Rolling Stone's Scores

For 2,418 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 60% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 38% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 3 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 65
Highest review score: 100 Truly Madly Deeply
Lowest review score: 0 Playing for Keeps
Score distribution:
2,418 movie reviews
  1. It could have been crazy-good trash.
  2. Stephen Rodrick's New York Times article about the making of The Canyons had humor, suspense and propulsion. They should have made that movie. What we have here is dead on arrival.
  3. A movie utterly devoid of wit , excitement and any reason for being.
  4. This movie isn't over-the-top -- it doesn't know where the top is. Trash addicts will eat up every graphic minute, even if they prefer to wait for the DVD.
  5. There’s not a real or spontaneous minute in it.
  6. Jonah is fated to ride alone. Don't make the mistake of keeping him company.
  7. Audiences forced to endure the 109 coma-inducing minutes of Serena should bring an e-book or a soft pillow.
  8. Result? It's not scary, just busy.
  9. The Expendables 3, trading on our affection for action stars of the past, has officially worn out its already shaky welcome.
  10. Here's a comedy of punishing tedium that pretends to be hip when it's so five minutes ago.
  11. Something cold and mechanical has seeped into the sequel. The divas push so hard for fun, it kills the spontaneity that fun needs to breathe.
  12. "Irritating" doesn't begin to describe Julia Roberts as Katherine, an art-history prof who arrives at Wellesley in 1953.
  13. Feels fake, forced and indigestible.
  14. "Sixth Sense" rip-off.
  15. The perfect summer movie, that is if you're eight years old or under. For the rest of us, the sequel to the first "Fantastic Four" that miraculously amassed more than $150 million in 2005, is a plotless, brainless, witless bore.
  16. "Your incompetence is most taxing," says the chief vampire (Bill Nighy). A line that pretty much nails this rusty Blade.
  17. Delivery Man is one joke stretched to the breaking point. Mine was reached.
  18. The title of this limp retread of "Minority Report" -- both films are based on stories by Philip K. Dick -- presumably refers to the reason the big names involved did this movie.
  19. Max
    "You're an awfully hard man to like, Hitler." Few serious films could survive a line like that. Max certainly doesn't.
  20. Grating.
  21. It galls me that Hollywood thinks we're shallow enough to swallow this swill. Or am I just being paranoid?
  22. The real plague is the movie, a sci-fi hodgepodge of bad history and worse special effects.
  23. This kind of pandering FX padding, unnurtured by humor or heart, is what shifts Jupiter Ascending from a shambles to a fiasco. In an effort to win back audiences by lowering their standards and their daring, the Wachowskis wind up where you never expected to find them creatively: on the ropes.
  24. Director Luke Greenfield, the auteur behind "The Animal," starring Rob Schneider, wants to pass off this limp-dick farce as social satire. Ha!
  25. This lame-ass chick-flick sampling of "Crazy Heart" is more like country Kryptonite.
  26. Estevez means well. But having your heart in the right place is no excuse for insipid ineptitude.
  27. At one point, Black puts out a fire by pissing on it. It's my job as a critic to piss on this dumb excuse for a movie. Consider it done.
  28. This spark-free film has no place to go on their resumes except under the heading of "Cringing Embarrassment."
  29. Hal claims that a Lantern's only enemy is fear itself. The thought of a sequel to this shamelessly soulless Hollywood product scares me plenty.
  30. The shortage of wit and the excess of goo can be summed up in Sandler's line to these children of divorce: "I'm like the stink on your feet — I'll always be there."
  31. The movie ultimately reveals itself as a pretender with no balls. Creatively, it's all wet.
  32. The movie plays like an evangelical prayer meeting, though I'd hold the hallelujahs. The characters we came to admire as vulnerable misfits hit the stage like visiting royalty and with a nonstop perkiness that makes the Von Trapps look like manic-depressives.
  33. Some bad movies should carry a leper's bell to warn off ticket buyers. Such a contagion is Charlie St. Cloud, a load of mawkish swill starring Zac Efron (bereft of the talent he showed in "Me and Orson Welles").
