Ted

Universal Pictures | Release Date: June 29, 2012
7.0
USER SCORE
Generally favorable reviews based on 739 Ratings
USER RATING DISTRIBUTION
Positive:
494
Mixed:
178
Negative:
67
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3
KenmeiJul 15, 2012
This was a very disappointing movie. After seeing all of those people saying it was one of the funniest movies in a long time, I had high expectations for this movie. Being a fan of both Family Guy and American Dad, I felt very confident thatThis was a very disappointing movie. After seeing all of those people saying it was one of the funniest movies in a long time, I had high expectations for this movie. Being a fan of both Family Guy and American Dad, I felt very confident that this would be a good movie. Boy how wrong I was. I don't know why I didn't expect anything except a long episode of Family Guy but that's all this movie was in the end. The same jokes, the same cut-away style of jokes, the same everything. That would be fine if the movie was entertaining and it just wasn't. The story was terrible. The actor's were not very good and they were obviously mailing it in half the time. There were some decent moments here and there but this movie was very unoriginal and just boring most of the time. I'll stick with MacFarlane's T.V. shows from now on if this is going to be the quality of his movies. Expand
16 of 21 users found this helpful165
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4
mrmdeeJan 21, 2013
Ted is an homage to old, tired jokes and an attempt to shock its audience into liking the movie. Just like Seth McFarlane's completely unoriginal Family Guy, Ted dares its critics to lambast the movie and when they do, they are accused ofTed is an homage to old, tired jokes and an attempt to shock its audience into liking the movie. Just like Seth McFarlane's completely unoriginal Family Guy, Ted dares its critics to lambast the movie and when they do, they are accused of being "unhip" or "too sensitive." I saw this movie in the summer and enjoyed the first ten minutes of the movie, when it maintained some sense of originality. Then it devolved into an hour and a half Family Guy or American Dad episode. Each joke less memorable than the one before it. Throughout the movie I couldn't help but feel sorry for Mila Kunis. (Maybe McFarlane has something on her and blackmailed her into starring?) And Mark Wahlberg played a completely unlikable loser. You don't want him to get the girl. Teenagers and 10-year-old boys will enjoy this movie because they enjoy anything that is crass. It makes them feel older and more powerful. Maybe that's what McFarlane's motivation behind his work is? Expand
4 of 4 users found this helpful40
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3
NedRyerson1Jan 11, 2013
Ted seemed to be a good movie, although the idea is very interesting and original, because nobody could possibly think in another use for a teddy bear than a toy for a little child. The director, Seth MacFarlane, obviously used his experienceTed seemed to be a good movie, although the idea is very interesting and original, because nobody could possibly think in another use for a teddy bear than a toy for a little child. The director, Seth MacFarlane, obviously used his experience for creating this story in which a kid with no friends grows up with ted, entering both to a world of parties, sex and drugs. The problem is that the protagonist is now an adult with a girlfriend (asking for marriage) and a job, but he still has ted, with the exception that now it is promiscuous and a very bad influence. The film consists in funny situations about this couple and how it breaks with the adult world. The problem with this picture is that the jokes and situations are very weakly constructed and with the simplicity of a child. At no time this movie made me laugh, even more, I got bored. The story is poor and predictable, the performances are disgusting and the direction is awful, however how you cannot expect a complex humor from the guy who created Family Guy. Is shallow, is repetitive, is Ted-ious. Expand
2 of 2 users found this helpful20
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3
FrenchchefNov 17, 2012
The only entertaining thing for me during the entire movie was Ted mimicking voices like the Boston one. Otherwise, it's trashy comedy with bad acting. The plot was also very clique and no good.
2 of 2 users found this helpful20
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5
Andys_ReviewsMay 6, 2013
So, was it worth my while investing 106 minutes of my life on this one? I have to say, on balance; not really. Yes there are some wonderfully comic moments and smart one-liners in there but I did find it drifted far too much from the sublimeSo, was it worth my while investing 106 minutes of my life on this one? I have to say, on balance; not really. Yes there are some wonderfully comic moments and smart one-liners in there but I did find it drifted far too much from the sublime to the ridiculous. Also, one minute Ted is ‘Brian’ for Family Guy and the next he turns into ‘Peter Griffin’ from the same show (despite his denials). I thought both Mark Wahlberg and Mila Kunis did a good job; both of their characters were quite believable. Ultimately though I did find it lacked the one thing it so desperately needed; heart. Still, I’m sure the many devotees of ‘Family Guy’ will love this one but for me, sadly, it’s a bit of a dud.

