Average User Score: 9.2Mar 22, 2015This game has aged horribly. The story is rather decent, but the gameplay is just pathetic. Shoot your peashooter weaponry at guards andThis game has aged horribly. The story is rather decent, but the gameplay is just pathetic. Shoot your peashooter weaponry at guards and zombies, and then use your gravity gun to pick up a saw and throw it at people.
You will then take the saw with you on your entire game and use it exclusively.
Sure, you can argue that a game that has a good story is all that matters. But, a sandwich with the world's best bread (the story) is still a horrible sandwich is the meat is made out of a dead dog's **** (the gameplay)
As it stands, Half Life 2 is a prime example that gamers will reach to the bottom of their fanboy purses to make anything Valve makes overrated.
This game would be better fitted as a book, to be honest. It tells a great story, but the gameplay is just so agonizing that I couldn't get past 40 minutes. If you want a good first person shooter, go play Far Cry or Call of Juarez: Gunslinger. Don't buy into the hype about this relic. It was good when it launched, but it's just dog **** that's beloved by nostalgia-blinded neckbeards who have probably never gotten to 1st base.
By the way, this review is going to get a lot of flak for not worshipping a game this overrated. Just some foresight.… Expand
Average User Score: 7.8Mar 22, 2015(JUST A NOTE: Any reviews claiming that the game doesn't run well are rendered moot now, as the game has been polished and refined to run MUCH(JUST A NOTE: Any reviews claiming that the game doesn't run well are rendered moot now, as the game has been polished and refined to run MUCH better. Film grain can be turned off, which was probably the biggest trouble the game has going for it.)
Short TL;DR: Buy for the visceral melee combat, the amazing parkour and the beautiful graphics. Not for story.
This game is probably the best game I've played since 2013. The combat is visceral, enjoyable and immersive. The parkour flows well and is useful compared to just running down the street. But, to be special, I'll make a bit of a list.
Gameplay: Guns are nothing to write home about. Use them on bandits, use them on missions, keep them in your infinite pack otherwise. The melee combat is awesome, however. Melee weapons have impact. While the elemental weapons don't make the game very realistic, it makes it fun. Smashing a zombie with an Impact modded baseball bat only to send him through the window of the house next door is so satisfying. Zapping a zombie with a lightning pipe never gets old, either.
The Parkour is the best part of this game to me. It flows better than Mirror's Edge, keeping the pacing and flow of Mirror's Edge and getting rid of the painful head bob while parkouring. Climbing ledges, jumping from roof to roof and smashing a zombie in the face work together like a chicken breast and the world's best barbecue sauce in existence.
The story itself is rather generic and predictable with the unoriginal "chaos rules all" antagonist from Far Cry 3 without the charm and wit. Or the insanity.
Overall, this game is a very solid purchase if you want to dump 70 hours into dashing from roof to roof smashing **** up. Better parkour than Assassin's Creed, better combat than Sleeping Dogs and a more immersive environment than GTA V. It does demand quite a bit out of your computer, but any console or $600+ computer (provided you didn't build it yourself) should be able to pull off a solid 30+ FPS. Even at the lowest graphics, the game is beautiful.
Also, the easter eggs range from rather amusing to both hysterical and highly useful as well. There is a certain grenade easter egg that makes zombies float into the air, and then smash down into the ground like the guy from Star Trek warped away their bones. It never stops being funny.
I didn't mention Be the Zombie mode, either. It's a decent little extra, but it needs bit of balancing. I got a good 7 hours on it. Fun with friends, not so much with pubbies.… Expand
Average User Score: 3.6Mar 22, 2015This game is like Payday 2, but with less awesome music and more open-ended murder.
It's hard to call this a cops and robbers game where it'sThis game is like Payday 2, but with less awesome music and more open-ended murder.
It's hard to call this a cops and robbers game where it's mostly just guys in ski masks and guys in tactical vests running around shooting eachother.
NOBODY plays heist, which is the only objective-based game beyond Hotwire.
