For 4,782 reviews, this publication has graded:
-
48% higher than the average critic
-
3% same as the average critic
-
49% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 2.6 points lower than other critics.
(0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 59
| Highest review score: |
Critic Score
100
|
|---|---|
| Lowest review score: |
Critic Score
0
|
Score distribution:
-
Positive: 2,324 out of 4782
-
Mixed: 1,769 out of 4782
-
Negative: 689 out of 4782
4,782
movie reviews
- By critic score
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
It's really gory and really dull. Mostly just dull. -
-
-
Critic Score 25
Prison makes its 84-minute running time feel like a five-year sentence with no chance for parole. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
Opaque acting, excruciating dialogue, and flat, affectless direction certainly don't help, but even in brilliant hands, Flannel Pajamas would still be a movie about two horrible, unsympathetic people doing dreadful things to each other, and learning nothing in the process. Why should anyone else have to endure it too? -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Even with a wild card like Black desperately retooling his lines, there's nothing authentic or personal about The Holiday--it's as chilling as heart-warmers get. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Seems to go out of its way to obliterate all the elements that made the original so special. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
The film strays so far from verisimilitude that it feels more like a big celebrity dress-up party than history brought to life. The profoundly silly Internet favorite series "Yacht Rock" offered a more convincing take on pop-culture history and that was at least going for laughs. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
A romantic triangle between werewolves and humans doesn't sound dull, but director Katja von Garnier seems to determined to drain the life out of it. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Assembles the most motley group of incompetents this side of a "Police Academy" movie, yet somehow misses the laughs. But humorlessness is probably the least of the film's problems, lagging behind amateur-night performances from the no-name cast, a homogenous visual palette (and from a music-video director, no less!), and lots of pointless sadism. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Garry Marshall has too much confidence that he can match the weighty issues here with the light comedy. He can't. Or at least he can't with this cast. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
Shrek The Third instead goes for less: fewer jokes, less energy, and toned-down characters. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
At heart, it's just the latest from one-man industry Luc Besson, so even though it looks like art, it plays like schlock. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
It goes without saying that Evan Almighty, a kid-friendly follow-up to the Jim Carrey vehicle "Bruce Almighty," is more Ronald McDonald than Holy Bible, but it didn't have to be this epically trite. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Evening proves that there are such things as mistakes, by featuring two hours of bad choices and half-executed ideas. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
In a genre where killers love to play head games, it's a clever idea (Cohen's?) to have this one remain mute, but that leaves Cuthbert to carry much of the psychological load, and there's no substance to her character, apart from the suggestion that she's being punished for her vanity. -
-
-
Critic Score 25
With its complete lack of empathy for early Mormons and simplistic rendering of historical figures, September Dawn is that rare movie that actually deserves whatever condemnation might come from religious groups. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
The 11th Hour is slick and passionate, but neither persuasive nor helpful; it's a headache of a film directed like an Errol Morris project, but with half the substance. It's clearly preaching to the choir, but even they may find it off-key. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
Sometimes the actors lip-sync, but more often, they're singing along with the original vocal tracks, trying to out-belt Elvis Presley and Bruce Springsteen, like a cadre of enthusiastic shower singers joining in with the radio. The resulting cacophony is generally harsh and sloppy, and the film follows suit. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
There's an audience out there for this kind of thing--Cook is obviously a populist, and Norbit made bushels of money--but if this is what passes for funny, what in the world of comedy DOESN'T qualify? -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Reggaeton has officially come of age: The burgeoning subgenre now has a terrible, opportunistic exploitation movie to call its own. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
All talk and zero characterization, it doesn't even feel like a real movie. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Ritchie has said that it takes several viewings to fully understand what's going on in Revolver, but once will be enough for most to agree to take his word for it. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Cultists will be happy to discover that In The Name Of The King bears all the so-bad-it's-good hallmarks of a classic Boll production. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
