.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    A mushy concoction that's not only unfulfilling, it's gag-worthy.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    It's an over-the-top cautionary doc less convincing than the weight-loss ads on Facebook.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Unfortunately, no amount of softcore titillation can compensate for all the cheap special effects and faux-profundity dispensed by this superhero-self-help dud.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Throughout, Helberg's awkward-anxious routine proves insufferable, and it's made no more tolerable by supporting turns from Zachary Quinto, Alfred Molina, and Judith Light, who are given so little to do that their presence in this mess feels downright cruel to both them and us.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    It's the wooden plotting and cornball sentimentality--and, most unpleasant of all, the full-frontal nudity of Jamie Kennedy--that truly make this AVN-themed fairy tale, ahem, hard to swallow
    • 25 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    From a bevy of cheesy jolt scares (alarm clock! barking dog!) to the embarrassing sight of Zellweger and Ian McShane treating this Orphan-style B-movie silliness with grave seriousness, the film proves to be one hokey-horror riot.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    Even with the grungy aesthetics and earnest preaching, Inhale is really nothing but crass topical exploitation, milking this social issue for every salacious drop.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 20 Nick Schager
    It's simply one wearisome '90s crime-cinema cliché after another.

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