Neo Contra isn’t a terrible game; it simply fails to get the balance between running and gunning right, resting far too much emphasis on the latter. It’s fun for a quick blast, but doesn’t offer enough depth or difficulty to warrant extended play.

The only gem left to shine through the rubble of this collapsed concept is the character Clochette. The desperate melodrama in her voice fits this prissy madam perfectly and she, along with the plot-twist that her arc of the story entails, provides the only real highlight of the story.

There are around ten hours in the single player mode, but it begins to grate after the first. Chances are the remaining time will be spent purely to earn some 360 Achievement Points. Entertainment? Tedium.

As it stands, FF:S isn’t the worst game you’ll ever play, but it certainly isn’t worth spending money on.

All in all whilst looking great on the surface, scratching a little deeper reveals some flaws, with Bounty Hounds feeling more like a tech demo that has been turned into a game rather than a game in its own right.

Although Tenkaichi does offer genuine enjoyment, if only briefly, it comes as small consolation for the relative merits of recent prequels, and while eager young gamers will be enthused, those looking for a more brain-busting and evolutionary experience shouldn’t expect too much.

Even more irritating are the recoveries that actually need to be manipulated. One requires you to shout into the microphone to wake your character up, and another to blow into the microphone to clear the screen of fog.

You should buy this game only if you like stabbing your hands with bits of glass like Batman does in Arkham Asylum. Either that, or you’re fairly confident the PSP’s build quality will ensure it surviving forehead-screen interface.

It's just that both DS owners and Worms fans deserve so much more than a bog standard port. Open Warfare lacks the developer effort and imagination that could have made it a Worms game to remember. Instead it offers the bare minimum that you would expect.

Whilst "Super Puzzle Fighter" is still a great game, the poor multiplayer options mean that you are better off with one of versions previously released on the home consoles, or one of HD versions making their way to PS3, 360 and PC later this year.

Unfortunately Vegas continues the spiral of descent for the franchise, and moves the series further away from what made it such a success in the first place.

Not matter the hyperbole, Army of Two is a single player game that has been hastily dressed up for co-op.

Children of Mana is ideal as a pick-up-and-play game, if you fancy a quick whizz through a monster-inhabited tower or two, maybe on the bus or train. But playing it at length feels like the most tedious, level grinding and repetitive waste of time, particularly when you consider that the DS has so much more to offer in terms of RPG actioners.

It’s unfortunate that so much of the game world is so irredeemably broken.

Although there are a few clever mini-game ideas worth seeing, overall it will not hold your interest for long, which is disappointing since the whole concept of using the DS touch screen to control your way around the kitchen seems so natural. [JPN Import]

The game can also be scored for a winsome budget price, which means that it isn’t too much of a kick to the nads if you fail to get to grips with the dodgy controls and limited wares on offer.

While the eight-player party mode delivers plenty of short-term fun with friends and family, the lack of traditional modes and tightened controls hurt Bust-A-Move Bash! in the long run.

It’s certainly fun in short bursts and does provide some interesting mental exercise, but this more of a GCSE than a degree.

Velvet Assassin is a primitive and basic game even by last-gen standards.

In terms of its game mechanics Duels of the Planeswalkers is a great conversion of the card game with an excellent interface in place, but unfortunately the heart and soul of the game have been torn out. What’s left is just a shell of the Magic experience; it looks and sounds like Magic, but has little of the depth, challenge and satisfaction that the physical version offers.

With Final Fantasy XII being such a revolution to the series, creating the series’ best battle system in the process, Final Fantasy XIII feels like a massive backwards step.

Cute and the Mario theme is well applied, with lots of familiar elements from games throughout the series, but fun soon gives way to pure frustration and the whole affair is over far too quickly. [JPN Import]

Disposable amusement; if you want to experience an immediate, reassuringly predictable FPS then you may find elements to enjoy here.

The maddening frustration created by playing what could best be described as a half-finished game with huge potential will lead to a brief dalliance following which most gamers will seek their driving entertainment elsewhere.

Despite the more comprehensive set of drawn out challenges, it doesn't have the long-term appeal and playability of that title, or the "charm" of "DOAXBV's" well-established character roster.

Despite the gesture of configurable weight distributions, however, the bikes still feel both twitchy and clumsy. Opponent AI is more tempered than before, but few gamers will stay long enough to perfect their grasp of the games flawed mechanics.

Largely missed opportunity. Those who loved the original for its setting and style will be disappointed and put off by the direction the series has taken.

What was shaping up conceptually to have been the definitive Batman game to date, simply ends up being little more than a disappointing cash-in, complete with spoiler-laden (and bafflingly unskippable) clips of the movie between levels, film trailers, and even some unlockable costumes for good measure.

A game that runs out of steam far too quickly for its own good. What begins as an intriguing and fun game rapidly goes downhill.

An adventurous trip to the seaside arcade would be more rewarding than this.

One of the most disappointing sequels in gaming history.