The almost perversely colorblind College Road Trip represents a strange milestone in black film. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Currently stopping by theaters briefly en route to DVD, the film tries to position Jameson as the next Linnea Quigley, the B-movie queen behind such enduring titles as "Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers" and "Sorority Babes In The Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama." -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
To think that a semi-major studio financed a production this low-rent and listless is amazing: Since when did MGM start making student films? -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
The overall experience is manic, juvenile, and hit-or-miss, as if the auteurs behind "Epic Movie" were trying to remake "Wag The Dog." It's too soon to laugh about Iraq, and it'll never be time to laugh about it with this kind of maladroit humor. -
-
-
Critic Score 25
If the movie had greater style, it might approach the delirious badness of "The Valley Of The Dolls," but it's too dull to qualify as camp. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Roberts blunders amiably and cluelessly through his amateurish eyesore of a documentary on society's obsession with beauty, perpetually searching for a thesis that will transform a shambling mess of half-baked thoughts and pointless digressions into a real documentary. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
The Spirit feels like the follow-up to "Batman & Robin" no one wanted. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
People's title proves prophetic, only this time the people being alienated are the suckers in the paying audience. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
It'd probably feel just a little bit timelier and more relevant if it took place in a universe that bore even the faintest resemblance to our own. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Dimly lit, emotionally empty, and devoid of thrills, Bangkok Dangerous should disappoint Cage fans looking for Wicker Man-style camp thrills just as thoroughly as action buffs looking for a passable thriller. It's never close to good, and it can't even get bad right. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Norton is infamous for rewriting scripts and acting as a de facto director on his movies yet he seems lost and defeated here. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
The film still suffers from cheap plasticky design, a klutzy overall look, dim preschooler humor, and a nearly impact-free story that thinks it's clever when it steals cues from 2001. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Devotes so much time and energy to flashbacks and recycling footage from its predecessors that it threatens to implode. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Madonna presents the three leads as flawed but essentially decent and redeemable, but they're bound up in a story that's meant to affirm a vague set of values. If she needs to justify the "Sex" book by charting her own contrived path from filth to heavenly wisdom, that's fine. But she should do it on her own time. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
When it comes to time-wasting memory games, crossword puzzles are more fun than this movie. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
This is junk, a bunch of hard-R action scenes kept together by the thinnest of plots. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Sandler’s laziness, sloppiness, and cynical pandering are all over Bedtime Stories, and it turns what’s intended to be a graceful intersection of fairytale whimsy and real-world slapstick into an ugly, head-on collision. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
For a film shamelessly trumpeting the importance of staying together through the hard times, Broken makes a disconcertingly convincing case for divorce. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
What darkness the movie achieves comes solely from the lighting. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
It's almost charming in its sheer lack of ambition, but the lack of creativity in its by-the-numbers shocks is harder to excuse. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Doing his best to class up the joint, "The Wire's" Idris Elba stars as the perfect man. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
The sort of rom-com apparatus that no relationship can overcome. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
2012 is ultimately only about finding new ways to topple monoliths. Only they don’t feel that new. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Robinson is hilarious, at least in the early going. Sadly, Robinson is all that stands between Miss March and complete worthlessness. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Any resemblance the film bears to real people and real situations is purely coincidental. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
It’s a busier and less coherent film, too, with a baffling master plot and a crowded pileup of special effects in search of something to do. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Tony Scott’s bracingly awful remake/desecration of the classic ‘70s thriller. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Though he commits to a lot of embarrassing silliness, Murphy projects so little genuine warmth that his transformation barely registers. -
-
-
Critic Score 25
