San Francisco Chronicle's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
For 5,742 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 53% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 45% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 0 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 62
Highest review score: 100 Quiz Show
Lowest review score: 0 Mrs. Winterbourne
Score distribution:
5,742 movie reviews
  1. The film has some chuckles, if no belly laughs; it has some warmth, if no great heat.
  2. It's harmless.
  3. You can't fool me. I know it's actually a parlor game.
  4. The worst kind of avant-garde film, one that hides its lack of commitment to the story, the characters and the genre under cover of being experimental. It mocks form and plays with form but offers nothing in its place, just boredom, emptiness and the oldest metaphor in captivity, about grass coming up through concrete.
  5. Standing Ovation is an innovative film in the sense that every minute or so it comes up with a different way of being annoying. Moreover, it often goes for a layered effect, in which it's annoying in two or three ways simultaneously.
  6. In Step Up 3D, what's going on is: nothing.
  7. That Vampires Suck is a step above god-awful is something of a miracle.
  8. There are six standard types of violence in film these days: Tarantino, comic book, Scorsese, martial arts, horror and stupid. For stupid, look no further than Centurion.
  9. The whole thing is monumentally gruesome and just as monumentally cynical, a riot of grisly cliches designed to titillate and amuse.
  10. If there was ever a human being who needed a visit from the ghosts of Christmas past, present and future, this is the guy.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Unlike "Exit Through the Gift Shop," Catfish isn't able to make the leap from odd incident to an indictment of our times.
  11. It turns out to be just as bad as any routine French romantic comedy - illogical, inconsistent and sloppily written, a charmless, tasteless, witless waste of time.
  12. As vile, unredeeming and thoroughly unpleasant experiences go, I Spit on Your Grave at least has one thing interesting about it. It's a document of the most paranoid fantasies that urban, Northern people have about a rural Southern people.
  13. An unbearable exercise in provocation.
  14. This one is a long, archetypal journey that screeches to a halt a few stops short of its destination.
  15. There are all kinds of bad movies in the world, but it's really only stardom that can create the exact variety of cinematic abortion we find in The Tourist.
  16. Suffers from some of the deficiencies common to first features. It is sincere and earnest but the product of an assumption that the milieu itself is compelling enough to command an audience's attention.
  17. The Nutcracker in 3D will be barely recognizable to fans of the beloved holiday classic. Imagine watching Tchaikovsky's ballet after taking a handful of peyote - on a day when all of the dancers call in sick and the orchestra decides to play a different set of the composer's works.
  18. The comedy never really takes off because it's phony.
  19. The film is confusing and awkwardly timed, and it drags.
  20. This is the first Focker installment not directed by Jay Roach, who did a good job balancing the yuks with the more outrageous gross-outs. That comic-revolting parity shouldn't be much of a challenge for "American Pie's" Paul Weitz, and yet the skeevier bits aren't especially funny.
  21. There's nothing here but a concept and a marketing and merchandising strategy, at the center of which somebody - oh, no - had to come up with an actual movie.
  22. As weird as it sounds.
  23. For some, this sort of thinking is a much-needed revolution in human consciousness. For others, it's little more than New Age platitudes and questionable science.
  24. Rendered nearly unwatchable by overblown close-ups and an unrelenting shaky-cam.
  25. The chief problem with Your Highness is its lack of imagination - its misuse and overuse of language and visual riffs that are only marginally amusing at best.
  26. Sometimes it's unpleasant, sometimes it's insincere, and for long stretches it's boring.
  27. The need for a sequel was zero - proved by the fact that the characters end the movie pretty much exactly where they started it.
  28. Dragons may have seemed less out of place three decades ago, but it would have been a bad movie then as well. It's filled with clumsy transitions and erratic performances, and tied together by an awkward framing device.
  29. Hesher is about as awful as independent films get, a mix of ugliness and unearned sentiment, with a flat story, repellent and pathetic characters and dialogue that consists of lots of stammering and cursing.

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