Philadelphia Inquirer's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
For 3,286 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 70% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 27% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 6.5 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 67
Highest review score: 100 The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada
Lowest review score: 0 A Little Bit of Heaven
Score distribution:
3,286 movie reviews
  1. Icky, incoherent thriller.
  2. By the end of the film's two-hour stream of Be-Here-Now-isms, anyone left in the audience will be wanting to yell, "Put a sock in it!" to old Soc.
  3. OK, they squeezed one more lap out of this franchise. It's been a fun ride, but it's time to shut things down. If you get my drift.
  4. If the moral of Click is a stop-and-smell-the-roses bromide about how family comes first, the real message of this sappy, potty-mouthed seriocomedy is that a steady diet of Drakes and Hostesses will do you no good.
  5. "The Godfather" without Brando, "GoodFellas" without Scorsese, "The Sopranos" without Gandolfini - 10th & Wolf is all that, and less.
  6. Trapped between edgy art flick and exploitation psychothriller, The Quiet manages to be neither, and manages to be pretty awful in the bargain.
  7. So achingly empty, it's nearly existential.
  8. A mix of "Alice in Wonderland" and William S. Burroughs, "Psycho" and the psychotic. It's pretty much a squirmy experience all around.
  9. If all you ask of a movie is that it have scenic stars and some scenery (here the Sierras of California substitute for the Rockies of Wyoming), then Flicka is adequate. Me, I expected some conflict, some resolution, and a horse that took me on a wild ride. This one really never gets out of the gate.
  10. Tobey Maguire, terribly miscast and squeaky (that voice - it belongs to a kid!).
  11. What a mess.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 38 Critic Score
    A predictable, by-the-numbers TV-movie-sized affair which will break your heart - especially since it also contains brief flashes of horror greatness.
  12. Perfect Stranger is the Egg MacGuffin of whodunits, a cheesy affair that casts so many baited lures that they tangle each other and don't hook you.
  13. Art-directed within an inch of its life, Sleuth has the smirky gloss of a project that everyone involved with thinks is terribly good, and terribly clever. These people - Branagh, Pinter, Law and the usually great Caine (even in bad stuff) - are laboring under an epic misconception. Sleuth is just terrible.
  14. Guy Ritchie's Revolver premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival two years ago September. That's 26 months on a shelf somewhere, depriving moviegoers the thrill of jaw-droppingly awful Ray Liotta line readings, of bloody shoot-outs, bags of money, cutaways to frosty babes sucking on lollipops, and even a bit of violent anime.
  15. Like a grade-school version of an Indiana Jones adventure.
  16. Drawing comparisons to "The Wire" may be unfair, but taken on its own, this anemic vehicle for Ice Cube and Tracy Morgan to mug and jive through is just weak, weak stuff.
  17. An abhorrent cyberthriller starring a compelling Diane Lane.
  18. No doubt conceived as an underwater version of "National Treasure," Andy Tennant's film plays like a Three Stooges movie with scuba gear.
  19. Tedious, ludicrous and harmless glimpse of the dawn of civilization.
  20. Judah Friedlander and Lindsay Lohan are striking, respectively, as a Lennon paparazzo and a fan creeped out by Chapman.
  21. 88 Minutes proves itself to be a maddeningly mediocre, ineptly manipulative "real-time" thriller.
  22. Maybe if there was something going with the dialogue - snappy Chandlerisms, say, or even just sentences that made sense - the fussy digital artifice of The Spirit wouldn't seem so, well, dispiriting.
  23. An embarassingly unfunny, stumblebum adaptation of Toby Young's memoir.
  24. At one point, Statham chases down a sports car while pedaling madly on a kids' bike. Pathétique!
  25. A generic oven-stuffer that wants to be a stocking-stuffer, is a turkey, despite the foil wrapping and some artfully deployed tinsel.
  26. The acting is better than the script deserves and Lexi Alexander's cut-to-the-hearse direction lends the film considerable kick.
  27. Like moussed hair and inverted-pyramid shoulder pads, this sloppy, sloppy slapstick is an artifact from the 1980s.
  28. Entertainingly goofy for about 30 minutes. And then, for the next two hours-plus, it's agony.
  29. Screenwriters Nicole Eastman and the "Blonde" team of Karen McCullah Lutz and Kirsten Smith provide dialogue that has the propriety of the locker room.
