San Francisco Chronicle's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
For 5,702 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 53% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 45% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 0 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 62
Highest review score: 100 Mafioso
Lowest review score: 0 Pitch Black
Score distribution:
5,702 movie reviews
  1. Exactly what the title implies: mindless.
  2. Sommers film just lies there, weighted down by a complete lack of wit, artfulness and internal logic. So it's a disaster -- a big, loud, boring wreck.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 0 Critic Score
    Stay far, far away.
  3. Take a wretched premise. Imagine the worst picture that could be made from it. Then imagine something even worse. That's Alien vs. Predator.
  4. A movie so filled with contemptible, ugly and unfunny characters that it is physically difficult to watch.
  5. The most disingenuous film of the year. A sham. Pathetic. Embarrassing. The people behind this movie, which was made in Afghanistan, should be ashamed of themselves.
  6. Unoriginal, frequently incomprehensible and cheaply made.
  7. Worse than dull. It's parasitic.
  8. Four screenwriters are credited with this sloppy piece of work. Divide the embarrassment into quarters.
  9. So mind-blowingly horrible that it teeters on the edge of cinematic immortality.
  10. The most shocking thing about Harry and Max isn't the subject matter. The most shocking thing is just how tepid it is.
  11. Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez had their fun with From Dusk Till Dawn, and now they need to stay away from each other. For their own good. Forever.
  12. How bad does it get? How far past the basement can one elevator go?
  13. Desperately wants to deal dramatically with the legitimate issues of homosexuality, tolerance, homelessness and drug use. But to do so, the movie, like Ethan, would first need to grow up.
  14. In trouble from its first minutes.
  15. In stiff competition for the lamest thing ever put on celluloid.
  16. You'll feel so much better just sending your $9.50 to the Red Cross then catching "I Know What You Did Last Summer" one more time on television.
  17. Annoyingly simplistic.
  18. This may be hard to believe, but there's not a single moment of drama or tension in any of the action sequences. And the film is made up almost entirely of action.
  19. A graceless, embarrassing effort.
  20. The best bits come in the first few minutes -- or maybe the jokes just seem fresher then.
  21. This so-called comedy is so not funny, it makes "Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo" look like Chaplin.
  22. Silent Hill has plenty of bad acting, bad dialogue and a confusing plot -- all of which become exponentially more painful when the movie goes on forever.
  23. The result is embarrassing: quick cuts and shaky, hand- held camera work, bad acting and lots of attitude.
  24. Immediately shoots to the top of the list of the year's worst movies.
  25. Belongs in the holiday hall of shame.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 0 Critic Score
    Remember that manic, rambling Oscar acceptance speech, when Benigni leapt around the auditorium? That might have been charming for two or three minutes, but imagine two hours of it.
  26. Only a complete idiot could think Epic Movie is remotely funny.
  27. Hogwash and not even funny hogwash.
  28. With Lake at the center, something that could have been innocuous becomes painful, and a sure shot at mediocrity is transformed into one of the worst films of the year.

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