Considering its focus on a pioneering, rule-breaking icon, the film’s utter lack of personality isn’t just a failure. It’s close to an insult. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
The whole movie is just one increasingly dull roll downhill. The same could be said for this once-fresh franchise. -
-
-
Critic Score 25
Sorority Row might be utterly lacking in suspense, surprises, and wit, but nobody can say it doesn’t have a hero. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Sports movies have a long, troubled history of well-meaning white paternalism, with poor black athletes finding success through white charity. But The Blind Side, based on Michael Lewis’ non-fiction book, finds a new low. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Adults should steer clear. Kids should be sent to it only if they’ve been extraordinarily naughty. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
A flagrantly ridiculous thriller that tries to retrofit "Saw" to function as a mainstream, semi-respectable vigilante picture -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Dieckmann fails to notice that Thurman doesn’t have the comic chops for the material--she comes off more like a self-pitying loser than a witty, put-upon everywoman. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Explores love in all its myriad forms, from the sickeningly sappy to the cornball to the groaningly precious and obnoxiously cute. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Tennant and his actors have done the bare minimum to carry their lifeless movie past the finish line, and their apathy reads a lot like contempt. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Baruchel and Eve never shed that awkward first-date chemistry, which speaks less to their talents or the possibilities of mismatched romance than to a movie that forces them together like animals being mated in captivity. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Offers a taming-of-the-shrew scenario so relentlessly bland and old-fashioned it makes "Dear John," the Sparks adaptation from two months ago, look like "Last Tango In Paris." -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
There isn’t a whiff of humility or self-deprecation to Clay, Roque, Jensen, Cougar, and Pooch, a collection of black-ops douchebags and our ostensible heroes. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Director Samuel Bayer, a veteran commercial and music video director responsible for Nirvana’s “Smell Like Teen Spirit Video” back when the original Nightmare series was still a going concern, brings a slick visual sense but not a hint of vision. -
-
-
Critic Score 25
Sex And The City 2 panders to that audience to the point of self-destruction, squandering whatever goodwill the franchise had left after the first so-so movie by plopping its beloved characters into a series of garish vignettes that throw their shallowness into sharp relief. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
With every project, he pops open the same trunkload of shtick and leaves everyone to argue over whether it’s art. It’s a win-win situation for Korine, who’s either a genius or a provocateur who’s succeeded in gaming his stuffy critics. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Marmaduke saves its farts for the beginning and end, but the stink carries through the whole movie. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Stone's film, more an act of boosterism than inquiry, is a tremendous missed opportunity. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Sam Adams 25
It's disheartening that a story with roots in autobiography, no matter how tentative, should end up as such an impersonal genre rehash. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
The boys similarly deserve very minor props for choosing a satirical target that lends itself to satire: the glum, self-important Twilight novels and movies. Sadly, that's where the filmmakers' mild accomplishments end and the groaningly predictable hackwork begins. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Rapper, producer, and mogul Tip "T.I." Harris was recently named "global creative consultant" for Rémy Martin cognac. Coincidentally or not, he's also the star and producer of Takers, a heist thriller that feels suspiciously like a feature-length commercial for expensive liquor. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Perhaps someday, in the greatest twist of all, Shyamalan will be remembered as the Hitchcock of the early 21st century. Until then, movies like Devil will be misunderstood as schlock. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Zellweger has come an awful long way since Matthew McConaughey terrorized her in "Texas Chainsaw Masscare": The Next Generation, but not quite as far as she might like to imagine. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Not surprisingly, the remake gussies up the grindhouse roughness of the first film, which makes it relatively more palatable-yet still vapid and repulsive-while also, in a perverse way, selling it out. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
It's neither remotely convincing as true-to-life drama or lurid and propulsive enough to work as exploitation. It's just bad.- Posted Oct 21, 2010
- Read full review
-
-
- Posted Dec 14, 2010
- Read full review
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
The best that could be said of Yogi Bear is that it doesn't diminish its source material.- Posted Dec 16, 2010
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