SteelMonster’s verdict: NOT RECOMMENDED (…unless you’re a really big fan of Family Guy, in which case why haven’t you seen it yet!)

My score: 5.3/10
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1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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4
BunnyJan 25, 2013
The only thing 'shocking' about this movie is how lazy the writing is. Some good moments here, including a really funny bit part played by Joel McHale. Mila Kunis and Mark Wahlberg are good but they cannot carry a poor movie with a boringThe only thing 'shocking' about this movie is how lazy the writing is. Some good moments here, including a really funny bit part played by Joel McHale. Mila Kunis and Mark Wahlberg are good but they cannot carry a poor movie with a boring plot and weak jokes. The humour was base, unoriginal and just lame. If you're into racist stereotypes and fart jokes, this movie is for you. Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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6
nightblade00Feb 13, 2013
If you are a fan of Family or Judd Apatow films you will be entertained by this one. However, if you are looking for comedy gold, you should probably look elsewhere. Best enjoyed with a group of guys at least 3-4 drinks in when you turn it on.
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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7
BrandonBonaseraJan 4, 2013
Ted is a nice blend between dark and blue humour that will both amuse and offend audiences and will constantly keep them entertained with plenty of cultural references and an entertaining story-arch. Fans of Seth MacFarlane's Family Guy willTed is a nice blend between dark and blue humour that will both amuse and offend audiences and will constantly keep them entertained with plenty of cultural references and an entertaining story-arch. Fans of Seth MacFarlane's Family Guy will definitely enjoy this film, but for those who don't like Family Guy, they probably won't like it at all. Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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9
Bruce722Nov 29, 2012
Ted was maybe the funniest movie I've seen all year. Mark Wahlberg played a pretty good role but Mila Kunis and Seth MacFarlane (as Ted) steal the show. Mila is absolutely stunning as usual and MacFarlane's sense of humor is so deranged thatTed was maybe the funniest movie I've seen all year. Mark Wahlberg played a pretty good role but Mila Kunis and Seth MacFarlane (as Ted) steal the show. Mila is absolutely stunning as usual and MacFarlane's sense of humor is so deranged that you can't help but find it hilarious. This definitely isn't a movie for everyone. It's incredibly vulgar and some people might be offended by a lot of the content. Nonetheless, if you're like me and don't really care about any of that stuff, I think you'd love this movie. Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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4
csw12Feb 16, 2013
Ted is nothing more than a juvenile film with crude and mostly unfunny sex jokes. The movie is over the top punctuated by a few bright spots here and there. It seemed like Seth MacFarlane wrote down any stupid joke that came to mind and threwTed is nothing more than a juvenile film with crude and mostly unfunny sex jokes. The movie is over the top punctuated by a few bright spots here and there. It seemed like Seth MacFarlane wrote down any stupid joke that came to mind and threw it all together. Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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4
reddave2Sep 12, 2012
I'm a fan in general of the Family Guy series so I had high hopes for this, but it just never seemed to engage me. The jokes arent funny enough and the plot about the obsessed fan isnt really needed and really drags the last third of theI'm a fan in general of the Family Guy series so I had high hopes for this, but it just never seemed to engage me. The jokes arent funny enough and the plot about the obsessed fan isnt really needed and really drags the last third of the family. There are some high spots, including an excellent fight scene and a pretty funny cameo but I found myself bored and not really enjoying the film at the halfway point. Its not crude enough to be a great shock comedy and its too risque to be an enjoyable coming of age comedy and as such falls somewhere uncomfortable between. Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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4
EittenneJul 15, 2012
