Online play -- including both co-op and the deathmatches that made Doom such a phenomenon in the first place -- can hardly even be considered "play." The lag is unbearable, the framerate excruciating. Aiming is nearly impossible.

Also worthy of note: the stupid, unforgiving, scripted button-tapping events (think God of War, only terrible). The only reason these do not throw me into a fit of vein-bursting rage is that you can retry them infinitely.

The thread holding Jericho above that pit of legendary awfulness is thin and fraying. Mr. Barker, you're better than this.

Considering the basic concept the series is built on, Full Auto 2: Battlelines has perhaps the most needlessly confusing plot ever put to disc.

The problem is that it plays like Tony Hawk's 1999 debut. Worse yet, it's not even on par with that.

How do you get "Diablo" wrong? It's like screwing up tic-tac-toe or something. But that's just what Monte Cristo's done with Silverfall, an epically crummy action-RPG with gimpy controls and bugs that'd make a flophouse mattress blush.

Wing Island's missions -- set on serene-but-sterile-looking islands -- are often as boring as they are bizarre. Dumping water on fires? Eh, kinda fun. Delivering fruit crates to hard-to-hit drop zones? Sure. I'll try that. Bombing blah-looking rock formations? Uh, someone wake me up when we land.

The fact that this game is fun for exactly 20 minutes, and only in a group of two or more, should keep you from buying this game. In the end, Boogie is light on dancing, light on karaoke -- a jack-of-all-trades, master-of-none moment of fluff.

Chief among Time Ace's tripping points: an autoengaging autopilot with a knack for tossing you into buildings if you wander too far from the preset flight path. Add spotty hit detection into the mix, and you end up dying more from crashing into obstacles than from taking enemy fire.

Even without the technical issues, Shrek would have been average at best. But when an already mediocre game comes complete with the types of problems plaguing this product, it's impossible to recommend it at all.

If the theory of natural selection holds true, The Adventures of Darwin will find its way into the bargain bins of the world in no time flat. And if you have any intelligence in your design, you'll stay far, far away.

Budget buyers, beware: This half-assed rebranding and rethinking of the NFL Street series is one of the limpest sports experiences I've played in years. NFL Tour is shockingly inorganic, severely underdeveloped, and thoroughly limited.

Budget buyers, beware: This half-assed rebranding and rethinking of the NFL Street series is one of the limpest sports experiences I've played in years. NFL Tour is shockingly inorganic, severely underdeveloped, and thoroughly limited.

But the worst part? Beowulf features a minigame that rewards players for not having sex with Grendel's mother, played by a near-nude Angelina Jolie in the movie, for as long as humanly possible. That's just wrong.

The game offers painfully little in the way of options. Most annoying is the complete lack of straight-up deathmatch -- Predator-vs.-Predator -- or an option to play as an alien. Instead, you choose from a handful of environments where two Predators compete to kill the most aliens under a time limit. Yawn.

The core problem with Napoleon Dynamite: The Game is that it totally disregards the humor of the film (and, as such, of the audience it's attempting to reach). The whole joke of Napoleon Dynamite was that Jon Heder's titular character constantly claims to have more skill than he actually possesses. In the game, you have all that skill and more.

The core problem with Napoleon Dynamite: The Game is that it totally disregards the humor of the film (and, as such, of the audience it's attempting to reach). The whole joke of Napoleon Dynamite was that Jon Heder's titular character constantly claims to have more skill than he actually possesses. In the game, you have all that skill and more.

As it is, it feels like a one-night brainstorming session came up with a whole bunch of random ideas thrown in a pot and clumsily stirred. There might be a good game in here somewhere, but it needs to cook a lot longer.

Fails for a few different reasons, but the big one is a simple lack of consistency. A good fighting game is governed by clear, well-defined rules and directed through precise, responsive commands. Chaos doesn't have either.

The looseness of Conflict: Vietnam, from the lack of comfortable and immediate controls to the boring progression of the game, just doesn't cut it. While the idea of squad-driven combat set in the tense, emotionally-charged setting of Vietnam has potential, Conflict: Vietnam falls short in execution.