  34. Roth takes three powerhouse actors -- Julianne Moore as the mother, Samuel L. Jackson as the cop who interrogates her and Edie Falco as another woman who lost her son -- and reduces their talents to rubble and their characters to screeching cliches.
  35. The cheap thrills wear off way fast, and we're left with atrocious acting, feeble writing and clueless directing (from first-timer Steven Quale). The horror! The horror!
  36. Even Cate Blanchett can't save this misbegotten horse opera.
  37. Preacher Reitman won't be satisfied till we stomp our smartphones. LOL. WTF.
  38. A triumph for the machines, more proof that we do indeed live in the Matrix.
  39. Valentine's Day is a date movie from hell.
  40. Talk about your quick-buck exploitation.
  41. Oh, how good actors can trap themselves in drivel.
  42. Nothing the skunk does can begin to match the stench of this movie.
  43. Even wild man Gary Oldman, as a priest ready to eighty-six the wolfman with silver nail polish, can't liven up this humorless hogwash. And it's just sad to see the legendary Julie Christie stuck playing the grandmother.
  44. We also learn that five of his books, written in secret, will be published between 2015 and 2020. Can't wait to read them. Can't wait to forget this movie.
  45. The movie that might have been goes down in flames.
  46. An irredeemably dull tale.
  47. Call it "Apocalypto" for pussies -- a PG-13 rating, puh-leese! -- or prehistory for peabrains. Just don’t call it friendo. 10,000 B.C. will take your money, rob your time and hit your brain like a shot of Novacaine.
  48. Not to be catty about it, but the stench of the litter pan is all over this big-screen $90 million disaster-in-waiting.
  49. This crap is supposed to be the chick flick antidote to Super Bowl fever. Ha!
  50. Director Burr Steers, of the terrific "Igby Goes Down," is stuck polishing clichès.
  51. It's a lame trailer, but the movie itself is much, much worse.
  52. It's probably the movie event of the summer if you're an eight-year-old girl who doesn't get out much.
  53. A romantic comedy so numbing it feels like Novocaine.
  54. There's a difference between exposing misogyny and crassly exploiting it.
  55. It's a little early for self-parody in the career of Vin Diesel. But he's a calamitous cliché in A Man Apart.
  56. Here's Madge one more time doing something for which she is eminently unsuited – directing.
  57. If you can buy the pillow-lipped Angelina Jolie as a psychic FBI agent in Montreal to hunt a serial killer, then you can swallow the other implausibilities in this retread thriller.
  58. You know a sequel isn't working when, ten minutes into the movie, a voice inside your head starts screaming, "Please make it stop!"
  59. Cage and Baruchel work hard to stay accessible, but the computer-generated effects come on like heavy artillery blowing away any hint of flesh and blood. The Sorcerer's Apprentice should be rated U for Untouched by Human Hands.
  60. Sorry, no XOXO for this slick, hollow hooey.
  61. All I can cull is: don't mess with Mother Nature and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Fortune-cookie stuff. Erase All.
  62. I can't detect the hand of Hill in even a single scene in Bullet in the Head. It plays like a Stallone vanity project, impure and stupefyingly simple.
  63. Gordon, who died shortly after the first Arthur, never had to see the luckless 1988 sequel that made his beloved characters seem like strangers. The new Arthur, insipid when it should be infectious, leaves the same deadly impression.
  64. The cast got to spend a month shooting on Bora Bora. So that explains why they're in the movie. Why you'd spend good money for a ticket to watch them have all the fun and not have any fun yourself passes understanding.
  65. If you ever admired Julia Stiles, Selma Blair and Jason Lee -- and who didn't? -- don't watch them crush their careers in this laugh-free romantic comedy.
  66. Here they're just putting "Pirates of the Caribbean" in a saddle and pretending we won't notice.
  67. If you stay and watch the endless end credits, there's a short scene that hints a sequel is coming. That's what I call real pain.
