The art, the audio, the level design, it’s all just sorta “there”, and feels creatively bankrupt.

So what did it need besides a miracle? Depth. Lots of depth.

It's not a bad game, it's just one of the most tediously easy, generic and downright bland games of the year.

Infinite Undiscovery is never particularly awful or broken. The music is excellent, and overall the presentation is pretty solid. It’s just that this is one of those games that seem to drag on even though it’s a relatively short game.

Suspending your disbelief in a theatre is one thing, but engaging in a socially inept character’s seemingly redundant flights of fancy via overtly over-exaggerated mini games is all kinds of messy.

The story is a compelling piece that will drag most bookworms through the many gameplay obstacles, if only to find out what happens at the end, and truth be told it really is worth the wait. Problem is, you could just go and buy the novel and save having the experience marred by a disappointing effort of a game.

There are a couple of decent ideas here, but the game as a whole needs some serious refinement in just about every way to have any hope of standing out in what is a fairly crowded genre.

The “multiplayer only” tag is sure to put many off from considering the purchase at the current time.

So if you really want to support Code Lyoko, go buy some of the DVDs or watch a marathon. Regardless of what you choose, it’ll be time better spent than with this game.

Using the wind and terrain to your advantage, firing the cannons at the perfect time to launch the perfect assault; it could have been amazing. Disappointingly, with poor A.I, little replay value and poor use of the systems trademark features it’s turns out to be as entertaining as scurvy.

Despite its solid foundations, Velvet Assassin doesn’t have the brute strength to be anything more than a brief distraction for extremely patient, hardcore fans of the traditional stealth genre.

For a game where the sole mechanic is to draw lines, it’s ironic that not long after starting, you’ll feel like the ink is already starting to run dry.

If the end of the world is anything like that depicted by Stormrise, we can expect our siblings to lose their sense of direction and choose extraordinarily complex systems to order themselves around with. Lord have mercy on our souls.

Another disappointing effort.

The blue stuff could be an analogy for the game at large – unexpected, cool to look at, but utterly, maddeningly infuriating and with little resemblance to what the forces that birthed it set out to achieve.

As it stands, the “athletes” in Pirates vs. Ninjas Dodgeball look like people lost in a vast sea.

If you’re determined to see the purchase of the Voralberg toy factory finalized, you’d be better off accompanying Kate Walker on the unabridged PC version.

From Software’s goals with Ninja Blade appear to have been slim to negligible, and with a considerable portion of fans of the infinitely preferable Ninja Gaiden ready to buy up anything with a similar remit, they’re unlikely to be nearly as disappointed as I am.

A disappointing outing from Mr Esc and his associates, as we’ll be expecting something very different for the next installment.

The whole notion of a scored review seems a little arbitrary in the face of the niche and dedicated fanbase this game will attract, and its attempts at populist window-dressing are virtually pointless because for the rest of us, the whole entity is at its most lenient completely mystifying, and at its most uncompromising utterly impenetrable.

Honestly, Last Remnant is just another JRPG with a fresh coat of paint and a few unfinished ideas.

Shamefully, Fists of Plastic won’t have you reliving your childhood memories for long, as the tiresome challenges and lack of online execution will have you beating yourself up quicker than you can fling your joypad across the room with dragon-punch shaped irritation.

If you’ve already completed the main game then Ultor Exposed is nothing more than a diversion, and a relatively expensive one at that.

The difficulty level is almost non-existent, AI is laughable, and there’s little creativity involved with the development of Layle’s powers or the places he explores. Not to mention the headache-inducing backtracking you’ll have to endure. It’s sad, considering how gorgeous some of parts of this game are.

Digested in short bursts there is some stupid amusement to be gleaned, but with the myriad of shortcomings found in the title there are certainly much better ways to get your senseless violence on.

The new story is generic, the exploration hampered by unnecessary backtracking and the dreaded locked door puzzles.

