New York Magazine (Vulture)'s Scores

For 1,753 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 44% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 54% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 0.8 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 62
Highest review score: 100 The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Lowest review score: 0 The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)
Score distribution:
1,753 movie reviews
  1. Orgy, hell: The film is like a nightmare in which you're trapped in an arcade with screens on all sides and no eyelids. Based on an elemental but happily streamlined Japanese cartoon (an anime precursor), it's an eyesore, a shambles, with incoherent action and ear-buckling dialogue.
  2. You really have to screw it up to dishonor the memory of a movie as shitty as the original "Friday the 13th." Heads should roll.
  3. Ridley Scott’s Robin Hood is a pompous, interminable hash.
  4. He (Perry) has taken Shange's landmark poem cycle for seven African-American actresses, cut it up, and sewn its bloody entrails into a tawdry, masochistic soap opera that exponentially ups the "Precious" ante.
  5. Dr. Seuss's The Lorax [sic] isn't Seussian in spirit. It's shrill and campy and stuffed with superfluous characters.
  6. Veering between tonal and narrative extremes, it's the kind of film that makes you long for the grim pomposity of something like "Signs."
  7. Butter essentially eats its own premise, then proceeds to bludgeon us with unfunny, unoriginal political satire.
  8. It offers a deranged hodgepodge of tones and acting styles and strange mannerisms and affectations and narrative dead ends that feels like it was assembled by a committee of bipolar extraterrestrials.
  9. Sinister did something I thought would be impossible: It made this lifelong horror freak abhor horror movies.
  10. A Good Day to Die Hard is the opposite of a labor of love. It has no good lines, no crackerjack fights, and only one mildly orgasmic revenge killing. It will satisfy no one — high-, low-, or middlebrow. Die Hard is finally in its death throes.
  11. Turgid, unfunny catastrophe.
  12. Appalling in ways that you could never have anticipated. The movie mixes mismatched-buddy high jinks with scenes of carnage.
  13. The carnage (with its computer-­generated splatter) is meant to be campy fun, but it’s so offhand that there’s less suspense than in an Austin Powers movie.
  14. A wan little neo-noir whose intricacies inspire more tedium than suspense, The Bag Man is a good example of how to waste a solid cast.
  15. A Haunted House 2 is not a movie. It is a nervous breakdown.
  16. The film is filled with actors you want to see -- just not in this thing.
  17. Here’s a good rule of thumb: Any movie featuring a quote in its ad from the poet laureate of Great Britain—“Deeply engaging!” -- is in trouble.
  18. 8MM
    Wallows in its own muck.
  19. If you were expecting Ritchie to discover something in Madonna that no one else has, something like, say, acting talent, forget it.
  20. Has a terrific premise that shatters almost upon arrival; no bad-boy legend trashing a hotel room could have done a more complete job.
  21. Is it possible none of these actors read the script before they signed on? Were New Line executives perhaps too hung up on hobbits to notice how whacked out this movie is?
  22. Isn't scary, funny-scary, or even just plain funny.
  23. Again and again the killers linger sadistically over the dead or dying bodies of the people they've dispatched. Did Carnahan think these sickening scenes would give Smokin' Aces a moral complexity that's generally absent from this genre? I think they make the picture seem even more morally bankrupt.
  24. What I experienced was a lot of fetid experimental-film folderol perfumed by Chopin nocturnes on the soundtrack.
  25. Even if the film were well done, it would still be a travesty.
  26. Apollo 18, isn't egregiously inept. It just never lives. It's 80 minutes of dead air.
  27. Love it or hate it, Milius's original Red Dawn looks like an Akira Kurosawa masterpiece next to this latest iteration, directed by Dan Bradley.
  28. The whole thing seems ill-conceived from the start, unable to keep its parameters simple – think of Ghostbusters and “Don’t cross the streams!” – but also lacking any genuine comic spark or imagination. It’s an exhausting 98 minute ride to nowhere.
  29. I don’t know, maybe it worked as theater. Onscreen, it’s torture.
  30. It’s actually worse than the 1981 Franco Zeffirelli–Brooke Shields version — which is worse than being waterboarded but at least bears some resemblance to the book and its brilliantly addled ‘70s vibe.

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