ReelViews' Scores

  • Movies
For 3,145 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 65% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 33% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 2.9 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 66
Highest review score: 100 2001: A Space Odyssey
Lowest review score: 0 Bachelorette
Score distribution:
3145 movie reviews
  1. Movies like this usually have something interesting to say about the human condition, but not Nine Lives. It makes an insufferably obvious observation: we live boring lives, shit happens, and we die.
  2. From narrative to character development to staging, every frame of Mistress America drips with artifice. It's a playground for unpleasant, self-absorbed characters - an excursion into the lifestyles of people most of us would prefer to bypass. If there's an antonym for self-awareness, it applies to nearly everyone populating this misfire.
  3. As a satire on the media's infatuation with violence and murderers, Natural Born Killers hits the bullseye. The problem is, this is a one-note movie. It repeatedly hammers home the same point until the audience is bludgeoned into senselessness.
  4. Breakdown is the latest in a seemingly endless traffic jam of thrillers that opens strong but finishes abominably.
  5. This movie works best as a sleep tonic. Somewhere isn't just frustratingly slow-moving; it's inert.
  6. Three adjectives spring to mind when describing Marie Antoinette: odd, irritating, and tedious.
  7. An inferior product. It is not well written, well acted, or well directed.
  8. Regardless of whatever ephemeral entertainment this production may offer to some, it is not by any reasonable definition a good movie. It is badly written, inexpertly directed, poorly acted, erratically paced, and features music of dubious worth.
  9. It doesn't take long for the The Signal's promising beginning to fade into a haze that leaves the viewer exhausted and irritated.
  10. Unimaginative horror movies are a dime a dozen, but overlong, boring, unimaginative horror movies? Those are rare. However, in Split, that’s what writer/director M. Night Shyamalan has provided the early 2017 movie-going populace.
  11. Sluggish. Torpid. Boring. Those three words (and more) can describe The Yellow Handkerchief, a stultifying road trip movie whose inept screenplay is only partially counterbalanced by a trio of nice performances.
  12. The level of humor is sit-com-ish at best and the film's dramatic elements are bland and uninvolving.
  13. It's the most disappointing thing to come from the brothers in years.
  14. One could easily argue that, like many Ed Wood-type bad movies, The Faculty might be headed for the cult classic shelf in the video store. Unfortunately, it's not campy enough, and, worse, it seems to think it's being hip when it's just being dumb.
  15. Louder, flashier, and more hollow than anything else out there.
  16. "Magic Mike" was self-contained, made with no expectation of a second chapter - and they prove unable to surmount it. Too many elements that made the first film an enjoyable experience are missing.
  17. Nothing short of a disaster -– easily one of the worst movies of the year.
  18. Alien 3 is, simply put, a mess. The writers have no idea how to tell a coherent, entertaining story. With the exception of a surprise or two, there isn't much worthwhile here.
  19. An insult to anyone who has tragically and unexpectedly lost a loved-one in a similar manner.
  20. It's the kind of thing that Shakespeare might have written if he had undergone a frontal lobotomy.
  21. Sometimes, even a little gratuitous nudity can't save a movie. This is one of those occasions. Cosmopolis easily trumps "To Rome with Love" as the biggest disappointment of 2012 from an established director.
  22. Very little of what made the written version so enjoyable has been successfully translated to the screen, and what we're left with instead is an overly-long (two hours and thirty-four minutes, to be exact), pedantic thriller.
  23. The follow-up proves not only to be creatively bankrupt but a disappointment on all levels and thereby tarnishes the perception of its predecessor.
  24. This is the kind of tearjerker that will cause audience members to cry, but only because they paid hard-earned money to see it.
  25. Those who don't understand what it means for an actor to "sleepwalk" through a performance need only watch Men in Black III; there's no shortage of examples.
  26. Unfortunately, although there are a few nasty thorns here and there, The First Wives Club is a largely uninspired (and unfunny) comedy that collapses completely in the final fifteen minutes.
  27. A maudlin hack-job.
  28. Code 46 is like "Solaris" without the psychological depth and strong acting. The movie is flat, boring, pointless, and nonsensical.
  29. Tracey Ullman is a bright spot in an otherwise sordid, murky production.
  30. No amount of youthful charisma can alter the fact that, in the light of "Dangerous Liaisons", Cruel Intentions is a feeble and dissatisfying shadow.
  31. This is the sort of movie that gives "chick flicks" a bad name. It's a cross between inept melodrama and a bad sit-com.
  32. The resulting hodgepodge of unfunny, sophomoric humor and PG-13 T&A, frosted by a sheen of appallingly nauseous "drama," makes for such a noxious brew that it's amazing viewers stay in their seats for the entire production.
