For 151 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 33% higher than the average critic
  • 11% same as the average critic
  • 56% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 11.8 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Simon Abrams' Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 48
Highest review score: 100 The Great Beauty
Lowest review score: 0 Zookeeper
Score distribution:
  1. Positive: 50 out of 151
  2. Negative: 57 out of 151
151 movie reviews
    • 58 Metascore
    • 100 Simon Abrams
    Everything matters in Cronenberg's Cosmopolis, but not everything is necessarily the same as DeLillo's book. And that makes the film, as a series of discussions about inter-related money-minded contradictions, insanely rich and maddeningly complex. We can't wait to rewatch it.
    • 86 Metascore
    • 100 Simon Abrams
    This 43-year-old filmmaker is a major talent. Though he may not be the second coming of Fellini, his films all have a funny, refreshingly complex perspective, and his latest work is a perfect example of why he is the next big Italian thing.
    • 91 Metascore
    • 90 Simon Abrams
    Ronit's remarkable sensitivity makes Gett a tough but essential melodrama.
    • 72 Metascore
    • 90 Simon Abrams
    Haunted by death-obsessed men of action, Un Flic (A Cop) is a fitting final act for noir master Jean-Pierre Melville
    • 83 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    No, what's most disquieting about It Follows is the way it presents sex as neither abnormal, nor beneficial.
    • 83 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    Cave's soulful performance, shot in real-time and in extreme close-up, is that much more impressive once you realize he's playing a song for Forsyth and Pollard before he's performed it in front of a live audience.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    Something like a trippy grindhouse homage whose familiar images are refracted through a prism of blacklight posters, Jodorowsky films, and even Rob Zombie's grungy psychotropic sensibility.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    An irrepressibly charming B-movie that never over-stays its welcome, and is both conceptually clever and admirably well-executed.
    • 86 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    The film's flintiness and initially subdued nastiness set it apart from most other action films about the thin line separating cops from crooks.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    Japanese poet and cult filmmaker Shion Sono defines himself as an anti-establishment artist partly out of cynicism and partly thanks to his romantic concept of libertarianism.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 83 Simon Abrams
    The Lords of Salem is a product of Zombie’s better creative impulses, so it’s ok that it also features several of his worse indulgences, too.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 80 Simon Abrams
    Sunada's critical distance makes Kingdom of Dreams and Madness the clear-eyed celebration that Ghibli's artists deserve.
    • 83 Metascore
    • 80 Simon Abrams
    An emotionally generous and expansively detailed romantic fantasy.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Faults is a richly-textured movie that concerns the weird space between thinking you know what you're doing, and actually knowing what you're doing.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    R100 is, consequently, a comedy that tries to alienate you by suggesting that escapism is futile, all things inevitably devolve, and nothing inherently means anything.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    A sleepy, but pleasantly surprising action-adventure, Ragnarok is the rare Spielberg clone that feels like it was made by people that not only know what they like about Spielberg's films, but are capable of evoking them.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    As gory as it is corrosively cynical, a supernatural mood piece that's equally influenced by the arthouse horror movies of David Lynch and Roman Polanski, and the grindhouse-ready Satanic Panic films of the '70s, like "To the Devil a Daughter," and "The Devil Rides out."
    • 38 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    It's an anti-romantic biography about a great artist, one whose central themes are basic, but whose energy and execution is irresistible.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    The movie is so consistently moody, and so focused on driving you towards a gut-punch finale, that even valid complaints seem negligible in retrospect.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    More about ambience than narrative progress, so if you don't like these kinds of characters (ie: hippy-dippy aesthetes), the film will drive you up a wall.
    • 71 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    As It Is in Heaven ultimately doesn't go anywhere unexpected, but it does foster a potent, unexpected bond between its subjects and its audience.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Let the Bullets Fly is an intentionally overheated and very funny comedy about how the best-laid plans tend to fall apart in spectacular fashion.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Rarely goes so far over the top that it loses you completely. It is, to put it mildly, not subtle. But if you watch it expecting to see a dumb idea executed with appreciable skill, you'll have a blast.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Witching and Bitching is accordingly overlong, and conceptually thin. But like most of de la Iglesia's films, it's also freakishly energetic, and often hysterical.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    It's uneven, and more than a little mystifying, but Rigor Mortis is also a bittersweet coda to a deliriously silly series of films.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    It's a confrontational fever dream film told from constantly shifting perspectives, and a chilly, dizzying trip into a genre defined by violently conflicting emotions.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    It is also the post-punk writer/director Sion Sono's most accessible film: a middle-aged filmmaker's tribute to the kind of epic-sized gangster-romance he used to fantasize about making.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Hark's new film is a consummately bizarre crowd-pleaser that throws everything at the viewer from makeshift plastic surgery by acupuncture to death by spontaneous combustion.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    A worthy documentary tribute to the drag queen icon.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Come for Ku's joyful choreography, stay for Yen's most memorable post-comeback performance.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    The Taking of Tiger Mountain may not always be as grand as it should be, but its thrills compensate for its shortcomings.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Chashme Baddoor's modest charms dissipate quickly, but they're certainly real.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Piers McGrail's nuanced, moody cinematography brings out the best in writer-director Ivan Kavanagh's over-mannered but effectively creepy ghost story.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Boss is that rare Bollywood action film whose stars are worthy of the pedestal they're put on.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    First-time director Stiles White's effective use of long takes and director of photography David Emmerichs's wide-angle digital cinematography make an otherwise generic teen ghost story unexpectedly atmospheric.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Documentary character study Kung Fu Elliot starts off as a cringe-humor portrait of a delusional would-be action star, but gradually transforms into a thoughtful examination of its title character's naïveté.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Instead of over-glorifying their shared past, Ericsson pays loving tribute to what remains of his subjects' relationship.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Novel enough to be worth the price of admission, but you'll think twice before getting back in line for a second visit.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Thor: The Dark World's characters are often very charming, but they're only so much fun when they're stuck going through the motions.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    The good news barely outweighs the bad in Dracula Untold, a lightweight war-adventure that is ultimately stranger and more enticing when it remembers it's also a horror film.