This movie started out well and was funny initially. It, however , dropped off 3/4 of the way through. Had to wade through the last 20 minutes.Mark Walberg did a fine job of being a bachelor that refuses to grow up with Mila Kunis being hisThis movie started out well and was funny initially. It, however , dropped off 3/4 of the way through. Had to wade through the last 20 minutes.Mark Walberg did a fine job of being a bachelor that refuses to grow up with Mila Kunis being his faithful GF trying to make him face a reality of life. Had high hopes for it from the trailers but left disappointed in the result. Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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1
Squishy05May 25, 2014
Was an okay movie I guess,, but yoh... I wish they will stop with all the Je##s and Ch###t swearing, really, you could have made the movie without it, I can't see how swearing like that makes any difference to the story whatsoever, or is thatWas an okay movie I guess,, but yoh... I wish they will stop with all the Je##s and Ch###t swearing, really, you could have made the movie without it, I can't see how swearing like that makes any difference to the story whatsoever, or is that just how everyone speaks nowadays ? Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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1
HarryNuggetsAug 31, 2012
This movie was HORRIBLE. There is nothing redeeming about it, Ted sounds like Peter of the Family Guy (Macfarlane does the voice) which is irritating enough since the same tripe comes out of the bear's mouth as Peter's. I have alwaysThis movie was HORRIBLE. There is nothing redeeming about it, Ted sounds like Peter of the Family Guy (Macfarlane does the voice) which is irritating enough since the same tripe comes out of the bear's mouth as Peter's. I have always thought Macfarlane's modus operandi is as much shock as imagination and talent, this movie proves it. I wasn't offended but insulted that someone would try to pass off something so lazy, and at times mean spirited, as a movie. I must admit I am scratching my head over critics such as Travers over at Rolling Stone claiming it's gut bustingly funny...it isn't, it's mind bendingly banal punctuated by vulgarity. Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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9
NerdConsultantDec 29, 2014
Ted is one of the funniest movies I've seen in ages with some of Seth Mcfarlen's best writing. it does what princess diaries did well in making a live action cartoon similar to his family guy and american dad shows and it works in so manyTed is one of the funniest movies I've seen in ages with some of Seth Mcfarlen's best writing. it does what princess diaries did well in making a live action cartoon similar to his family guy and american dad shows and it works in so many ways and it's great to see Mark Wahlberg in a decent movie given his track record in recent memory Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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5
arthur1nowApr 6, 2015
Un film moyen avec des personnages plutôt drôles mais ce sont les enchainement de "gags" qui sont selon moins en dessous. Dommage. Un film sans plus.
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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8
MadMaxFuryRoadJun 26, 2015
Ted is a pretty funny movie though it is not as hilarious as people say it is. It is pretty weird how a teddy bear could talk but is also really funny when he starts cussing. The movie had me laugh all the way and the ending got a lot more serious
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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8
S6220Aug 12, 2012
If you remotely like any of Seth MacFarlane's earlier work then you will love this film. Firstly, I don't think Ted could have been cast any better. Of course they used most of the family guy characters as actors in the film and it worksIf you remotely like any of Seth MacFarlane's earlier work then you will love this film. Firstly, I don't think Ted could have been cast any better. Of course they used most of the family guy characters as actors in the film and it works really well, not only is it relate-able it's hilarious. The script is rich in one-liners and hooks that keep the pace of the comedy at a perfect pace that seem to flow effortlessly through a good, solid story line. It's not genre defining, it's generic as hell. But it doesn't matter. It's slathered in enough hilarity that you simply don't care about the story. I don't really have any negative criticism for the film, the only thing I can suggest to anyone thinking about going to watch the film - don't go in expecting anything more than a comedy. It does what it says on the tin and it's hilarious. Expand
7 of 8 users found this helpful71
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5
dz9Jul 17, 2012
