User Score
1.8

Overwhelming dislike- based on 207 Ratings

User score distribution:
  1. Positive: 33 out of 207

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  1. Oct 9, 2011
    1
    Uwe Boll's infamous "Alone in the Dark" is a movie that will be known for centuries as 'one of the crappiest movies in cinema history'. From terrible performances and trash story (do you even call that a story?), it's a movie you will NEVER want to see again. Avoid at ALL COSTS!!!!
  2. Apr 3, 2013
    1
    Absolute garbage. NOTHING in this movie is any good! The only reason I give it a 1 is because Christian Slater in it, and I like him. A shame he wasted his time on this filth!

    Overall:
    I would say, if you see a copy of this anywhere, it is your duty as a film lover to destroy it. This is the anti-movie. It must be purged from the Earth!!!!!!
  3. Sep 15, 2010
    0
    how the hell does uwe boll keep making films??? this is one of the few directors who actually make micheal bay seem good. this movie is nothing even close to the Alone in the dark game . which i played many years ago on the 3DO . the whole movie was just a gaint turd .
  4. Oct 29, 2010
    1
    I don't know what would be better; a world without Uwe Boll or a world with him. The movies he makes are nothing but fodder for professional critics to stretch their comedy writing chops, and I love to read articles on how much they hate his movies and make fun of them. When I first saw Alone in the Dark, I almost couldn't believe what I was watching. It was like my 8 year old nephew was handed a decent sum of money to make the most "super cool action alien movie of the year!" The whole thing is an object lesson on what not to do in a movie, from the directing, special effects, casting, and sound. It does it all, and it does it all badly to the point of wondering if you're being punk'd by Ashton Kutcher. I can safely say that I found nothing to be redeeming in this movie: from Christian Slater's outfit and dialogue, to the fact that Tara Reid is supposed to be a scientist because she puts on glasses to make her "look smart". They might as well have had her attempt an English accent, but then I'm sure the United States would be forced to apologize profusely for that insult to their country and accent. That being said, I actually love to watch this movie, if only for the chance to laugh. Maybe I'm sick, but movies like these make me appreciate the real gems even more so. Much like Pink Flamingos, I'd say to at least see it once...but bring the brain bleach (or the brain and eye bleach if you watch Pink Flamingos). Expand
  5. Jan 15, 2011
    1
    This movie is like made with Uwe Boll's feet; the story has nothing to do with the movie, the cliches are endless and the action scenes makes no sense whatsoever.
    Its embarassing to watch this huge pile of shooting guns and the videogame's story is far better from the movie one, while the movie just l ooks like an action steven seagal film with aliens similar to tremors putted on without
    any logic.Watching a playthrough of the game is way more entertaining than this. Expand
  6. Mar 9, 2011
    0
    This is, without exaggeration, a million times worse than any other movie I've ever seen. That said, it has generated some impressively sarcastic "positive" reviews.
  7. Sep 13, 2011
    0
    this movie is crap. grade a crapage. what i mean by this is that I, unlike the other people that said that this was good, played the original game for the computer, and played the re-make for the xbox 360. (very good console) and found myself transported to a dark and sureal story line with horror, suspence, mystery, and even religous lingo thrown in, and the survival aspect was best ever. this movie on the other hand had little to no suspence, the answer to the mystery was obvious, and the acting........ Is undescribably bad. there is no redeeming qualities in it. the story was nothing like the game, the remake was about the devil rising, and all of it was set in central park new york. the old game was set in a mansion. this one was set in a city. no central park, just a city. Is there anything that i can say that describes how stupid and assonine that is? The answer is no, I can not. And that's just the start of the crap, including the fact that it has the biggest loop hole in the world. So big that the grand canyon is a little crack in the pavement compared to it. At the end of the movie, there is a city that all the residents have been aparently eaten by the monsters. And there are no bodies, or blood. Oh my god. How does that work. If godzilla raged through that city, it would be destroyed. And there might be survivors, but there is no one there, and everything is intact. Great clean up job, guys. I am impressed. It would be like having a house of the dead movie with barely having the house of the dead. Wait, that exists. Okay... It would be like having a resident evil movie with no Chris Redfield, or Jill or wesker. Wait, that exists! What is wrong with movies today! Expand
  8. Sep 27, 2011
    0
    With movies like these, if you can handle then it's either a test of your manhood or just plain stupidity. If you finish it you're either a man or just stupid for having watched it in the first place. Take your pick. It could be both.

    Acting/characters: Well, I don't need to tell you how bad it is because you've heard it a million times before. The characters are very laughable and they
    have no motive for doing what they do at all. They make the stupidest choices without any reason at all. The acting is just as bad as the characters. I normally cut actors a bit of slack because bad acting is usually (not always) 50% a bad screenplay and maybe 25% a bad director who controls all of the emotions and acting choices of the actors. But that still doesn't change the fact that everyone in this movie acts as stupid as their characters are. 0/10

    Plot: This plot is as nonsensical as you get. You're expected to know a lot of things that you are never told. They attach significance to a lot of things without telling the audience why they are important or what happens if things go wrong. Do the bad guys want to take over the world? Do they want to just kill the good guys and just leave it there? Who is behind it and why? Is the main villain we see just some pawn or a host body or is he the mastermind of all of this? Why do a highly trained army of government secret alien defense soldiers never have to reload and can't hit anything? The plot holes are bigger than George Clooney's head when he won Best Supporting Actor (the same year this came out actually). It was just a mess. Plus the ending just added another giant plot hole to everything. Nice going. I looked on 5 or 6 different websites trying to get a decent plot explanation for this film. I found pretty much nothing. I did find this though. It's as close as we're going to get. 0/10

    http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/nostalgia-critic/11343-alone