The only thing Death By Cube has to offer that its competition doesn't is an excessive level of blood (or red robot oil), but that alone doesn't warrant a purchase.

The problem is that the motion sensing is abysmal; the game will frequently misread your commands, resulting in your character shuffling through the stances until he either miraculously makes it through or smashes his head into a bloody pulp.

Even if the game were technically sound, Puzzle Quest 2 has since been released, so going with the lesser option of Puzzle Chronicles would be a poor investment on just about every level.

It brings more than its fair share of content to the table but fails to ever truly distinguish itself as more than an average mini golf title.

If this was the final project of a programming student who waited to the last minute to complete, then we can at least chalk up all the errors and poorly written storyline as factors needing improvement. Sadly this is not the case.

Despite its intriguing but flawed multiplayer suite, Kane & Lynch 2: Dog Days is one of the most underwhelming shooters of recent memory.

With poor combat and clumsy controls, repetitive gameplay, and many frustrating design issues, Hyrophobia is not the wet dream we all wanted, just a conceptual one.

Rather than begging the question of whether or not the Dreamcast title is still relevant, this port clearly indicates that it isn't.

Unbound Saga is a beautiful, poorly executed snoozer that can't hold the player's attention for too long.

Something like Fist of the North Star deserved something better than just a blatant copy/paste job. Ultimately, all the buckets of blood in the world fail to hide this is the same thing players have grown disenchanted with a generation ago.

Lost Planet 2 may satisfy fans of shooters and Japanese arcade games looking for a hybrid - at its best, it's a mix of Gears of War and pattern-based action games - but it will probably frustrate them, and it will definitely offend everyone else.

In a year beholden to console gaming's finest offerings, this is impossible to recommend.

Rhythm Zone was released as an inconsistent product that didn't do what it advertised.

It shouldn't be a gamble for online multiplayer to work though. In the end, Quake Arena Arcade rings its own death knell and doesn't give Quake III Arena the justice it deserves.

To top it off, an experienced player can get through the game in five hours, and there isn't much in terms of replay value. Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II is a poorly executed, thoughtless game that is best to be avoided.

All in all, The Undergarden is definitely a game that is to be avoided by puzzle enthusiasts, ultra violent droogies, or people who like to be given a clear purpose before giving anything their attention.

Unless DynamoKid has some drastic updates down the line, there isn't any compelling reason to download it.

At least know this: I didn't enjoy my crime spree nearly as much as I should have.

It's far too long and tedious, allowing us to save along the way, when its old school appeal would have been better served by fewer levels, no saves and less repetition.

The GBA can't make a game that looks anything like the sensational film, and clearly using a Double Dragon engine from the 8-bit era, and giving us lots and lots of uninspired action against swarms of clones in recycled backgrounds isn't the solution to the hardware's glass ceiling. This effort isn't worthy of the license.

I like my FPS shooters to deliver a single-player experience too, and Painkiller: Hell Wars flatly fails in that regard. If you're looking for online deathmatch, Painkiller: Hell Wars is a reasonable purchase, but don't expect anything from the single-player experience, particularly, enjoyment.

There's no attempt here to take a risk and try something new, which may have turned the whole series around...If they couldn't be bothered to make the effort and create a decent game from the plastic soldier concept, why should we be bothered to play it?

The graphics and sound might be a great leap forward, but the rest of the game fails to meet any of the current criteria for a good first-person shooter.

From its stripping down of the series' most successful gameplay elements to its obviously desperate addition of weapons and 'street' cool this is still a product of a development studio with a good imagination. But also, it seems, a lazy one only too happy to jump on the same GTA bandwagon that's currently carrying way too many developers.

As far as driving games go, this is a must-skip.

But in all honesty, this is a game I'd be embarrassed to own, and I own "WCW Nitro."

This game has no story, almost non-existent controls, pathetic graphics, and audio quality that will make you twitch in discomfort.