When the conclusion leaves the door open for still another sequel, it feels like an invitation to a living wake.- Posted Dec 22, 2010
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
The film looks dispiritingly cheap and, as if in response, most of his cast seems half-committed at best, as if they're counting the moments until they can move on to a bigger picture.- Posted Jan 6, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
A deplorable unofficial reworking of "Single White Female."- Posted Feb 4, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Aniston and Sandler, however, play characters too awful to deserve anyone better than each other. But what did we do to deserve them?- Posted Feb 10, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Star Martin Lawrence, now the sole remaining element from the original "Big Momma's House" 11 years ago, looks pretty tired both in and out of makeup here.- Posted Feb 19, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Critic Score 25
To give credit where it's due, Footprints makes a game attempt at creating a love letter to a place that may be inherently unlovable: Hollywood Boulevard, in all its faded glory and present-day Hooters/Hard Rock Cafe tackiness.- Posted Apr 14, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
When the material gets really bad, as it does in the dismal Did You Hear About The Morgans?, Grant's pinched facial expressions become an inadvertent commentary on the movie he's making, as if he plainly realizes that his one-liners are tanking.- Posted Apr 18, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
It's all quirk, posturing, attitude, and needless exertion signifying nothing beyond its own sad need to impress.- Posted May 12, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Critic Score 25
The "romantic" half of Love, Wedding, Marriage's romantic comedy doesn't work, but that isn't nearly as problematic as the film's profound unfunniness.- Posted Jun 2, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
It shouldn't, in other words, be that hard to make a good Conan movie. John Milius did a half-decent job with "Conan The Barbarian" in 1982, but this new film of the same name feels like a half-hearted revamp of virtually any of the Conan rip-offs that clogged up video-store shelves in the '80s.- Posted Aug 17, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Not a second of it is convincing - or compelling - but then the film is about "utopia," a blandly idealized place unblemished by hardship, malice, sin, or errant golf strokes.- Posted Aug 31, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
The original was repulsive but impossible to shake. This remake is pure applause bait, which makes it barbaric in ways Peckinpah would never have dreamed.- Posted Sep 15, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
The first Human Centipede had audacity on its side. Human Centipede II has only excess.- Posted Oct 5, 2011
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
For the scandal-prone icon behind the camera - who glibly writes off all that talk about her subjects' Nazi sympathies as slanderous nonsense from a jealous, hateful press and gossipy busybodies - the film might as well be called ME.- Posted Feb 1, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Given the creepiest rom-com premise this side of "Addicted To Love" - which at least had the wisdom to reflect on its camera-obscura voyeurism - director McG tries to turn This Means War into a cool pop confection along the lines of his Charlie's Angels movies. But pouring on the douchey hipness and charm only makes things worse.- Posted Feb 15, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
It's thin material, to say the least, and manipulative to boot, putting women, children, and a SEAL father-to-be in jeopardy in ways more about servicing cheap thrills than any larger point about the perilous state of the world in 2012.- Posted Feb 22, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 25
While the ending is wretchedly fakey and predictable, Murphy in subdued mode gives it a little authentic sweetness.- Posted Mar 8, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Wrath Of The Titans is shopworn and derivative even by the degraded standards of contemporary blockbuster filmmaking.- Posted Mar 29, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
No, the indie horror movie ATM is not about a psychotic automated teller that charges the steepest of convenience fees - your life! - but it isn't much smarter than that premise, either.- Posted Apr 4, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
- Posted Apr 18, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Fischer at least has personal and romantic reasons to be involved with this film, but audiences are unencumbered by such obligations, and should heed the title's warning sign and opt out of Kirk, Fischer, and Messina's fruitless little circle of pain.- Posted Apr 25, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Bravely or stupidly, both A Little Bit Of Heaven and its heroine charge on as if the introduction of terminal cancer didn't change things that much.- Posted May 2, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Girl In Progress is ultimately less interested in subverting the clichés of the genre than in recycling them. It wants audiences to know it's in on the joke though it's not always apparent that there even is a joke in the first place.- Posted May 12, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
