Portland Oregonian's Scores

  • Movies
For 2,791 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 64% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 33% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 5.4 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 67
Highest review score:
Critic Score 100
Lowest review score:
Critic Score 0
Score distribution:
2,791 movie reviews
  1. Director Stefen Fangmeier, a well-regarded special-effects man and second-unit director ("Master and Commander," "Galaxy Quest") does a superb job visualizing the CGI dragon. But Fangmeier is working with a script without a single memorable line and far too many characters and creatures with silly names.
  2. An unfunny, undramatic comedy-drama that asks us to care about lying idiots making implausible choices.
  3. Norbit might have worked if it had fully committed to being over the top or made Rasputia the lead character and found the human inside the cartoon. Instead, the movie doesn't give us anyone to care about.
  4. It gives me no pleasure to report that Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters is fairly excruciating to sit through -- because I'm writing this as a fan of the TV series that spawned the movie.
  5. Joins the growing list of blandly made erotic thrillers that contain no eroticism, few thrills and fewer likable characters.
    • Metascore: 55
    • Critic Score 42
    Surviving Picasso is tasteful, more expensive-looking than it really is, and not nearly as lengthy as it feels. [18 Oct 1996]
  6. A bloodless film that aims for wry but leaves you merely asking "why?"
    • Metascore: 51
    • Critic Score 42
    An ambitious but shapeless mix of road movie, romance and critique of black male-female relationships. [23 Jul 1993]
    • Metascore: 56
    • Critic Score 42
    The film as a whole is simply an interesting and amusing mess. [10 Aug 1990]
    • Metascore: 60
    • Critic Score 42
    It recalls a kind of French farce that assumes its audiences want to see the rich suffer. [18 May 1991]
    • Metascore: 57
    • Critic Score 42
    Traveller does pass the time painlessly, and it isn't aggressively stupid or hateful, like about half the movies Hollywood makes nowadays. But someone must have stolen its engine - this film has no narrative drive. [p May 1997]
    • Metascore: 28
    • Critic Score 42
    As a technical accomplishment it is extrely impressive. But as a work of entertainment, almost any 10 minutes of it are enough. [14 Jul 1992]
  7. The uneven filmmaking renders Minot's ideas impossibly trite.
  8. Yet another witless, listless outing by the alleged comic minds behind such dubious treats as "The State," "Stella" and "Wet Hot American Summer."
  9. The romance is boring. Everything is blandly good-looking. The emotional beats are so programmed, you can predict the entrance of every single note of the Philip Glass dirge of a score. And the title means nothing beyond its double-entendre.
  10. Lopez can't decide if she's playing Lavoe's victim or enabler -- the movie sort of half blames her -- and neither of her characters is likable. The music's lovely, though.
  11. To quote Dennis Hopper from the film "Search and Destroy": "Just because it happened to you doesn't make it interesting."
  12. It's a cartoon that thinks it isn't one.
  13. There are two solid sight gags and funny supporting work by Amy Poehler as a boozy publicist.
  14. Overheated claptrap that takes an issue of vital national importance and turns it into an inept cartoon that emboldens the worst instincts in our national character.
  15. At the end of Martian Child, we're told the movie is "inspired by actual events." But the movie isn't even fully inspired by David Gerrold's source novel that was inspired by actual events.
  16. Talky, didactic and essentially free of any real narrative, it views Iraq through the lens of Vietnam, which is fair enough, but ends up making the whole polemic seem like a condescending effort from aging baby boomers to get the younger generation to step up to the plate.
  17. The movie is not so much horrible as it is drab -- from its lazy plotting to its uninspired yuks to its cop-out ending to its relentlessly yellow-brown sets. "Mad Money" does little more than take up space, and you will be two hours closer to the grave when you leave the theater.
  18. The only bright spot is Marsden, a great actor who's always stuck playing the less-desirable romantic rival (see: "The Notebook," "X-Men," "Superman Returns"). He finally gets the fun-guy role for a change and does everything he can to rip it up. He can only do so much.
  19. Yet another mediocre-to-lame thriller shot in Portland.
  20. To be fair, Rudd and Bell are cute and funny in their scenes together, and Rudd salvages a few laughs with his deadpan line readings.
  21. Three stories in one. This might be two stories too many.
  22. As a chronicle of an extreme surfing subculture, Bra Boys is semi-fascinating. As a chronicle of rough-and-tumble street life, it's appallingly biased and self-glorifying.
