I'd write a longwinded review on this movie or i could just completely quote Variety, because it is exactly what i was thinking. i saw the movie, saw that tons of fanboys were praising it and then read Variety. Variety's opinion was on point. the only reason i gave it 4 points, as im sure the same reason that variety gave it 10x my score is that, well, Sherri-Moon Zombie is a fuckin babe. minus her, this movie blows… Expand

Legendary producer and studio head Samuel Goldwyn never uttered wiser words than when he advised Hollywood to, rather than remaking hit movies and trying to make lightning strike twice, instead redo their flops until they get them right. However, two recent terrific remakes (or perhaps more accurately, reimaginings) of legendary works prove that even the best of us aren't right 100% of the time: last year's Casino Royale, in reinventing the James Bond saga (but keeping it present day rather than returning it to a Cold War time capsule) made 007 far less superhuman and more vulnerable, and thus much closer to Ian Fleming's original conception. And while nobody loves and reveres the 1933 King Kong more than Peter Jackson (who has often admitted in interviews that it's the movie that inspired him to become a filmmaker in the first place), his brilliant 2005 take didn't shy away from correcting its two sorest points: the original's inherent racism and Fay wray's frustrating refusal to acknowledge the big guy as something other than a scary best, much less treat him with even the slightest iota of kindness, let alone affection. It would be nice to report that Rob Zombie's ambitious meditation on John Carpenter's seminal 1978 horror classic joins this worthy duo, but--and this is putting it VERY kindly--the talented horror auteur fails to pull off the hat trick. In trying to flesh out amorphous mad slasher Michael Myers (whose unmasked face is only glimpsed twice onscreen in Carpenter's original) and explain what happened in his childhood to make him the remorseless, unstoppable killing machine he beacame, Zombie succeeds only in trivializing his source material. Fans of this previous efforts, House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects (count me in) will not be surprised to learn that Mikey's troubles germinated from being brought up by a group of foulmouthed, subhuman white-trash rednecks, but they'll be hard pressed not to consider that Zombie's creative well is getting more than a little parched: might I suggest to Zombie that his next horror thriller feature no male characters with hair longer than that worn by Spencer Tracy in any movie he made in 1938? Equally predictably, the scenes that work the most effectively are the ones that most directly parrot Carpenter's original staging (and admittedly his legendary electronic music score sounds dynamite in Dolby stereo!) but Zombie shoots, stabs and amputates his own foot by adding astonishingly unpleasant ultrarealistic carnage and gore to a property that Richard Corliss accurately described in its original run as having as little blood onscreen as an anemic ant...which helped Carpenter, despite the body count, to deliver a wonderful campfire ghost story that was a delicious bit of fun escapism. Even Zombie's most likable characteristic--his frequent casting of 1970s and 80s actors he admires (Sid Haig, Leslie Easterbrook, etc.)--goes for naught; his distasteful, nihilistic use of Dee Wallace, who was so memorably sympathetic in E.T., The Howling and Blake Edwards' 10, made me genuinely angry. Zombie has too much imagination and far too distinctive a voice to be lumped in with all the current torture porn directors, and his apparent intention to unflinchingly depict the psychological and physical pain beneath the surface of Carpenter's original is certainly unique, but to this mind the only viewers who can possibly enjoy two hours of child abuse, unrelenting viscera and Michael's victims pleading with him to finish the job are those who, like Michael himself, cause their neighbors to keep their household pets locked up. The closest thing to a compliment I can bring myself to offer Zombie's Halloween is that it's one of the rarest of birds: a movie whose intentions are intriguing--maybe even honorable--but whose realization of same is so relentlessly scummy and repugnant that many who have experienced it will not want to go six blocks or less near a theater showing it (or, in the near future, a Blockbuster Video renting the DVD) without wanting to take three long hot showers and undergo a thorough delousing afterward.… Expand

Maybe it's true of "The Devil's Rejects" as well, but here, this unnecessary but not altogether pointless remake of the John Carpenter "classic", unmistakably has that David Lynch touch(one man's misogyny is another man's realism) of unerotic female nudity(an instance of a topless corpse and then there's the girl who's topless and bloody) and overstylized regional-situated dialogue. "Halloween" owes a debt of gratitude to "Blue Velvet". The bloody and topless girl who gets in the way of Michael's warpath is comparable to Isabella Rossellini's full-frontal stagger across Kyle McLachlan's lawn. There's breasts on the screen but you want to look away. In a slasher pic, you accept the blood, you accept the screaming woman in peril, but you shouldn't accept something that looks straight out of a snuff film. What "Halloween" has going for it, however, is the weird white trash energy of Michael Myers' family. Sheri Moon is a very underrated actress.… Expand

