| 75 |
San Francisco Chronicle
Like every other action movie, it's designed for a 14-year-old boy's mentality, but it's enjoyable enough to turn most people into 14-year-old boys.
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| 70 |
Salon.com
The Scorpion King, so far from perfect it isn't funny, is nevertheless one of those movies that catches you up in something bigger than yourself, namely, an archetypal desire to enjoy good trash every now and then.
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| 70 |
Variety
Rouses excitement mostly from stuntwork and thesp agility rather than CGI excess.
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| 70 |
LA Weekly
Director Chuck Russell ("The Mask") keeps the computer effects to a minimum, emphasizing instead the essential ingredients of a Saturday-afternoon serial, namely, venom-tipped arrows, pissed-off cobras and a buxom babe.
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| 70 |
New Times (L.A.)
Chuck Russell doesn't make masterpieces -- he makes good B movies ("The Mask," "The Blob"), and The Scorpion King more than ably meets those standards.
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| 63 |
New York Daily News
Has been fine-tuned for adolescent boys, from the hectic pace right down to the way Cassandra's breasts are always barely draped.
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| 63 |
Chicago Sun-Times
Here is a movie that embraces its goofiness like a Get Out of Jail Free card.
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| 60 |
Chicago Reader
Within the limitations of the genre, the film succeeds fairly well, with enough giddy sophomoric humor, stunning fights, titillating sex, and exotic sets and costumes to keep an audience entertained.
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| 60 |
Film Threat
David Grove
The film is dumb, formulaic, the other actors are scarcely worth mentioning, and the plot is merely an excuse to set up the action scenes. But it didn’t bore me; The Rock is ceaselessly entertaining.
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| 60 |
Los Angeles Times
The movie itself is a live-action cartoon, a fast-moving and cheerfully simplistic 88 minutes of exaggerated action put together with the preteen boy in mind.
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| 58 |
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
The Rock manages to play both with a crude candor more genuine than the entertaining if contrived spectacle around him, and a surprising big-screen charisma and ease that makes him a natural-born screen hero.
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| 58 |
Entertainment Weekly
Isn't incompetent; it's just plodding and obvious. If anything holds it together, it's The Rock's ironic ability to tread lightly, which the movie is neither fast nor inventive enough to recognize as different from the spirit of Arnold.
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| 50 |
Boston Globe
For a movie with such a misplaced sense of history, The Scorpion King seems afraid to have more fun with its own stupidity.
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| 50 |
Miami Herald
The good news about The Scorpion King is that The Rock turns out to be a charismatic, ingratiating screen presence.
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| 50 |
ReelViews
It is possible to make an engaging action/adventure picture of this sort, but The Scorpion King isn't it. The movie isn't godawful, but it's far from inspired, and, as I sat through its 90 minute running length, I found my mind wandering.
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| 50 |
The Onion (A.V. Club)
Prototypical summer-movie fare, designed to be consumed, enjoyed, and forgotten all at once.
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| 50 |
TV Guide
It's impossible to overstate how deeply dumb all of this is, but it skims along at a brisk clip and manages not to overdo the nudge-nudge, wink-wink humor.
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| 50 |
USA Today
Of course, The Rock looks the part, though with a headband and buckskin, he'd also look like Tonto on steroids.
|
| 50 |
Chicago Tribune
A dumb movie, but it's also a knowing one: a cheap castle of lewd trivia and corny excitement built on The Rock.
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| 50 |
Charlotte Observer
The Rock isn't always comfortable delivering dialogue. He's handsome, physically sculpted and farther along dramatically than Arnold Schwarzenegger in "Conan the Barbarian," but he's still learning the simple acting skills an action hero needs.
|
| 50 |
The Globe and Mail (Toronto)
The style here is much more in the spirit of the smash and slash of the Conan movies than the banter and computer-generated monsters of the Mummy movies.
|
| 40 |
Wall Street Journal
Predictably dumber than its predecessors, though that shouldn't get in the way of its profitability.
|
| 38 |
Baltimore Sun
Plays like Abbott and Costello Meet Conan the Barbarian.
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| 33 |
Portland Oregonian
Bang-bang, kiss-kiss, yawn-yawn. While dull death metal churns on the soundtrack, Johnson engages in one big brawl after another.
|
| 30 |
Washington Post
Ultimately undone by its sheer busyness. The screenwriters never get the story to settle down, and it becomes a case of one damn thing after another.
|
| 30 |
Village Voice
Director Chuck Russell lacks the visual panache, the comic touch, and perhaps the budget of Sommers's title-bout features, which refined a historically grounded B-movie sensibility into pure, gasp-inducing entertainment.
|
| 30 |
Washington Post
Dan Via
The movie doesn't stink exactly, but it comes dispiritingly close.
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| 25 |
New York Post
Unfortunately, Scorpion King has none of the qualities -- epic sweep, relative originality and heartfelt bloodthirstiness -- that made "Conan" so trashily entertaining.
|
| 20 |
Austin Chronicle
For all the swords 'n' sandals hoodoo that makes up the wilting backbone of Jonathan Hale's script, the Rock is, nevertheless, fun to keep an eye on.
|
| 10 |
The New York Times
As this chaotic barrage of muscle flexing, swordplay, fireballs, crude digital effects and comic-book quips hurls itself off the screen, it's like having several garbage cans clogged with stale pizza, lukewarm cola, soggy French fries and greasy, ketchup-stained napkins emptied over your head.
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