San Francisco Chronicle's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
For 5,754 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 53% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 45% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 0 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 62
Highest review score: 100 The Deep Blue Sea
Lowest review score: 0 The Lone Ranger
Score distribution:
5,754 movie reviews
  1. So many horror conventions are at work in After.Life that either the filmmakers are parodying them or couldn't come up with anything better. I'm betting on the second choice.
  2. When You're Strange is a remedial Doors class, taught by a professor who sounds as if he's doing voiceovers for car commercials.
  3. It's all talking heads, clanging music, substandard graphics, long scans of Web-page headlines and Bowdon's heavily cadenced voiceovers.
  4. You can get away with almost anything in a farce except failing to be funny, and that's what kills Death at a Funeral.
  5. The Losers is boring. It's predictable. It's so, so active, and yet so, so dead.
  6. What we have in this film is a whole lot of nothing, and the little that's there is irritating.
  7. It's a strange thing, this type of whimsy. Kari offers us ideas in place of characters, and yet he expects us to see through these ideas to the real-life conditions they represent - and then to respond to them in kind.
  8. As a Jerry Bruckheimer production and a game adaptation, Prince of Persia has every business being jumpy and sequential, and as a frivolous summer popcorn flick it has every business being inane.
  9. Twenty minutes in, the movie is already operating at a deficit, and it never recovers.
  10. Visually, Jonah Hex is an orgy of overstatement: rapid edits, garish colors, harsh light.
  11. Highly visual but cold. It's undeniably inventive, but also relentlessly fey and self-consciously zany and, in terms of story, it moves with audacious slowness.
  12. The film has some chuckles, if no belly laughs; it has some warmth, if no great heat.
  13. It's harmless.
  14. You can't fool me. I know it's actually a parlor game.
  15. The worst kind of avant-garde film, one that hides its lack of commitment to the story, the characters and the genre under cover of being experimental. It mocks form and plays with form but offers nothing in its place, just boredom, emptiness and the oldest metaphor in captivity, about grass coming up through concrete.
  16. Standing Ovation is an innovative film in the sense that every minute or so it comes up with a different way of being annoying. Moreover, it often goes for a layered effect, in which it's annoying in two or three ways simultaneously.
  17. In Step Up 3D, what's going on is: nothing.
  18. That Vampires Suck is a step above god-awful is something of a miracle.
  19. There are six standard types of violence in film these days: Tarantino, comic book, Scorsese, martial arts, horror and stupid. For stupid, look no further than Centurion.
  20. The whole thing is monumentally gruesome and just as monumentally cynical, a riot of grisly cliches designed to titillate and amuse.
  21. If there was ever a human being who needed a visit from the ghosts of Christmas past, present and future, this is the guy.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Unlike "Exit Through the Gift Shop," Catfish isn't able to make the leap from odd incident to an indictment of our times.
  22. It turns out to be just as bad as any routine French romantic comedy - illogical, inconsistent and sloppily written, a charmless, tasteless, witless waste of time.
  23. As vile, unredeeming and thoroughly unpleasant experiences go, I Spit on Your Grave at least has one thing interesting about it. It's a document of the most paranoid fantasies that urban, Northern people have about a rural Southern people.
  24. An unbearable exercise in provocation.
  25. This one is a long, archetypal journey that screeches to a halt a few stops short of its destination.
  26. There are all kinds of bad movies in the world, but it's really only stardom that can create the exact variety of cinematic abortion we find in The Tourist.
  27. Suffers from some of the deficiencies common to first features. It is sincere and earnest but the product of an assumption that the milieu itself is compelling enough to command an audience's attention.
  28. The Nutcracker in 3D will be barely recognizable to fans of the beloved holiday classic. Imagine watching Tchaikovsky's ballet after taking a handful of peyote - on a day when all of the dancers call in sick and the orchestra decides to play a different set of the composer's works.
  29. The comedy never really takes off because it's phony.

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