Review this movie
Jun 26, 2012This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. For all the guys who played Silent Hill, this is a masterpiece. For all the guys who didn't It's still a masterpiece. The thing is, the guys who didn't will never get the plot. It's as deep as the game goes.… Expand
Apr 15, 2013Completely contradicts the game. Takes Silent Hill a game about ghost and demons and turns it into a generic witch movie. Based off the first game but uses monsters from the second(all the monsters in Silent Hill have symbolic meaning so using them in a different story contradicts that). This movie is untrue and an insult to the game and is just a unscary boring movie. If anyone's seen theCompletely contradicts the game. Takes Silent Hill a game about ghost and demons and turns it into a generic witch movie. Based off the first game but uses monsters from the second(all the monsters in Silent Hill have symbolic meaning so using them in a different story contradicts that). This movie is untrue and an insult to the game and is just a unscary boring movie. If anyone's seen the Indiana Jones episode of South Park what happens in that episode is the best way to describe this movie.… Expand
Feb 12, 2014This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. 1. Of course, its always a good idea to take your child to a place she
has nightmares about.
2. Of course, you should always make a beeline for it wen a cop stops
you from going to said nightmary place (she could've saved you a hell
of a lot of trouble than u cud imagine, but nooo, you have to save your
child by taking her to spooktown....which you have read about in detail
3. Of course, its a marvelous idea to have a chat with one of the three
witches from Macbeth who looks beyond dead and rotting.
4. Of course, Macwitch has a penchant for quoting inane biblical
5. Of course, bust out the chesty lady cop to appeal to the male
6. Of course, you should put your hand inside an impossibly twisted
rotting corpse. Ooh, nothing can go wrong there. NOT! (Gosh, leave the
dead and their belongings alone. Its bad enough that they are dead)
7. Of course, the husband gets help from the most unhelpful cop in town
(from the way the cop talks, it looks like he loves puzzles and must
moonlight as a puzzle maker.. And a lousy one at that! Or maybe he's
constipated. Yep, that's it...that's why he talks like that.)
8. At this point, its safe to assume that the mother and daughter are
dead what with the father sniffing out mommy's dang perfume and not
Fun fact= Ideas that the producers thought would make this movie
screwy...er..scary- disabled zombies, paint peeling, mutated bugs
9. Of course, the grim reaper (or whoever that guy who has a short self
esteem and carries a ridiculously big sword to compensate)...yeah, of
course, he has a Toblerone for a head.
10. Of course, by all means let the basket case of a lady accompany
you. She won't be irritating at all, its especially endearing to be
preached at (Hey, newsflash ms.nutty, Moses called, he wanted his lingo
11. Of course, I fell asleep. (sigh...rewind)
12. Of course,
being holed up with a bunch of Bible thumping freaks who looks as if
they haven't bathed in over a 100 years is always a great idea (I'd go
with Mr.Tobleronehead. At least, that death will b quick)
13. Of course, undertake a quest as proposed by Lady Creeptastic. She must
mean well and care about you.
14. Whoa... McBusty cop dead? (Right at this point, the male
demographic must've left the theater)
15. Of course, more dreary and boring rusty decor (What is this style
called? Urban evil chic?)
16. They've busted out chesty nurse zombies. Of course, the male
demographic are back.
17. Of course, unoriginal flashback bla bla bla shown on old film reels
(You'd think that the dark forces, with all the power they've got
going, would have better quality film reels for flashbacks)
18. Of course, I fell asleep.....again. (Gee, i wonder why?)
19. Of course, the movie's going downhill, so why not add a bucket more of gruesome to
it. Burning a small girl sounds just about right. 20. Whoa! Busty cop's alive? Of course, she is. I mean who wouldn't be, after being whacked on the head with iron pipes. 21. Of course, she's alive only to be burned in the next shot. (Note to producer- stop yo-yoing, **** and make a decision) 22. God, this movie's laaaaame. Kill me now. 23. Dayyum... Mother got sucker punched. Niiice. Of course, she needed that, what with all the bloody useless running around and putting hands in dead ppl and **** 24. Of course, trying to talk sense into a group of fanatics is always a good idea. Sure, they'll listen to u and change their beliefs. 25. This evil entity likes to peel paint. 26. Of course, kill Lady Creeptastic with an unoriginal rectal cleaving and the others with fence wires. 27. Of course, the mother and daughter were dead. U gave that away in the first part itself, moron.… Expand
Apr 22, 2014The director doesn't know **** about horror, I am afraid. The movie was a disaster & shamed the SH franchise. True horror is not about scaring you but masterfully messing with you - something you can appreciate than being throw waves of monsters and expecting to have a good time. Said very simply: true horror deals with human nature, not the monsters.
Although I did not understand the story, I would have appreciated a great deal less explanation. All through the movie, characters are pausing in order to offer arcane back-stories and historical perspectives and metaphysical insights and occult orientations. They talk and talk and somehow their words do not light up any synapses in my brain.