Susan Wloszczyna

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For 507 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 57% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 40% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 2.6 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Susan Wloszczyna's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 60
Highest review score: 100 Tarzan
Lowest review score: 0 Nine Lives
Score distribution:
  1. Negative: 90 out of 507
507 movie reviews
    • 35 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    All in all, Very Good Girls is a very bad excuse to subject those of us who have enjoyed Fanning ever since 2001’s "I Am Sam" to seeing her flash her bare fanny, fondle herself provocatively and cavort in her underwear for no dramatic purpose. Yes, she should be allowed to grow up onscreen. But without a story that justifies it, it just feels sad and desperate.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Rather than presenting something akin to the heady youthful cravings of Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes as contemporary versions of Romeo and Juliet, the equally tragic Marguerite & Julien often feels more like a version of Richie and Margot in Wes Anderson’s “The Royal Tenenbaums” crossed with the pre-teen runaways from “Moonrise Kingdom,” but minus the humor and insight.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    The Angry Birds Movie isn’t a total turkey. The animation itself is OK and I did laugh out loud once.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    It settles for the recycled emotions of the past despite the fact "Schindler's List" has forever made such treatment shamefully passe. [18Apr1997 Pg.03.D]
    • USA Today
    • 18 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    t's far too soon for an actress as vital as Jessica Lange to stoop to Bette Davis-Joan Crawford horror-hag histrionics. [6 Mar 1998, pg.04D]
    • USA Today
    • 38 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    The transition from Hanna-Barbera animation to manic-barbaric live action falls flatter than a granite slab, from the first of many deadly stone-age wordplays - "Steven Spielrock Presents" - to the gross-out shots of dirty tootsies. [27 May 1994 Pg. 01.D]
    • USA Today
    • 21 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    As a condescening moron who natters on non-stop in this simplistic comedy, Elliott doesn't just wear out his welcome, he nukes it. [14 Jan 1994]
    • USA Today
    • 33 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Pytka may know how to push fizzy water, but he certainly can't make a punch line sparkle. [21 Aug 1989]
    • USA Today
    • 54 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    How to Be a Latin Lover all too quickly devolves into a nearly two-hour slog showcasing Mexican comedy superstar Eugenio Derbez’s attempt to seduce U.S. audiences with a cheesy bilingual spoof of an ethnic stereotype long past its expiration date.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Just like its albino-like villains, this Village is a pale imitation. [28 Apr 1995, p.3D]
    • USA Today
    • 32 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    The story ends up being one wrong turn after another. A GPS hasn’t been invented that could get this plot-hole-riddled script back on track.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Yes, the casual-chic interior designs shine as much as her mom’s ever did. But I never really felt at home with Home Again.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Unless you have a craving to watch a sluggish Ski-Doo race or want to admire Chase dressed as a hula dancer, consider this the cinematic equivalent of yellow snow.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    The concept is so hypocritical, it's like Britney Spears calling Christina Aguilera underdressed and overexposed.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    As late Christmas presents go, Reindeer Games is best left unwrapped.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Not even scaremeister director Wes Craven can awaken this story. Murphy's pale efforts are enough to make one fondly recall Blacula. Now that was one sucker who knew how to make a film that didn't. [27 Oct 1995, p.4D]
    • USA Today
    • 42 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    For far too long, nothing especially creepy or unsettling happens on screen.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    When it comes to being brainless, The Skulls is at the head of the class.
    • USA Today
    • 36 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Let’s look on the bright side. The running time is barely 90 minutes. And there are but three fairly amusing characters who save this inferior attempt at family entertainment, at least for me.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    The Wal-Mart of cinematic soap operas. One-stop shopping for your emotional movie needs.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Vile, violent and less hip than it thinks it is.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Can't scare up a decent plot.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    A glossy wisp of a cautionary tale.
    • USA Today
    • 40 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    With a few, rare exceptions, the attempts at humor in “Suicide Squad” land with a thud—that is, if you can hear such a sound over the deafening din of gunfire and the bombastic score.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Except for a brief episode in which singer Chris Isaak and Kiefer Sutherland make like an FBI Rocky and Bullwinkle, this is a morbidly joyless affair. You'll feel as drained as one of Cooper's mugs of joe watching homecoming queen Laura drown in a whirlpool of sex and drugs. [31 Aug 1992]
    • USA Today
    • 37 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    Writer/producer John "Home Alone" Hughes, the Marquis de Sade of kidcom, and director Les Mayfield manage to squeeze the very bounce out of what should have been a can't-miss update. [26Nov1997 Pg09.D]
    • USA Today
    • 22 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    While Lutz might possess the beefcake to fill out his chest armor, he lacks the acting chops to make us much care about the fate of his gleaming hero who looks as if he just stepped out of a Beverly Hills salon.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    If "You've Got Mail" jangled your nerves with its Starbucks-fueled cuteness, here's a romance that goes down like instant decaf. [15 January 1999, Life, p.18E]
    • USA Today
    • 31 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    The more curdled-than-cuddly holiday film already had offended this former copy editor even before I entered the theater. Its crime? The lack of punctuation in its name.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 38 Susan Wloszczyna
    CB4
    With only momentary grandmaster flashes of brainless fun, too much of CB4 belongs in the hip-hopper. [12 Mar 1993, p.8D]
    • USA Today

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