The amount of recycling involved in the level design here is abominable -- some areas repeat the same pair of linked rooms as many as three times in rapid succession, and the problem gets distinctly worse as the game progresses into its later levels.

Pandering to every college student and aspiring rap artist's deep-seated "Scarface" fantasies, 25 to Life is a 3D action-shooter that not only fails to innovate on any level, but rolls back design and technological advancements to the early PSone era.

Just add impenetrably obtuse missions, ugly models, low visibility, a sluggish camera, and a fish that steers like a truck full of fat kids. Congratulations, Jaws Unleashed, you just killed our (sadistic) inner child.

As I painfully maneuvered my Charlie from room to room, I grew more and more desperate in my attempt to find redeeming qualities in the game.

It earns disdain on its own merits. The videogame of the movie of the book -- it's not a surprise that this ended badly, it's just disappointing.

Uneven production values have wound up creating one of the cleanest and quietest "gritty" games ever. While the fighting environments are rich with lots of detail and natural lighting, they also appear to have janitors on duty 24/7.

As I painfully maneuvered my Charlie from room to room, I grew more and more desperate in my attempt to find redeeming qualities in the game.

The amount of recycling involved in the level design here is abominable -- some areas repeat the same pair of linked rooms as many as three times in rapid succession, and the problem gets distinctly worse as the game progresses into its later levels.

It fails at presenting a compelling racing game, and more to the point, it fails at presenting a compelling Ridge Racer game, with backward graphics and bollixed controls.

The broken controls, derivative enemies, and maddening attack moves remove any ounce of fun. The saving graces are the cut-scenes, but we don't even <I>play</I> that part. So in short, it's at its best when you're not touching the controls, and when a game plays this badly, you don't want to.

With the exclusion of co-op -- what people really want to play -- and the constant hint that a sequel's already on the way, Beast Rider feels like a difficult, drawn-out, $60 tutorial. Why bother?

With the exclusion of co-op -- what people really want to play -- and the constant hint that a sequel's already on the way, Beast Rider feels like a difficult, drawn-out, $60 tutorial. Why bother?

The Transformers formula was meant for videogames. Giant robots destroying cities as the forces of good and evil struggle for supremacy. It's too bad the PSP developers weren't able to parlay that into a semidecent game.

The battle system reeks of incomplete, unfinished ideas.

Some will likely fight the flaws for another chance to terrorize their '70s-era brethren, but if the name "Crypto" doesn't bring to mind a litany of past quips, Furon will simply seem like an out-of-touch, thoroughly unpolished romp through mediocrity.

This sort of do-nothing port is only going to alienate players and further reinforce the stereotype that the genre simply doesn't work on console systems.

Much like Altair himself, Assassin's Creed for the DS is an unlikable mess.

By the time I'd defeated my 10th werewolf, I was already tired of needing to cut or shoot its head off so it didn't regenerate. By the time I defeated my 200th, I just wanted to turn the game off.

By the time I'd defeated my 10th werewolf, I was already tired of needing to cut or shoot its head off so it didn't regenerate. By the time I defeated my 200th, I just wanted to turn the game off.

By the time I'd defeated my 10th werewolf, I was already tired of needing to cut or shoot its head off so it didn't regenerate. By the time I defeated my 200th, I just wanted to turn the game off.

You can play a few pointless sandbox maps that demonstrate the straightjacketed city progression, whether you're in Capua, Venice, Sparta, or Memphis.

Nothing says a simulator can't be fun. I love the idea of plotting out my draft board, targeting free agents, cutting dead weight, and juggling the salary cap. But Head Coach 09 just left me frustrated and angry.

I love the idea of plotting out my draft board, targeting free agents, cutting dead weight, and juggling the salary cap. But Head Coach 09 just left me frustrated and angry.

Ultimate Band embodies what I call the Grinch Effect -- unwitting parents buying terrible games that mimic popular ones, stealing Christmas away their children in the process. Kids, don't let the back of the box fool your parents -- make sure they know that you do, in fact, need instruments to rock.

