Miami Herald's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
For 2,965 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 50% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 47% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 0.7 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 61
Highest review score: 100 The Untouchables
Lowest review score: 0 Teen Wolf Too
Score distribution:
2,965 movie reviews
  1. Don't expect perfection, and you'll emerge from this goofy movie all in one piece, with reasonably entertained kids and a milder headache.
  2. The film is so gleefully ridiculous that you start to suspect the filmmakers were in on the joke and forgot to tell the actors.
  3. Silly, overplotted conspiracy thriller.
    • Miami Herald
  4. The original rock songs on the soundtrack, which are supposed to make Lestat ''bigger than Elvis,'' are terrible -- a common challenge for movies about fictional musicians.
  5. The movie is a clumsy and uninspired mess, which is not to say that it's not funny.
  6. It is a grim and monotonous affair despite the overkill of bad guys -- a trio of evil spirits plus a bonus serial killer -- mixed with a few cheap shocks futilely intended to make the audience jump.
  7. The guys are more amusing than not, and they display the easy chemistry of real-life pals.
  8. This is a slight and unessential picture, but its quirky, compassionate tone seems destined to attract a cult following, and members of high-school drama clubs everywhere will be riveted.
  9. He's (Sandler) trying to clone himself by supporting his buddies in making low-budget, high-grossing -- in all senses of the word -- formula films just like his own.
    • Miami Herald
  10. Better than you might expect despite its awkward, slow beginning, drawing you in gradually and paying off in surprisingly effective and bittersweet ways.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    Not as bad a movie as it sounds, just mediocre.
  11. The germ of a better film lies in that joke, but Schaeffer doesn't quite dig it out. Instead, we get painfully unfunny scenes that make us think that when it comes to writing comedy, Schaeffer should stick to his own rule: never again.
  12. So lazy and rote, it feels like a rerun the first time you watch it.
  13. Who writes this stuff, anyway? Does this not sound like utter gibberish? Surely, this film did not actually get made, did it? Yes, it did. I have seen it. But you, oh, fortunate one, don't have to. Consider yourself lucky.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 63 Critic Score
    Everything that cynical moviegoers despise and the tender-minded adore.
  14. The set design of Thirteen Ghosts may have been expensive, but its thrills are cheap.
  15. Annie DeSalvo, a first-time director and screenwriter, can't escape the made-for-TV feel but does manage to give her cast, mostly once-big names fallen from grace and popularity, flashes of humanity between lessons about various saints and sermons disguised as dialogue.
    • Miami Herald
  16. Shameless in its desperate grab at the heartstrings.
  17. Premonition is actually more daring than you might expect. Not bold enough to be memorable, maybe, but just enough to keep you from falling asleep in front of the TV.
  18. The movie is pure product, and proud of it: There isn't a single surprising moment in all of its 88 minutes, because Domestic Disturbance is designed to stick to tried-and-true formulas, instead of shaking them up a little.
  19. The ghastly first half of this romantic comedy -- is as close to unwatchable as any moment in "Bride Wars." The fact that it stars Renée Zellweger just makes it harder to bear.
  20. Gas -- the hot air variety -- is exactly what Driven is made of.
    • Miami Herald
  21. Pretentious, perplexing and plain rock-dumb movie.
    • Miami Herald
    • 29 Metascore
    • 38 Critic Score
    Too inert to be titillating, too generic to be engaging.
  22. If watching people having their faces cut off, getting their legs amputated and having their throats tenderly slit is your idea of a horrific good time, you'll certainly get your money's worth here.
  23. How High is not a particularly good movie, but then again it's not trying to be. It's a project by two B-list rappers seeking to extend their music careers in the way of stars like Will Smith, Ice Cube and Tupac Shakur.
    • Miami Herald
  24. May be among the most excruciating mainstream movies to spew forth from Hollywood in years.
    • Miami Herald
    • 29 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Too small to be a spectacle, too humorless to take seriously and too stupid to pass muster at a middle school writing workshop.
  25. It's a formula and hard to describe as good in any artistic sense, but the viewers who pay to see it -- and many, many people are going to -- will get exactly what they want.
  26. Fool's Gold isn't so much a film as an opportunity to pay homage to Matthew McConaughey's impressive physique.
  27. According to legend, a silver bullet can kill a werewolf. Too bad it can't slay bad writing, without which the ill-conceived Red Riding Hood would not exist.
