The Dissolve's Scores

  • Movies
For 1,480 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 35% higher than the average critic
  • 6% same as the average critic
  • 59% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 7.9 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 55
Highest review score: 100 Safe
Lowest review score: 0 The Cobbler
Score distribution:
1480 movie reviews
  1. Alejandro González Iñárritu is a pretentious fraud, but it’s taken some time to understand the precise nature of his fraudulence.
  2. Sincerity and good intentions are all it has going for it, alas, and the result is the cinematic equivalent of a plate full of spinach.
  3. The bigness of Mann’s performance can’t help but set the film’s tone, which goes manic and high-strung to the point of hysteria before settling down and becoming really stupid and gross.
  4. Afternoon Delight is one of those bad films that seem to drift further and further away from a recognizable reality the more we get to know it.
  5. Even Neeson can’t rescue this halfhearted shrug of a movie.
  6. Young Ones looks promising in the early going, when it’s relying on Shannon’s customary intensity and building its harsh, arid world. (Principal photography took place in South Africa.) Shannon quickly disappears, though, and that’s when the dreary plot kicks in.
  7. Barbarash doesn’t do much to compensate for the misshapen script, either. Fumbling camerawork and incoherent editing rob the film’s generous fight sequences of their oomph, and amateurish green screen hobbles a car-chase sequence.
  8. It’s stale B-movie rubbish of a barely watchable sort, albeit slightly more depressing than many of its genre compatriots.
  9. Charlie Countryman feels like the cinematic equivalent of a dodgy first novel, the kind authors write when they’re young and full of romance, hubris, and pretension—then look back on later in life with something approaching mortification.
  10. The impression left by Harmontown is that the podcast and the tour are feeding the beast, worsening a pathology that casts him as the “mayor” of whatever stage he happens to be occupying at the moment.
  11. Neither Grossman’s uninspired staging nor the performances help much.
  12. Planetary’s message is repetitive without being enlightening, and the film and its assorted participants insist on hitting the same beats without pause, until the concept loses all meaning.
  13. Ribald yet frantically unfunny, it wears out its welcome within the first five minutes, and never comes close to gaining it back. It feels like an alternately flat and flailing television pilot for a bro-comedy no one in their right mind would ever pick up.
  14. Premature isn’t nearly as inventive and witty as Groundhog Day or Edge Of Tomorrow about finding fresh angles on repeating events, and it overestimates how much the audience might care about the self-improvement of a bland, clueless douchebag.
  15. The film aims for twee, but lands on torturous. It’s narcissism blown up to a global scale, in the guise of a quirky voyage of self-discovery.
  16. First-time director Nate Taylor, who has a background in editing, gives Forgetting The Girl impressive technical polish, but the performances he gets from his young, unknown cast are strictly amateur-hour.
  17. The result is a relentlessly dour film livened up only by Bardem’s shameless scenery-chewing and the occasional jolt of action. Otherwise, it’s an endless frown of a movie that does little but confirm that Penn’s talents, while impressive, aren’t limitless.
  18. No doubt a decent movie could have been made about the behind-the-scenes life of CBGB, but CBGB isn’t it. It’s as flip about the club as it is about Kristal, the music, and the time and place that shaped it all.
  19. This kind of dully formulaic filmmaking accomplishes little more than congratulating viewers for caring enough about historical atrocities to watch.
  20. Although the film is supposedly about movement, Growing Up And Other Lies frequently stalls out, and whole patches of it grind on without momentum or purpose.
  21. After The Ball commits its most garish faux pas in rooting its plot in the thorny politics of high fashion, despite an apparent lack of any understanding of how the business works.
  22. Though light on drama, Apple’s scenes at the shelter are easily the best part of the film, among the few moments when Gimme Shelter decides to show the effect of faith and charity rather than simply preach it.
  23. Dolphin Tale 2 makes audiences wade through endless oceans of tedium for those scattered, fleeting moments of grace.
  24. The film isn’t remotely funny or insightful enough to justify spending an hour and a half in such intensely disagreeable company.
  25. There’s something deeply depressing about a debut film centered on fading talent, but even more depressing are the downright amateurish insights it musters about youth, the art world, and the burdens of growing up gifted.
  26. As bluntly unimaginative as its title.
  27. There are no casual conversations in The Citizen, and no idle moments. It’s pushing its agenda at every moment, first gently, then relentlessly.
  28. Brill’s point that there should be no such thing as a “walk of shame” is a good one, but he lacks the conviction to see it through honestly—or humorously.
  29. Gomez-Rejon has erected a gleaming shrine to adolescent narcissism.
  30. Phantom Halo is overstuffed even before Bogdanovich starts layering in the soliloquies and comic book metaphors.

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