From its stripping down of the series' most successful gameplay elements to its obviously desperate addition of weapons and 'street' cool this is still a product of a development studio with a good imagination. But also, it seems, a lazy one only too happy to jump on the same GTA bandwagon that's currently carrying way too many developers.

We could have literally had Tom and Jerry, Aardman style. Instead we have rather un-imaginative game whose novelty runs off the older you are, and that's disappointing.

Generally, Rango is a much more disappointing game than it is actually bad. It's perfectly functional, and maybe even rarely enjoyable, but it fails to truly capitalize on the license and does little to differentiate itself from pretty much any other 3D platformer that's come before it.

The imprecision of The Fancy Pants Adventure's platforming segments leave a lingering feeling that it's still trying to appeal to an audience that's OK with a quirky-yet-limited platforming game.

At best Sonic Adventure is an amusing history lesson for the tolerant, at worst it just serves as a reminder of how long Sonic has been floundering.

A poor game shrouded in an illusion of mediocrity.

It's a pity that a video game which attempts to revel in back to basics no nonsense escapism - through a hail of bullets and bodies - somehow ends up being more forgettable than the Black Ops campaign. And that's saying something.

The gameplay can be addicting, but similar to its overly violent theme, it's a gimmick that washes quicker than blood.

There's some initial promise here, but it's ultimately a regressive, if not a lateral move from the last game, hampered mostly by its own lack of ambition, scope, and an overly demanding release schedule.

In its present state though, I cannot recommend Lord of the Rings: War in the North. If patching is successful, I can only recommend this to starved genre fans, but don't expect much.

Alice: Madness Return has a terrific visual style and intriguing ideas, which is why it's so frustrating to see what could've been a clever game turn into such a tedious, drawn-out mess.

Scarygirl is riddled with countless inherent flaws that make the game, in no simpler terms, bad.

Despite the flaws in the execution, it's more Choplifter. And for a select few, that still means something.

This is a sub-par licensed shooter without any real sense for what it wants to accomplish.

Clearly a lot of love and effort has gone into making this game and both Endeavor Bros. and Monkube should be applauded for creating one of the best-looking and most endearing games on the casual market, but the fundamental gameplay issues cannot be ignored.

It's highly energetic in attitude and then does all it can to hamper and slow the player's progress and enjoyment. All filler, no killer.

Whether you're fighting Gustav Graves, Blofeld, Oddjob or Sanchez, it's all done via these poorly disguised Quick Time Events. Every time a boss would step forward and assume the position, I cringed.

Its incredibly short stature makes ZOE an almost pointless re-release, and the de-evolved frame rate handling of 2nd Runner isn't much to pine for unless your PS2 copy was lost, stolen, or destroyed. If this is an effort to get people amped and ready for the recently announced Zone of the Enders 3, fans certainly deserve better than this.

F1 Race Stars provides small doses of enjoyment alongside larger doses of frustration and injustice, thanks to its stubborn insistence of remaining both an F1 and karting game.

For ancient king and Elvish lord, Guardians of Middle-earth is stuck in the Mystical Bog of Latency Irritation. Its system's solidly built and there's the appearance of depth crying to be uncovered. However, those cries aren't being heard. This isn't the first time a multiplayer-only XBLA title has effectively been broken online. It deserved a better fate than this.

Aside from the campaign mode, there is a lackluster sandbox involving the building of a criminal empire without objectives or opposition. Go online and you can take the terrible combat system and enjoy it with friends, or against them, if you wish. But you won’t feel like a gangster, but rather an accountant with a penchant for real estate.

Overall the game is a big disappointment - often frustrating, dated and has little in the way of reward or replay value.

With better pacing and a lot more balancing, Mars: War Logs could have been a fresh, satisfying take on BioWare’s proven formula. Its intriguing premise and characters eventually succumb to its broken systems, creating a fiction you’ll hope sooner to finish than completely understand.

Unfinished and rotten to the core.

The game is a real mess, with shoddy graphics, a badly constructed and executed plot, repetitive and flawed gameplay, bland multiplayer elements and a serious lack of atmosphere.

