Machete Kills
Metascore
41

Mixed or average reviews - based on 33 Critics

Critic score distribution:
  1. Positive: 6 out of 33
  2. Mixed: 19 out of 33
  3. Negative: 8 out of 33
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  1. The Globe and Mail (Toronto)
    Reviewed by: Dave McGinn
    Oct 10, 2013
    38
    It is all so intentionally ridiculous that it gets boring, and you just wait for the next big cornball revelation to momentarily jolt you awake, like Sofia Vergara strapping on her machine-gun bra, or Lady Gaga’s appearance as a hit woman. Machete kills, sure. Unfortunately, he overkills.
  2. Washington Post
    Reviewed by: Michael O'Sullivan
    Oct 10, 2013
    37
    It’s exhausting. It’s also not particularly funny or engaging.
  3. The New York Times
    Reviewed by: Stephen Holden
    Oct 10, 2013
    30
    All too soon, Machete Kills collapses into a deranged, directionless splatter comedy that exhausts its bag of tricks, many of them recycled from this grindhouse auteur’s 2010 spoof.
  4. Los Angeles Times
    Reviewed by: Mark Olsen
    Oct 10, 2013
    30
    Machete Kills winds up a slightly camp, tinny parody of bad action movies, playing out with the same sense of tedium as a genuine bad action movie.
  5. The Hollywood Reporter
    Reviewed by: Justin Lowe
    Oct 6, 2013
    30
    The cinematic axiom of diminishing returns appears to be catching up with Robert Rodriguez’s Machete franchise in only the second installment, as the series’ engagingly lowbrow concept gets overwhelmed by episodic plotting and uninspired, rote performances.
  6. St. Louis Post-Dispatch
    Reviewed by: Joe Williams
    Oct 11, 2013
    25
    When a celebrity chef like Rodriguez is just going through the motions, we can smell that the grindhouse fad is way past its expiration date. It's time to put a fork in it.
  7. New York Daily News
    Reviewed by: Joe Neumaier
    Oct 10, 2013
    20
    Machete Kills? “Machete Bores” is more like it.
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  8. New York Magazine (Vulture)
    Reviewed by: David Edelstein
    Oct 7, 2013
    20
    The carnage (with its computer-­generated splatter) is meant to be campy fun, but it’s so offhand that there’s less suspense than in an Austin Powers movie.

User Reviews

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User Score
6.5

Generally favorable reviews- based on 26 Ratings

User score distribution:
  1. Positive: 4 out of 7
  2. Mixed: 2 out of 7
  3. Negative: 1 out of 7
  1. StriderKiwi
    Oct 11, 2013
    9
    What an amazing movie. It's so freaking ridiculous, even more so than the original in all the right ways. The action is great, bloody and creative. The plot is so bonkers and unpredictable you'll always be wondering what will happen next, the casting is excellent and many of the many many maaaaaany characters are likeable and they have some epic lines. Machete Kills is the most fun I've had at the cinemas since Pacific Rim. If you and your friends want to have a good, absurd time, then this is the movie for you.… Full Review »
  2. Thegodfatherson
    Oct 11, 2013
    10
    Guns don’t kill. Machete Kills! Actually, the opening scene of this bizarre sequel to the even bizarre-er 2010 original Machete shows that gununs do kill. They just don’t kill Machete (Danny Trejo), whom you’ll recall from the first film survived a shot to the head when the bullet was blocked by another bullet, already lodged in his skull. Machete Kills continues director/co-writer Robert Rodriguez’s penchant for outrageous plot developments performed by “what-the?” casting choices. Mel Gibson plays a villain straight out of a Bond film Moonraker, to be precise. Charlie Sheen (listed in the credits by his birth name, Carlos Estevez) follows in his father’s footsteps as the U.S. President. And Lady Gaga is introduced as “whoever she wants to be.” Name your box-office poison. If Fatty Arbuckle were still around, he’d have a cameo for sure. Yet somehow, the results work. That’s probably because Rodriguez takes nothing seriously. The plot which could fit on the back of a cereal box, but only the really sugary kind involves a Mexican madman (Oscar nominee Demian Bichir) who wants the U.S. to clean up the corruption in his country, or he’ll fire a nuclear warhead at Washington. (Apparently he’s been reading Madman Tactics for Dummies.) President Sheen, or Estevez, or whatever, calls on Machete to help. “You know Mexico,” he tells the taciturn strongman. “Hell, you are Mexico.” Helping him will be a government agent played by Amber Heard. Her cover identity is beauty pageant winner Miss San Antonio, but has the operative gone too deep into character? In one scene she texts Machete: CU There! More about the story I cannot reveal. It’s not that I’m against spoilers; I just wasn’t sure what was going on most of the time, although whatever it is, it’s as funny as a roadrunner cartoon and only about 2.5 times as violent. Machete faces off against La Camaleón, a shape-shifting assassin played by a bewildering array of actors (Cuba Gaga Banderas Jr., etc). He crosses paths with Desdemona (Sofia Vergara), whose 32F brassieres pack a 38-calibre punch. (You’ll never guess where she keeps her backup firepower.) He hooks up with former partner Luz (Michelle Rodriguez), who sports a sexy eye patch and has a feminist revolutionary poster on her wall that reads Shé. And he makes use of a road-tunnel under the U.S.-Mexican border, stolen directly from 2009’s Fast & Furious. The movie runs for 107 minutes but features a ticking-clock timeline that allows it to pack more into 24 hours than, well, 24. And it opens with a fake trailer for Machete Kills Again In Space! At least, I think it’s a fake trailer. You may recall that the first Machete sprang from just such a bogus teaser, attached to 2007’s Grindhouse. So while Machete likes to say “Machete don’t” lines Machete don’t smoke, tweet, joke, etc. the one thing Machete seems destined to do is return.… Full Review »
  3. papanez
    Oct 13, 2013
    8
    As a fan of the first Machete film I really liked this movie. Great escapism over the top fun as well as a good parody of the grind house type films I saw as a teen in the 70's at local theaters both drive-in and otherwise. My only complaint about this movie was the lack of gratuitous female nudity. Hopefully Mr. Rodriguez will make up for this in the next installment "Machete Kills Again... in space!" Looking forward to that one. Ignore the negative reviews! This is a fun, entertaining film; it doesn't take itself too seriously and nor should the viewer, Watch it and enjoy!… Full Review »
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