Hotwire itself is probably the most played game, and is interesting until people get their hands on rocket launchers.
It has enjoyable gunplay, but a very limited pool of guns that all feel the same. Reload animations are nice, to say a bit of a reverse nitpick.
Battlefield Hardline certainly isn't a BAD game, but it's just a repackage of Battlefield 4. It'd be a standalone game if **** actually happened. Instead, as I opened with, it's two opposing teams running around shooting eachother. The game itself is solid, but putting objective based gameplay that forces you to actually help the team in a Battlefield game is like putting a guinea pig in a ballet.
In short, again... Pick up Payday 2 if you want cops vs crims. Pick up GTA V if you want bloods vs crips, pick up Battlefield 4 if you want Battlefield. And bugs.… Expand
Average User Score: 7.0Dec 17, 2014By far and large the worst Halo game I've ever played. It's definitely in the top 5 worst shooters I have ever played. I loved Halo Reach andBy far and large the worst Halo game I've ever played. It's definitely in the top 5 worst shooters I have ever played. I loved Halo Reach and made sure to pre-order this game. It looked like it had promise.
Know who else looked like they had promise? Hitler. And look what happened because of him.
Halo 4 is a broken, boring pathetic mess that isn't worthy of a 0/10. The story is predictable, the final boss is.... a single quick time even that gives you 20 seconds to press the button, the controls handle like ass, and the game runs like it was programmed on Windows 95.
Sure, it has great graphics, but its horrid aesthetic makes it look like the fantasies of a bisexual 13 year old brony. I'm not kidding when I say that it took longer to install the **** game than it did to melt the disk in my microwave.
Not gonna be buying another 343 game after this pathetic **** mess.
The campaign is at least acceptable, but dear god.. The multiplayer. Halo has always thrived on being a unique experience. Thus, the "Combat Evolved" part of the first Halo's name. Now, it's more like "Halo: Call of duty RippedOff." Know why? It's a Call of Duty clone with a sci-fi skin, but it has vehicles. Unbalanced vehicles that are easily stronger than 7 assault rifles in one. Need proof? A railgun mounted truck than can instantkill almost any other vehicle from the end of the map with splash damage the size of a tank shell.
The guns all have no recoil, they are 3-4 hit kills but fire way too fast, sniper rifles are overpowered as **** there is a "killstreak" in the form of ordinance drops containing... more overpowered weapons!
It's Space CoD but badly executed. The matchmaking is worse than Titanfall's, as you'll have a team of level 1's up against a team of level 130's.
This isn't mentioning the hackers, either. Over the course of 5 games, I saw 8 hackers. 1 noclipper, 3 godmoders, 2 people spawning in weapons or items and 2 who just nuked the map. That's **** PATHETIC.
The soundtrack is a generic orchestra track ripped straight from Silence of the Lambs. I have sincerely seen flash games with better music. Spartan Ops, which is essentially just the campaign that removes story in order to make you move from point A to point B and shoot **** I learned more about Halo's backstory from one 3 minute cut scène than I did the entire 10 hour session of Spartan Ops.
Here's a bit of a TL;DR
Graphics: 7/10. Great graphics but ****ty aesthetic. I think this was the best part of the game.
Story: 6/10. Generic and boring BUT innovative and new.
Gameplay: 3/10. Go here, shoot thing. Nothing beyond this besides the occasional vehicle section with horrible controls. The UNSC vehicles feel like the tires are made out of liquid nitrogen, and the Covenant vehicles feel like there are no longer laws of physics. There are no forerunner vehicles, sadly. 343 was too cheap and just decided to rip all of its vehicles out of Reach, except for the aforementioned overpowered railgun truck of death.
Multiplayer: 000/10. One zero wasn't enough to describe this **** mess. ****ty matchmaking that has you waiting for 10 minutes to find a game among 3000 other players (it tells you how many people are online in a specific gamemode) repetitive and boring gameplay where the semi-auto and burst guns are overpowered, any explosive is ridiculously overpowered and sniper rifles are gamebreaking, overpowered vehicles, nonexistent objectives besides "Take this flag! It will help the UNSC cause for some reason."