If only more time were spent developing a more stimulating AI, or adding a better selection of mini games, then things may have turned out differently. But for what Ping Pals offers, you can’t escape the feeling you’ve been cheated out of your money.

Here’s how Rengoku works: take something cool and mess it up. It’s that simple. They took robots and they made them boring and stupid.

Just Cause reeks of wasted potential. The story could have been interesting, but the generic characters and bland execution aren’t endearing in the slightest.

The great license and the professional players just can’t make for an entertaining title thanks to a weak graphics engine and poor AI.

The great license and the professional players just can’t make for an entertaining title thanks to a weak graphics engine and poor AI.

It’s just a really, really shallow game with not a whole lot going on with it.

We want interesting levels. We want a variety of enemies that challenge us. We want cool guns to kill them with. Instead, the developers did what they wanted. They put doors on ceilings and tables on walls and little switches to hit to pull you where they want you to go. They forgot everything that makes games fun.

All in all, the shoddy in-game physics, sense of weightlessness given to the cars, and jaded track designs should be enough to turn the average consumer away.

It’s horribly unexciting thanks to a total lack of speed and absolutely no challenge from your computer controlled “opponents.”

While its console counterpart had no problem loading up, the PSP version of All In suffers from some atrocious load times that cripple the experience (four minutes to get into a game!) which turns an average poker simulation into a game that you really shouldn’t even bother with.

Ghost Rider is the classic example of what happens when videogames meet a license. That's all I can say to wrap this one up.

An uninspired mess.

It's weird, very weird. Mini-game compendiums are usually a mixed bag of sweet and sour, but WTF contains more of the cringing variety.

It’s floundering helplessly in transition from PC to Xbox 360.

Family Guy tries to appeal to everyone by having three different genres in one short game and it fails miserably.

TMNT feels like a really, really early build of Prince of Persia: Sands of Time, stripped to its bare bones and given a movie license to shift copies.

Whether or not this is worth the 400 Microsoft points, is entirely up to how much fun you think you can squeeze out of a very limited game with next to no variety.

The machine gun fires with the same "oomph" that you'd expect if you were firing a pellet gun. There's no power to the shots.

It wouldn't even set the last generation of consoles alight.

A bad game. You might assume that a company as reputable as the History Channel might take more care to protect their license, but it's clear that they just wanted to make a quick buck.

No wonder it was so hard to get into this clubhouse, it appears the foundations are fatefully unstable.

When you play a game and find the most immersive sections are cut-scenes and the game isn’t called Metal Gear Solid, then you know something isn’t quite right.

Facebreaker shows some promise at the start; it’s plucky, full of spunk, and mildly charming. But play it more and it becomes apparent that it’s nothing but a one tricky pony. That charm and dazzle soon withers away along with your enthusiasm, and Facebreaker ends up punching itself in the face.

While it presents a few neat ideas, Paint By DS is disappointing on nearly every level. It's dull, boring, and what's more, absolutely heartless.

X-Blades is a whole load of bad ideas pushed together into one colossal mistake. It’s pretty and titillating, but just like a real prostitute, your money is better spent elsewhere.

Mister Slime is the dictionary definition of bland.

From the sleep-inducing gameplay to the wooden dialogue and stale story, the whole project feels phoned in Hunting ghosts has never been so bad.

When the included episode and a couple of the music tracks are the highlights of the game, there is something not right about the entire package.

Archaic button mashers such as Beijing 2008 just aren’t relevant anymore.

The most innovative feature is that different creatures may appear depending on what time you dive.

It seems set with doing the bare minimum (a lot of the time, not even that) and expects it to be acceptable just because it’s splashing around in a small pond starved of enough shooters to hold the flag without it.

A missed opportunity.

Fans of the ancient myths will want to give this blandly rewritten adventure a wide berth as will RPG fans and people waiting patiently for the next God of War. There’s no challenge here, no excitement and ultimately no game worth playing. What a wasted opportunity.

