Highwater
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  1. itsthelaw
    May 6, 2011
    1
    "Endless Summer" it is not. "Endless Ego" is what it should be called. Or maybe, "Endless Narration," or "Endless Amateur." Best alt-title? "Endless Bummer."

    Note to Dana Brown: In "Blade Runner: Director's Cut," Ridley Scott removed the narration to make it a solid movie. Please read this sentence again (addendum: get someone else to write for you. "Silent eloquence" is never a good phra    se to use. Preferably a real writer is a good choice).

    On interviews: stop telling us everything about the surfers. We can get a deeper understanding by listening to them. See previous paragraph. On the competition: the way it's explained to us is confusing and muddled. Read previous paragraph again. On cast: where the hell are the brown people? The surfers are 99% blond, caucasian and yet defined as locals? Worse: drawing comparisons to outsiders-taking-over-da-locals is insensitive and ignorant. I would rather watch a movie about why native Hawaiians don't often get those $2 million sponsorships. The high quality of the surf footage fails when paired with the use of student-film production values such as quick wipes, edits and freezes. The overlay graphic FX are embarrassing not only in their home movie quality but in content as well (really, who cares about the route between the elementary school and the beach?). Music: please stop. Please. Stop assaulting our ears with your hey-check-out-my-cool-playlist-that-makes-me-cool-now-right? music. If you're going to cue up rock classics, punk (with Hawaiian slack seemingly thrown in for good measure), then play that VHS of "The Big Lebowski" again.

    So if you ever get the hankering for "Highwater: Director's Cut" here's what to do: remove all narration. Stop using crap FX. Use music without lyrics in whatever style you like (pick one theme and stick with it). Cut all that grainy, re-sized video. It was never interesting. Let the interviewees speak for themselves and use that extra footage in place of the narration. Stop trying to be clever. It only annoys us and drives a wedge between you and the audience. Speaking of us vs. them, stop focussing so much on the tanned, white surfer with gold locks of hair and please remove any reference to John John as the "Tiger Woods of surfing." If you can't figure out why, then later for you, brah.

    Mahalo and Talofa    … Expand

Critic Reviews

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Metascore
51 out of 100

Mixed or average reviews - based on 6 Critics

Critic score distribution:
  1. Positive: 2 out of 6
  2. Mixed: 3 out of 6
  3. Negative: 1 out of 6
  1. New York Daily News
    Reviewed by: Elizabeth Weitzman
    60
    There are plenty of outrageous characters, several surfing celebrities and a few truly compelling stories.
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  2. New York Post
    Reviewed by: V.A. Musetto
    38
    A bland look at professional surfing.
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  3. Village Voice
    Reviewed by: Dan Kois
    70
    Sure to become a sacred text to surf-movie enthusiasts, but surprisingly watchable even for those who think "goofy-footing" is a new Southern hip-hop dance craze.
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