I think Modern Warfare 3 did multiplayer better. This is inexcusable.
Dialogue: 6/10. No real complaints. A lot of the lines sounded like they were made by a 2 year old, but halo isn't about dialogue. We're here to kill aliens like the space KKK.
Soundtrack: 4/10. It works. It fits decently, but it isn't very good.
That's basically it. I'd take any FPS game over this pitiful excuse of a game made by a company that doesn't give a damn about its customers.
-Someone whose favorite console is the Xbox 360.
(If this were ported to PC, it'd get an 8/10. Less hackers, better controls, better frame rate, better community. You name it, PC could do it better.)
You know, I loved the first two halos to death. I personally think Halo: Combat Evolved is a **** masterpiece. So, I was disappointed to find that ODST was better than this. And ODST was some shiiiiit.
I'll have to do my research before I buy into another Halo game.
That, and hope I don't get matched up against a squad of hackers and a squad of people playing Halo 24/7.… Expand
Average User Score: 7.8Nov 28, 2014I really do love this game.
The news broadcasts made my laugh my ass off so many times. I'm serious when I say that this game has the bestI really do love this game.
The news broadcasts made my laugh my ass off so many times. I'm serious when I say that this game has the best political commentary in gaming history.
You take the form of one of many different types of plagues, and your goal is to **** **** up. But the humans don't want their **** ****ed up, so they will eventually discover you trying to **** **** up, and attempt to **** your **** up by curing your plague that will inevitably **** **** up anyways. The game is quite realistic, whereas countries will do everything in their power to attempt to avoid your **** **** up virus, such as distributing face masks, bombing their cities, and hosting kissing parties.
For 15 bucks, it's a great deal and it will last you some time. The only problem is the relative imbalance between certain viruses. For example, the **** **** up zombie virus is ridiculously overpowered, while the **** **** up fungus is extremely weak and unreliable. The game is heavily skill based, and the random event god has little to no influence. You may lose 5% efficiency in hot countries, but what's that do when you can turn people into **** fruit bats? It is definitely challenging at first when you have to take a Bacteria virus which is rather weak, but your very next virus is an overpowered plague simply known as a a "Virus" (you can still name it yourself) that gives you free boosts to your plague once every 30 seconds or so.
TL;DR: A surprisingly realistic game that portrays a global pandemic from the perspective of some alien who really loves to **** **** up or something. There's no story except for a few randomized in-game events that include but are not limited to; A space program, Spalin being elected and nuking Russia (spoilers) and a disrespectful funeral-goer forgetting to press F. I am dead serious. There are so many easter eggs, you're missing half the game if you don't read the news once an in-game week. Each in-game day is one IRL second by the way.
While it does need a few more features, this game is a great purchase that can occupy a lot of your time. It gets frequently updated with new, extremely original viruses such as a virus that turns people into Neanderthals, a monkey plague (They worked with the Planet of the Apes guys) a virus that turns people into dinosaurs, the black plague, Ebola, H1N1 (which is coincidentally named Extra Crispy Bacon due to its Swine Flu nature) and a few less creative others that only slightly impact your plaguing. Man, this is a long TL;DR.
Have fun ****ing **** up with a virus you've named "Outsourcing" or some silly name. The scientists are concerned about the affects of outsourcing on the human brain.… Expand
Average User Score: 7.4Nov 22, 2014If you happen to have a time machine handy, go back to 2010. Minecraft was at its best then. Now, in 2014, the game is flooded with content.If you happen to have a time machine handy, go back to 2010. Minecraft was at its best then. Now, in 2014, the game is flooded with content. So much so, that it's as thinly spread out as a jar of peanut butter over the Atlantic Ocean. It has too much going for it, which kills the game as a whole. It only stands up for the complete stupidity of the "vanilla" or original mode with its absolutely MASSIVE modding community. But, if your game relies on mods to attract a crowd, you might as well head on over and sign up for Roblox, you illiterate ****
TL;DR: A depressingly **** game that killed itself over time by saturating its content to the point of complete boredom. I can't go longer than 10 minutes playing this before I realize just how interesting my ceiling looks, a sign of true boredom. Consider this a platform to hold up mods, rather than a game and you can give it a solid 6/10. But, since this is a game, 2/10, you **** RIP Minecraft, an excellent game killed by oversaturation of content and a community that somehow beats out Call of Duty in the category of ****ty **** for ****s.
