Half Past Dead

The Onion (A.V. Club) Nathan Rabin

So audaciously bad it's good, which is about as close to quality as Seagal is likely to get these days.

The Globe and Mail (Toronto) Ray Conlogue

A shoot-'em-up for cynical times. Its only asset is Seagal himself, and frankly, he's is getting a bit past it.

LA Weekly David Chute

The most exhilarating fight by far is an acrobatic wall climber between Ja Rule and Nia Peeples, choreographed by Hong Kong's Xin Xin Xong (The Musketeer) who, in terms of thrills per minute, is the movie's real star.

Chicago Tribune Michael Wilmington

What we get, while rarely boring, is a succession of senseless scenes bathed in formula-thriller blue light, full of blazing Uzis, exploding helicopters and sentimental male bonding.

USA Today Mike Clark

Steven Seagal's acting style is so minimal that we can almost believe a script that tells us that his character's near-death experience left him flatlined for 22 minutes.

New York Daily News Elizabeth Weitzman

The martial arts are well represented, the gentler arts -- like, for example, acting -- are not.

Boston Globe Wesley Morris

Brilliantly named Half Past Dead -- or for Seagal pessimists: ''Totally Past His Prime.''

New York Post Jonathan Foreman

Has the cheesy, deadened feel of a straight-to-cable film.

Village Voice Walter Dawkins

Morris Chestnut, known for his "Best Man"-style nice-guy roles, is surprisingly effective against type as the evil commando leader, but he's handcuffed by a script that never adequately explains his motivations.

Film Threat David Grove

Half Past Dead would’ve been a bad film without Seagal anyways, but he fails long before any of the other parts do.

TV Guide Maitland McDonagh

Sleek, pointless action picture.

Variety Robert Koehler

In recent years, Steven Seagal has been steadily losing any firm standing as even a B-grade actioner icon, and by the genre's most basic standards, he now displays a visible fatigue and lack of interest that proves deadlier than any of his hero's skills.

Seattle Post-Intelligencer Sean Axmaker

Call this one "Die Hard" on Alcatraz, and this time the "cuckoo crazy" maverick has got the homeboys on his side.

San Francisco Chronicle Mick LaSalle

About as weak a movie as can be made without actively trying.

Baltimore Sun Chris Kaltenbach

Stupid. Illogical. Simplistic. Pandering. And those are its good points.

Entertainment Weekly Bruce Fretts

When Seagal's undercover FBI agent Sascha Petrosevitch waddles into the big house wearing a do-rag and a billowing blue jumpsuit, it's the funniest jailhouse-flick scene since Gene Wilder's white-boy strut in ''Stir Crazy.''

Los Angeles Times Manohla Dargis

Absent one original moment and bathed in de rigueur steel blue punctuated by sporadic bursts of flaming orange, the movie is notable only for its creative approach to Seagal's bulky gracelessness: Not since "Apocalypse Now" has a film gone to such lengths to hide what its star looks like.

Dallas Observer Luke Y. Thompson

This lame hostage movie doesn't even deliver for Seagal fans.

Washington Post Michael O'Sullivan

Here, common sense flies out the window, along with the hail of bullets.

Chicago Reader J.R. Jones

Dismal.

The New York Times A.O. Scott

After several scenes of this tacky nonsense, you'll be wistful for the testosterone-charged wizardry of Jerry Bruckheimer productions, especially because Half Past Dead is like "The Rock" on a Wal-Mart budget. And the marked-down price tags are incredibly visible.

Chicago Sun-Times Roger Ebert

It goes through the motions of an action thriller, but there is a deadness at its center, a feeling that no one connected with it loved what they were doing.

Austin Chronicle Marrit Ingman

“This is just like a video game,” observes rapper-cum-actor Ja Rule, taking aim during one of the myriad firefights that comprise this lunkheaded, vaguely dystopic actioner. Man, is it ever.