  33. It's either a failed experiment or a movie that was rushed through production so Allen could fulfill his one project-per-year commitment.
  34. Watching Imagine That, I was beset by a feeling of intense depression. Is this what Eddie Murphy has become?
  35. The only worthwhile portion of Twin Dragons is the climactic action sequence, but, to get to that, it's necessary to endure more than an hour of unfunny physical comedy and excruciating verbal interaction.
  36. This unexceptional and uninteresting story of a self-pitying borderline-personality teenager verges on being unwatchable as a result of McDonald's decision to bombard the audience with extraneous images in lieu of telling the story.
  37. The result is an unappealing mess, made less bearable by uniformly lackluster performances and the cheesy special effects.
  38. A misfire in far too many meaningful aspects, The Book Thief is so bad that it's tough to decide whether it's better used as a sleep aid or watched while under the influence as an object of derision.
  39. This is a vile and reprehensible motion picture.
  40. A shallow, transparent satire/social commentary, Palindromes lives and dies on a gimmick.
  41. I don't often use the words "godawful" and "abomination" to describe a movie, preferring to reserve such terminology for extreme instances when I feel duped and mortally offended. Case in point: Bachelorette.
  42. With its canned, predictable action sequences and mirthless attempts at humor, it displays an ineptitude that is frankly shocking considering the talent involved.
  43. This is film noir for the MTV generation: fast-paced, slick, flashy, gleefully mindless, and hollow to the core.
  44. Horror fans will be so bored by the first 90 minutes that they will have either walked out or fallen into a coma by the time the blood starts flowing.
  45. A horrifically bad romantic comedy that serves as a celebration of entitlement, consumerism, and shallow behavior.
  46. For those looking for something positive, this is the only movie I can recall that features music from both ABBA ("Does Your Mother Know") and Handel ("Zadok the Priest"). Let's hear it for musical diversity!
  47. Labeling The Call as "relentlessly dumb" would be an overestimation of its intelligence. This is as brain-dead as a movie can be and it assumes the audience will have the I.Q. of a rutabaga.
  48. The Brown Bunny is one long, self-indulgent bore topped off with a hard-core porn scene featuring Gallo and co-star Chloë Sevigny.
  49. Humor is subjective, but this movie made me feel as if I had been subjected to something unpleasant.
  50. A slow, meandering misfire of a movie.
  51. A muddle of a film - an overlong bore that either mistakenly thinks it's something more than a humdrum romance or has incorporated a variety of pretentions as window-dressing.
  52. Stay away from Birth not because of what goes on (or doesn't) in a bathtub, but because this is not a very good movie.
  53. A Perfect Murder has inexplicably managed to eliminate almost everything that was worthwhile about "Dial M for Murder," leaving behind the nearly-unwatchable wreckage of a would-be '90s thriller.
  54. Demolition founders and its overt symbolism feels forced instead of organic. The production is uncomfortable and artificial, lacking internal logic and tonal consistency.
  55. Perhaps the strangest thing about 2012 is that the bad parts of the film are among the most enjoyable, because they're so over-the-top ridiculous that it's impossible not to break out laughing.
  56. Even children, who will be enthralled by all the puppies, may have a hard time not fidgeting for protracted portions of the running time.
  57. If there's one thing this motion picture proves, it's that "The Naked Gun 33 1/3" wasn't the final insult from a founding ZAZ (Zucker/Abrams/Zucker) member; this is.
  58. Lockout is painful. Not painful in the way Uwe Boll or "Sex and the City" movies are painful. But painful enough that I kept waiting for Nicolas Cage to show up. Or Katherine Heigl. Or, god forbid, both.
  59. Of course, the problem with Angels & Demons is that to get to the final 40 minutes, it's necessary to endure the first 90, and that would be defined as cruel and unusual punishment.
  60. For a strangely-titled, female-oriented drama about mothers and daughters bonding, try "The Joy Luck Club" and leave Ya-Ya as a phrase uttered by one-year olds who have yet to learn how to talk.
  61. "Mindless" applies, and Book of Secrets is more like a tame, endlessly repetitive amusement park ride than a motion picture.
  62. Devoid of life, intelligence, humor, and anything else that could entertain even the most undemanding viewer, this film is a perfect example of something that should have been shipped to landfills, not multiplexes.
  63. Jennifer's Body mixes, matches, and crosses three popular genres: horror, comedy, and teen angst. Unfortunately, it fails at all of them - and "fails" might be too kind a term.
  64. It is a cinematic abomination -- a source of embarrassment for everyone involved.
  65. This remake replaces suspense with boredom and witty dialogue with lame lines any self-respecting actor should be embarrassed to utter.