All I heard from this movie was "If you love Family Guy you'll love this," Family Guy being one of my favorite shows, I thought I would have a riot with Ted... but I was deeply disappointed. The main problem with Ted is that it recycles aAll I heard from this movie was "If you love Family Guy you'll love this," Family Guy being one of my favorite shows, I thought I would have a riot with Ted... but I was deeply disappointed. The main problem with Ted is that it recycles a lot of its own jokes and it relies way too heavily on toilet humor. Seeing hooker excrement just isnt that funny. The jokes aren't all bad though, there are definitely a few instances of Seth McFarlane's comedic genius with his pop culture references and parodies, but these were too few and too far apart. Another problem of the movie is its premise of a talking teddy bear.. I was "on board" with it at first, but the finale of the movie reversed the mythos and just made it seem silly and not well-thought out at all. But to the movies strengths; Mila Kunis and Mark Wahlberg were great together and a lot of the cameos did great. In the End: This feels like every other Seth McFarlane project that isn't Family Guy. It's forgettable and stupid with barely any laughs and you wish you were just watching Family Guy instead. Expand
6 of 7 users found this helpful61
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3
EludiumQ36Dec 1, 2012
At first I was psyched about "Ted" because wow, Seth McFarlane gets to unleash and it's just gotta be great right ?! Not so much. People, this is a RomCom, yep, romantic comedy. And it's totally derivative, you've seen it all before. And aAt first I was psyched about "Ted" because wow, Seth McFarlane gets to unleash and it's just gotta be great right ?! Not so much. People, this is a RomCom, yep, romantic comedy. And it's totally derivative, you've seen it all before. And a collateral effect is that it comes across as some weird offshoot of "Family Guy" because Seth's Ted character sounds like "Peter" and he does a "Stewie" too, and Mila Kunis is the voice of "Meg" so it's just weird. But look, as much as anybody I wanted to like/love this venture, but it's juvenile, disappointing, and done so many times before. Expand
4 of 5 users found this helpful41
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4
ORidenourJul 17, 2012
This movie is just an excuse for seth mcfarlane to get an uncensored version of family guy. He brought nothing new to the comedy scene and didn't even make an attempt to change his voice acting from the mainstream family guy stuff, that saidThis movie is just an excuse for seth mcfarlane to get an uncensored version of family guy. He brought nothing new to the comedy scene and didn't even make an attempt to change his voice acting from the mainstream family guy stuff, that said this could have been a great movie... if seth mcfarlane hadn't been the voice actor for one of the main characters and if he had tried to bring something new to the table instead of just reusing his same old worn out brand of humor Expand
4 of 5 users found this helpful41
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5
mdm389Jul 13, 2012
The first half is hilarious, but the movie quickly tailspins into a cliche Bromance flick in the second half, devoid of any real humor or intrigue. The difference between the two halves magnifies the latter's shortcomings even more. It's aThe first half is hilarious, but the movie quickly tailspins into a cliche Bromance flick in the second half, devoid of any real humor or intrigue. The difference between the two halves magnifies the latter's shortcomings even more. It's a shame, too, as the idea of a magical toy coming to life but never going away had so much more potential this. McFarlane's racist for the sake of being racist jokes ("look how edgy I am making jokes about Asians butchering chickens and owning gongs!") are simply stupid and not at all funny, and the fact that you are never for a moment unsure of what's happening next ruins the film's appeal.

Worth a rental, not worth a $10 theatre ticket.
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4 of 5 users found this helpful41
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7
grandpajoe6191Aug 1, 2012
I'd say "Ted"'s a OK movie. The teddy bear's got the family-guy style humor going on, which is pretty hilarious, But except for Ted, the movie isn't really that exciting; it's the teddy bear that makes the movie.
7 of 9 users found this helpful72
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8
MolniyaJul 1, 2012
If you enjoy Family Guy, you'll enjoy this movie. Ted's accent isn't quite Peter Griffin, but it's close. See how many other Family Guy voice actors you can spot. Typical MacFarlane humor.