Horrible job by Rob Zombie. I dont know much about Zombie's life, but is he white trash or was his upbringing like that? Honestly, after 3 movies now, You would think RZ could come up with something different. The start and end of the movie are horrendous. And why does the dialogue have to be so bad? Every other word is a curse and some of it is so bad, you just gotta laugh. Honestly, everything we loved about the original, the character buildup and the suspense of Myers is completely gone. To each his own I guess.… Expand

After watching so many greatest horror movies of all time, I heard that this remake was made and I haven't even seen it in theaters besides other great movies in 2007. Later, I decided to watch this on Youtube just to look at it. When I saw Michael Myers' parents arguing at each other, I was like, "Did that happen in the 1970s version?", and waited to see Michael kill her sister Judith Myers(just like that other movie), but When I saw his mother kill herself after seeing Michael killing another person, I stopped watching it and went on to something else.

I hate to say this, but Rob Zombie just simply failed to put some charm from the original. I mean, some of the scenes have reenactments from the original and Malcolm Mcdowell was the right actor for Dr. Loomis, but the storyline was very confusing, so uninteresting, and boringly dull. I'm sorry, but Rob Zombie would've at least try to make this remake good.

This movie may not be the worst ever, but its just forgettable.

At my highest hopes, this one deserves a 4/10 thanks to its reenactments and Malcolm Mcdowell.… Expand

When I watched the original Halloween I just remember thinking "this needs more boob and blood." Oh wait no I didn't. One thing thats been lost on the horror genre is that we as an audience don't need to see everything. We all have our imaginations and most of the time that can be a whole lot scarier then anything that can be put on screen. I don't need to see every single gory detail of the murder just the person being killed by the killer can be scary enough. Also why did we need the rape scene. It did nothing to further the plot except in telling us that Michael got out while two red necks were raping a girl. The theater version didn't have the rape and I didn't have any issues with how he got out. The only positive from this movie is that it does a good job of giving a back story too Michael. But the truth is we didn't need a back story, again no back story is almost scarier. Watch the original its a much better film.… Expand

The first 45 minutes is brilliant with Zombie creating psychological backstory but as soon as we hit the "15 years later" section, it's as if he had no ideas left and the movie stumbles hopelessly. You set up Myers as a complex sociopath and the world Zombie creates is very believable. How can we then expect to believe that after being shot multiple times and stabbed in the neck Myers can shake it off like an annoying mosquito bite?… Expand

It succeeded at being disturbing and suspenseful, which is Rob Zombie's forte. But after the first 30 minutes, the storytelling became dull, contrived and poorly delivered. The deaths are toned down, and several pairs of boobs are thrown in for good measure. Zombie's fails at his challenge to portray Michael Myers' perspective after the character grows from a kid from a broken home to the legendary silent sociopath we all know.… Expand

Probably the best in the series since the original but that isn't saying much. The opening scene was just painfully to watch. I haven't heard that much dialogue without anything remotely important being said since QT's Deathproof. The problem with this movie is the backstory of Myers doesn't work. The original had one scene a boy holding a bloody knife that left so much to the imagination that we personally made what we thought his creepy story was in our heads. The story is not important but the image is. Less is more especially in this movie.… Expand

This movie had the potential to do justice to the original Halloween. It starts off promising, giving us a thorough examination of Michael Myers psychology, but things nosedive soon after that. The ending is a major disappointment and as many others have noted, there is little suspense involved in the murders. The cast does a decent job of delivering some terrible dialogue also. It all just seemed over-the-top.… Expand

This is the biggest disappointment of the summer. Rob Zombie showed such promise with The Devil's Rejects, and here, he loses all that. The film is disjointed, plays around too much with the Halloween myth, and worse of all, isn't scary or suspenseful in the slightest. By giving a back story to Michael Myers, he strips away what truly made him frightening, his unrelenting evil. A faceless, voiceless monster who has no rhyme or reason to what he does. It had potential, but Zombie should've focused on something here. Anything really. Either a prequel or a remake, not both. The final half of this film is so dull and pointless, I kept looking at my watch. Something I didn't even do during Halloween 6. Rob, please, make a better movie next time.… Expand

This film is terrible. Everyone giving it a high score is doing it simply because they're a rob zombie fan. I like rob zombie. I love the Halloween series. I hated this movie.

