Robert Wilonsky

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For 394 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 31% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 67% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 10.8 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Robert Wilonsky's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 49
Highest review score: 100 About Schmidt
Lowest review score: 0 The New Guy
Score distribution:
394 movie reviews
    • 72 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Hellboy is as much a wreck as "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" or "The Punisher," coming and going in two weeks, and as much a bore as "The Hulk."
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Hunter's movies never condescended to the audience; they never winked, never pretended to be a mere Playboy party joke. Which is precisely why Down With Love, which strives to be to "Pillow Talk" what "Far From Heaven" was to "All That Heaven Allows," is such a disaster: It winks so hard it lapses right into a coma.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Into the Blue drowns before it even surfaces.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    The cumulative effect is less thrilling than it is merely amusing.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    The whole thing seems to meander aimlessly, rarely creating a chill.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Even if there were a great movie here, it would have been undermined by two lead actors who are barely even there, asked to deliver lines they can't handle: Bale, playing the Batman with clipped wings, and Katie Holmes as an assistant district attorney who doesn't have the gravitas to pass as an intern. Come back, Alicia Silverstone; all is forgiven.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    The movie's a bust in myriad ways, especially because almost every scene possesses the oily feel of manipulation and condescension.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Evolution is merely stale, sterile and, worst of all, safe.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Aims to be loud, dumb fun, only it takes itself too seriously to offer anything approaching a good time.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Why would the writers bother with narrative when the story is just something that kills time, and brain cells, between feats and fists of fury?
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    It tries to be both camp and action film--send-up and kick-ass. But it delivers so little on both fronts.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    The only thing The Missing isn't missing is a handful of climaxes, all of them of the anti- variety that leave you believing, then praying the movie's over a good 30 minutes before its actual and inevitable finale.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Plays like a greatest-hits remix; like "Die Another Day," it's bent on resurrecting a moribund franchise by recalling all the things you used to love about it till you grew into big-boy pants.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    A spin-off of a sequel... It doesn't even try to be different, because it assumes the moviegoer wants only the same-ol' and then offers even less.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Redundant to the point of being absolutely pointless, a sequel that's almost a note-for-note, beat-for-beat redo of its predecessor, only with all the entertaining stuff left out.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    As the movie enters its final chapter, you will come to the sad, sickening realization that the filmmakers have played you for a chump. What seemed so smart, so well crafted and finely tuned, falls apart into a flaming heap of c---, and all goodwill is dashed.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Before things have even begun we know how they will end; this is pure Hollywood product, slicker than the insides of an oilcan.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    A little too loud, and a lot too boring.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Certainly it exists solely to sell a soundtrack; the movie, like most made for teens, is well beside the point.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    It's a plot more worn out than the tinsel boxed up in the attic. In the end, they've given us a Christmas gift barely worth returning.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    I liked when they had the paint fights and the pillow fights.
    • New Times (L.A.)
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Crowe renders David's dream (and its accompanying nightmare) so literal we can't help but leave the theater feeling as though we've been lectured to, told how to feel and what to think. And for an audience, that's a bit of a nightmare.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    This film about sex is so joyless, so astonishingly unsexy, it's like watching porn with your grandfather going tsk-tsk-tsk over your shoulder for two hours.
    • 83 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    In the end, The Apostle feels like a con, a movie that embraces its contradictions only because it's not smart enough to reconcile them; everything feels complex, but, in fact, it's far too simple.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    A comic-book movie unashamed of its roots, meaning it's unabashed about being silly, overwrought nonsense, which works to its benefit--so much so that you're almost rooting for it by the end.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    The movie comes off as willfully eccentric when it should have been charmingly touching.
    • 59 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    It may have been the perfect storm, but this is the imperfect movie.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    It's just a familiar bore, offering chills and thrills only to those who have never seen a movie before.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    Either a put-on or a straight shooter; that you can't tell the difference underscores its small but ultimately overwhelming flaws.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 40 Robert Wilonsky
    It's far more than merely disappointing that Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams lacks the charm and wit -- and humanity --of its predecessor. It's dispiriting.
    • New Times (L.A.)

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