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Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
Buena Vista Pictures / Walt Disney Pictures
FILM:
MPAA RATING: PG for mild thematic elements and brief language
Starring
Lindsay Lohan,
Alison Pill,
Barbara Mamabolo,
Carol Kane,
Megan Fox,
Adam Garcia,
Kyle Kassardjian,
and
Adam MacDonald and Eli Marienthal
Lola (Lohan) feels her life is simply not worth living when she moves with her family from every single thing on the planet that she loves (read: the Big Apple) and is plunked down in the middle of the cultural wasteland that is suburban New Jersey. How will this New York doll ever make it as a Jersey girl? (Disney)
| GENRE(S): |
Comedy
|
| WRITTEN BY: |
Gail Parent
Dyan Sheldon (book)
|
| DIRECTED BY: |
Sara Sugarman
|
| RELEASE DATE: |
DVD: July 20, 2004
Video: July 20, 2004
Theatrical: February 20, 2004
|
| RUNNING TIME: |
97 minutes, Color |
| ORIGIN: |
USA |
All critic scores are converted to a 100-point scale. If a critic does not indicate a score, we assign a score based on the general impression given by the text of the review. Learn more...
80
Los Angeles Times
Kevin Thomas
At a time when crassness and dumbing down pervade popular entertainment, especially movies aimed at youthful audiences, Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen dares to be smart.
58
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Ellen A. Kim
Only Carol Kane, hilarious in roller curls and wide tortoiseshell glasses, gets to sink her teeth into her role. At least for Lohan, "Confessions" is her stepping-off point. Now she has to find a film to be her "real" stage.
50
New York Daily News
Jami Bernard
A safely sanitized comedy with an important message about loyalty and individuality, plays to Lohan's strengths and gives the target audience a chance to live it up vicariously.
50
The Hollywood Reporter
Sheri Linden
Girls ages 6-14 will get a charge from the fashion show, animation effects and, to a lesser degree, the cartoonish antics. But like most adolescent histrionics, the pic's impact on adults will be limited to mild amusement alternating with annoyance.
50
The New York Times
Dave Kehr
Modest, mildly engaging film.
50
TV Guide
Angel Cohn
A pretty little package whose perfect, fairy-tale ending is just a little too neat, the film's colorful wrapping includes veteran actress Carol Kane's bizarre but enjoyable performance as the school's uptight drama teacher.
50
USA Today
Claudia Puig
This junior chick flick merely reinforces superficial clichés one associates with female teens: petty fights, intense highs and lows, and self-absorption.
42
Entertainment Weekly
Lisa Schwarzbaum
With no Jamie Lee Curtis as a volleying partner, though, Lohan's chipper energy is, like, so totally out of proportion given the colorless pliability of everyone around her.
40
The Onion (A.V. Club)
Keith Phipps
Doesn't have a mean bone in its body, but it's so sloppily assembled that even Lohan's charm can't keep it together.
40
Chicago Reader
Andrea Gronvall
A smart script by Gail Parent (Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman) boosts the first half of this comedy.
40
Empire
Nick De Semlyen
Lola deserves detention; Lohan deserves better.
40
LA Weekly
Scott Foundas
Welsh director Sara Sugarman and the great cinematographer Stephen Burum (Hoffa, The Untouchables) keep the visuals bouncing along in bright, primary-color-intensive fashion, but the movie has no real heart and even less soul.
40
Dallas Observer
Gregory Weinkauf
Tethered to screenwriter Gail Parent's adaptation of Dyan Sheldon's novel, plus the demands of bigwig producers, it's a testament to Sugarman's artistry that she sustains her funky playfulness--a hallmark of her earlier work--throughout most of this film.
40
Variety
Dennis Harvey
Minimally funny comedy feels like a Disney Channel pic that got boosted to theatrical after Lohan scored a hit opposite Jamie Lee Curtis in the "Freaky Friday" remake.
38
The Globe and Mail (Toronto)
Rick Groen
I confess to a deep uncertainty about whether this can be rightly called a movie. A bunch of scenes, maybe... I confess to a cynical belief that Lola isn't actually a role but just a succession of costume changes.
30
Washington Post
Desson Thomson
Even by Disney's formulaic standards -- is about as cut and dried as the phone book.
30
Washington Post
Michael O'Sullivan
It's a silly, giggly piece of pink-colored fluff, as hyperactive as its heroine and as redolent of bubble gum and Love's Baby Soft cologne as Lola apparently is. Yet the superficial sweetness masks something rotten.
30
Village Voice
Anya Kamenetz
Smug, sanitized fantasy.
30
Austin Chronicle
Kimberley Jones
Another casualty of the uncomfortable branding so common to the teen genre, the same branding one sees in a film starring Hilary Duff, or Amanda Bynes, or the next sweet but bland blond actress that comes down the assembly line.
25
New York Post
Lou Lumenick
Shlocky, sloppy and crass adolescent comedy.
25
San Francisco Chronicle
Ruthe Stein
The movie [Sugarman] made gives little indication that she understands teen girls, dramatic or plain. Much of Confessions seems clueless and -- even worse for moviegoers of any age -- listless.
25
Chicago Tribune
Robert K. Elder
It breaks director Billy Wilder's most important movie commandment: Thou Shall Not Bore. It's just not funny.
12
Boston Globe
Wesley Morris
Every ounce of the film feels artificially upbeat.
 The average user rating for this movie is 4.5 (out of 10) based on 33 User Votes
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