A brief distraction from a never-ending chain of blockbuster epics.

To say that Mahjong Tales: Ancient Wisdom is overpriced at $10 would be a bit of an understatement. To be honest I had a hard enough time dragging myself to play the game for free.

There’s a mixed bag of ideas present in Wanted: Weapons of Fate, but as a whole it feels terribly rushed.

Honestly, there aren’t any pros of playing this over buying a few Japanese comics or light novels instead if this is the sort of thing you’re looking for, and at least you can go at your own pace versus not being able to wade through the mostly trite dialogue.

Star Wars The Clone Wars: Republic Heroes feels like a cheap cash-in to milk the Star Wars franchise around Christmas time.

It may have been fun back in the 1990s but now there’s just not enough depth to gain any sort of prolonged enjoyment out of it. Short bursts in multiplayer can be mildly enjoyable, but for 800 points it’s simply not worth it. It’s crazy to think they were originally going to charge 1200 for what is a bare-bone remake.

From an intriguing prospect to an abysmal game, Fairytale Fights has turned out more like a horror story.

Vancouver 2010 has its moments, but they’re exhausted within an hour’s play.

Better yet, let’s just leave the on-rails style in the ’90s where it belongs. It’s been a nice ride, but we need to start moving on.

Though you'll often be angry at it, Naughty Bear finds a way to make you smile at least once each level, even if you are reloading it for the third or fourth time. It's an example for every game design classroom of what not to do, but almost in spite of the developers, somehow, there's an entertaining game here that you'll inexplicably come back to.

If the wonky controls were worked out, the game would be substantially improved right there.

It lacks just about everything that a quality game needs in this day and age. While the absence of a story may not impact your experience, the shoddy controls and bland attack system will leave you craving for something more.

One big, kaiju-sized lump of crap. The monster selection is crap, the gameplay is crap, the audio is crap, but the graphical presentation is fairly good. So, does that sound like a game you would enjoy?

The original Bomberman just wasn't a very good game back in 1987, and bringing it back unaltered as a “classic” doesn't change that simple fact.

This could have actually been an interesting game, but unfortunately it's uninspired and boring licensed drivel that few people are going to enjoy.

The idea of changing your foes into blocks and using them to solve puzzles is an interesting, if not unoriginal idea. The painfully simple puzzles, hindered platforming aspects, cruddy combat mechanics, pathetic presentation, and a truly loathsome saving system all combine to make this one of the last great disappointments on the GBA.

The great license and the professional players just can't make for an entertaining title thanks to a weak graphics engine and poor AI.

The great license and the professional players just can't make for an entertaining title thanks to a weak graphics engine and poor AI.

A by-the-numbers shooter that fails to take advantage of its license.

Somewhere along the way, the vision for this game was lost and what remains is a jumbled, unsatisfying mess. There are good ideas here - the controls work very well and the core ideas the game calls on have potential. It's just very poorly conceived.

What's most disappointing about The Cartel is that it feels like a point of no return for what was once a promising franchise. It has really dropped the ball on the whole Western motif in favor of mostly grim urban environments and an almost actively disengaging plot.

It's nowhere being as wealthy as Dead Money, it's more dishonest than Honest Hearts, and compared to Big MT, it's the real Big Empty.

Much like a classic hamburger, the original BurgerTime's all right for what it is and there's little necessity for improvement. It can still be improved upon, but not without first undermining its simplicity and turning it into something else.

Zack Zero is strictly amateur hour. Everything from its awful production values to the way it bungles simple platforming is an indicator that the developers lack direction. Even if the player manages to look past the dearth of new concepts and the poor execution, the crashes and profoundly obnoxious pop-up messages will ensure they've given up on Zack Zero long before the credits role.

Even to the most hardcore of point-and-click fanatics, I cannot wholeheartedly recommend Da New Guys, and if we were still in the '90s this would remain so.

