Average User Score: 9.5May 27, 2015Cory in the House is an journey into the mind of a spiritually transcendent individual, living in the abode of America's most powerfulCory in the House is an journey into the mind of a spiritually transcendent individual, living in the abode of America's most powerful figurehead. Existentialism, social class, politics, and other abstract concepts that cannot be adequately described in the English vocabulary are addressed wonderfully in the game's revolutionary story line, with questions like "Why is Cory in the House?" and "What does it mean to be busta?" The graphics are unlike anything humanity has ever seen. The screenshots do not do Cory in the House's visuals justice; viewing them in motion will guarantee that your retinas experience nirvana. Sound-wise, Cory's tunes outclass any musical composition humankind has ever created. Beethoven's 9th and Sgt. Pepper don't compete to the dulcet, harmonious gift that Cory will grace your ears; he is certainly no busta. The gameplay incorporates and perfects every element that so-called "masterpieces" have come just short of mastering. Cory in the House is simply flawless. Buy Cory in the House. Don't be a busta. Being a busta is bad. I should know. The game told me so.… Expand
Average User Score: 2.7Jul 16, 2014I paid two dollars for this game and I still feel ripped off.
Right from the title screen one can immediately surmise what the quality ofI paid two dollars for this game and I still feel ripped off.
Right from the title screen one can immediately surmise what the quality of the game will be like; a badly Photoshopped logo, a blurry envelope .JPEG, and a tacky "Press + Button" bouncing from the top awaits you in the PowerPoint-esque title screen. The cheap looking loading screen headlines the game that awaits.
The Letter is a "walking simulator", as a lot of people would aptly put it. On the shop, it's advertised as a horror game, but there is literally nothing scary about it; most of its amateurish attempts to elicit fear are done through cheap ambient noise and a dark environment that feels more like an attribute to horrid pop-in than a spooky accompaniment.
The objective "varies" in each level, though that description would be giving this game too much credit; each of the game's three main levels (yes, only three) require the player to collect things. The first level, for example, puts you in a small room and requires you to find a letter (complete with lazy Times New Roman text that only further emphasizes the $337 budget put towards this game). If your fix for Times New Roman hasn't been satiated, don't worry, because the game's text box transitions and "hidden letters" that contribute to the game's back-story should fulfill that duty.
Speaking of which, the game's plot makes no sense and the items are only loosely tied into it, and even then, the plot gets completely invalidated at the end of the game anyway.
For a first-person game where you're main method of control is walking, the controls are inexcusably counter-intuitive. The deadzone for when the player character moves forward is borderline non-existent, which makes moving the tiniest bit to the left and right makes the character change direction; it sounds minute but gets annoying really fast. Even worse, however, are the look controls: left and right go left and right, but up and down go DOWN AND UP. I'm not even joking. The look controls are a twisted hybrid between normal and inverted, and it personally drove me up the wall when playing it. You can also jump, but you only use that for one thing in the whole game.
The game lasts less than a half hour if you're trying to explore, and if you know where everything is, you can easily beat it in less than five minutes. Bear in mind, about a minute and a half of that time is waiting, due to both the loading screens, and an endgame level where you do NOTHING BUT WAIT FOR 45 SECONDS.
The Letter feels like a fusion between Gone Home and Slender; unlike those two games, however, there is absolutely nothing redeeming The Letter. It lacks a decent plot like Gone Home and its attempt at atmosphere is completely outclassed by Slender (which in itself isn't even that scary to begin with). It's not scary, it's dreadfully short, it's inexcusably finicky to control, its concept isn't unique in the slightest, and even for its length, it feels like a waste of time. The Letter is not worth two dollars; it's not even worth one dollar; it shouldn't have even left development. Take that two dollars and do something else with it. I can assure you that something as inconsequential as a cheeseburger would still be a smarter and more satisfying purchase.… Expand
Average User Score: 1.3Jul 29, 2013Instead of focusing on everything that's wrong with this game, I'll focus on what's right with it: literally the one correct thing about theInstead of focusing on everything that's wrong with this game, I'll focus on what's right with it: literally the one correct thing about the game is that the "Ride to Hell" part is scarily accurate.… Expand
Average User Score: 2.2Jan 26, 2013All the Braves is one of the absolute worst offenders of microtransactions gaming has ever seen. It's possibly an even worse offender than TheAll the Braves is one of the absolute worst offenders of microtransactions gaming has ever seen. It's possibly an even worse offender than The War Z, which is pretty hard to do. Literally the entire game consists of you rubbing your phone's screen like you're relentlessly scratching a lottery ticket to attack enemies, which in turn is governed by an overly simplistic version of Final Fantasy's turn-based battle system. There is no non-linearity or adventuring to speak of; it's just battle after battle and so-on. The actual game is bad enough, but its reliance of microtransactions is what makes its very existence a potential offender of public decency. Literally every action in the game is governed by microtransactions, with only a few having free alternatives (all of which involving ludicrously long waiting times). Some enemies in the game require certain characters to defeat, and the only way you can get other characters is to pay money, and what makes even WORSE than that is that it's randomized, meaning that it can easily take you 35 payments to FINALLY get the character you want. What do you get out of it? A step closer to beating the game, but is it worth it? Hell no. This game isn't fun. It's not worth your hard-earned cash to purchase, and it sure as hell isn't worth it sustain.… Expand