For 192 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 36% higher than the average critic
  • 10% same as the average critic
  • 54% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 11.2 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Simon Abrams' Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 49
Highest review score: 100 Cosmopolis
Lowest review score: 0 But Always
Score distribution:
  1. Positive: 66 out of 192
  2. Negative: 69 out of 192
192 movie reviews
    • 52 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    The Good Doctor isn't a ponderous bore because Blake isn't a strictly good or bad character: It sucks because he isn't even a compelling character.
    • 40 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Khumba is disastrously uninspired. Not even a galaxy of stars, united in their willingness to take a check, can save Khumba from being the boringest plucky outsider of all.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Blood Glacier is too sleepy to do anything with its guano-stirring premise. Yes, there are crazy-go-nutty monsters in the film, but you seldom get to see them as they sadly are not the focus of Blood Glacier.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    If nothing else, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reminds us that nostalgia is often used as a mandate for spectacularly lazy filmmaking.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    The film makes one damning if unoriginal observation—the "reality" presented on reality TV is manufactured—and then does nothing to expand on it.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    By widening the scope of their based-on-a-true story, the makers of Revenge of the Green Dragon make their subjects look like the products of unimaginative cultural assimilation.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Point and Shoot consequently feels like a film made by a storyteller — not a journalist — who doesn't know he can ask follow-up questions.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Green, who plays a snotty version of himself, doesn't follow through on any of the ideas that make his film stand out. As a result, Digging Up the Marrow just uselessly lies there, like a cat during a heat wave.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    A coming-of-age drama that's also Southern Gothic ghost story, is an unusual, ambitious failure, mostly because the film's hyper-naturalistic style is meant to evoke a supernatural mood.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Attacks doesn't establish the severity of a real-life tragedy, it only crassly devalues the loss of human life.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    When the creators of The Last Exorcism Part II swapped pseudo-verité realism for psychological realism, they made it a lot harder to take their franchise seriously.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Throughout the film, Mindless Behavior's four interchangeable members only project youthful enthusiasm and PR-friendly love for their fans.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    This sequel is sluggish and rote where its predecessor was aggressively perky and desperate to please...Tai Chi Hero is more Tai Chi Business as Usual.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Most jokes don't translate very well in Go Goa Gone, a Bollywood horror comedy influenced by Shaun of the Dead.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Ultimately, Devries seems to want to impress viewers with his anger.
    • 29 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Chander Pahar is an unfocused adventure-cum-travelogue.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Stage Fright's lopsided tone wouldn't be so confounding if the horror elements worked or if writer-director Jerome Sable's music, co-composed with Eli Batalion, weren't so forgettable.
    • 49 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Beyond isolated moments of dickish charm — and his climactic four-way fight involving a sword, a crucifix, and two steel pipes — Chapman just comes across like another pseudo-heroic American behaving badly abroad.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Most of the documents that Lapa quotes from are, as presented, unrevealing — even offensive.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    The film's rote right-makes-might fantasy wouldn't be so obnoxious if pandering to the lowest common denominator wasn't its default mode.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    The three lead actors are limited by their characters' kiddy-pool-shallow behavior.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Plays like a sampler of Dreamworks Animation's worst creative impulses: sugar-rush pacing, pandering meta-gags, and a slick, flavorless animation style.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Barker's tactlessness wouldn't be so bad if he weren't too high on his own patchwork rhetoric to ask his subjects what specifically motivates them.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Amateurishly realized sensationalism trumps character-driven drama throughout Killers.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    The Loft's boorish leads aren't sensible enough to be worth caring about, making the film's character-driven conclusion feel like a self-defeating cop-out.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Project Almanac could have been fun, but its creators don't seem to know what fun looks like.
    • 32 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Leading man Richard Dreyfuss is so irrepressibly charming that he almost saves Jason Priestley's dismal buddy comedy Cas & Dylan from its awkward humor and trite sentimentality.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Absolution is an unconvincing showcase for Byron Mann, a new action star to whom Steven Seagal halfheartedly tries to pass a torch.
    • 24 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Though it starts off as a cautiously optimistic conversion narrative, the pseudo-progressive, banned-in-India LGBT drama Unfreedom quickly devolves into an absurdly pessimistic provocation.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Tepid ghost story Insidious: Chapter 3 tries and fails to emphasize character-driven drama over cheap, jump-scare-intensive thrills.

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