Adrien Brody delivers a colorful turn as a braided-and-tatted drug kingpin who thinks his pet toad talks to him (funny animal, check!), but High School is otherwise a tedious sludge through the same gray corridors where the same old gags wait around every turn.- Posted May 30, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
It's a potentially creepy setting that would give an innovative director a chance to do a lot with a little. Unfortunately, Lincoln isn't one of those.- Posted Aug 24, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
The Possession attempts to breathe new life into a creaky old subgenre by taking its exorcist and demon from Jewish mythology, but even this backfires: The casting of Jewish reggae star Matisyahu would be distracting even if he weren't introduced singing softly to himself.- Posted Aug 30, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
The Cold Light Of Day is the antithesis of a labor of love; it's a cold, mercenary endeavor that, like the thematically similar Taylor Lautner vehicle "Abduction," diligently ignores the potentially intriguing issues of family and identity its plot raises.- Posted Sep 8, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
So why is The Paperboy so bizarrely dull? It's as if the filmmakers combined 18 different kinds of scalding-hot peppers, yet inexplicably emerged with oatmeal.- Posted Oct 3, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Gallagher briefly threatens to turn Smiley into something closer to the hallucinatory psychological horror of "Repulsion," but he retreats to the more conventional twists and jump-scares expected of bottom-of-the-barrel slasher films like this one. This film will not do for the Internet what "Psycho" did for showers - no more computers have to be smashed because of it.- Posted Oct 10, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Stiff, episodic, and disjointed, Silent Hill: Revelation 3D replicates its source material all too faithfully.- Posted Oct 26, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Just like "Illegal Aliens," Addicted To Love is an exploitation movie, albeit one without even the science-fiction spoof's sunny, dumbass innocence.- Posted Nov 28, 2012
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
The leads here aren't the only element of the film that's past its prime.- Posted Jan 30, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Would You Rather has one major asset in an appropriately gothic, larger-than-life performance by Jeffrey Combs, the great, chameleon-like character actor best known for playing a mad scientist in "Re-Animator."- Posted Feb 6, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
An abysmal sequel that abandons the found-footage concept, along with the pockets of wit and originality that made its predecessor salvageable.- Posted Mar 1, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Sam Adams 25
Part of Snoop’s protean quality comes from the fact that his rhymes only cut so far: He can pivot freely because he’s never dug in too deep.- Posted Mar 13, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 25
Nearly everything that happens in Olympus Has Fallen is ludicrous, yet because the fate of the president and the nation hangs in the balance, the crisis is treated with the gravitas of Paul Scofield at the West End.- Posted Mar 20, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Mike D'Angelo 25
A dismal erotic thriller that was originally called "Boot Tracks."- Posted Apr 3, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Critic Score 25
Its comedic side never bites, and its moral side is painfully one-dimensional. A little to the left and The Brass Teapot might’ve been mean-spirited fun; a little to the right and it could play on The Hallmark Channel. For a movie with such an outlandish premise, it’s remarkably dull.- Posted Apr 3, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Scary Movie 5 aspires to timeliness, but its comic sensibility is so groaningly retro that the film features a series of tributes to The Benny Hill Show and its signature ditty, “Yakety Sax.”- Posted Apr 12, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 25
Any pretensions of satire, moral ambiguity, or social commentary get lost in a hurricane of empty, mindless spectacle.- Posted Apr 24, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 25
A couple of halfway decent action scenes do little to distract from the story’s mounting ludicrousness—two words: adamantium bullets—or a conclusion that’s only a little more satisfying than a projector breakdown. Maybe.- Posted May 1, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
A.A. Dowd 25
How bad is No One Lives, the new bottom-feeding schlock-fest from WWE Studios? Simply put: It’s bad enough to make some of the studio’s other offerings, like the Steve Austin deathmatch movie "The Condemned" and the Kane-starring slasher flick "See No Evil," look like genre gems.- Posted May 8, 2013
- Read full review
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Debrauwer's characterization is as sharp and incisive as a butter knife. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Relies on the most time-tested basic moves of farce for laughs that just don't come. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Spears is filmed and costumed in such a harsh, unflattering manner that it looks like Christina Aguilera bribed the crew to make her rival look as hideous as possible. Spears' ubiquity has spawned an inevitable backlash, but the awful Crossroads ought to do more harm to her career than even the most powerful Britney-basher. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Despite her healthy fan base, Notorious C.H.O. looks like the dead-end to a limited repertoire. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