While on paper that might sound like a good idea, in practice not so much. Cars are sluggish and painful to manage while the core gameplay feels unbalanced and oversimplified.

Deep Black: Reloaded features incredibly repetitive gameplay and broken, frustrating shooting. It's devoid of the smoothness in controls and exciting action that made the Gears of War series such a joy to play.

This is a broken, dismal game that manages only to disappoint across its meager four hours. Fans looking for a longer experience can ramp up the difficulty level, but this just means you'll be bored AND frustrated. If you want an authentic Battleship experience, go buy the board game and avoid this dreck.

It's a shame that our final goodbyes to the cityscape of Omega is so passionless and dull. If Bioware intends to release more episodic content for ME3, I hope they don't rely on their increasingly tired combat system to do all of the work next time round. Let's have some more of that character back, okay?

With no story or true narrative to latch onto, there's no reason for players to care about what's going on. And there's only one thing ever going on in Dear Esther: nothing. Broken up into individual pieces-the graphics, writing, and music clearly show talent and might have led to interesting stories or games-but together they form a dull, lifeless experience that's quickly forgotten.

The camera does not work well enough to capture everyone on screen at any one time. Much of the game was spent battling with the camera, in open spaces, spinning it around to find where the other unseen opponents were. It gets worse within enclosed spaces, when there’s little room to maneuver.

Without the tactile use of a proper analogue stick, or a significantly more forgiving sense of level design, Cling! is a game only suitable for the most dedicated masochists. And, before playing this, I might have included myself in that distinguished fraternity.

Developed by Arush Entertainment, this urban-themed FPS game makes a few stabs at greatness but ultimately misses its mark by, oh, about a mile.

Every texture repeats over and over again until your eyes cry out for something different. Even the artificially produced skies are bland and generic, possibly so the clouds don’t upstage the boring enemies you fight again.

It’s just an awful game, pure and simple. The action is broken due to the graphical problems, and the lack of variations causes my brain to hurt. Instead of buying this garbage, give the original film a purchase.

What annoys me most about Gorky Zero is that although it's crap, it's not amusingly so. Some games are so dire that you find yourself laughing before you shred their shiny disks, but this is so generic and uninspiring that it's frustrating.

The game is short, damn short. It can be finished in about an hour or so, and once you have sussed out the way the simple 'strategy' part works, all further enjoyment can only be derived from the main missions, which I'm sure you'll realise by now, can't save this Superman.

The characters have no personality whatsoever. The missions are a joke; the ridiculously horrible AI makes beating every objective a five-minute walk in the park at best.

Whilst gamers are happy to purchase badly developed, poorly contrived games such as this, sadly those examples will still be a rarity.

Touch Detective is terrible in all the ways that make an adventure-puzzler (like the aforementioned Phoenix Wright, or Monkey Island, or Grim Fandango, or etc.) worth its salt. Go spend your £20 on Cluedo, because at least then you're controlling the pathfinding.

It’s a given that the Xbox 360 sequel has slightly better graphics, but they don’t justify the aforementioned gameplay or the subsidiary poolside mini-games. Xtreme 2 represents a large step in the wrong direction for one of gaming’s finest development teams.

MLB 2K7 is not worth your time and this is definitely one game to avoid.

The gameplay is broken in countless ways and the A.I. is comical at best. It's an ugly, unoriginal, inadequately tested and terribly implemented mess that has no place in anyone's game collection.

An utterly abysmal game.

I suppose things could've been worse: they could've done a poorly emulated version of the Intellivision hit "Maze-A-Tron."

There is nothing here for anyone - not even the most ardent of Godzilla fans. It’s like if someone took your favourite ever franchise, made a half-arsed game out of it then spat in your face asking for money.

Yaris might be free, but not even that can justify the space required to download the game. After all, what's your time worth?