    • 85 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Visually splendid, but generically flat-footed, Song of the Sea is an animated fantasy that comes close to greatness, but is rarely as clever as it is comforting.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Extraterrestrial never settles into a groove, and therefore never becomes more than a collection of effectively icky scenes.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Once Haunter's story snaps into focus, and its creators pull you towards its inevitable conclusion, the film's flaws become that much more apparent.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Ultimately, Beneath is better than your average Roger Corman clone because it is more serious than trivial.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    The filmmakers fall over themselves trying to respect Man's outlook on life, and this makes their subject seem more like a hyper-disciplined saint than a world-reknowned, ass-kicking hermit.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    It's as visually indistinct and paint-by-numbers-plot-driven as most Marvel Comics-based projects, especially the gaggle of recent Avengers-related films.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    The film's relentlessly quirky style of comedy is consequently very self-conscious. Every joke in Ping Pong Summer is a variation on a theme: 1985 was the most awkward time to be alive.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    The process of discovery that Evan goes through to get closer to Louise is what makes Spring special. But what Evan discovers about Louise feels like an after-thought that frustratingly overwhelms the film once it gets to where it's going.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Fassbinder's sumptuous 205-minute epic is intriguing as a prototype for later and more palatably cynical sci-fi standards like "Blade Runner" or even "Total Recall."
    • tbd Metascore
    • 60 Simon Abrams
    As a filmmaker, Drasnin should not have relied so singularly on Rittenberg's testimony.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 60 Simon Abrams
    While it doesn't cohere into anything more substantial than a collection of self-loathing anxieties, Japanese teledrama Penance is effectively unnerving on a scene-for-scene basis thanks to writer/director Kiyoshi Kurosawa's preference for ambience over character-driven drama.
    • 59 Metascore
    • 60 Simon Abrams
    Despite its title, Drew: The Man Behind the Poster is not a documentary about movie poster artist Drew Struzan. Instead, Struzan's poster art is the film's real subject.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 58 Simon Abrams
    Post Tenebras Lux is certainly unique, but Reygadas is often intensely more interested in provoking his audience than actually fleshing out his heady ideas.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    How badly do you want to see rabid computer-generated zombie-monkeys die violently? Because there's not much else worth recommending in [Rec] 4: Apocalypse.
    • 72 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    James Murphy never says that his music will sound different after LCD Soundsystem disbands, so why fearfully anticipate a change that we don't even know is coming?
    • 38 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Wiig really shines in the film, proving that her finely honed comic timing can make a character work even when the film ultimately doesn't.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The brutality of Tyrannosaur isn't so over the top as to make director Paddy Considine's sympathy for his flawed characters look like a sham. But it does frequently bring his film's seesawing exploration of blue-collar existence to the brink of collapse.