  68. Nothing works. Nothing.
  69. The jokes? "Chicks are for fags," says Lloyd. The film is subtitled When Harry Met Lloyd. Believe me, you don't want to be there.
  70. Murphy, teaming again with his "Norbit" director Brian Robbins, is assuming we'll all line up for lazyass toilet jokes and pay for the privilege. Prove him wrong, people, please.
  71. Can no one save the talented Sandler from himself? I hate this movie. Click. I hate this movie. Click. I hate this movie. Click.
  72. I'd watch the vibrant Rachel McAdams and Eric Bana in anything, but The Time Traveler's Wife is pushing it.
  73. It's too bad Martin already made “What's the Worst That Could Happen?” The title really fits this one.
  74. It's Carell who projects the movie's only sense of mischief. But it's too little and too late.
  75. This feeble followup to 2010's godawful "Clash of the Titans" sucketh the mighty big one.
  76. Take a tired formula...Stir with a director, Florent Siri, who has no shame about stealing every sadistic suspense trick from the Die Hard series. Serve to a gullible audience willing to pay top dollar for secondhand goods.
  77. Stupefyingly stupid thriller.
  78. What a bold notion for a movie, and what a bust in terms of execution.
  79. Could 1960s-style sex, drugs and rock & roll really have been this dull?
  80. The new Mummy is, how can I put it? Just freakin' awful.
  81. An appallingly clumsy and stupid take on drugs, kidnapping and suicide in suburbia.
  82. The F&F franchise ran out of gas half way into the 2001 original.
  83. Bad things can happen to talented people. Take Tom McCarthy, who wrote and directed "The Station Agent," "The Visitor" and "Win Win." All gems. His fourth film, The Cobbler, is a failure on every level.
  84. It's getting harder to sustain a rooting interest in the career of Johnny Knoxville.
  85. Talk about disappointing. Director Doug Liman exuded style and cool in "Swingers," "Go" and "The Bourne Identity." He lost his way in the star bloat of "Mr. and Mrs. Smith," and now his mojo is buried in this amped-up sci-fi chase flick.
  86. Purists, be warned: This scare-flick quickie has as much relation to the 1953 Vincent Price classic with the same title as Paris Hilton does to acting.
  87. It's a no-go. View From the Top boasts a first-class cast, but they're all traveling coach.
  88. I like Longoria Parker on "Desperate Housewives" and truly believe she could have a career on the big screen if she promises to never again work with writer-director Jeff Lowell, who perpetrated this offense of a ghost comedy on her and on her otherwise gifted co-stars Paul Rudd and Lake Bell.
  89. What the filmmakers fail to recognize is that history on the page is quite different from what it needs to be onscreen, namely alive and visceral.
  90. Whitney Houston deserved better than to go out onscreen with this botch job remake of a 1976 soap opera that never deserved another thought.
  91. What Murphy's doing isn't acting; it's masturbation.
  92. What's left is a lot of strenuous playacting when what's called for is the finesse of the Japanese original. Skip this stub-toed substitute.
  93. Breathlessly boring.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 25 Critic Score
    You don't want to see this bilge. Director Milcho Manchevski, who was fired in midproduction, is the only one with cause to celebrate.
  94. The brooding RPatz doesn’t bite. But his movie does.
  95. I don't know what to make of Act of Valor. It's like reviewing a recruiting poster.
  96. The shopworn script by Pablo F. Fenjves, who ghost-wrote the unpublished O.J. Simpson book, If I Did It: The Confessions of the Killer, gets no help from director Asger Leth (Ghosts of Cite Soleil).
  97. Is it the worst of the seven screen Sparks so far? Nope. My vote still goes to 2009's "The Last Song" with Miley Cyrus mothering those unhatched turtle eggs. But it's still pretty damn insufferable.
  98. CQ
    Writer-director Roman Coppola is trying to capture a time he's too young to remember, when the French New Wave reinvigorated film art.
  99. Overheated, underdone farce. Race for the exit.

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