  23. After the initial charm wears off, the whole thing gets check-your-text-messages dull.
  24. An old-fashioned story of courage and self-sacrifice in the face of war and deprivation. It's also sappy, boring and obvious.
  25. Unlike its predecessors, this one doesn't even try to aspire to myth. It aspires only to merchandising.
  26. Grabs a fistful of hot-button story elements -- race, sex, politics -- and promptly mixes them into the thriller equivalent of tapioca.
  27. A movie full of actors improvising their idea of how cops in a Scorsese flick would talk. It's a special sort of cartoonishness, a hard-to-pin-down brand of emotionally grandstanding fakeness you sometimes see in movies trying way too hard to be "gritty."
  28. For those disappointed in the grim, gritty feel of the latest James Bond movie and who long for the absurdity of the Roger Moore-era entries, Transporter 3, ought to fit the bill.
  29. Bees is a movie in which a bunch of powerful African American women get their lives upended and in some cases destroyed so a little white girl can feel better about herself.
  30. The script is just all kinds of terrible. The characters are hollow mannequins telling a thin, depressing story that's less of a noir and more of a simple-minded bummer full of barely connected scenes and stunningly empty dialogue.
  31. What damage could Michael Bay inflict on Jason Voorhees that earlier producers hadn't already inflicted on everyone's favorite hockey-masked serial killer? Well, Bay could make Jason Voorhees ... boring.
  32. Director R.W. Goodwin (an "X-Files" vet) makes a fatal mistake: He never takes a clear stance on the material he's spoofing.
  33. It's exactly the film Jarmusch wanted to make, but it's also smug, excruciating, borderline pointless. You could call it a deliberate effort to invert the conventions of the thriller; you could also call it, more rightly, a self-deluded disaster.
  34. The film is flat and false in the exact same way that director Anne Fletcher's last rom-com, "27 Dresses," was flat and false.
  35. For a ripped-from-reality film about love and death and family strife in the face of the war in Afghanistan, Brothers is awfully artificial.
  36. A facile, feel-good fable that substitutes cliché for reality at nearly every turn.
  37. The movie starts out as a potboiler with a troubling character arc; unfortunately, it ends up becoming a goofy, story-overwhelming Rube Goldberg contraption that would make the producers of the "Saw" series blush.
    • Metascore: tbd
    • Critic Score 42
    I am not qualified to refute every claim made in this movie, but I have seen enough topical documentaries to have a good idea when a filmmaker is not being entirely honest with viewers.
  38. It’s offensive, really, this blatant pandering to emotions.
  39. Whether Elia Kazan could have done something memorable with this script will remain an eternally open question. This film, though, is most effective as a reminder that Williams' works emerged from a certain time and place, and to approach them from another is fraught with peril.
  40. fFat, dull drag.
  41. This final act goes on far too long and devolves into such a miasma of pap that it's clear Stoller had no idea how to wrap things up.
  42. Here the homages/critiques of old craft and form are often laughably mangled, and nothing sexy, profound or illuminating results. For all its prettiness, it's the sort of picture that gives the arthouse a bad name.
  43. Brainless, witless, inept, ugly and crude,
  44. Time to retire OSS 117's license to kill before any more innocent people suffer.
  45. Eat Pray Love is magazine-spread self-help bullcorn with the highest possible production values, and I wasn't having any of it.
  46. It isn't a lack of realism or philosophical consistency that rankles most, though, but rather the anticlimactic story and uninteresting characters that make this Hereafter not very sweet at all.
  47. With a self-plagiarizing premise, lifeless performances and a clunky-to-say-the-least screenplay, this star-studded flop is one of 2010's most egregious wastes of cinematic talent.
  48. The result is a hybrid of "Falling Down" and "Short Cuts" without the iconic central character of the former or the latter's clear-eyed humanism.
  49. The film is as one-sided and overstacked as anything her prosecutors dreamed up. And the craft of the thing is so pedestrian as to crawl.
  50. Kung Fu 2 does almost NOTHING to advance the story, to deepen the characters, or to charm, amuse or entertain.
  51. Jumping repeatedly and randomly from present-day Shanghai to 1997 to 1829 and periods in between, the film has a pace that seems almost willfully tedious.
  52. The potential for an interesting story is high. Unfortunately, Miller's autobiographical tale, as told in Blue Like Jazz, squanders this potential by failing to take place in a recognizably real world.