Sega fails to make a good platformer -- pretty much everything Sonic Unleashed does has been done better in tons of other games.

Playing the same boring minigames over and over again in each stage (sometimes five or six times, without deviation), coupled with simple driving tasks and a lack of significant variation between missions make this a joyless grind with little reward.

While some hardcore dungeon-crawler fans might get some enjoyment out of Valhalla Knights 2, I'd rather skip the grinding and play a game where the combat accentuates my exploration of a rich, engaging world.

Despite all of Wonder World's menu problems, generally terrible visuals, and inane writing (which at times seems pulled directly from some obscure Bulgarian translation), the actual minigames themselves are surprisingly intuitive. If you can take the punishment to unlock them, a few of the minigames are actually fun.

What little tactical challenge commanding these brain-dead battles presents still manages to overwhelm the game's signature whip select system.

Its eminently forgettable title notwithstanding, the significant flaws lie in core mechanics and not the story framework.

But the inadequate drum peripheral and minimal extra content expose the fact that development's been problematic since day one. Konami's always been synonymous with awesome rhythm games, but with Rock Revolution, the rock crown and scepter have officially been passed to a new generation of games.

But decent tech is all for naught when paired with a bland and embarrassingly brief experience like Tony Hawk's Motion, which contains just four settings (two each for skate and snow), each with five total objectives.

The only real laugh in this game comes in the opening introduction (which you can watch in its almost-entirety here). The rest of the game is a plodding, boring mess that that forces you to play through the worst shooter genre clichés, and then asks you to laugh simply because the game's creators self-referentially point out how annoying those tropes are.

Like the "real" Matt Hazard, Eat Lead is best left to fade into obscurity.

The difficulty quickly jumps from simple to insane, before you're equipped to tackle the tougher challenges.

Absolutely nothing about Rise of the Argonauts stands out as special, and just when you think the game's about to take a turn for the better (at least in terms of reworking the Jason and the Argonauts story), its fundamental and technical problems -- including some annoying loading times in the Xbox 360 version -- bring it way back down.

Absolutely nothing about Rise of the Argonauts stands out as special, and just when you think the game's about to take a turn for the better (at least in terms of reworking the Jason and the Argonauts story), its fundamental and technical problems -- including some annoying loading times in the Xbox 360 version -- bring it way back down.

Söldner-X tries to mimic Japanese shooter sensibilities, but in execution, it takes on the trappings of the worst so-called "Euroshmups": stages that don't seem to have had a lot of thought (or maybe too much thought) put into their design, and an art style that's mostly, well, art rather than eye candy to compliment the action.

You'll spend so much time fighting the Wii Remote and accidentally building towers in the wrong places that you might as well just go to a backyard sandbox or actual beach.

Rogue Warrior isn't simply dumbed-down in its final incarnation -- it's just plain dumb.

Rogue Warrior isn't simply dumbed-down in its final incarnation -- it's just plain dumb.

A game that tries so hard to prove that the series is progressing, but ignores fixing the issues that have plagued it for years: poor defense, sloppy animations, and catering to the home run mar any greatness this game was hoping to achieve.

I was initially excited about the prospect of a top-down shooter to play on the go, but my excitement quickly turned to disappointment and frustration. EA tries to stuff too many peripheral gameplay components into The 40th Day, which loses focus of the point of the shoot-em-up genre. Coupled with the extremely poor AI, there just really isn't much to recommend about this game.

All of the game's step-by-step recipes are available in the game, but instead of buying it, I'd recommended taking your money and picking up the actual source, the aforementioned How to Boil Water. It'll has the game's 12 dishes, plus a couple hundred more. Not to mention that you'll be able to appreciate the smell of real bacon coming from your kitchen as opposed to seeing it sizzle on your TV and waiting two minutes to virtually flip it with a remote.

I don't know what it would take to make a game of Spore's scope on the DS, but I know it requires an entirely different approach than the lamentably simplistic Spore Hero Arena.