    • 59 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    It's for-horror-nuts-only, but if you can see it with a rowdy crowd, Dead Snow 2 will appreciate exponentially.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    It's refreshing to see Shark Night 3D director David R. Ellis try to pull off a semi-sincere second-generation "Jaws" rip-off, even if he doesn't quite succeed.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    [Thérèse] is not the nuanced period drama it should be but is rather more like a banal, pseudo-thoughtful and monotonous episode of Masterpiece Theater.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Wolves is consequently too violent to be a "Twilight" knockoff, and too cuddly to be an effectively freaky tale of a boy who, to paraphrase "Werewolf Bar Mitzvah," becomes a man while also becoming a wolf.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Tusk is bearable thanks in no small part to its game cast, particularly character actor Michael Parks's Vincent Price-esque baddy.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The film's biggest problem is a matter of tone and characterization: the characters constantly talk about how mean they can be, but their actions suggest otherwise.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Flawed but genuinely creepy ghost story The Woman in Black 2: Angel of Death is disappointing, but only because it comes close to greatness.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    So weak on a basic storytelling level that it makes you want to nitpick everything about it, from characters' generically illogical decisions (ex: Why are you running towards mounted guns?) to its cheap-looking, jiggly hand-held cinematography.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Watching Campbell over her shoulder or in a mirror is frustrating because it consistently limits our view of her character. Porterfield's people can't give anything away beyond their immediate aggression, frustration, and sadness. But it's hard to appreciate an intentionally blurry portrait of a family that's so impressionistic that all you can see of its already-withdrawn characters are their shadows.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Immoral Tales works best when its creator is focused on surprising viewers with his perverse imagination, and not his misguided cynicism.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Mud
    Mud is as unmoving as it is because it doesn’t aspire to be anything other than a competent anti-fairy tale in which the paint-by-number morals are enforced by equally obvious main protagonists.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The film is superficially tense throughout, but director Pandey doesn't know what to emphasize when.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    In spite of its conspicuously crude sense of humor, Delhi Belly is much more family-minded and innocent than it would like its young target audience to believe.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Corfixen celebrates her husband for being open in his work, but never shows us how his real-life concerns translate into commendable creative risk-taking.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Cocker's magnetic persona is a huge part of Pulp's identity, but it's not the band's greatest legacy. So don't be surprised when Cocker's gas-leak hiss of a voice is drowned out by smoke machine cannons, and fails to swell until it bursts at the end of "Common People."
    • 47 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The film is an 80-minute shaggy-dog story about the seductive power of storytelling and the weird places it can transport us; too bad writer- director Todd Rohal doesn't take us any place worth going.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Deepsea Challenge has too little interest in anything that's not Cameron's personal experience.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Chinese comedian Huang Bo justifies his status as a record-breaking mega-star in Breakup Buddies, a tone-deaf buddy comedy that's like 10 by way of Due Date.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    A puzzle movie with too many unnecessary pieces and not enough essential ones, but it's superior to its predecessor in a few basic ways.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The film's retro, John Carpenter-esque synthesizer score, composed by Jeff Grace, further pushes viewers away.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Puncture's story only moves forward thanks to Evans's charm. But a good lead performance can't single-handedly save thin material.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Like bad houseguests, the creators of Hell Baby overstay their welcome.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Unfortunately, Afflicted is as emotionally involving as a really accomplished special-effects sizzle reel.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 42 Simon Abrams
    Even with so many talented actors involved, there’s nothing really galvanizing or particularly provocative about Redford’s latest.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    By inexpertly filtering her art through her travails, Wood and Altunaga reimagine Parra's suicide as an explicable conclusion to her turbulent life.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Were it not for Partridge's and Mishra's performances, the generic plot -- Ray becomes inspired after bonding with Ashok, a down-on-his-luck Bollywood singer -- would be completely unmoving and unenlightening.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Alumbrones's creators talk up their work's restorative value, but never go into great detail about the world beyond their canvases. Donnelly's vague, circuitous questioning is to blame.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Any movie is improved at least 10 percent by the presence of Scottish actor Brian Cox, even mushy sports drama Believe.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Each propulsive segment features a handful of disturbing sequences... But such pleasures barely compensate for the vapidity of V/H/S: Viral's sketches.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    If anything unites On Any Sunday: The Next Chapter's cyclists, it's Brown and Rousseau's inability to highlight their subjects' most singular qualities.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    The most compelling thing about Friend 2 is its trifurcated plot, a structural gimmick borrowed from The Godfather Part II.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Nautanki Saala's creators spend so much time disinterestedly transitioning from one plot point to the next that they only effectively establish the haphazard nature of RP and Nandini's romance.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    More enervating than it is ambitious, Jake Squared is partly a romantic comedy and mostly a pseudo-philosophical apology for self-absorption.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Rock-dumb Hong Kong thriller That Demon Within is exhausting, and only sometimes batshit enough to be engaging.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Mistaken for Strangers doesn't reveal anything about Tom but his own insecurity.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Point and Shoot consequently feels like a film made by a storyteller — not a journalist — who doesn't know he can ask follow-up questions.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Green, who plays a snotty version of himself, doesn't follow through on any of the ideas that make his film stand out. As a result, Digging Up the Marrow just uselessly lies there, like a cat during a heat wave.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    If nothing else, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reminds us that nostalgia is often used as a mandate for spectacularly lazy filmmaking.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Khumba is disastrously uninspired. Not even a galaxy of stars, united in their willingness to take a check, can save Khumba from being the boringest plucky outsider of all.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    The film makes one damning if unoriginal observation—the "reality" presented on reality TV is manufactured—and then does nothing to expand on it.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    The Good Doctor isn't a ponderous bore because Blake isn't a strictly good or bad character: It sucks because he isn't even a compelling character.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Blood Glacier is too sleepy to do anything with its guano-stirring premise. Yes, there are crazy-go-nutty monsters in the film, but you seldom get to see them as they sadly are not the focus of Blood Glacier.

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