Metascore
18

Overwhelming dislike - based on 17 Critics

Critic score distribution:
  1. Positive: 1 out of 17
  2. Negative: 13 out of 17
Watch On
  1. A nose-bleeding mass murderer wears a mask that suggests Roger Ebert is knocking off a group of lifelong female friends.
  2. The slasher-movie genre may never die, but can't its perpetrators think up variations more clever than this by-the-numbers rehash?
  3. 25
    The dreary, direct-to-video quality of the script, acting and cinematography in this latest entry seemed to inspire more yawns than screams, and not a few titters.
  4. Doesn't contain a single scary or imaginative moment.
  5. Reviewed by: Jay Carr
    25
    A flagrantly retro example of a tired genre that would vanish in a puff of smoke if anger management classes were to enter the picture, or if it would ever occur to any one of its endless stream of victims to reach for a light switch before proceeding into a spooky place.
  6. 20
    Director Jamie Blanks "Urban Legend" appears to be carving himself a career making slasher movies for a new generation; unfortunately, he's in no way improving on the originals.
  7. Reviewed by: Dennis Harvey
    20
    Looking good but lacking much in the way of personality or gray matter -- rather like its characters -- Valentine is a straightforward slasher pic that's acceptably scary until a weak finale.
  8. 10
    Highly reductive and deathly dull slasher flick.
  9. 10
    It feels like both a joke and a turkey.
  10. Reviewed by: Gemma Files
    10
    Valentine simply mines the same tired, predictable slasher-movie vein as everything else he's (Blanks) done thus far. Send this one back unopened.
  11. Reviewed by: Cody Clark
    4
    Because so little of what occurs on-screen either engages or entertains, there's ample time for the boiler of your self-respect to build up quite a head of indignation at the forfeiture of your time, money, and (exceedingly minimal) cerebral exertion.
  12. Lacking the requisite post-"Scream" irony, the film is simply a package of gougings, stabbings, drillings and guttings, all tied up with a "twist" ending that anyone with a still-functioning brain could figure out in a matter of minutes.
  13. 0
    Valentine succeeds only in boring you to death.
User Score
8.7

Universal acclaim- based on 78 Ratings

User score distribution:
  1. Positive: 3 out of 6
  2. Negative: 2 out of 6
  1. chuckyo
    Aug 30, 2006
    7
    There isn't anything original about the movie, but it's still fun. Also, Denise Richards looks incredible in this film, and her There isn't anything original about the movie, but it's still fun. Also, Denise Richards looks incredible in this film, and her scenes are great. Full Review »