It essentially uses the setup of an early Dick short story as a bookend to one long, dull chase scene. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
A mess, a poorly paced, poorly structured, lukewarm comedy-drama that fails even to capitalize on the cheap nostalgia inherent in its plot. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Major characters drop in and out of sight, WWII begins and ends without much fanfare, and full decades pass in the space of a few cuts. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Even if the time were somehow right for a madcap comedy about terrorists, What To Do In Case Of Fire would still look pretty lousy. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
A tone of lurid idiocy permeates Trapped, a Z-grade woman-in-peril thriller starring scenery-chewing Kevin Bacon. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Never good, Crush takes a turn for the worse when it takes a turn for the serious. Its attempt to drop cartoon comedy for cartoon tragedy essentially thrusts the characters from Cathy into the panels of Mary Worth. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Schwartzman steals Slackers without much effort, but it's not worth the theft. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
It's hard to fathom what they intended for this forgettable group of lonelyhearts, other than to choreograph a whopping 14 happy endings at once--all of them forced, none of them earned. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Dylan's performance doesn't offer any clues. He's an icon and he delivers an icon's performance, literally: He could easily have been replaced by piece of wood with his face painted on it. That distance also means he remains more or less untouched by the embarrassment going on around him, even though it's largely his own creation. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Sadly, it's yet another intercultural mishmash that hopes for its iconic star's charisma to overcome a dire script, cardboard characters, indifferently directed action scenes, and an atrocious villain buried under layers of unconvincing old-man makeup. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Extreme Ops seems to have only the slightest grasp of its own absurdity (or its own horribleness), which makes it almost charming. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Noel Murray 20
Their attempts at wit seem forced, and the overall point of each installment is too minor to spend nearly 30 minutes exploring. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Only those attracted to "Waterworld" or "Last Action Hero" level big-budget disasters need bother with this one. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
The worst Hanukkah movie ever made, Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights does for the holiday what "Santa Claus: The Movie" did for Christmas. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
It's not the implausibility of its plot, the shallowness of its characters, its funereal pace, its tenuous understanding of teenage behavior, its commercial-ready TV-movie-style direction, or the fact that Pfeiffer and Williams may be the most implausible Italian-Americans since James Caan -- the film is most undone by its near-complete lack of genuine drama. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Parlavecchio is kind of an asshole, and that–along with the stilted dialogue, clueless portrayals of women, and the fact that much of the plot has been lifted from Tom Perrotta's terrific novel "The Wishbones"–ranks among the film's main problems. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Perhaps due to the talent of everyone involved, Dreamcatcher moves with an oddly exhilarating awfulness that sets it apart from more run-of-the-mill horror films, which lack the imagination and budget to be so thoroughly misconceived. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Anyone older than eight is likely to find it a ridiculously extravagant exercise in stupidity. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Ritchie's frivolous comedy tries to have it both ways, thinning out the material for mass consumption while still sticking to the script -- an unstable alchemy that backfires horribly. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Made with just enough craft to keep it from being the instantly dated camp howler its title promises, but it's quickly apparent that there's no thought or originality under its grim, familiar surface. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Looks like a video-game promo, has a story that plays like the fifth episode of a struggling syndicated action show, and feels like a headache waiting to happen. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Perhaps Lee took a look at the script -- saw all the jokes about diarrhea, pubic lice, drunk old ladies, and drugged gravy, and thought, "Why bother?" Looking at the final results, it's hard to feel any other way. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Reynolds and Reid's white-bread romance begs to be left on the cutting-room floor, but then again, so does just about every other scene in Van Wilder, which distinguishes itself only in featuring a level of ejaculate rarely found outside of hardcore porn. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Directed without a shred of imagination by Denzel Washington -- Antwone Fisher masks a behind-the-scenes story that's far more inspiring than the phony uplift that makes it onto the screen. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Big Fat Liar's screenplay, co-written by Robbins and fellow Head Of The Class alumnus Dan Schneider, is a model of comic inefficiency. Like a Rube Goldberg contraption, it goes to excruciating, wildly implausible lengths for the flimsiest of payoffs. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Wasted comedy ringers Eugene Levy and Cheri Oteri co-star. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Either a thoroughly incomprehensible movie or a daring exercise in the cinema of disorientation, and a painful viewing experience either way. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
It's hard to imagine a more ill-advised choice of source material. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Essentially "Bring It On" minus the effervescence, star power, energy, and brisk pace -- in other words, everything that made it bearable. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
An uncomfortable-looking Lee soldiers doggedly through a thankless role, while Green, though never particularly funny, at least brings off-kilter energy to a role that provides Stealing Harvard's only spark of spontaneity. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
A grimy mess set among L.A.'s speed-abusing "tweakers," Salton has neither the substance to justify first-time feature director D.J. Caruso's pretentious flourishes, nor the skill to make those flourishes work on their own terms. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Estela Bravo's disgraceful documentary Fidel could have been financed by the man himself. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Garai's flowery, overwritten narration proves irritating in the movie's first half, then unfortunately sets the tone for a fatal second-half descent into soap operatics, dippy dialogue, and airless melodrama. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 20
Doesn't have much to offer viewers who aren't still eagerly awaiting their first adult tooth. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Director Shawn Levy brings a yeoman-like joylessness to the project, spoiling whatever fun might have been had. Kutcher and Murphy seem game enough, and it's a testament to their charisma that they're the hardest element of the film to hate. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
It's like a cross between "Heathers" and "Waiting For Guffman," had those movies been made by morons, for morons, and the cinematic equivalent of cow-tipping, only less graceful. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Tasha Robinson 20
Audience members are likely to feel like they're right there in the picture, suffering for no reason and trying to pretend it's funny. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Craven's name doesn't appear anywhere in the credits of the film otherwise known as They. That's fitting, too, since even the worst Craven-directed movies have a lot more going for them than this painfully familiar bit of oogum-boogum. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Myers returns as his menagerie of repulsive characters, but this time, his frantic mugging feels more like an insipid parlor trick than ever. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Awash in cheap shocks and corny sentiment, Dragonfly aspires to be an inspirational thriller about one man's spiritual journey, but it takes little time for him to reach his destination. All that's left for him and the audience to do is solve a riddle unfit for the back of a cereal box. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
While “Final Destination” was gimmicky enough, its sequel begins with the same flawed premise, then piles on layers of contrivances until it reaches a level of implausibility rarely seen outside of films pitting giant radioactive monsters against each other. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
A singularly uncharismatic leading man, the paunchy, expressionless, frequently inarticulate Sigel makes an unintentionally comic impression as a character named, naturally, Beans. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Clayburgh and Tambor demonstrate genuine chemistry, but the film keeps diluting it with awful attempts at comedy and worse attempts at drama. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
A nasty black comedy whose relentlessly glossy exterior recalls both Araki and John Waters without the wit or smarts of either...As a black comedy, Jawbreaker has one major flaw: It's not funny. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Includes a few half-hearted ironies about how people are really serving dogs, not the other way around, but even those gags are cribbed from a retired Seinfeld routine. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Much poorly choreographed gunplay, many lovingly rendered head explosions, and some half-assed exposition about centuries-old, immortality-seeking pirates follow, with nothing to recommend House Of The Dead to anyone but the most undiscriminating zombie-movie fans. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Send a check to UNICEF and go see "Lost In Translation," "Mystic River," or "Kill Bill" instead. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Mean-spirited and stagy where "Psycho Beach Party" was cinematic and charming, Die, Mommie, Die recycles gags from Busch's screenwriting debut--from transparently phony rear projection to a character's crippling constipation--and the law of diminishing returns kicks in pretty hard. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