Its basic design philosophy is one of laziness and glossing over problems rather than really putting out the effort to make a decent game. That's a bitter pill to swallow for a kid who just shelled out 50 bucks of lunch money.

Its basic design philosophy is one of laziness and glossing over problems rather than really putting out the effort to make a decent game. That's a bitter pill to swallow for a kid who just shelled out 50 bucks of lunch money.

Its basic design philosophy is one of laziness and glossing over problems rather than really putting out the effort to make a decent game. That's a bitter pill to swallow for a kid who just shelled out 50 bucks of lunch money.

The survivor mode is like the game itself in a microcosm. It's rote and uninspired, a desultory thoughtless collage of bits and pieces surgically removed from the movies and dropped lifelessly into a dated engine.

The survivor mode is like the game itself in a microcosm. It's rote and uninspired, a desultory thoughtless collage of bits and pieces surgically removed from the movies and dropped lifelessly into a dated engine.

The only real change-up in the whole game is when the Turtles get shiny cybernetic-looking gear when they travel into the future. It's literally wave after wave of enemies through eight stages that serve as mere backdrops. And that wasn't really what was worth remembering from the old days.

At almost $16 on the PlayStation Store it's hard to justify this pack of frustrating challenge levels when you can get a far superior and more balanced game in LocoRoco 2 for just $20. This masochistic traipse through nightmarish levels will probably appeal to some hardcore gamers, but if you've enjoyed LocoRoco in the past, you'll want to hold on to your good memories and just wait for the next chapter.

0 Day is a complicated mess of imbalanced levels, ineffectual A.I., and ghost-town online multiplayer, culminating in no incentive to keep playing.

DBC's trouble goes deeper than simple poor design; there's no vision here, no sense of what the "point" of the game is.

Namco Bandai wisely placed heavy emphasis on the sensory overload graphics, and the reason is clear: if you aren't laughing at the craziness, the game itself might actually drive you mad.

Despite the years of work Realtime Worlds poured into their latest creation, APB still comes off as being woefully underdeveloped, and ultimately unfinished.

And the state of the A.I. is deplorable.

For those looking to relive some of the fun of the movie, avoid this mediocre flight combat game; you'd be a thousand times better off sitting around with your co-workers and seeing who can recite the most lines, or figuring out who can chomp their front teeth the loudest.

A slapdash title like this shouldn't take anyone's time or money.

So much in this game speaks to either a lack of time or pure laziness on the part of the developers.

Reviving Dreamcast games for the HD generation should involve a little more effort than putting out a slapdash port of the original.

If you play the game on 360, there's a Kinect mode that consists of a series of gameplay challenges (hold out against the Death Eaters chief among them), but the implementation is awful.

Reviving Dreamcast games for the HD generation should involve a little more effort than putting out a slapdash port of the original.

Save the money, go outside, and just fight with the air. You'll get the same experience and look just as intelligent.

Unless you're obsessed with all things Sonic, or you simply must own every Kinect title, stay away from Sonic Free Riders.

Mindjack's execution is just ludicrously poor at times.

Mindjack's execution is just ludicrously poor at times.

The difficulty ramps up so much by the game's finale that I'm not convinced it's even possible for a solo player to finish this thing. And even if you could, I'm not sure why you'd want to; Sanctum of Slime has little to offer the die-hard Ghostbusters fan, and even less for the twin-stick shooter crowd.

The difficulty ramps up so much by the game's finale that I'm not convinced it's even possible for a solo player to finish this thing. And even if you could, I'm not sure why you'd want to; Sanctum of Slime has little to offer the die-hard Ghostbusters fan, and even less for the twin-stick shooter crowd.

Perhaps worst of all, the sense of place is gone.

The miserable camera system often zooms in too close to see what you're doing, or makes it impossible to see a necessary location without moving.

The miserable camera system often zooms in too close to see what you're doing, or makes it impossible to see a necessary location without moving.