  53. Befitting a film about Edgar Allan Poe, The Raven is dark and grisly and ghoulish. But it also has qualities that Poe's work never does: It's dull and mechanical and, most of all, phony.
  54. The whole thing has the feel of a fact-based dinner-table anecdote absurdly puffed up to feature length.
  55. By the time the film reaches its convoluted, bombastic and preposterous climax, any sense of real magic that it once conveyed has utterly vanished.
    • Metascore: 59
    • Critic Score 42
    Olivia Thirlby adds some humanity as the empath. And as the scarred queen of a drug cartel, Lena Headey chews the scenery, and some of her costars, with relish.
  56. One of the most lifeless and predictable movies you're likely to see this year.
  57. Very few will remember it in a few months, which is probably just fine with the folks who made it.
  58. The film looks old-fashioned, too, with cinematography and special effects so reminiscent of old-school, live-action Disney flicks such as "Something Wicked This Way Comes" that you wonder if it was an aesthetic choice or a budgetary concession. Either way, it doesn't work.
    • Metascore: 28
    • Critic Score 42
    At this point, "Die Hard" no longer describes the franchise. It describes the fans who are still willing to turn out for the noise and nonsense.
  59. As is, the slapstick humor and mild repartee won't please many with a mindset above that of a 10-year-old, while the level of (admittedly fantastical) violence might be a bit much for the pre-teen set.
  60. It's almost too bad, then, that MacArthur and Jones take a back seat to the far less interesting Gen. Bonner Fellers in the stolid drama Emperor.
    • Metascore: 67
    • Critic Score 38
    The first hour of Die Hard 2 is pretty good, despite consistent improbability. It's the second half, with its consistent impossibility, that looks like "Tom 'n' Jerry" or "Roadrunner." [6 July 1990, p.E3]
  61. One of the most wearisome "high adrenaline" movies to come along in a while.
  62. A forehead-poundingly bad picture.
    • Metascore: 24
    • Critic Score 33
    "Tootsie" meets "Hoop Dreams" in Juwanna Mann, and they don't get along. This basketball comedy turns out to be a total drag -- in both senses.
    • Metascore: 36
    • Critic Score 33
    Dreary and dull.
  63. A by-the-numbers recipe that ought to have shot off at least a few sparks, is as drab as the inmates' prison blues.
  64. Groove seems to be less about what it is chronicling than what its attempting to decipher.
  65. A film with almost zero redeeming value.
    • Metascore: 59
    • Critic Score 33
    As so often happens, politics and religion add up to a double dose of self-righteousness.
  66. Swings wildly but falls flat.
  67. Appallingly flat.
  68. A carnival of stupid coincidences, paper-thin characterizations, and inept staging, lighting and montage.
  69. A new political thriller, has an ending so egregiously stupid that not to reveal it would be a disservice to moviegoers.
  70. Best laugh at the movies all autumn.
  71. You're likelier to shrink in astonished horror from it than laugh.
  72. The trouble is that it's so lead-footed and delighted with itself even as bit after bit sinks like a lead weight.
  73. Goes on too long and doesn't have much to say.
  74. What's left is a husk with all the superficial features of a Scream movie and none of the heart, brains, guts or laughs.
  75. A movie built on one joke -- an old one -- and an incoherent, even idiotic plot.
  76. Plays like an episode of "JAG," the naval courtroom TV series. A L-O-N-G episode.
  77. While there are some glittery bits in it, the film is frustrating, cluttered, inelegant and garish.
  78. A seedy little movie with little in the way of theme, purpose, energy or wit, 'R Xmas is the latest slice-of-death drama from that earnest maestro of grub, Abel Ferrara.
  79. Has a few pleasing stylistic flourishes and a potentially Hitchcockian plot, but the writing and rhythm are so off that when the final "shocker" arrives, we have seen it coming or have abandoned caring.
  80. Miscast, clumsily staged and ideologically wobbly.
  81. It all makes you realize the importance of the guy who should have played Malkovich's role -- Christopher Walken. He makes films like this bearable.
  82. A disappointing venture. If only it had been more clever, perhaps darker.
  83. There are movies that are made for the big screen, and movies that are made for the small screen; Passionada is the latter type.
  84. Mingles bathos and pathos in unequal measures and instead of getting laughs, looks laughable.
  85. It's deeply ordinary, depressingly shabby stuff.
  86. So often out of control that it becomes absurd and exasperating.
  87. Not much in The Man From Elysian Fields resembles life on Earth, but there are a few moments with Jagger that feel desperate and human -- stuff from another movie entirely, in other words.