If you can cope with laggy, wooden movement, touch-detection that goes from iffy during navigation to horrible in the minigames, a story which doesn’t (even try to) make much sense, minimal music, and conversations bordering on wall-talk, you might find some comfort in this old-school adventure game that sticks to its prehistoric roots. Otherwise, this isn’t worth the time – even though it is a pretty damn short ride.

While I make it a goal to play every game I review to completion, there’s just no way that I am going to waste more my life playing this game.

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince is a throwback to the bad old days of EA; a shameless and shameful cash-in that barely qualifies as a full game.

There is no way anyone can justify buying this when Tomb Raider: Anniversary can be bought for a third of the price.

It amazes me how Koei can get away with releasing the same game every year, without even attempting to fix the problems that have plagued all their past entries. There’s nothing worth investing in here.

With £17.99, you could buy a bucket of paint, throw it all over your bedroom walls and watch it dry. For a game packed with so many so-called “celebrities”, Celebrity Sports Showdown is a big non-event.

With an unnecessarily simplistic control system, terrible commentary and a lifeless customisation system, the only slight nugget of entertainment can be found in the licensed career mode.

Avoid like you would a vicious infection.

Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: Echoes of Time on Wii is a complete mess. It’s simply unpleasant to play, which is a real shame, because content-wise it’s not half bad.

Valhalla Knights only excels at one thing: no other game can grate on your nerves quite like this.

In the end, it’s a game of such dubious quality I find it difficult to recommend even to fans of the films, and instead recommend it swiftly being hidden beneath better dross in a bargain bin, or, better yet, a normal, everyday, trash bin.

It may be dubbed the ultimate collection but even on consoles the BFG Edition is far from ideal. As a PC game its existence is highly questionable; any esoteric changes made on id's part have already been done better by a dedicated modding community.

This loose fragment of fan-service is priced as a Vita game and designed as a low-end iOS game. Square’s use of IAPs wouldn’t be a good model even if it were free-to-play. With the premium attached, All the Bravest is simply anti-consumer. It’s a big waste of a good opportunity to streamline.

It’s tempting to support a game that’s been through struggles and survived out the other side, especially when it carries a popular name, but Aliens: Colonial Marines should have remained vaporware.

This is the very definition of a shameless cash-cow. Anyone of sound mind must steer clear.

If you hate someone, and I mean HATE someone, give them this game as a gift, in the hopes that they’ll play it, because that way you can say to them, “haha, you’re an idiot who plays Big Rigs!” I wish I could think of some redeeming factors for the game, but there simply aren’t any.

Truly a generic licensed game gone wrong.

But by slapping a horde of white meat fodder onto a tacky shooting system and calling it a day, the developers have severely undercooked this dinner and given me a bad case of Campylobacter.

You lose if you buy Deal or No Deal, no matter how many times the game may say otherwise.

Finding any redeeming qualities in CSI: Hard Evidence is like searching for clues in a crime scene drenched in bleach.

Ninjabread Man couldn’t be a more of a generic platformer if it tried.

There are simply no redeeming features to justify recommending Griffin's Story, even for people who are inexplicably fans of the movie.

In short, BOB has no redeeming qualities at all and I would not wish this on my worst enemy.

Having to play George of the Jungle was without a doubt the lowest, most embarrassing moment of my gaming track record.

A complete failure of a game.

Beyond some sharp points in the visual style, The Asskickers is a prime example of why beat 'em ups have all but been abandoned. Go play Streets of Rage if you need a reminder of how relevant that still feels – this game won't satiate anyone's thirst for 16-bit nostalgia.

If you love, or are curious about, Ugly Americans just watch the show. If you need a good sidescrolling shooter fix, an 8-bit snack should suffice to satisfy your palette.

Everything about Amy is designed to frustrate and drain the player's will before they eventually throw up their hands in defeat and give up. Between the broken combat, constant annoyances in dealing with Amy, counter-intuitive controls, non-existent plot, bland characters, cheap deaths, and overall shoddy workmanship, Amy fails on practically every level.