    Screenplay: This was the worst part. The screenplay of this film made the acting and the plot very bad. There were many many cringe-worthy lines. I expected to laugh at a lot of the 'serious' lines, but they didn't even deserve that. They sounded like they were written by a drunk 8 year old. 0/10

    Likableness: Like I said before, the plot was stupid, the acting was bad, and the screenplay was horrid too. I expected to come in at least laughing at the lines and getting entertainment value that way, but I didn't. Plus the special effects were some of the worst I've seen in a long time. I wouldn't suggest this one (although I don't mind that Irukandji suggested this one to me). It's fun to bash films like this. They certainly deserve it. 0/10

    Final score: 0/40 (H)


    TRIVIA TIME: 1. The lengthy opening text crawl was added after numerous test audience members said they were confused by the plot.

    2. After execs read the green draft of the shooting script, the film got an additional $10 million. Uwe Boll poured the money into special effects.

    3. Every piece of body armor worn by the various extra foot soldiers during major battle scenes is paintball body protection made by JT USA.

    4. Nuclear Blast spend $30,000 on the soundtrack rights to promote their bands.
    Expand
  9. Mar 19, 2012
    0
    I think I could make a better movie with a 240p camera. Terrible in every way. I would never make anyone watch this movie...............................
  10. Apr 13, 2012
    0
    Uwe Boll will always be remembered as one of the most horrific, stupid and pathetic directors of the decade, seriously, try this as an experiment, rent Alone in the Dark, then rent something like Meet the Spartans, or Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, watch Alone in the Dark first, and the others will be much less painful to watch...
  11. May 31, 2012
    0
    I don't even know why I feel compelled to reviews this, it's already been torn to shreds enough, from the looks of it. In short, it's terrible. The games (1-3 and The New Nightmare) were awesome, this movie has nothing to do with them, and it's cheesy and boring to an unimaginable extreme. Stay far away.
  12. Jan 3, 2014
    0
    Completo absurdo, um dos piores filmes que vi em toda minha e com certeza um dos piores já feitos. Um vergonha que filmes como esse sejam produzidos...
  13. Oct 20, 2013
    3
    the truth the only reason I saw this movie was because I wanted to see how bad it was and I must admit that uwe boll has a natural talent for making bad movies that not only has a bad direction with boring dialogue and weak performances to critical sets were seen as seriously false
  14. Mar 24, 2013
    1
    Tara Reid... Ugggg One Of The Worst Movie's I Have Ever Seen!
    Sadly This Could Be A OK Movie The Plot Was Ok.. Some Of The Worst Acting Ever!
  15. Jun 7, 2014
    2
    This movie is really dumb...

    Is not even the good kind of dumb, is just moronic dumb; like one of does movies you see and feel like you are just getting dumber by just watching it... I mean, you have to be really uncreative to ripoff the design of the synomorphs from the alien franchise, why are all the action scenes shoot in the dark? whats the point of recording an action scene if
    your audience is not going to be able to watch it? Is like showing your dad a drawing you made in the dark, how is he going to see it?

    To have in title the word "Alone" the main character is always in company... It's so dumb I eventually ended up laughing at it. If you are looking to laugh out with your friends while having pizza and beer, then this movie is for you...
    Expand
  16. Apr 8, 2013
    0
    As its based on a video game the movie is going to be awful. Since Uwe Boll is the director its going to be awful. The movie is awful. Loud, Matrix-style action scenes, poor acting, a ridiculous plot and a long introductory scroll for the illiterate audience who are the only people ignorant enough to see it (I only watched it for purely scientific purposes).
  17. Jul 2, 2013
    0
    First off, this movie is based off Alone in the Dark: The New Nightmare (2001, Infogames) NOT Alone in the Dark (2008, Atari), however, the fact that it bares the title "Alone in the Dark" should be enough to make any fan of the series to abandon everything. The movie doesn't even try to use the source material, instead going for something that shouldn't even exist. I mean, they went as far as to have a dead person get up again, and even animating bullets missing people WHO SAID BULLET JUST KILLED. What really takes the cake is the non existing storyline, pre-into to acting actors, and a gods awe-full music score. In fact, I'm sure the only reason that Uwe Boll made this movie, was so that he could exploit a loop hole and use it as a tax write off, so that he gets paid a lot of money in compensation. And this isn't the first time he's done this to a video game. Seriously, avoid at all costs, even if those costs are vital organs, loved ones, or having to be wide awake for a root canal, in a truck, in a high speed chase being preformed by Orin Scrivello. Expand
  18. Feb 14, 2014
    0
    The most atrocious, lame, boring, dry, dull, repetitive, badly acted, terribly directed, overwhelmingly awful horror film that I have ever sat through. A film I forced myself to sit through after wanting to turn my head in disgust at this godawful mess of scenes slapped together to be called a movie.
Metascore
9

Overwhelming dislike - based on 25 Critics

Critic score distribution:
  1. Positive: 0 out of 25
  2. Negative: 24 out of 25
  1. 30
    Here is the horror-action genre at its silliest and most uninspired.
  2. That this bit of pustulence is based on a video game of the same name is no surprise. It explains the thin plot, characters and abundant gunplay.
  3. Slater narrates as if reading a restaurant menu. Reid seems to have learned each long sentence in segments, so she wouldn't be overtaxed.