Robert Wilonsky

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For 396 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 31% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 67% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 12.4 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Robert Wilonsky's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 50
Highest review score: 100 Down from the Mountain
Lowest review score: 0 Corky Romano
Score distribution:
396 movie reviews
    • 53 Metascore
    • 50 Robert Wilonsky
    The love story, not to mention plot holes large enough to swallow entire platoons, so bogs down the story that whatever tension the Vassili-Konig confrontation creates disappears every time Weisz appears on-screen; she tears apart comrades--and the movie.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 50 Robert Wilonsky
    The real fault with this movie lies less with the clunky screenplay from Himelstein than with the acting, of which there is very little of note.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    A spin-off of a sequel... It doesn't even try to be different, because it assumes the moviegoer wants only the same-ol' and then offers even less.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Whatever goodwill one harbored toward the first Pirates film is quickly dashed by its sneering successor, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, which is less a film than a two-and-a-half-hour trailer for the final installment in this accidental trilogy.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    It tries to be both camp and action film--send-up and kick-ass. But it delivers so little on both fronts.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 20 Robert Wilonsky
    The film has no form or function; at best, it's a 90-minute infomercial.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Hunter's movies never condescended to the audience; they never winked, never pretended to be a mere Playboy party joke. Which is precisely why Down With Love, which strives to be to "Pillow Talk" what "Far From Heaven" was to "All That Heaven Allows," is such a disaster: It winks so hard it lapses right into a coma.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 10 Robert Wilonsky
    It's an exceptionally dreary and overwrought bit of work, every bit as imperious as Katzenberg's "The Prince of Egypt" from 1998.
    • New Times (L.A.)
    • 52 Metascore
    • 50 Robert Wilonsky
    Serendipity already feels archaic, like some dusty relic that's been unearthed from an antique store's attic and polished off for display.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 60 Robert Wilonsky
    This innocuous, frothy fairy tale isn't so off-putting as you might imagine, thanks in large part to Andrews' ageless charm.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 50 Robert Wilonsky
    What's most astonishing is that a film populated by two madmen can grow so wearying and dull; the movie crawls toward its climax, which is so barmy it's almost surreal.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 30 Robert Wilonsky
    Cornier than the cornfields spread out in front of the dilapidated rural Texas manse inhabited by Robert Duvall and Michael Caine, playing grumpy old brothers with mismatched accents.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 30 Robert Wilonsky
    A muddle—not amiably ambling, not affably shaggy, just a mess that gets messier till, at times, the whole thing looks improvised by amateurs more concerned with being clever than something resembling affectionate.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 10 Robert Wilonsky
    A football film made by a man who apparently has seen little of the game outside of movies, and not very good ones at that.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 10 Robert Wilonsky
    There's nothing more enervating than a stupid film with only random, and perhaps accidental, flashes of smarts; the rare prescient moments only serve to highlight how banal and vacant the rest of the movie is, especially when it stoops to conquer the gross-out market bled dry by the Farrelly Brothers and their myriad acolytes.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Before things have even begun we know how they will end; this is pure Hollywood product, slicker than the insides of an oilcan.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 30 Robert Wilonsky
    It's easily the ugliest film Gilliam's ever made, a movie shot with a lens someone forgot to wipe. It's also his loudest: Every scene is amped up to 11, and every line of dialogue is delivered as though it's a cry for help from the bottom of the well.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 50 Robert Wilonsky
    The best you can say of Asylum is that it plays like a topless "Twilight Zone."
    • 51 Metascore
    • 50 Robert Wilonsky
    Uou may choose to read My Date with Drew several different ways -- as endearing or frightening, as bleak or expectant, as the optimistic daydream of the naïve Everyman or the beginning of a problem that could only lead to a restraining order.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 30 Robert Wilonsky
    Obnoxiously dull.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    The screenplay does enough sabotage on its own; the nose, perhaps, is there to give us something to focus on lest our minds wander and wonder just how we chose to kill an hour and 48 minutes giving this crime caper access to our pocketbooks. (Might be good on video, though. Or cable.)
    • 51 Metascore
    • 20 Robert Wilonsky
    Who wants to pay to see a movie so bad the actors and writer-director feel the need to keep reminding us of how bad it is?
    • 51 Metascore
    • 20 Robert Wilonsky
    This ain't no movie. It's a very long, very tedious infomercial for Phantom Menace action figures, on sale now at a Target or Toys "R" Us near you.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Plays like a greatest-hits remix; like "Die Another Day," it's bent on resurrecting a moribund franchise by recalling all the things you used to love about it till you grew into big-boy pants.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 20 Robert Wilonsky
    Singleton's version is cynical and silly--one long set-up to a closing scene that promises, or threatens, a sequel.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 70 Robert Wilonsky
    Perfectly acceptable, deliriously charming...a goofy Bmovie dolled up like a square-jawed A-list blockbuster.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 70 Robert Wilonsky
    For all its kinetic energy, for all its camera tricks, for all its dark humor, there's still something a bit off about these Rules, and it's not really Avary's fault.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 80 Robert Wilonsky
    What Constantine offers is a deceptively thoughtful tale tricked up like an action movie; it's beautiful to look at but even more lovely to ruminate over.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 30 Robert Wilonsky
    You're almost tempted to laugh at Birth by the end, but by then you're too busy cursing it to bother.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 30 Robert Wilonsky
    Should make about $750, which is how much they need to save the farm, but a little less than Disney CEO Michael Eisner needs to save his job.

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