  88. A contrived and sentimental melodrama, the film takes a promising premise and crushes it with mind-numbing repetition, sophomoric conveniences, plastic acting and the worst score, perhaps, ever heard.
  89. Taking the film as a thriller, it's neither exciting nor scary, hampered by a middle that plays much too long.
  90. A limp and annoying picture.
  91. You can't help but think how much better this film would be had Woody Allen directed it...How much more acerbic fun would it be to see Judy Davis playing stenographer to a neurotic, writer's-blocked Woody?
  92. A very depressing movie.
  93. This isn't an ordinary film built on a remarkable performance; it's a poor one with a gem at its core. Penn can elevate it to mediocrity, but he cannot make it fly.
  94. Bang-bang, kiss-kiss, yawn-yawn. While dull death metal churns on the soundtrack, Johnson engages in one big brawl after another.
  95. Working with a weak script and too lightweight for its freakier moments with Green, the picture never gels. Green's the star, but he really should be in a movie much weirder than this one, a film that can accommodate his humor.
  96. Like his (Carrey) early work, it's not a particularly good film -- insipidly staged, inanely plotted, too weak to withstand the weight of any inquiries into logic or continuity -- but Carrey's energetic mugging, particularly early on, makes it relatively painless.
  97. Opens with a statement that Hillary Clinton, Bob Dole and Al Sharpton are not in the movie. Also not in the movie: laughs.
  98. Has a curious train-wreck quality to it that keeps you watching and thinking. (Even if you are thinking things like, Why were these lines ever written? When you hear the "turkey" line, your jaw will drop.)
  99. The script is inane, and though Ferri has some funny moments, the acting is annoying or hopelessly bland.
    • Metascore: 50
    • Critic Score 33
    Unfunny and misguided, Duplex deserves a wrecking crew.
  100. For those who've seen the original, no surprises will be unearthed other than an altered story (not for the better) and more gore.
  101. Does nothing right and, blessedly, vanishes swiftly like the aroma of a nasty belch.
  102. It's "Ocean's Eleven" for people who can't count past six.
  103. Sayles has committed the cardinal sin of putting his politics ahead of his characters, and the result is predictably lame.
  104. Saw
    What makes Saw so awful is that it starts with a clever premise and then completely blows it.
  105. Handsomely photographed, artfully edited and acted with skill and conviction. It is also so stupid that you expect to see strings of drool dripping from the corner of the screen.
  106. While his star, Jude Law, is infectiously watchable, Shyer's version of the material is tone deaf and splotchy.
  107. Simultaneously boring and cringe-inducing; you can't decide whether to flee the theater or lightly nap.
  108. A dreary, overlong and occasionally laughable classical epic about the great Macedonian world conqueror, it's guilty of a sin that no Stone film has ever committed: It's boring.
  109. Why did they think anyone would want to watch a Fat Albert adaptation that can't answer a simple question: "Who is this movie for?"
  110. While this film has got a good head on its shoulders and a nicely made-up face, flawless it's not.
  111. To be fair, there are moments when the film seems better than, finally, it is.
  112. We end up with a piece of B-grade junk in which Elektra exchanges "banter" with the unexceptional Prout between fight scenes so badly shot that even Garner looks like a stunt double.
  113. Hampered from the start by the numbingly formulaic additions by screenwriter James DeMonaco ("The Negotiator"). Toss in needlessly fussy visuals and a climax that is hilariously out of whack, and you've got an excellent excuse to stay home and watch the original.
  114. A movie of utter inconsequence -- a cinematic Listerine Strip that evaporates from the brain before you even get your popcorn tub to the trash.
  115. A Lot Like Love is, well, a lot like many other movies. It's also a lot like having your eyeballs seared by a propane flame -- in a bad way.
  116. A terrible, terrible movie. Its creators have a swell idea at the core, a wonderful leading lady, and several stalwart comic players in support, and they make of all of that a picture with the wit of an armpit fart, the verve of a boxwood shrub, and the appeal of a long night in an ER waiting room.
  117. A stultifying bore.
  118. All this star power goes for naught in Traeger's film, which tries to blend bucolic sweetness with juvenile let's-make-a-porno jokes.
  119. Unfortunately, the filmmakers failed to replace sex, splatter and cursing with sharp dialogue, characters and plotting.