Its tricks are old and it offers no challenge but for the irksome nuisances of its design. [JPN Import]

Practically every element of the finished product feels half-hearted and incomplete. The action is fast and furious, but falls short on entertainment value. Presentation is mediocre at best. [JPN Import]

Like the game’s aiming, Killzone misses the mark by a mile. Afflicted with so many niggling problems it has ended up a shambles of game which barely delivers on any front.

Lunar: DS really is held back by its design. Parts that should be kept simple have been made frustratingly complicated, whilst others that could use a little elaboration have been left far too basic, all these decisions seemingly being made for the sake of producing a game that’s a little different.

People wanting a game to get their teeth into will certainly find it a challenge although many will also be tearing their hair out by the handful. The one question on many people’s lips is why port Warrior Within, of all the games in the Prince of Persia trilogy? Why not simply begin with Sands of Time and start at the beginning.

With a few adjustments this could have been something special. As is, it's a bland, archaic mess.

When it comes down to it, there’s essentially nothing here to recommend this over any other game, for example, something like WarioWare. That game has character, is constantly funny and contains a great selection of fun minigames. Hot Pixel fails to deliver on all counts.

Being blunt, Kane and Lynch: Dead Men is a sickly mess of a game with the multitude of negatives undermining every positive.

A simplified take on breakdancing, with larger than life characters, a more stylized approach and better rewards for the player could have been a proper hoot. As it is, you would be better off avoiding this and acting wild in the comfort of your own home if you fancy getting your yerks on.

Again the game features multiplayer over Live, but suffers from very few people playing online and is solely populated by prepubescents with limited vocabularies that consist of nothing but insults.

Forget what you have heard about this being a title that will “train” you how to use your new hardware - it doesn’t. You can learn much more with the in-bundle magnificence of Wii Sports, or the genuine innovation offered by Wario Ware. Let’s hope that more consideration is put into future first party releases of this ilk.

Granted the game looks and sounds great, but it has no substance to it.

At World's End does pay tribute to the movie on which it is based, but it's difficult to find much here to make this game anything other than an average hack and slash adventure. PotC proves once again, that movie tie-in games are very rarely worth the amount of money thrown at them.

Viking: Battle for Asgard falls too far below the benchmark set by those that have gone before.

For people with DSs, there are at least ten better rhythm games on the system, and for Guitar Hero fans, this is nothing but pointless.

Any serious puzzler would be strongly advised to look elsewhere for their fix.

With such a distinct lack of understanding of the genre and almost hateful disregard for the player's enjoyment, the biggest crime going down in Tokyo, it seems, is a simple lack of respect.

A fairly awful experience with just a literal handful of inspired moments, and since these moments are so heavily scripted, you are better off just watching videos of it instead. [JPN Import]

Could've been fun, but ends up being more annoying than Mario Van Peebles. At least in the original version of that particularly sad little movie, he gave us the pleasure of having the good grace to die.

The use of the third dimension with a few of the special weapons is a bright point in what is mostly an uninspired, placid and, in the main, perplexing experience.

Not only do games such as "Dynamite Deka" and the even more ancient "Captain Commando" roundly trounce this apology for a beat 'em up, even "Target: Renegade" on the Spectrum gives it a run for its money. Risible.

Even a budget price point can’t counteract the tedium that quickly sets in from the limited gameplay.

Let it be made perfectly clear, FIFA 06: Road to the World Cup is the Xbox 360’s turkey.

A shocking effort, then, and one of the more memorable disasters in recent games history.

Instead of creating the game they promised themselves in the design documents, the end result is a spaceship sized wreck of catastrophic proportions and with very little redeeming qualities to prevent it from being placed at the very bottom of the bargain bin where it belongs.

The basic ideas behind Legendary were quite sound. Unfortunately it seems they were never properly realised, instead cobbled together with the digital equivalent of shredded newspaper and masking tape.

The Incredible Hulk is nothing more than a shoddy imitation.

Only pick this up if you're the sort of person who buys supermarket own-brand bog roll and enjoys the rough sawdust texture.

The action is dull, and the gameplay repetitive. Indeed, the very fact that the non-interactive cutscenes are by far and away the highlight of the game speaks volumes. [Japan Import]

Who would want to buy this game? Only Sado-masochists who enjoy shoddy frame rates, huge loading times, unintuitive controls, poor menu design, bugged gameplay and boring storylines. It could have been good, that's what infuriates most of all.

Feels like the product of a completely different publisher; the sort of output you would expect from a desperate company, eager to cash in on current gaming trends. For now, Amazing Island remains a failed experiment.

Consider this a bottom-line on the gaming barometer – a reference point where gaming simply does not get any worse.

It's almost like the time-space continuum ripped open and farted out a title from years ago which, by rights, should never exist and only does so because of some unholy pact with Satan.

Iron Man is a mess, an utter travesty and a total waste of anyone's money, no matter how little they spend on it.

Eat Lead is an outdated relic, it does nothing original or creative with the wealth of diverse, high-quality source material available to it.

Even the poorest of titles there shows more promise than what’s on display here.