Good if you need your spoiled ****face 10 year olds to shut up, otherwise, don't recommend. Want a real sandbox? Go play DayZ or something.… Expand
Average User Score: 8.2Nov 22, 2014This game is absolutely amazing. The controls are tight, the gameplay is fast-paced and well made, and the story is fabulous. Arcade mode isThis game is absolutely amazing. The controls are tight, the gameplay is fast-paced and well made, and the story is fabulous. Arcade mode is fun, and CoJ doesn't rely on gimmicks to drive the gameplay. For 15 dollars, this game is a complete steal. Its only flaw is the lack of replay value. The only form of "replay" aspect is a new-game+ like what Batman: Arkham Origins did. You keep your skills from the last run, but enemies get stronger? I never really noticed. Towards the end of the game, you get to be ridiculously overpowered, having the game autoaim for you and rack up headshots like aimbot in Modern Warfare 2. But, the game takes 10-15 hours to complete, arcade mode will add up to about 5 hours, and this makes Call of Juarez: Gunslinger the underrated gem that it is. While the game does lack setpieces and prefers a lead-throwing romp playstyle, it is executed so well that it's easily forgivable.
Pick this game up for its normal value, DEFINITELY pick it up if it's on sale. This could knock out a weekend.
It's no game that'll last you forever like Payday 2 or Terraria, but it can definitely be revisited if you feel like dumping a day into some damn good gunslinging. Oh, and the voice acting is badass.… Expand
Average User Score: 8.3Nov 17, 2014If any game were to show how you would survive an apocalypse, this would. Not DayZ, not H1Z1, This War of Mine.
The game follows an almostIf any game were to show how you would survive an apocalypse, this would. Not DayZ, not H1Z1, This War of Mine.
The game follows an almost roguelike story of a group of 3 survivors trapped in a ramshackle house. A civil war rages, threatening to tear the city apart by the seams. But, this isn't part of your little world. You focus only on the survival of your pieces of 1's and 0's called survivors and the status of other 1's and 0's called NPC's. One problem: The game lacks ambience. The only sounds are the occasional gunshot or mortar blast in the background, or the characters droning on and on about the same thing.
It may be odd how I mention that the characters are all pieces of binary, but it's because the game makes you so damn attached to them. You'll develop stories about how your obese crackhead drunk killed off 5 bandits with a pistol and a broken bottle, or how you saved a skinny 10 year old from starvation. The game immerses you in its situation like a black hole in a mirror. This game is hard to describe, so I'll put it the way I understand it best. If you've ever seen a player in DayZ, you know that there's a certain morality to the encounter. You think to yourself "Should I kill this innocent survivor for his tin of beans," or "Should I trade my spare medicine for a few precious Mosin rounds" or even "When should I shoot him and spend the day wiping the brain matter off his pack?" This War of Mine takes this, and amplifies it. Since you take the roll of a group of civilians and not crack military soldiers, your survivors are prone to what I like to call "PTSD Attacks". Say you kill a guy who notices you stealing his ganja. When you get back, your character will tell his friends "I feel bad. I had to kill a guy". This causes almost all of your survivors to enter a state of sadness or even depression, constantly saying "I know _____ HAD to kill him, but it still sucks" or "We're killing people now.. what have we become?" When this happened, I almost smacked myself in the face for even thinking of stealing from the man trying to nurse his ill grandparents back to health. This is everything about war except for war. It's like experiencing WWII from the perspective of a Russian civilian who has lost everything to the German offensive.
