1. hudehuiduhhu

   Oct 11, 2013

   10

   This game is awesome. i die laughing every time I play it, if you want to explode randomly.
   
   this part is required for the short review so thanks for reading.… Expand

   • 0 of 6 users found this helpful
2. PRHEagles

   Jul 3, 2013

   3

   I'll be honest, this game deserves a 1. It has terrible driving physics, gameplay, a ridiculous story, and fully clothed sex scenes.The reason I gave the game a 3, however, is because of how hilarious the game is to play with a couple of mates and a fridge full of beer. The glitches are so horrific that it's hard to believe the game could possibly make it to store shelves. I recommend buying the game for $10 in a month or two, inviting some friends over, getting smashed, and having a night of drunken fun.… Expand

   • 7 of 8 users found this helpful
3. stranglehold

   Jun 30, 2013

   1

   Don’t play Ride to Hell: Retribution. Don’t think about playing it. Don’t think about thinking about playing it. Forget it exists, and continuontinue your life as though it never did.… Expand

   • 17 of 20 users found this helpful
4. Nyxx

   Aug 20, 2013

   0

   This game sucks. Let me get it out of the way right now. This is, without a doubt, the worst game of 2013 thus far.
   That said, you must play this game, or watch a let's play of it. It's absolutely hilarious. Not worth $30 of your own money, but hilarious nonetheless.
   
   Performance: Looks like an early-era PS2 game. The models are weird and blocky, textures are exceedingly horrible, and glitches pop up all over the place. Throw in random crashes, and just as random FPS dives, you have a game that one may consider, "Not very optimized and good looking". They're that bad.
   
   Sound: About six or seven music tracks that repeat throughout the entire game. You'll grow bored with them quickly. The sound effects are weak, and makes it seem like you're hitting your foes with Nerf weapons. However, the saving grace is the hilariously bad voice acting.
   
   The VA is Resident Evil 1 quality, and that's not entirely a bad thing. Just about every line in this game is read so awkwardly it's sure to bring a smile to your face.
   
   Control: I won't be judging the game's control, as much as I'll be judging the lack of it. There are two "modes" in the game: When you're on a motorcycle, and when you're on foot.
   
   On a motorcycle, the controls are hilariously bad. There's no physics, you awkwardly slide around on the bike, and the Powerslide move is...you just have to see it. What's not so hilarious is the combat on a 'cycle: To beat enemies, you have to mash a button until a bar is full, then they're instantly killed. Repeat about 10 times per section. It's not great.
   
   On foot, you have full access to your weapons. You can point, shoot, and take cover, generic stuff, but you can also, like Dead to Rights: Retribution, mix it up with melee combat. And, just like in Dead to Rights: Retribution, it doesn't work very well.
   
   Melee combat works like this: Preform the guard block on someone, mash the attack button, repeat. There's a counter mechanic, like Arkham Asylum/City, but it doesn't serve that much of a purpose, since most of the fist fights are painfully easy and repetitive.
   
   Occasionally, the protagonist gets mad and makes a hilarious scream, and then preforms an insta-kill QTE that actually takes longer to kill the enemies as opposed to just hitting them. Worth seeing at least once.
   
   Gunplay, well, it works. You can shoot things, but even the tutorial games developed in the Gamemaker engine can pull that off. The real issue is, a lot of the controls revolve around QTEs. That's not okay, at all.
   
   Gameplay: You play as Jake Conway, the son of William Conway, who was part of a bike gang known as Retribution. Your brother was killed by a rival gang named The Devil's Hand, and Jake is out for revenge. Don't worry, the story doesn't get any deeper than this, and just about everyone has no character development at all.
   
   With a storyline as simple as this, they certainly did a good job making it seem more complicated than it really is: The beginning of the game is nothing but a swarm of flashbacks, and it does a great job confusing you. However, the best part of this game are the cutscenes, with many of them making no sense, and all of them poorly done in a hilarious fashion.
   
   The 'cycle segments are super repetitive, with the same dull combat all the way through. More excitingly, sometimes your bike will randomly explode, and you'll have to load from the last checkpoint.
   
   On foot, enemies range from generic thin goons who take only a few punches/shots to take out, to Jason wannabes who are damn-near immune to everything. I wasted what seemed like fifty bullets, trying to take one out.
   
   Supposedly, you have to destroy a barrel to kill them more efficiently, but doing so only screwed up my screen, and did damage to me. All the guns are boring, and the melee combat is spam-y as all get-out.
   
   The boss fights are all gimmicks. The first one being you chasing him down on a bike, with a machine gun. You literally have no room for error, and every time you fail, it's all the way at the beginning of the segment. The checkpoints in this game are the worst I've seen in a while. You die, you're doing a 20-minute segment over again, more often than not.
   
   After that, you have a 'town' where you can buy weapons and upgrade your bike. The bike upgrade system isn't bad, but it's completely pointless. There's not much else to do other than go to the next mission.
   
   Oh, there are sex scenes, where you take the women of the Devil's Hand, after beating up their lovers. While fully clothed. There's even a five-on-one situation, where everyone is clothed. So don't worry, not only are they being blatantly sexist (every woman is there for sex), they're also being exceedingly stupid.
   
   This was originally gonna be a sandbox game, like GTA. And I like the ideas it had. A year after that, they rushed it after realized they didn't either have the ability or the time, and we get this glitchy, barely playable mess. Hilarious to watch, but don't buy it yourself.… Expand

   • 0 of 0 users found this helpful
5. Lomad12

   Aug 16, 2013

   0

   Could be worse than cancer. The gameplay is virtually not there at all. the art is from 8 years ago, Half life 2 looks better and it is9 years old. women are just used as swx machines and are nothing else, a truly awful game.… Expand

   • 1 of 1 users found this helpful
6. PuppetMaster9

   Jul 29, 2013

   0

   Instead of focusing on everything that's wrong with this game, I'll focus on what's right with it: literally the one correct thing about the game is that the "Ride to Hell" part is scarily accurate.… Expand

   • 4 of 4 users found this helpful
7. AleksandarGamer

   Jul 17, 2013

   0

   I remembered how they annouced the Ride to Hell back in 2008 and they said it will be out in 2009, and nothing happened until now! Duke Nukem Forever's story is same here! They just put some random things inside the game just to release it! And what do we got?! Nothing except awful, generic and frustrating game! Controls, graphics, physics... EVERYTHING IS COMPLETELY AWFUL!! Don't buy this game, save your money.… Expand

   • 3 of 3 users found this helpful

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