L.A. Weekly's Scores

For 3,655 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 46% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 51% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 6.8 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 55
Highest review score: 100 Darwin's Nightmare
Lowest review score: 0 C Me Dance
Score distribution:
3655 movie reviews
  1. Director Shankman has diligently studied the forms and reproduced the moves of the screwball romances he so clearly loves, but he simply hasn't the chops to put together even a decent rip-off of those glittering jewels of the '30s and '40s, which depend on great writing, classy situation comedy and, above all, chemistry.
  2. A pretty miserable time at the movies.
  3. The only time the actors appear to have accelerated their own heartbeats is in two paintball scenes, as well as -- professionals all -- the fart-lighting contest. It's pretty pathetic.
  4. So tedious is Fascination that the plot, the embittered characters and, yes, the sexuality are merely insipid.
  5. The picture is an enormous disappointment... The result is one of the most self-consciously grimy movies on record - it looks as if the negative were developed in a mud bath.
  6. A brutish affair replete with sliced bodies, a diced storyline and enough clanky dialogue to wake the dead.
  7. No one ever turns into a real character, and none of the scenes have either dramatic or comedic resonance.
  8. A movie bloated with character cliches and a bullying score that bludgeons us into whatever emotion composer Marc Shaiman thinks we should be experiencing.
  9. It’s hard to know what’s more depressing -- a senseless remake or the idea of a once-great director doing such shockingly slack work.
  10. Never quite gets up to speed, lurching its way through a glossing, superficial take on street life and teenage sexuality.
  11. Overproduced, psychologically muddled, and burdened with an enchantingly overheated screenplay.
  12. In keeping with the film’s giddy superficiality, what’s revealed is a series of sexy poses passed off as character depth. All the backstabbing, shifting alliances and dark motives are held together by adolescent, innuendo-laden dialogue and thick Sapphic overtones.
  13. The cast, which includes Cloris Leachman as the sisters' mother and Paul Sorvino, Jamey Sheridan and Mark Harmon as their various men, emote like pros, even as they deplete any audience goodwill left over from past triumphs.
  14. Intriguing for a while, then steadily more confusing and finally just incoherent.
  15. It is, however, Tortilla Soup's cultural transposition that feels most phony. Where Lee brings depth and subtle observation to his middle-class ensemble piece, Ripoll has simply added a thin Latino glaze.
  16. Why Crop Circles now, if not to ride the hype of M. Night Shyamalan's "Signs" to some quick cash? The movie’s rambling, slapdash, repetitious nature suggests as much.
  17. What this turkey produces in the way of hang-ups is a transparently phony class conflict.
  18. A sappy love story wherein nary a gun or action sequence is seen after the first 10 minutes.
  19. The execution is actually worse than the premise. Nonstop racial, sexual and cultural stereotypes parade across the screen with little wit or real humor to guide them.
  20. As for anyone else who may experience a sudden need for therapy after sitting through this, you're on your own.
  21. What’s striking about John McKay's feature debut is how much contempt toward his female characters the writer-director manages to pack into 115 minutes.
    • 36 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    The animation, incidentally, is half-a--ed, like they ran out of the $292.96 budget halfway through. Rip-off indeed.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    As numbing and depressing to watch as suits hammering out a film-packaging deal one venal clause at a time.
  22. The movie is a funereally paced downer.
  23. Hyams ("End of Days," "Timecop"), who is his own cinematographer, has no idea how to shoot or compose Xiong's wired choreography.
  24. As bad as the movie is, when it tries to be funny -- a hired killer who sings to his victims, a fat man named Bumpo, and an interminable fight scene choreographed to “La donna è mobile” -- it somehow manages to get several degrees worse.
  25. That we are supposed to find something to admire in this callow crew is insufferable.
    • 15 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    If your child forces you to go to Yu-Gi-Oh!, remember that there's no law against iPods in movie theaters.
  26. Preposterous and tedious, Sonny is spiked with unintentional laughter that, unfortunately, occurs too infrequently to make the film even a guilty pleasure.
  27. The humor stays on one low level throughout, and thus fades fast.

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