Sometimes, your characters will be so deeply troubled by their actions that they'll resort to smoking or drinking to ease the pain. This game is subtly realistic with the consequences of these actions, and it never pulls any punches. I think the only problem with This War of Mine is on a personal standpoint where it literally hurt to play because I knew that one **** up could destroy that delicate stack of cards, and most would land in a fireplace and burn me house down. This is ESPECIALLY true if you lose a talented scavenger. The game can only get a 9/10 because it's TOO punishing. If you lose a Scavenger in the field, you might as well start save scumming or just reset, because you're **** You'll lose a member of the team who could work during the day, who could scavenge during the night, and the morale of your survivors will plummet. Most will become alcoholics or drug addicts, and you will almost NEVER recover from it. It isn't realistic, it's unfair. Beyond that, the rest of the game is nice. Combat's a **** the controls are clunky and stealth feels unusual. If this had used Mark of the Ninja's stealth system, it would be the renaissance of 2D stealth 'em ups. But, between the punishment for death and the high chance of death in the field, the game falls a bit short. You don't come for the gameplay, you come for the interactive story. It's like a book you can interact with, except the book will leave a permanent scar in your brain. Gameplay isn't bad, but the story is definitely the main man in this emo carnival of a depressing game.
TL;DR A game of psychology where everything is out to damage your morality until you turn into a monster, physically, mentally and morally. One problem, though. The game lacks ambience, and the characters can get pretty stupid sometimes. I had a character put about 7 pieces of wood in the furnace to heat my guys up, and then he said "You could catch a chill it's so damn cold in here". 2 seconds later, he says "I'm glad it's not cold in here." I laughed so hard, until it happened about 9 more times within the next 2 hours. These are only minor, and take away very slightly from the immersion. But, if you can't get immersed to Terraria, how are you going to get immersed to a 2D game? It draws you in well, but you always feel like a spectator or a little imp on your characters backs telling them what to do. Still, a grand game that shows a Video Game's potential to deliver emotion on a Shakespearian level. To quote GLaDOS from Portal, "What have you become? You monster."… Expand
Average User Score: 8.2Nov 6, 2014An absolutely amazing game overall. The gameplay feels smooth, the animations are nice, the aesthetic fits the grim tone of the story, and theAn absolutely amazing game overall. The gameplay feels smooth, the animations are nice, the aesthetic fits the grim tone of the story, and the story is just legendary. It dethrones popular story-based titles like Bioshock and Portal without trying. While it may lack the replay value of games such as Dishonored, it's an amazing title that is on sale on steam at time of writing.
Buy this game.… Expand
Average User Score: 5.7Nov 3, 2014I never knew that Call of Duty needed to rip off a game made by its own **** developers. I'll give it credit for realizing that its ownI never knew that Call of Duty needed to rip off a game made by its own **** developers. I'll give it credit for realizing that its own formula was growing stale, though. This time, they decided to combine visuals that are so good they physically hurt to look at with gameplay snagged right out of Titanfall to create a masterful work of ****
Advanced Warfare may just well be the best Call of Duty game, if only because it tries to be Titanfall. Which was a damn good game, for all of its lack of content. It's just another call of duty run-and-gun antigravity mess, but now you can jump upwards like you've installed commando and attacked the sun, and you can dash to the side. Glad they're taking ideas from both Titanfall, and a flash game from 2001.
So, originality? Not exactly this game's finest. But, to be fair, it works. It's an acceptable game, and it met my low expectations.
TL;DR Literally painful visuals (It isn't **** cinematic, IGN, it looks like the characters have pedalbin trashcans on their heads when they talk. Their mouths flap open like god damn Goat Simulator.), an unoriginal concept that's executed in a boring way, gameplay that is now more **** and less predictable than CoD: Goats, and an acceptably made shooter overall.
Still, this does more than most games at disproving the theory that games can be considered art. I don't think that anyone made ye olde mad stacks by ripping off the Mona Lisa once every **** year.… Expand