  120. The loudest, dumbest, slowest, least entertaining and most annoying by a very comfortable margin.
  121. You end up with a movie that takes that real problem and makes it feel like an exploitation contrivance.
  122. The all-description storytelling leads to other problems, too, the worst being that "Boleyn" suffers from the same affliction as "The Golden Compass," where you're told about interesting stuff happening elsewhere in another movie you'd much rather be watching.
  123. Shrill, unfunny third installment.
  124. Every so often there's a tabloid news story about the Virgin Mary seen in a piece of toast or Mother Teresa on a tortilla, and most of us equate them with Elvis sightings. This film is for the rest.
  125. It's dull and crude and silly and without a lick of quality.
  126. Revenge of the Fallen almost feels like it's signaling an end-game for blockbuster movies: all sensation, no content, catastrophic expense.
  127. Structurally, this is as by-the-numbers as rom-coms get, right down to the wacky best friends, played by Judy Greer and Dan Fogler. For a while, it's low-key enough to be tolerable.
  128. Deeply phony, strangely static, disengaged, flaccid and, quite often, silly, it’s a film that tries to bully you into emotions with flourishes of music, contorted camera angles, screams of special effects, smears of gore, and earnest close-ups of its woefully miscast star.
  129. What could have been a biting, darkly comic action flick about capitalistic health care run amok is instead a familiar, gory, post-apocalyptic slog.
  130. The comic moments are fewer, flatter and far, far less welcome.
  131. The movie's a fish-out-of-water romantic-comedy thriller that forgets to be romantic, comedic or thrilling.
  132. There's almost nothing to Battleship beyond its grindingly dull, digitally rendered naval warfare.
  133. Just pass on K-PAX.
  134. So drippy it really should be hung out to dry.
  135. A movie so lame that Keanu Reeves lends it gravity with his mere presence.
    • Metascore: 23
    • Critic Score 25
    Whatever stinks in this theater, it isn't love.
  136. An annoying, unclever, unlikable movie.
  137. This little serio-comedy contains absolutely nothing that warrants big-screen release. It's lit like TV, acted like TV and staged like TV.
  138. If ever a film was fit only for straight-to-video release, it's this one.
  139. So tedious that the experience results in nearly two hours of squirming and cringing.
  140. A grating experience from start to finish.
  141. An ugly, stupid movie it turned out to be. Incoherent, arbitrary, hyperactive and dark enough to make you fear you've gone blind.
  142. Maybe if the story weren't so ludicrous we'd care. Or maybe if the film just went overboard with its ludicrousness, we'd be entertained, but Don't Say a Word is merely boring.
  143. It's not confusing, it's just slow. Very slow. Glacial.
  144. The film drags and lingers and goes more or less nowhere, imitating its protagonists' lives so exactly that you want to give them both a good smack.
  145. The movie falters when it gets mean.
  146. Corky Romano is merely grating. Until he finds a better director than Rob Pritts, Kattan's best bet is to stick with "SNL" impresario Lorne Michaels.
  147. Few movies feel quite so perfunctory or needless or pointless as this one.
    • Metascore: 19
    • Critic Score 25
    Has all the gross-out humor but none of the goofy sweetness. It also has neither of the Farrellys, which is agonizingly evident throughout.
  148. So shapeless, pointless and witless a film that it can be explained only by surmising that the people who made it were bombed at the time.
  149. Garners only a few chuckles, becoming, even in its short running time, boring.
  150. It's fitting that Black Knight, the new time-travel movie with Martin Lawrence, should arrive at the start of the Christmas season, because the season gives us the perfect word to describe it: humbug.
  151. Washington can't save a picture that spends so much time worrying about a heart that it loses its head.
  152. A lazy, trite comedy that's made by people who don't care either.
  153. Scooby-Doo is bad. Let's just get that right out of the way. Filled with unclever quips, tired humor, a lazy silliness and bland execution, the picture is a tedious puff of nothing.
  154. The film manages the rare trick of improving as it unrolls from the utterly putrid to the barely tolerable. And, friends, I wish to say that sometimes that is as good as you can hope for in this racket.
  155. Such a staggering, start-to-finish disaster that you don't know how to begin detailing its outrages and failings.
  156. Compare it with the book, and it stinks. Look at the film on its own, and it still stinks.
  157. This goopy dramedy is unfunny, mentally bankrupt and makes parenthood look like a terrifying death sentence.
    • Metascore: 42
    • Critic Score 25
    So god-awful it falls into the category of needing to be seen to be believed. A purported satire of the 1975 camp horror classic, it succeeds in failing on almost every level, including knowing what it's actually satirizing.
