Absolute Games' Scores

  • Games
For 695 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 23% higher than the average critic
  • 5% same as the average critic
  • 72% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 10 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Game review score: 63
Highest review score: 95 Valkyria Chronicles
Lowest review score: 1 FlatOut 3: Chaos & Destruction
Score distribution:
695 game reviews
    • 36 Metascore
    • 28 Critic Score
    Grey’s Anatomy: TVG is an interactive novel where nothing depends on the player. The choice is but illusion. An actor says a few lines, makes an appropriate face, and the story resumes its course. Cue 200 more scenes of cel-shaded doctors phoning it in.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 28 Critic Score
    The final level of the game is a giant trash dump. Very symbolic, because it's hard to find a more suitable place for Dead Horde itself.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 27 Critic Score
    There is no connection between the actual investigation and actions of our zit-faced detectives. Horrendous dialogue, complete with the “American dream” philosophy, syrupy jokes about prepubescent love, and tear-jerking lectures of the characters, only widens this gap.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 27 Critic Score
    Zombies in jungle and abandoned temples – that’s a nice setup for a Left 4 Dead campaign. Unfortunately, Rebellion is not Valve. “Repeatedly press button on-screen to survive torture”, says a hint message during one of the interactive cutscenes. Oh I wish there was a button to erase Shellshock 2 from my memory.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Eight hours of sheer boredom spread over a few equally gray (in all senses) levels.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Paradox Interactive still cannot produce a decent third-party game (see also: Majesty 2, Sword of the Stars 2, Magicka).
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    It's not a game – just a prototype of one. And they charge money for that?!
    • 64 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    The main character of Inquisitor is quite creative when it comes to torturing heretics. You can rack people, make them drink boiling water, or put them into the iron maiden… But the game itself is an even worse torture – not everyone can suffer through 100 hours being bored and annoyed at the same time. Inquisitor is not a hardcore RPG; it just hates the player.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 24 Critic Score
    Deep Black is oozing with disregard towards players. I don't know why people of BiArt Studio hate the world so much, but they finally took their vengeance on it.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 23 Critic Score
    You walk about dark rooms, straining your eyes to discern doors from walls, rotate valves, kill hordes of zombies, mercenaries, robots… and pray that this level will be the last.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 22 Critic Score
    “If nothing helps, change your tactics”, reads one of the game’s loading tips. I have a better suggestion: change the game as soon as possible.
    • 59 Metascore
    • 22 Critic Score
    Even if you watched Avatar two or three times, don’t expect to enjoy the familiar world in the game. Better save the money for the DVD.
    • 20 Metascore
    • 21 Critic Score
    How to lose friends and make everyone hate you? Here’s a recipe “from Vivendi”: kill a good publisher, take one of its classic adventure franchises, give it to the creators of Worms, spend all money on Hollywood talent voice-overs, and hope for a profit.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Trash. There is no other word for Gothic 3: Forsaken Gods. Not only this expansion is buggy and horribly designed, it's simply useless.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Virtual Dick Marcinko said it best: “Dead piece of sh.t!”
    • 56 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Fans of Shrek will be better off watching the movie or replaying Shrek SuperSlam – the best game about the green ogre to date. Fans of platformers, better look elsewhere.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Black Lion took a bite of something that they could now chew – a tactical stealth action game. And instead of a generic by-the-numbers shooter, they spewed out a piece of garbage, complete with poor graphics, amoeba-like AI and a horrendously dumb story.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    A soulless movie tie-in.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 18 Critic Score
    The worst thing about JASF is not that it's an unrealistic arcade game. It's just very, very boring.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 13 Critic Score
    The Rockin' Dead looks like a byproduct of someone's failed attempt to master 3ds Max.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 10 Critic Score
    1.5 Gbytes of data. 10 US dollars. 45 minutes of gameplay. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new winner for the title of the shortest commercially available first-person shooter. You've seen the bad movie – now play a crappy game.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 5 Critic Score
    I couldn't shake off the feeling that I was playing a game made by a bunch of school students.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 3 Critic Score
    It’s not a game, but three hours of torture, complete with broken scripts and frequent crashes.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 1 Critic Score
    Tunnel Rats reeks of cruftsmanship and couldn’t-care-less attitude of its makers. Ugly, boring, and vulgar, this amateurish game is a true Uwe Boll product.
    • 23 Metascore
    • 1 Critic Score
    This game is not just boring – it's disgusting to play.