  28. Just My Luck is way too long for such a slight premise, and Lohan, so appealing in Mean Girls, is years too young for the part.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 63 Critic Score
    A Disney family film, with all that the term implies: It's playful, corny, silly, adventuresome and enjoyable.
    • Miami Herald
  29. Sweet but colossally dull relationship movie.
    • Miami Herald
  30. You Again is at its funniest in the early scenes, when everyone is pretending all is well beneath forced smiles and plotting eyes.
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    It's never a good sign when a movie's credits include: ''Tony Orlando as himself.'' But the crooner is the highlight of the dreadful Waking Up in Reno.
  31. There's only one excuse for the sentimental and ham-handed I Am Sam, and it's not to tout the rights of the mentally disabled.
    • Miami Herald
  32. A garish clashing of sacred images and bloody semihorror, this is a movie that defines the category: interesting failure.
    • Miami Herald
    • 28 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Coincidentally, this is the second movie in two weeks about a haunted seafaring vessel ("Below" is the other), and if you see just one, this shouldn't be it.
  33. Nobel Son is not good. Nor is it bad. It exists, instead, somewhere in the middle ground of interesting enough to hold one's attention without actually providing any fresh, sensible or nonderivative developments.
  34. Timeline gives Gigli serious competition for worst film of the year honors.
  35. Lee remains a superb entertainer -- like Oliver Stone, he's incapable of ever being boring -- but in She Hate Me, he comes dangerously close to seeming trivial, a crank-for-crank's-sake.
  36. Berliner deserves something better, as do all the actors -- even Moore, who's starting to look very interesting and European.
  37. The sloppy charms of Just Married don't exactly break new ground, but they don't make you want to swear off romantic comedy forever, and in these "Maid in Manhattan" days that's saying something.
  38. This excruciatingly dumb, formulaic picture, which somehow required the work of four screenwriters but contains not even one single, fleeting moment of wit or humor.
  39. The Ugly Truth is insulting to women, men and even goldfish.
  40. Time to give the shoot-’em-up thing a rest, guys: It’s tired and played out, and so are you.
  41. Unfortunately, this dimwit concept barely has enough spark to power a single strand of Christmas lights, much less rival the classic-by-comparison "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" in side-splitting Yuletide snafus.
  42. It really is terrible the way films are being marketed to teens. They deserve decent movies, but instead they get glop like Head Over Heels. There ought to be a law.
    • Miami Herald
  43. Embarrassingly shoddy film.
  44. The enigma of Reeves, sort of a human black hole on screen, works well in "The Matrix" but it drains the life from weepy romance.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 63 Critic Score
    Look beyond the perfunctory dinosaur flatulence jokes, and Viva Rock Vegas is really quite sweet and clever.
    • Miami Herald
  45. Now here's the reason America won't love Garfield: The Movie: Garfield's gone from the listless feline we all know and love to a fast-stepping, break-dancing cat about town. What's worse, the other characters are even farther from their roots.
  46. Frothy as it is, SATC2 is best when it's about the women, not the wardrobe.
  47. Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker are supposed to pass for a married couple, but they have all the chemistry of two actors who just met and shook hands moments before the cameras rolled. They don't even seem to like each other much.
  48. Young girls are the only ones likely to enjoy this vapid road-trip movie.
  49. There is humor in the familiar just waiting to be rehashed for new generations, and A Guy Thing surely isn't the last stupid leave-'em-at-the-altar film we're likely to see.
  50. Winds up suffocating you with its aura of bogus, store-bought nostalgia.
    • Miami Herald
  51. Silly, tedious, inept disaster.
  52. Wild Hogs is a paint-by-numbers comedy, borrowing most of its broad strokes from sitcoms, and not clever ones like "The Office" and 3"0 Rock," either.
  53. The bar scenes do make for a great, although brief, package.
    • Miami Herald
  54. It's not every movie that makes you wish Vin Diesel would run in and start blowing up stuff.
  55. There isn't a moment in the entire picture in which you will recognize an element of your own life.
  56. If this is magic, I'll take "Gigli."
  57. Its failure to be extraordinary is thus all the more cutting, and its redundancy all the more unforgivable.
  58. Although there's no denying the threadbare nature of the script, watching Murphy riff can be a formidable entertainment on its own.