Brink is unfinished. And that doesn't mean it's full of technical problems. Well, it's got those too. But mostly, it's just an unpolished, poorly executed mess of ideas.

It's hard to shake the feeling that Mercenaries 3D is the slimy result of a Capcom executive meeting titled "What can we get away with this time?"

I understand that the game is meant for a younger audience, but there are quite literally hundreds of other titles out there that provide a far more enjoyable experience.

I understand that the game is meant for a younger audience, but there are quite literally hundreds of other titles out there that provide a far more enjoyable experience.

A budget priced video game is usually associated with a development involving with minimal effort and cost to the publisher. Sometimes there's a sincere effort made to provide gamers with a good deal (read: "Virtua Fighter 4: Evolution"), but Gotham Games and Big Ape's Celebrity Deathmatch doesn't even half-ass an attempt.

It never becomes fun. It looks awful and sounds even worse. It could almost be recommended ironically as a game so bad that it's entertaining or as a basis for some sick drinking game (take a shot every time an enemy gets stuck on a corner), but it's even too bland for that.

No, the problem here is that getting to the naked women is a painstaking chore, and the few seconds of a girl going wild does not make up for the five minutes of inane videos leading up to it.

The dictionary entry will read, "Rengoku ren - go - ku n: 1 A game design flaw in which great effort is expended on concept art but little else. 2 An activity that presents itself as entertainment but is, in fact, a form of torture."

It's being sold now for $20. In a week, when they are selling it for $4.99, it will still be overpriced.

There is no joy to be found within the data contained on this disc. Only crushing disappointment, suffering, and weak shin muscles.

A truly awful experience. Put simply, it's a portable piece of ugliness that lacks any humility or wit. It is singularly unpleasant in the way it handles its subject matter, and lacks the style or panache to carry its inadequacies with any dignity.

There's a decent flying game in Blazing Angels, there really is. It's just buried under so many obtuse design decisions and horribly awkward Wii controls that it's not even worth looking for. On the Xbox, Xbox 360, and PS3 it was a decent experience for WWII flight fans despite a handful of quirks; on the Wii, it simply doesn't work.

The game is an embarrassment to the Gundam name, and raises suspicions that it was rushed for the PS3 launch. Clearly, the series -- and the fans -- deserve better.

And while it's true that every brain training game is probably assisted with a healthy dose of pseudoscience, it's Brain Boost that shows its seams the most. And because of that, Brain Boost feels the most condescending.

Bug Island fails and frustrates so thoroughly throughout its 10-plus-hour playtime that its greatest feat may be fooling someone into finishing it who isn't paid to do so. It's easily the Wii's worst showing yet.

When you start seeing the same character model serve as two different people during an in-game cut-scene, you'll truly know all is lost. There's nothing remotely unique or engaging about Driver '76 (or its lifeless multiplayer) to balance the endless parade of frustrations. Steer clear.

Of all the painful aspects of Dark Messiah, the bulk of the problems lie with the controls. It feels like you're moving through a bowl of thick, hearty pea soup; simply walking through the game is exhausting.

The combat is too difficult for young fans of the books to enjoy, but the adventure lacks the depth that experienced gamers crave. Because of that, it's impossible to recommend this game to anyone.

The best part of Reshef of Destruciton is the three free trading cards that come with the game.

And just in case Super Army War wasn't stripped down enough, there's no battery backup -- just a password system. It's true that portable games don't need to be as full-featured as console titles, but people have e-mailed me Flash games that are deeper than Super Army War (not to mention more fun).

Lacking the excitement, humor, and creativity of the infamous TV show, Celebrity Deathmatch isn't even recommendable as a rental to fans.

No, the problem here is that getting to the naked women is a painstaking chore, and the few seconds of a girl going wild does not make up for the five minutes of inane videos leading up to it.

It's being sold now for $20. In a week, when they are selling it for $4.99, it will still be overpriced.

While your first few moments with Grave Danger might actually fool you into thinking it could be fun -- especially if you're getting some co-op play on -- you'll ultimately be brought back to painful, boring reality.