Rob Zomie shouldn't made this classic. He just destroyed it. First of all, Danielle Harris (Annie Brackett, Jamie Lloyd in Halloween 4 & 5) shouldn't been in the movie. She played Jamie Lloyd in Part 4 and 5, and decided not to play in "The Curse of Michael Myers" and now she is back in this one.. Second, this movie is nothing like the original one. This movie was like a 30 minute fireworks show; a little bangs here and there and then the finale at the end where everything is in one.… Expand

Very disappointing. There was NO suspense....no "hold your breath" moments waiting and wondering what will happen next. This movie was NOT scary....it was merely GORY. There was an economy of talent, performing a plodding story that simply laid everything out on the table, leaving nothing to the imagination. The back story idea could have been a real gem, and could have begun a sense of mystery and suspense. Instead, it played like an over-the-top Saturday Night Live made-for-TV segment. Throughout the movie, cute was too cutesy, and vile was shouted instead of whispered. This could have been a great horror movie. It SHOULD have been a great horror movie. Instead, it was a poorly written, poorly acted, poorly directed, suspense-less and horror-less flop. I give it a "3" rating based solely on the idea behind the back story and the unrealized potential for a modern horror classic that lurks beneath the surface.… Expand

Imagine a second grader taking three or four of his favorite toy dolls and play-acting out the original "Halloween" at the kitchen table. Yeah. It's kind of like that.

Ruined, smoted, and torn asunder by the incompetence that is Rob Zombie. He's my "an hero."

Horrifically brutal, unoriginal, topped with a poor script and cast, Halloween is one of the worst remakes to hit the horror genre yet. It is hard to watch not only from the gore, but also from every other individual aspect. Pass on this one.

Really disappointing. This film is not only meant to be a remake of the brilliant horror film Halloween from the 70s but it is also meant to explore and explain how Michael became the brutal killer that he is, but this film fails on both fronts. It doesn't really explain why he is a murderer, instead we just see Michael killing people as a child and by the time the film reaches the classic Halloween premise with Michael returning as an adult, the film just turns into completely mindless gore and violence that quickly stops being scary. There's just nothing clever in the horror, the only things it has to offer are its jump scares and its gore. There also seems to be a number of completely pointless events to get a reaction from the audience, such as a random rape scene...I'm not joking. This film had potential but it has sadly failed to give us anything more than just a few mild scares.… Expand

this movie was trash its so pathetic how zombie actually thinks hes a director and having the first 15 minutes being about Micheal as a child was probably the worst thing about this movie the worst movie of the summer by far!!

Mr. Zombie, I love your music, but I think you should stay out of the filmmaking business. The remake of Halloween is really not much more than an exhibition of repulsive characters dropping f-bombs all over the place. Lost are the suspense and terror of the original Halloween, only to be replaced with buckets of profanity, nudity, and gore. A good movie requires some actual substance, not over-the-top trash. I guess that fits in nicely with the type of horror movies we are getting these days though. I found myself stifling yawns during this movie when it was almost an hour in and Michael Myers still had not even escaped from Smith's Grove. Just FAR too much time spent (or wasted) on explaining why Michael Myers turned into a brutal killer. What really should have been the main event in Myers returning to Haddonfield turned into a rushed bloodbath with all of the main characters introduced and promptly swept under the carpet. This movie pales in comparison to the original, and used copies will quickly start showing up in droves at Movie Stop, etc.… Expand

This movie is one word: BORING! Virtually no suspense like the original and the camera shakes so much that you can't even enjoy the gore! And it's a horror movie!!! Where are the frights??? One lame jump scene and that's it! Rob Zombie is just okay as director, but a terrible writer and the combo makes for a real snooze-fest. Very disappointing.

nice try, good production values, earnest effort - but it is neither shocking nor suspenseful, looks like a remake made for TV. No fun whatsoever and absolutely no scary scene.

Awful, awful, awful. Terrible script. The dialogue is awful and the filmmaking is often times, inept.

I've watched and re-watched this movie despite myself, trying to find some reason not to finally and conclusively write off Rob Zombie as a one-note hack... and I simply can't do it. Not only does he fail to capture any of the style and essence of John Carpenter's source material, he can barely make this movie stand on its own legs. Don't be fooled by the vastly improved production values

Really pointless movie. Everyone I was with hated it too. I love horror movies, but this one sucked. I can't believe all the 9's and 10's.

It's a Zombie film so I expected what I saw in the first twenty minutes of the movie: rednecks cursing and unlistenable rock music that takes away from the cinematography. After this it's pretty much a who's-who of B-movie legends and dialogue so bad even Tarantino wouldn't use it. It felt more like a ninety minute promo for WWE's Summerslam than a real movie.

awful. why remake this? a typical slaughter fest by the numbers.

Why did this get remade?