Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen

Los Angeles Times Kevin Thomas

At a time when crassness and dumbing down pervade popular entertainment, especially movies aimed at youthful audiences, Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen dares to be smart.

Seattle Post-Intelligencer Ellen A. Kim

Only Carol Kane, hilarious in roller curls and wide tortoiseshell glasses, gets to sink her teeth into her role. At least for Lohan, "Confessions" is her stepping-off point. Now she has to find a film to be her "real" stage.

New York Daily News Jami Bernard

A safely sanitized comedy with an important message about loyalty and individuality, plays to Lohan's strengths and gives the target audience a chance to live it up vicariously.

The Hollywood Reporter Sheri Linden

Girls ages 6-14 will get a charge from the fashion show, animation effects and, to a lesser degree, the cartoonish antics. But like most adolescent histrionics, the pic's impact on adults will be limited to mild amusement alternating with annoyance.

The New York Times Dave Kehr

Modest, mildly engaging film.

TV Guide Angel Cohn

A pretty little package whose perfect, fairy-tale ending is just a little too neat, the film's colorful wrapping includes veteran actress Carol Kane's bizarre but enjoyable performance as the school's uptight drama teacher.

USA Today Claudia Puig

This junior chick flick merely reinforces superficial clichés one associates with female teens: petty fights, intense highs and lows, and self-absorption.

Entertainment Weekly Lisa Schwarzbaum

With no Jamie Lee Curtis as a volleying partner, though, Lohan's chipper energy is, like, so totally out of proportion given the colorless pliability of everyone around her.

The Onion (A.V. Club) Keith Phipps

Doesn't have a mean bone in its body, but it's so sloppily assembled that even Lohan's charm can't keep it together.

Chicago Reader Andrea Gronvall

A smart script by Gail Parent (Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman) boosts the first half of this comedy.

Empire Nick De Semlyen

Lola deserves detention; Lohan deserves better.

LA Weekly Scott Foundas

Welsh director Sara Sugarman and the great cinematographer Stephen Burum (Hoffa, The Untouchables) keep the visuals bouncing along in bright, primary-color-intensive fashion, but the movie has no real heart and even less soul.

Dallas Observer Gregory Weinkauf

Tethered to screenwriter Gail Parent's adaptation of Dyan Sheldon's novel, plus the demands of bigwig producers, it's a testament to Sugarman's artistry that she sustains her funky playfulness--a hallmark of her earlier work--throughout most of this film.

Variety Dennis Harvey

Minimally funny comedy feels like a Disney Channel pic that got boosted to theatrical after Lohan scored a hit opposite Jamie Lee Curtis in the "Freaky Friday" remake.

The Globe and Mail (Toronto) Rick Groen

I confess to a deep uncertainty about whether this can be rightly called a movie. A bunch of scenes, maybe... I confess to a cynical belief that Lola isn't actually a role but just a succession of costume changes.

Washington Post Desson Thomson

Even by Disney's formulaic standards -- is about as cut and dried as the phone book.

Washington Post Michael O'Sullivan

It's a silly, giggly piece of pink-colored fluff, as hyperactive as its heroine and as redolent of bubble gum and Love's Baby Soft cologne as Lola apparently is. Yet the superficial sweetness masks something rotten.

Village Voice Anya Kamenetz

Smug, sanitized fantasy.

Austin Chronicle Kimberley Jones

Another casualty of the uncomfortable branding so common to the teen genre, the same branding one sees in a film starring Hilary Duff, or Amanda Bynes, or the next sweet but bland blond actress that comes down the assembly line.

New York Post Lou Lumenick

Shlocky, sloppy and crass adolescent comedy.

San Francisco Chronicle Ruthe Stein

The movie [Sugarman] made gives little indication that she understands teen girls, dramatic or plain. Much of Confessions seems clueless and -- even worse for moviegoers of any age -- listless.

Chicago Tribune Robert K. Elder

It breaks director Billy Wilder's most important movie commandment: Thou Shall Not Bore. It's just not funny.

Boston Globe Wesley Morris

Every ounce of the film feels artificially upbeat.