TV Guide's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
For 5,168 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 48% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 49% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 2.2 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 59
Highest review score: 100 King Kong
Lowest review score: 0 Terror Firmer
Score distribution:
5,168 movie reviews
  1. No one expects a light teen romance to be "Madame Bovary," but this is Colorforms filmmaking.
  2. The film isn't even enjoyably sleazy: It's just dumb and tacky.
  3. This big-budget bore looks lovely but is so miscalculated that you can't help but wonder whether anyone involved had ever seen the original.
    • 12 Metascore
    • 0 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    You'd have to be more than merely intoxicated to find anything about this dismal stoner comedy remotely funny. You'd have to be unconscious.
    • 12 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    In fact, with no fewer than 17 of Donaldson's favorite rock songs and a complete lack of dramatic impetus, Cocktail would fare better as an extended-play music video.
  4. Not clever. Not scary. Not funny.
  5. The gags are familiar collegiate stuff, involving horny young men, horny old whores -- horny young tramps -- silly foreigners, uptight authority figures, homosexuals and sassy fat women.
    • 12 Metascore
    • 30 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    There are worse movies, but that's no excuse. Rarely has so much money delivered so little entertainment.
  6. Painfully unfunny and misguided to boot.
  7. Crass, trashy and none-too-funny comedy.
  8. This picture is just shapeless and shrill. It's disposable, forgettable and aimed at an audience that doesn't care.
  9. This tedious hodgepodge of martial-arts mayhem, bogus mysticism and computer-generated special effects doesn't even pretend to have a plot.
    • 11 Metascore
    • 25 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    The choice is yours: Shell out 10 bucks for this dire spoof of recent romantic comedies a la "Scary Movie" and "Not Another Teen Movie", or toss your 12-year-old nephew a quarter and get him to act out scenes from his favorite movies for 80 minutes: The entertainment value will be about the same.
    • 11 Metascore
    • 40 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    There's no getting past the shockingly poorly dubbed voice work of the English speaking cast; Meyer's voice is particularly shrill and grating.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 25 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    At well over two hours it's merely exhausting, and the constant evocation of the fearsome power of "The Lodge," which proves Pat's salvation (Nwamu is himself a Freemason), is as silly-spooky as the White and Black Lodge hokum of "Twin Peaks."
    • 10 Metascore
    • 30 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    A misconceived roundelay that crosses the thin line dividing gross-but-funny from just plain gross.
  10. This amateurish comedy features some amazing sequences shot in Moscow. But everything else about it is second rate.
  11. The story's broad strokes are painfully clichéd and its details make no sense at all.
  12. Entirely too convoluted for kids and implausible even by the standards set by the original concept.
    • 9 Metascore
    • 30 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    Too lazy to play your own d--- video game? Lucky for you there's horror director-for-hire Uwe Boll, who's making a career out of adapting successful Atari and Sega games into tedious popcorn fare that's the ultimate in cinematic passivity.
  13. The musical number that runs during the closing credits funnier than anything that precedes it, which isn't saying much.
  14. The lighting and makeup are exceptionally harsh; all the women look shockingly rough beneath their garish makeup.
  15. Formulaic but performed with some verve.
    • 8 Metascore
    • 20 Reviewed by
      Ken Fox
    Filled with long, obviously improvised pseudo-philosophical ramblings about nothing -- and that's before the drugs kick in.
    • 7 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    Certainly, it's gross, and maybe even a bit shocking, but these filmmakers are smart enough to realize that raising the bar on crassness in teen sex comedies is a zero sum game.
  16. As bad as the title, and much longer.
  17. Preposterous, disingenuous, remarkably unfunny and genuinely distasteful.
    • 6 Metascore
    • 30 Critic Score
    Formulaic and deeply unfunny.
  18. This is sorry stuff.
  19. Production values are low -- though, mercifully, the sound recording is clear -- and overall the project smacks of juvenile hijinks.

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