  30. A stagy, arty, and uncompelling account of the Welsh writer and his menage-y relations.
  31. Another tale of Tinseltown drugs, sex and excess - has transferred itself to the screen with mind-boggling, laugh-inciting horribleness.
  32. The film quickly turns unintentionally, and unrelentingly, awkward.
  33. Ostensibly a comedy, and a feeble and innocuous one at that, Post Grad is one of those what-were-they-thinking?
  34. A pity-party of Hollywood narcissism.
  35. Faced with the script's weak humor and feeble stabs at irony, Schwartzman and Stiller turn it way up, setting the dial at "hammy."
  36. Surrogates, which borrows tone and content freely from "I, Robot," is all windup and no pitch.
  37. It doesn't help any that Wahlberg, looking perpetually dumbstruck, is among the clunkiest line-readers working in movies today.
  38. Struggles mightily to find its loony essence. But Bullock's apple-cheeked larkishness is all flailing limbs and bug-eyed reaction shots - there's no there there. Cooper's character is woefully underwritten, Church's is yet another vain anchorman-wannabe cartoon.
  39. The Wolfman feels like a film reedited and reworked so many times it has lost all narrative rhythm and suspense.
  40. Michael Lembeck directs with the subtlety of a sledgehammer, pounding every joke and cliche until they are flat, flat, flat.
  41. Tennant aims for a contemporary version of "The Thin Man," wedding the banter of sparring spouses with sleuth work. To say that he falls short of the mark is understatement.
  42. As an account of how for-profit big business literally rips a consumer's heart out, Repo Men is too graphic for me.
  43. A mercifully fleet and lamentably uninteresting adaptation of the DC Comic about a war-weary Confederate soldier.
  44. Parents in a masochistic mood can compound the headache-inducing experience by paying extra for the 3-D version.
  45. Murderously unfunny.
  46. Cage appears as a knight of the Crusades, slogging across the continents, slaying infidels and unbelievers and anyone else who gets in his way. There isn't a minute when it looks like he's having fun.
  47. What distinguishes The Dilemma in this genre is its resounding unfunnyness, its emotional dishonesty, and the general unlikability of its cast of characters.
  48. Hiring this sensitive fantasist (Gondry) to make the superhero saga The Green Hornet is like hiring satirist John Waters to make "Rambo." Hard to think of a more mystifying mismatch of filmmaker and material.
  49. Nostalgia for the '80s - big hair, Madonna, cocaine, big hair, Duran Duran, more cocaine - is all well and good. Unless it's practiced with the charmless ineptitude of Take Me Home Tonight.
  50. Beastly offers a thoroughly dopey reread of the "Beauty and the Beast" fairy tale.
  51. A case of when bad scripts happen to good actors. Given its similarities to a bygone sitcom, one might call it "Friends" without benefits.
  52. Hands-down the most nightmarishly awful film of the year.
  53. The aquatic and surf scenes are spectacular. The story, a clichéed climb to inspiration. Soul Surfer is more parable than plot.
  54. Here is a movie with everything going for it and nothing working.
  55. What has Campbell wrought? An intermittently amusing, interminable affair that for sheer ugliness and a scenery-chewing performance by Peter Sarsgaard has a certain Camp appeal.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 38 Critic Score
    The overwhelming sci-fi action spectacle is a merciless sensorial assault that leaves you with something akin to post-traumatic stress disorder.
  56. The film would be a moth-eaten mess without the wisecracking animals. Not that it's funny with them.
  57. Completely unappealing people.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 38 Critic Score
    Viewers get very little about Madoff himself. While the film is primarily about Markopolos, it makes little sense without much insight into his nemesis.
  58. It fails as a gripping home-invasion thriller.
  59. This heavy-handed muddle of a cop thriller is just impossibly bad.
  60. The greatest lacrosse movie of the 21st century - and, unless I'm mistaken, the only lacrosse movie of the 21st century.
  61. The problem is that these stoic warriors infect Act of Valor with more wooden acting than you'd see at a ventriloquism school.