The visuals aren't just crude, they're abysmal -- plenty of PlayStation 2 games offer graphics that outclass what's on display here. And in terms of pure content, this game offers so unbelievably little -- you can trudge through the whole thing in roughly two hours -- that it's nearly incomprehensible that this sits on the same shelf (with the same asking price, no less) as "Devil May Cry 4."

If throwing cubes of trash at buttons is up your alley, then we've got just the thing: Heavy Iron's game-itization of Pixar's WALL-E is an offal-chucking aficionado's dream come true. What it isn't, though, is much fun at all.

If throwing cubes of trash at buttons is up your alley, then we've got just the thing: Heavy Iron's game-itization of Pixar's WALL-E is an offal-chucking aficionado's dream come true. What it isn't, though, is much fun at all.

WALL-E is a particular sad movie tie-in failure, because Pixar, the company behind the film, is known for projects that appeal to multiple age groups. By contrast, the WALL-E game holds virtually no appeal to anyone.

WALL-E's just a bunch of schlock that shares a marketing department with a much, much better movie.

Worst of all, Ninja Destiny doesn't offer infrastructure play for online battles. All of this, combined with the hollow mechanics and lackluster design, makes it hard for even the most hardcore Naruto fan to appreciate Naruto: Ninja Destiny.

The only reason that Prince Caspian doesn't utterly fail is that it does feature the occasionally interesting puzzle. However, figuring out a clever, well-thought-out solution only made the otherwise forced and repetitive nature of the rest of the game seem that much worse by comparison.

I can still hear the ba-thump ba-thump of the paused game behind me, begging me back for more abuse, and I'm caught in a spiral of disbelief. Nothing can be this awful, yet I find myself straining to look over my shoulder. I don't know how long I can hold out. I am lost, but you may yet save yourselves. Save yourselves from this game.

I can still hear the ba-thump ba-thump of the paused game behind me, begging me back for more abuse, and I'm caught in a spiral of disbelief. Nothing can be this awful, yet I find myself straining to look over my shoulder. I don't know how long I can hold out. I am lost, but you may yet save yourselves. Save yourselves from this game.

Other than the fact that you can wage 10,000-unit battles, don't expect much difference between Stronghold Crusader Extreme and the regular, nonextreme Stronghold Crusader.

If you don't have the resources to do something like Rocky and Bullwinkle justice, don't bother making a game at all.

The best buying advice I could offer is to pick the game up from the bargain bin in a few months, along with copious amounts of liquor (if you're of age), and throw a Target: Terror party.

Everything in the game (art, dialogue, characters, etc.) is barely bargain-bin passable.

As a fighter, Castlevania Judgment employs too many design ideas that are neither well planned nor well executed. It's a strange misstep for the beloved series, one that Konami hopefully learns from.

That each best-of-three contest lasts no longer than perhaps three minutes is the final nail in a coffin that should remain firmly closed.

Thinking about substituting Pong Toss for a Beer Pong table at your next party? Don't. You'll just end up with irritated friends, and you don't want angry drunks hurling Wii Remotes at your television.

It's the game part of this game that stinks, and the rest of it should have just been a DVD.

It's the game part of this game that stinks, and the rest of it should have just been a DVD.

It's the game part of this game that stinks, and the rest of it should have just been a DVD.

And in the process of keeping it real, I have to comment on Forsaken Gods' combat system, which is -- without a doubt -- the worst I've ever encountered in a game.

The DS game doesn't capture any of the magic inherent in Fighting Fantasy's formula. Instead of an adventure packed with mystery and excitement, the series' first videogame provides a dull story and frustrating controls in a generic dungeon crawl wrapper. It's a shame, because I remember enjoying the "Choose Your Own Adventure" style so much as a kid, and I bet that formula could make for a great game.

An unmitigated disaster.

An unmitigated disaster.

Sega Studios San Francisco's final game, Iron Man 2, based on this summer's movie, combines the worst pitfalls of both genres, leaving me with one simple conclusion: Iron Man 2 the videogame is not for anybody.