  59. Never achieves takeoff.
  60. Sitting through Little Fockers is a soul-sucking, dispiriting experience.
  61. There are jokes in this story of a 7-year-old adoptee from Heck, but most of them are funny despite the clumsiness of their telling. The rest aren't funny at all. [1 Aug 1990, p.D7]
    • Miami Herald
  62. Twisted is a movie so derivative it's hard to pinpoint exactly how many other thrillers it poaches from.
  63. The search for true love is the backbone of romantic comedy as well as the lifeblood of match.com, but this film's clumsy, completely inauthentic portrayal of it is handled in a shockingly tedious fashion.
  64. This is the kind of colossally misguided vanity project.
  65. Every character is quirky, and each has a schtick.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    In its favor, the film's production values raise the standard of usual Christian entertainment. Sadly, though, it preaches to the choir.
  66. This utter waste of time has next-to-nothing to do with the infinitely wittier golden-age National Lampoon movies.
  67. Few expected Basic Instinct 2 to be very good, but no one expected it to be this boring.
  68. Amusing at times but never more than a modest diversion, lacking the cleverness and imagination required to turn it into more than a one-joke movie.
  69. For anyone who digs hardcore motorcycle racing, Supercross delivers enough engine-revving, dirt-spewing motorcross action to satisfy even the most intense adrenaline craving.
  70. Filmmaker Christopher Cain has turned a national tragedy into a teen romance, and not in a grand, entertaining, "Titanic" way.
  71. The formulae of gal-next-door and big game are followed so slavishly that it's hard to laugh at Teen Wolf even on the rare moments when it is original. The script and the direction are simply too lazy, too contemptuous even of adolescent audiences. [24 Aug 1985, p.C5]
    • Miami Herald
  72. Corny? You bet. But it also proves surprisingly inviting -- for a while, anyway.
    • Miami Herald
  73. When one actor plays both hero and villain, the viewer knows that what is being shown is not an authentic dance.
  74. Georgia Rule is so artificial, it feels like more of a flow chart than a slice of life.
  75. The fact that License to Wed isn't as unbearable as its trailers make it look doesn't mean it's good. It's not. It's just another mediocre addition -- worse than the best sitcoms, better than the worst.
  76. Has a made-for-TV smallness (it will probably be a big hit on cable), and it never quite vanquishes the nagging suspicion that you could be spending your time better elsewhere.
    • Miami Herald
  77. The dumbest, most risible retelling ever made of the exploits of legendary bank robber Jesse James.
  78. A fluffy, feel-bad drama, with some serious things to say about the viability of homosexual men as fathers and role models.
  79. The sort of entertainment that makes you happy to be grown up and able to avoid the current onslaught of trite, lazy, unimaginative films aimed at tween-agers.
  80. Tale is anything but spellbinding.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    The entire story -- has been done before, and should have been limited to a 30-minute Saturday morning cartoon episode.
  81. Could there be a more inappropriate time to release a cheesy horror movie about evildoing in Louisiana.
  82. No atmosphere, no tension -- nothing but Costner, flailing away. It's a buggy drag.
  83. The problem with Revolver is that it is Ritchie's first attempt at a ''serious'' look at the underworld, but the result is so pretentious and muddled it's almost a little embarrassing.
  84. Frenetic, maddening, exhilarating, ridiculous, fascinating farce of an action-comedy-thriller-mystery-whatever.
    • Miami Herald
  85. Abduction is a crass and lowbrow attempt to cash in on a young actor's heat - an exploitation picture where the person being taken advantage of is too young to notice.
  86. It's a cannibalization of "Sleeping With the Enemy," a not-so-good Julia Roberts film, with a ridiculous female-empowerment subtext and a relentlessly stupid script that goes nowhere you can't predict before the opening credits roll.
  87. Anyone who wants to enjoy himself at a good movie about a high school geek who undergoes a transformation should go see "'Spider-Man" again instead.
  88. Surprisingly sweet and, dare we say it, old-fashioned, with an engaging sense of humor that's a definite improvement on lame, lowbrow efforts such as "Little Nicky."
  89. An insipid comedy in which the women are shallow, acquisitive, backstabbing, selfish harridans.
  90. A sad and rote exercise in milking a played-out idea -- a straight guy has to dress up in drag -- that shockingly manages to be even worse than its title would imply.

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