  158. Worthless, tasteless and unfunny.
    • Metascore: 63
    • Critic Score 25
    Their collective timing is so off that the dead space around their endless bits is like that more commonly experienced during a job interview gone wrong.
  159. Among the lamest serial-killer movies ever made.
  160. It's simply an awful, awful film.
  161. It's a terrible picture: ugly and illogical and clumsily staged and peppered with crude, witless humor.
  162. Simply something you don't want to touch.
  163. The story is as predictable as it is saccharine. Apart from the presence of local landmarks, there's no reason the Rose City should be proud of this effort.
  164. Social justice is never an excuse for bad art. In fact, one could argue that a really bad movie about a really important subject is twice the artistic crime -- because, however well-intentioned, it trivializes human suffering while squandering a teaching opportunity.
  165. All in all, it's hard to dispute that House of D declares its own worth on arrival.
  166. Here's a hint to tracking down an intelligent, discriminating significant other: stand outside the entrance to a theater showing Must Love Dogs. Once the film begins, look for the first person to walk out.
  167. The Baxter is so ineptly conceived, staged, written and played that you suspect it's part of a psychology experiment to see if people will laugh at anything.
  168. In small doses, this looks kind of cool. For two hours, it's excruciating.
  169. It's horrible. It's wretched. It's Limburger pickled in castor oil.
  170. Freedomland is the worst kind of bad movie: one that thinks it's important.
  171. It's meant to be funny, but I couldn't help thinking they were figuring out where to plant the pipe bombs.
  172. Nothing shakes this pathetic attempt at humor from its self-satisfied torpor.
  173. In a way, it's perfect: You can't imagine anyone seeing this mess and not feeling lesser for the experience.
    • Metascore: 45
    • Critic Score 25
    The bad news is that Jefferson is inept and inert. [21 Apr 1995]
  174. At what point does The Condemned turn from a stupid-fun action movie into something unpleasant and hypocritical?
  175. Fonda, playing grandmother to this clan of narcissists, is the only one who keeps her dignity. She's funny and low-key and deserves better comeback material than this and "Monster-in-Law." The other two actresses are humiliated.
    • Metascore: 46
    • Critic Score 25
    Flirt fails because the basic story isn't very good and its retelling adds only incidental insights. [11 Oct 1996]
    • Metascore: 33
    • Critic Score 25
    For all his invention, Forsyth's reach ultimately exceeds his grasp. "Local Hero," without trying so self-consciously hard, conveyed more of the ephemeral beauty of life than Being Human does.
    • Metascore: 53
    • Critic Score 25
    It just drones on and on, so repetitiously that you wonder if some of the reels have been shown twice. [7 Nov 1992]
    • Metascore: 44
    • Critic Score 25
    Kyra Sedgwick is turned into a caricature of a sports agent. "NYPD Blue" grad Gordon Clapp gets one line of dialogue. And Morris Chestnut is pushed out to make room for one more "ain't she cute" moment.
  176. It's trying to fill some perceived market void created by the end of "Harry Potter."
  177. I could see people enjoying Dan in Real Life, I guess -- the scenery is nice and the people are pretty and the songs are cute little emotion substitutes. But Dan? Buddy? It's not all about you.
  178. Seeing Hitman isn't like playing a video game or even like watching someone else play a video game. It's like watching someone stupid play a bad video game.
  179. This moronic yuletide time-waster might work as a way to grab a few winks at the mall during last-minute shopping, but it's not going to end up as a highlight on the resume of anyone involved.
  180. Confused, morally queasy, self-important mess.
  181. Might actually be the stupidest movie with good intentions that I've ever seen.
  182. I can see how Mamma Mia! might be a fun stage musical. As a movie musical, it's a train wreck.
  183. Is there anything more depressing than when middlebrow filmmakers decide to remake bona fide classics that did not, under any circumstances, need to be remade?
  184. Reprehensible.
  185. Scratch the surface, and the movie's underpinnings are an insult to women everywhere -- the film is slick stupid propaganda for the myth of The One True Love that wastes the talents of fine actresses.
  186. Spoiler alert: It can leave you feeling kind of empty and sad! It's pretty, icky and boring all at once, and feels like nothing so much as an unusually depressing Ban du Soleil commercial.
  187. Better luck trying to find out what truly happened to the real Earhart than trying to diagnose all that's wrong with this hapless film.