Sega Studios San Francisco's final game, Iron Man 2, based on this summer's movie, combines the worst pitfalls of both genres, leaving me with one simple conclusion: Iron Man 2 the videogame is not for anybody.

Unless you're a huge Dead Space fan and absolutely can't contain yourself around anything remotely related to that universe, skip out on Dead Space Ignition.

Unless you're a huge Dead Space fan and absolutely can't contain yourself around anything remotely related to that universe, skip out on Dead Space Ignition.

Skate taps into a state of mind. Shaun White is just a succession of awkward obstacles posing as challenges in a game with bad controls and clunky animation.

Skate taps into a state of mind. Shaun White is just a succession of awkward obstacles posing as challenges in a game with bad controls and clunky animation.

NeverDead is a game, and it can be completed. In my opinion, those are the two truths that cushion the space between a D- and an F. Remove those two facts, and you're left with an amateur effort that redefines the boundary between bad game and flat-out punishment.

NeverDead is a game, and it can be completed. In my opinion, those are the two truths that cushion the space between a D- and an F. Remove those two facts, and you're left with an amateur effort that redefines the boundary between bad game and flat-out punishment.

If "Need for Speed Underground" had an inbred cousin (possibly by "Bust-a-Groove"), and that cousin was mutated by exposure to radiation, I'm forced to conclude that Lowrider would be the result.

I cannot forgive the miserable checkpoint system; no matter how long and difficult a particular room is, get hit at the end, and it's back to the very beginning for you.

Rampage: Total Destruction is broken and a perfect example of how not to port a game to the Wii. (And then charge extra for it.)

If Pocket Pool developer Hyper-Devbox were really smart, it would stop beating around the bush and come up with an Official PSP Porn Viewer, with all the bells and whistles you'd expect from iPhoto. Masquerading this nonsense around as a game that people are expected to pay money for when pool halls are cheap, photos of women are free, and good PSP games are plentiful -- well, it's embarrassing for everyone involved.

Broken missions, pathetic animations, a sorry fighting system, and a sorrier button-mashing mode.

If it existed on its own, it would be mediocre, but as it stands it's completely without value. This is less a game to be played than buried in a landfill in the desert.

It arrives looking like the work of someone who understands neither why we play games (to be entertained, not jerked around) nor the culture he's trying to parody.

There's simply nothing redeeming about Acme Arsenal. It's an incredibly poor, woefully unentertaining use of a great license, and an absolute bore to play. It doesn't get nearly enough right to be anywhere close to average, and becomes its own worst enemy with a cavalcade of embarrassing glitches.

There's simply nothing redeeming about Acme Arsenal. It's an incredibly poor, woefully unentertaining use of a great license, and an absolute bore to play. It doesn't get nearly enough right to be anywhere close to average, and becomes its own worst enemy with a cavalcade of embarrassing glitches.

There's simply nothing redeeming about Acme Arsenal. It's an incredibly poor, woefully unentertaining use of a great license, and an absolute bore to play. It doesn't get nearly enough right to be anywhere close to average, and becomes its own worst enemy with a cavalcade of embarrassing glitches.

Just one big, frustrating mess. It looks bad, it sounds worse, and you'll be wishing you were playing almost anything else by the end of the first level.

I wouldn't recommend Turning Point to anyone, under any circumstances...and if that's not the definition of utter failure, I don't know what is.

We Cheer's so unresponsive, in fact, that I spent four hours in championship mode, trying to beat the easiest song -- Hoku's "Perfect Day" -- to no avail. It's a fate I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

It's like the developers didn't even play the games they were blatantly ripping off.

At a glance, SPRay seems like a mediocre outing on a platform already overstuffed with useless titles. But shipping an outright broken game is inexcusable.

It's not obvious they knew just how monumentally moronic the game they created is. That's the key difference between the two titles: Bulletstorm is the funny guy at the party who has a bit too much to drink. DNF is the guy who gets plastered, runs around naked with a lampshade on his head and doesn't understand that everyone is laughing at him, not with him.