Metascore
18

Overwhelming dislike - based on 27 Critics

Critic score distribution:
  1. Positive: 2 out of 27
  2. Negative: 21 out of 27
  1. Ritchie made a movie that never pretends to be more than a guilty pleasure of soft-core kitsch, and Madonna and Giannini (son of Giancarlo, costar of the original) achieve a lively S&M chemistry.
  2. 63
    At its best, Swept Away is like a scrapbook of postcards starring two lovebirds with great tans.
  3. Madonna herself is not so much terrible as merely uninvolving. She's quite credible as the harpy of the first act, but she can't pull off the transition and the spark that makes a movie star instantly sympathetic.
  4. 40
    The effectiveness of this kind of issue-driven give and take relies heavily on casting, and Ritchie puts himself at a disadvantage: Madonna looks terrific in a bikini but she can't act, and the younger Giannini is stunt casting.
  5. Reviewed by: Dennis Harvey
    40
    A simple misfire rather than a world-class fiasco. This misguided attempt to remake Lina Wertmuller's corrosive 1974 satire as a wistful romance is only unintentionally funny in the last reel.
  6. 40
    Schizoid romantic comedy -- The first half of the movie is full of broad but capable comedy, but the original film's sexual and class politics are clumsily handled, and the mood turns serious with all the subtlety of a falling guillotine blade.
  7. One hopes that this is Hollywood's last go-round with Swept Away. Watching this fiasco, I kept having nightmares about a possible cartoon version, co-starring Cruella de Vil and Shrek.
  8. 38
    The fact that Swept Away got made at all implies there simply is no dissuading Madonna from her movie-star aspirations. Her tenacity is admirable, but it's also block-headed.
  9. 38
    A bad movie. No amount of perfume sprayed on talk show audiences by Madonna and her husband can eliminate the stench of failure emanating from this motion picture.
  10. 30
    For starters, it blows. Madonna continues to mistake a knack for striking poses with the interpretive skill of a real actor.
  11. Madonna may be better in this film than she's been in some of her recent endeavors, especially when she stops screeching her lines, but she's done herself no favors with her choice of material.
  12. 25
    A deserted island movie during which I desperately wished the characters had chosen one movie to take along if they were stranded on a deserted island, and were showing it to us instead of this one.
  13. The junior Giannini, who has inherited Giancarlo's handsome looks, portrays his mercurial character with energy and flair. Madonna doesn't. Indeed, it's hard to remember the last time a certified celebrity gave a performance so monotonous, unimaginative, and all-around tiresome to watch.
  14. No less laughable is the ending, where Ritchie neatly reflects today's prevailing attitude -- that audiences can't be trusted to handle a hint of ambiguity, but can live happily with flat-out stupidity.
  15. 20
    Suggests that we're supposed to take this love story as something more than farce. Please. Tom Hanks fucking that volleyball would have been more convincing.
  16. 20
    Ritchie's frivolous comedy tries to have it both ways, thinning out the material for mass consumption while still sticking to the script -- an unstable alchemy that backfires horribly.
  17. Merely an indulgent vehicle for Mrs. Ritchie -- and Madonna is so spectacularly convincing as a hateful, self-absorbed, nouveau riche ogress that her character's third-act transformation is as preposterous as her overmuscled physique.
  18. There is no credible feeling here, no comedy, no eroticism.
  19. At no point should anyone mistake this for an actual movie. This is an extended beach video that will leave no one swept away.
  20. 10
    It certainly didn't take long for Madonna to ruin husband Guy Ritchie's career.
  21. 10
    Isn't dubbed. But it sure feels like it. The characters open their mouths and their lips don't seem to be shaping the right words -- you can't believe any human beings would ever utter such ludicrous dialogue, with so little conviction.
  22. If you were expecting Ritchie to discover something in Madonna that no one else has, something like, say, acting talent, forget it.
  23. Reviewed by: Jeff Giles
    10
    It stinks. The movie is so inert -- and Madonna’s performance so starkly amateurish -- that it’s impossible to take it seriously as an allegory about class and gender.
  24. The film turns out to have nothing going for it at all, except a small charge for soul-deep Madonna haters.
  25. A shrill, amateurish two-character play that demeans women and leaves men with the quaint notion that the best way to a woman's heart is through enslavement.
  26. 0
    Not as bad as rumor would have it. It's worse.
  27. Even camp status eludes this tepid and misguided picture.
User Score
5.2

Mixed or average reviews- based on 49 Ratings

User score distribution:
  1. Positive: 15 out of 25
  2. Mixed: 0 out of 25
  3. Negative: 10 out of 25
  1. Mar 5, 2012
    8
    This film actually was surprisingly good. I rented the video before I read the reviews, and after I read the recviews I was a little nervous to watch it. When I did watch it, I was delighted to see that it was an actual good story line. Despite what other critic and viewers have said, I thought Madonna's performance was pretty good! I would recommend seeing it! Although the ending was most disappointing and sad, I realized that every story can't end like a fairy tale. Full Review »
  2. Oct 28, 2011
    10
    Verdaderamente me entretuve viendo la película, me parece que ninguno de los actores principales hacen un perfecto papel pero sí lo hacen de manera adecuada. En todo caso la historia es entretenida. Puede observarse la belleza de la naturaleza, incluida la belleza de los actores principales. La tengo dentro de mi colección de películas. Por cierto: Viva la Reina Full Review »
  3. Aug 27, 2011
    1
    As much as you have to love Madonna as a singer, she cannot act. She just cannot. Because of that, the movie is already ruined. You have to admire her for trying, but you can't admire the movie. Full Review »