Michael Nordine

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For 180 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 43% higher than the average critic
  • 8% same as the average critic
  • 49% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 5.5 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Michael Nordine's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 57
Highest review score: 100 Aquarius
Lowest review score: 10 108 Stitches
Score distribution:
  1. Positive: 73 out of 180
  2. Negative: 24 out of 180
180 movie reviews
    • 36 Metascore
    • 40 Michael Nordine
    Green Dragons wants to be spaghetti with marinara, but it's closer to egg noodles and ketchup.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 40 Michael Nordine
    Far better as a family drama than as a gangster picture, the film's muddled attempt at marrying the two distracts from its emotional center.
    • 34 Metascore
    • 40 Michael Nordine
    Too by-the-numbers for the emotional impact to resonate as long as it could and should have.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 40 Michael Nordine
    It's easy to get lost in the natural beauty of Vermont, and Mosher (who worked on the film with several students as part of a Marlboro College program) clearly takes joy in doing so. The liveliest counterpart to that striking landscape isn't Dern, but rather Jessica Hecht as his wayward daughter, who hits all the grace notes the rest of the film tends to miss.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 40 Michael Nordine
    The filmmaker isn't as nimble as he is ambitious, though, and you'll feel all 148 minutes of Brimstone's runtime — just maybe not in the way Koolhoven wants you to.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 40 Michael Nordine
    31
    Rob Zombie can do better than 31. For proof, just watch any other Rob Zombie movie.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 38 Michael Nordine
    That all the good things--and there are several--Red Lights has going for it are ultimately in service of an ending that might even make M. Night Shyamalan cringe represents one of the year's biggest missed opportunities.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 38 Michael Nordine
    It's the kind of movie you'd find in someone's VHS collection, decide to watch based on the box art and title, and end up switching out for "The House of the Devil" instead.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    An extended riff on marital infidelity, this is the rare omnibus film that isn't just a mixed bag -- it very nearly succeeds at being uniformly bad.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    The plot is that most dreadful of mixes: both laughably silly and needlessly complicated.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    No one in the movie rises above the level of a stock character, so over-the-top in their familiar jokes as to barely even register as satire.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Those who favor gore above all else will be at home amid the blood and guts, but others should heed the obvious warning invited by the title: don't watch it.
    • 18 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    By far the highest concentration of actual humor comes during the blooper reel over the end credits; free of the script’s saccharine constraints, the performers immediately demonstrate their chops.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Two second-act revelations alter its tired dynamic for the better, but those changes are undone by cheap scares and a climactic revelation that's more ho-hum than horrifying.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Returning director Tim Story lays out the narrative wares with all the subtlety of a neon sign on the Strip, not that the screenplay from Keith Merryman and David A. Newman (who also co-wrote the first one) gives him much to work with.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    The gradual revelation that there's more to Daisy than meets the eye is no great surprise, but it does at least negate — too late! — some of the more troubling subtext.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Worse than the latent silliness of such a premise is how little the filmmakers ultimately do with the world of narrative possibilities it presents; in attempting to show the universality of love, The Beauty Inside succeeds in showing the opposite.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Roth amplifies that exploitation flick's least interesting components (gore, cruelty) at the expense of all others.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Co-writer/director Jonathan English ups the viscera and nudity at the expense of a compelling narrative, which was hardly the original’s strong suit (if indeed it had one) anyway.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    So far removed from any original signal — there are several direct references to Titanic, so it's timely, too — this nuance-free affair registers as little more than noise.
    • 25 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    The main enticement is getting to see Cage go full bore. And he does, gesticulating wildly and assuming an unplaceable accent, but as the only combustible element in this otherwise lackadaisical film, his energy ends up bouncing around with nowhere to go.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Most of the film's major happenings are either illogical or, much more damningly, not especially thrilling.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Mild schadenfreude aside, however, the film inspires almost no feeling at all — even the Friday the 13th movies bother giving the bad guy a backstory.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    The film is content to merely document certain happenings and hope you find them as interesting as it does.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    Stachura turns everything up to 11 almost from the outset, and all escalation from there feels overwrought.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Michael Nordine
    The film likens prostitution to a continuation of the slavery that was eradicated two decades earlier by a certain Proclamation, but never bothers letting any of the working girls emancipate themselves.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 25 Michael Nordine
    It would almost be impressive how many funny people it took to make something so unfunny — the full ensemble includes Nick Kroll, Allison Tolman, Michaela Watkins and Rob Huebel — only it’s difficult to be impressed when you’re focused on how little you’re laughing.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 25 Michael Nordine
    A Dark Truth is one of those unfortunate projects whose component parts are immediately at odds with one another.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 20 Michael Nordine
    None of these TV-movie trappings does Freedom's topical subject any favors, but they do confirm that those most passionate about something often require some sort of creative filter when making art about it.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 10 Michael Nordine
    Its utterly predictable narrative and lazy sexism make for a toxic combination.

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