The Independent Film Channel is distributing Girls Will Be Girls; perhaps its executives failed to realize that this kind of mirthless, tacky independent film sends traumatized audiences racing back to the glossy production values on display at the local multiplex. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Torque has a sense of humor about itself, but the laughs stick in the throat. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
A bad-movie-lover's heaven, and a good-movie-lover's hell. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Stranding an able supporting cast in mostly disposable roles--including Jacqueline Bisset, Mary Kay Place, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Amber Benson--Cox writes himself into several corners, then plots honking contrivances to get out of them. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
There's "so bad it's good," but there's also "just plain bad," and Skeleton's pre-processed shittiness spoils the fun. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Beloved has an almost gut-wrenching quality to it. But the same can't be said for the movie overall--it's a noble, ambitious failure, but a failure nonetheless. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Celebrity is a waste, a tedious and depressingly routine film by a filmmaker on a steep, possibly permanent artistic decline. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
The Big Hit goes beyond the call of duty in terms of hateful, crass exploitation. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
Gibson makes sure that no blow remains unfelt, and his approach can't help but stir the body, but he never touches the soul. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
There's not a relationship in He Got Game that feels right, especially the one between Washington and Allen, and if that doesn't work, neither does the film. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Swarming with zombies on both sides of the camera, the film is unrelentingly relentless, leaving no room for original director George Romero's wry satire on consumerism or his slow-paced, creeping undead. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Urban Legend has an undeniably clever premise, which plays on a sort of cultural mythology shared by the filmmakers and the ostensibly media-savvy audience, but it fails to do anything interesting with it. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
It's a worthless bit of low-grade satire that's as sophisticated and entertaining as a pile of twigs. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
Adored stands at the crossroads where Telemundo and beefcake magazines collide, but for strangers to that intersection, the film's camp value is exceeded only by its tedium. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
It mostly serves as a warning to stay away from future films involving director Nick Hamm and screenwriter Mark Bomback. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
In the midst of this comic black hole, only Snoop Dogg and Method Man emerge unscathed, as even material this bad can't mask their languid, long-limbed charisma. -
-
-
Critic Score 20
It doesn't help that, at 80 or so minutes, it feels like there's a reel missing—you know, the one with the finale that's even slightly more pulse-pounding than any of the four or five other scenes in which the big, impressive-looking monster attacks the heroes as their legs dangle in the water. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
There's hardly a character, plot twist, or musical theme in the whole enterprise that isn't primed to go straight for the tear ducts, as if Johnson assumes that his audience is incapable of mounting a defense. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
The film could have turned out worse, but only via the addition of a Tom Green cameo, or an accident in which the actors caught on fire. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Deconstructing Harry is a mess: a shambling, narcissistic, sexist romp that is, worst of all, almost entirely devoid of laughs. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
When the CGI snakes finally arrive, they look like they've just returned from a guest spot on "Charmed;" if the film had cut any more corners, it would have had to borrow graphics from an old Intellivision game. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
It sends a bad message to the film's young audience that the daughter of a world leader needn't be more than a vapid bikini-stuffer. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Keith Phipps 20
This vanity project belongs to an audience of one. -
-
-
Reviewed by
Nathan Rabin 20
Meet The Fockers has assembled a historic, once-in-a-lifetime cast, then stranded them in the laziest, most mercenary kind of sequel imaginable. It's like the 1927 Yankees taking on the Special Olympics softball team. -
-
-
-
Reviewed by
Scott Tobias 20
The whole three-ring circus winds up in a church for a redemptive finale, but by then, Diary has committed too many sins for even the most generous soul to offer salvation. -
-
-
Critic Score 20
By violating the law of show-don't-tell, the already shaky Murder At 1600 is lost beyond hope of redemption. -