  62. Rarely has a film so equally balanced macho and nacho, but Wrath does leave us with a few valuable lessons: a.) fratricide is a nasty business, best left to the Greeks and b) fighting fire with fire may sound good, but it turns out to be a really stupid idea.
  63. Laughably bad adaptation of a Guy de Maupassant novel.
  64. Hit & Run is a pleasant enough diversion - but more of the PPV persuasion.
  65. Hobbled by a laughably bad script and a uniformly uncharismatic cast.
  66. This saga of a former soccer star coaching his son's team in order to worm his way back into the heart of his ex-wife aims to be warm and funny. Alas, it is mechanical and exhausting, like a windup toy of a monkey crashing together cymbals for 106 minutes while incrementally winding down.
  67. The violence is plenty, and pointless.
  68. The film has been directed in a murky, rhythmless fashion by Niels Arden Oplev.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 38 Critic Score
    Robert Altman's Kansas City is a hollow period piece, a costume melodrama that's all jazzed up without a story to tell. [16 Aug 1996, p.4]
  69. In the annals of sequeldom, Kick-Ass 2 has to be one of the lamest follow-ups ever.
  70. The sort of generic crime thriller - stick-figure characters, pointless muddle of plot, people entering and exiting SUVs and Lear jets with a sense of urgency - that feels like it could drag on forever, and drag us down into a purgatory of stupefaction with it.
  71. This Romeo and Juliet is hard to take seriously - and simply hard to take.
  72. Just call this movie "The Hangover: AARP Strikes Back."
  73. The sheer brutality of Oldboy is stunning, especially a deeply disturbing scene in which Brolin tortures Samuel L. Jackson. But this is an unrelievedly grim and hermetic experience throughout, the cinematic equivalent of blunt trauma.
  74. Slapdash, with dialogue and plot points that were cliches in Dickens' era, the pic sends up, then reaffirms, all the values the media sell us each holiday: compassion, forgiveness, tolerance.
  75. It's highly doubtful that you'll grasp even a little of The Truth About Emanuel after seeing this film. It's not so much a thriller as it is a ride on a runaway crazy train.
  76. Ride Along is a film so casual in its conception and execution, it should be titled Drive Thru.
  77. Director Rob Meltzer, who made the kind-of-amusing meta short "I Am Stamos," directs things in shameless, let's-get-this-thing-over-with style, throwing in some gratuitous topless (female) nudity and allowing the usually amusing Kristen Schaal to let loose with a barrage of potty-mouthisms.
  78. The unintentional effect of movies like Bless the Child is that they are enough to make agnostics out of true believers.
  79. Nothing wrong with the syrupy romance Here on Earth that a megadose of insulin couldn't fix.
  80. Full of kerplunkingly unfunny jokes and ex-"Saturday Night Live" cast members turning up to do shtick.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Unfortunately, it lacks a compelling story or characters of any complexity.
  81. Rarely has sex on screen been so aggressively anti-erotic.
  82. What a stupefying thing it is.
  83. A stunt that fails.
  84. I laughed once.
  85. Wastes an A-list cast in a sorry send-up of B-movie private-eye cliches.
  86. This film about a career gal's date with fate careers out of control.
  87. I nodded off watching Just Visiting.
  88. Repetitive and tedious.
  89. Connoisseurs of giant, gnarled chunks of charred flesh, rejoice! There's plenty of it -- or stuff resembling it -- in the slasher-fest convergence of two killer franchises.
    • 14 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    In this frothy beach movie, they make pop-music lite together but create an utterly unconvincing romantic couple, seeming more like siblings or best friends. From Ruben to Clay might work better.
  90. The jokes are unabashedly pitched at 12-year-old boys, with flatulence, masturbation and excretions as the leading themes.
  91. As a western, American Outlaws is an utter failure. As the basis of a "Mad TV" parody, it is an unintentional hoot.
  92. 8 1/2 Women is a collage-y, self-reflexive sort of film that is designed to shock but more often just annoys.
  93. Long, lumbering and endlessly unfunny.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Reiner, who made "This is Spinal Tap," "The Sure Thing," "When Harry Met Sally" -- memorable movies all -- has made this silly slice of Lean Cuisine. And that, in the end, makes Alex and Emma an utter tragedy.

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