  66. Unfortunately, as with too many films being made with the international market in mind, Jack Reacher: Never Go Back is a jumble of overhyped action scenes, trite dialogue, painfully bad “character development”, and awful writing.
  67. Redundant and unnecessary.
  68. A soulless jumble of ineptly assembled cliches and pabulum that plays like a 95-minute commercial for NBA properties.
  69. The movie starts cheating the audience early, and never lets up.
  70. There are bad movies and annoying movies, and this one contains elements of both.
  71. It's a cloying, humorless motion picture whose only assets are the work of Jim Henson's Creature Shop and a couple of good one-liners by a pair of rodents.
  72. Plagued by moralizing so strident and a style so artificial that the story never has a chance to speak to an audience.
  73. Too long and too full of itself to offer more than a few fleeting moments of entertainment. It doesn't take long for tediousness to triumph.
  74. The problem with Hostel Part II is the same flaw that afflicted Hostel: no tension.
  75. Who would have imagined that a movie about sex could be so boring? That's the bottom line when it comes to Fifty Shades of Grey.
  76. A woefully underwritten motion picture that starts out as a dumb comedy before taking an ill-advised detour into mawkish sentimentality. The last 30 minutes of Bruce Almighty is so godawful that it almost sent me screaming from the theater.
  77. It has all the elements one would expect from a "so bad it's good" feature: cheesy dialogue, a script that could have been written by two chimpanzees, acting that would make a high school drama teacher cringe, and lots of tight female bodies poured into tiny bikinis. Despite all of that, however, I found Into the Blue to be a real trial.
  78. A tedious, incoherent bore.
  79. This isn't just typical, unchallenging Hollywood drek -- it's typical, unchallenging Hollywood drek made by people who don't care, for people who don't care.
  80. It's all about eye candy and the quick tease. It's not over fast enough.
  81. This new horror/romance mashup provides just enough flavor of Jane Austen’s classic to tease without satisfying.
  82. It boggles the mind to consider that the fertile writing team of Alec Berg, David Mandel, and Jeff Schaffer, all of whom spent time scripting episodes of "Seinfeld," could turn out something as abysmally unfunny as Eurotrip.
  83. There's nothing worse than a film which mistakenly believes it's the comic event of the year. For no legitimate reason whatsoever, When Nature Calls is full of itself to the point of being offensive.
  84. Dull, uninspired, and redundant.
  85. Chaos Theory stumbles from one contrived circumstance to the next, and there's not a moment in this entire mess that conveys any sort of genuine human emotion or reaction.
  86. This movie is so atrocious I kept waiting for Nick Cage to show up.
  87. Instead of generating a testosterone rush, the fight scenes release tryptophan. Not only are they boring, but they are choreographed in an amateurish fashion.
  88. Calling Delivery Man a "comedy" is a bit of a stretch, because it's rarely funny. Dumb, yes, but not in a way that's worthy of more than a half-hearted chuckle.
  89. A "Jennifer Aniston movie" has become synonymous with "derivative, lackluster mediocrity," and it's a shame. We know she has both talent and charisma but nothing on her recent resume has allowed her to display those qualities. So we're stuck with films that are at best forgettable and at worst painful.
  90. As far as I'm concerned, it's official: Hollywood has lost the art of how to make horror films.
  91. Devil will do little to dispel the growing belief that Shyamalan is a one-trick pony whose horse has keeled over. The laughter during the trailer was sadly prescient; the film is a joke.
  92. There is no truth to the rumor that free frontal lobotomies will be performed at the entrance to all theaters showing Eagle Eye.
  93. Fans of the original will end up doing shot-by-shot comparisons. On every level, The Omen isn't just bad filmmaking, it's bad storytelling.
  94. The only reason any male could have for seeing The Vow is the hope of getting laid afterwards. The only reason any female could have for seeing The Vow is if she views the plots of Harlequin romance novels as the height of modern storytelling.
  95. Watching this movie, I wished I knew how to use dental floss, a paper clip, and a crumpled movie ticket to break the projector.
  96. With a script that waffles between being hilariously absurd and insultingly stupid, and action scenes that won't cause anyone's pulse to skip a beat, Paycheck is less appealing than a lump of coal in a Christmas stocking.
  97. The really disgusting thing about this movie isn't the crude jokes themselves, but how grossly unfunny they all are.
  98. Newell has followed up a respectable adaptation of a Harry Potter novel with an ignominious translation of something more delicate and literate. It's hard to recommend this movie to anyone except perhaps the MST3K crew.
  99. Meet Joe Black has the dubious distinction of being the longest film to date of 1998. It is also one of the most tedious and bombastic.
  100. The worst action movie of the summer. I liked Bad Boys II a little less, but making the comparison is like distinguishing between a cow turd and a horse turd. And that pretty much sums it up nicely.

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