6 of 8 users found this helpful62
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5
Psyco6Jul 13, 2012
This movie is like a family guy movie. The jokes are mostly 80's references or about pop culture,and seth even throws in a few jokes about Jews, Muslims,and Mexicans. The best part about this movie is Mila and Mark since they are the bestThis movie is like a family guy movie. The jokes are mostly 80's references or about pop culture,and seth even throws in a few jokes about Jews, Muslims,and Mexicans. The best part about this movie is Mila and Mark since they are the best actors in the movie. A few parts in the movie were funny,but a lot of the jokes were pretty dry and it something that is poorly written. So if you like the way family guy has been going then you'll like this movie. If you are expecting a funny movie that has good jokes them save your money. Expand
3 of 4 users found this helpful31
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6
barnabyjon3sJul 3, 2012
An average comedy with worn out jokes. If you are a fan of family guy and hoping to enjoy new jokes and an interesting plot don't waste your time. With the price of tickets and the other movies in theaters right now I honestly can't recommendAn average comedy with worn out jokes. If you are a fan of family guy and hoping to enjoy new jokes and an interesting plot don't waste your time. With the price of tickets and the other movies in theaters right now I honestly can't recommend seeing this. You have heard the jokes before and the fact that Ted is a Teddy bear wears off quickly. Ryan Reynolds gave a couple of laughs but that was about the only thing that sent the theater into an uproar. I was expecting better. It wasn't a terrible movie. It was entertaining but I would wait to torrent/rent/Netflix this movie. Expand
3 of 4 users found this helpful31
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8
RoscoAug 1, 2012
Seth MacFarlane's big screen debut comes in the form of Ted. As a fan of his work I was definetly looking forward to this. And largely, it's hilarious! Ted is definetly the comedy of the summer, infact very possibly of the year. The filmSeth MacFarlane's big screen debut comes in the form of Ted. As a fan of his work I was definetly looking forward to this. And largely, it's hilarious! Ted is definetly the comedy of the summer, infact very possibly of the year. The film itself begins with a young John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg), a lonely child who upon receiving a teddy bear for his Christmas wishes he could talk. The next morning, John's wish comes true and Ted (Seth MacFarlane) can indeed talk and briefly becomes a celebrity. The film picks up in the modern day where John and Ted are living in Boston. Both, however are still childish, immature and spend most of the time smoking pot! John is also in a four-year relationship with the stunning Lori (Mila Kunis). During their anniversary Lori reveals that she wants more from their relationship but feels they can't move on with Ted around. This tests John's friendship to maximum as he tries to maintain his relationship with Lori and keep his bromance intact with Ted. It results in a fantastically funny comedy. It may seem juvenile but believe me Ted has a lot on offer! Wahlberg and MacFarlane nail the chemistry between their characters as they bounce of each other wonderfully well. Mila Kunis isn't just the eye candy as she fits in perfectly to MacFarlane's witty world of comedy once again. Ted is often hilarious and at times very rated-R, however not all the time, it's largely hit but does have a few misses along the way. What makes the film even more appealing is that at the heart of it is a tale of friendship, love and loyalty. Definetly the must see comedy of the summer and one that is throughly enjoyable throughout! MacFarlane's debut is hilariously impressive , if slightly drawn out but it all pays off in the end. So much so you may find yourself singing a certain Thunder Song the next time a bit of thunder is on the horizon. Dynamite! Expand
4 of 6 users found this helpful42
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8
EiiteDonkeyJul 4, 2012
This Movie was hilarious, humor is little inappropriate but thats Seth Macfarlane. If you like Family Guy, you'll love this movie. Similar comedy style and jokes. The story line is a little strange, but makes sense in the end.
4 of 6 users found this helpful42
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8
Tbrown15Jul 7, 2012
Ted, is vulgar, dirty, funny, smart and mostly entertaining. How is this not a masterpiece in comedy land. well, towards the end of the film, Ted becomes a little to dull with the jokes, with the extremely loud laughs become chuckles. The 3rdTed, is vulgar, dirty, funny, smart and mostly entertaining. How is this not a masterpiece in comedy land. well, towards the end of the film, Ted becomes a little to dull with the jokes, with the extremely loud laughs become chuckles. The 3rd act is a little weak, with the first two acts being wildly entertaining. Overall, Ted has some very laugh-out loud moments that will make you want to cry, and instantly becomes one of the funnier films of 2012. My girlfriend and I had a blast seeing this film, and absolutely enjoyed the film. Ted, is one outrageous comedy. Expand
2 of 3 users found this helpful21
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1
Charles_PetersoJul 21, 2012
Slams on low wage earning men, while praise's unmarried whor....Only some out of touch rich Hollywood scum could create this this monstrosity. Here's to losing more money in the near future!!!!!
2 of 3 users found this helpful21
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