Total Film's Scores

  • Movies
For 1,092 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 60% higher than the average critic
  • 4% same as the average critic
  • 36% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 4.5 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Movie review score: 67
Highest review score: 100 Life Itself
Lowest review score: 20 The Host
Score distribution:
1092 movie reviews
  1. That every jibe lands woefully wide is no surprise, though we’ll give leading lady Ashley Tisdale credit for giving her all to a film that mercifully won’t be around long enough to do any lasting damage to her post-High School Musical career.
  2. Charmless, mirthless and witless, this waste of time is another black mark on Depp’s card, while his co-stars fare little better. Even low expectations won’t help you here.
  3. The Devil may have all the best tunes, but this really is the worst sort of cinematic karaoke.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Most ‘one crazy night’ movies (from After Hours to Superbad) thrive on a sense of escalation, but Stand Up Guys only seems to lower the stakes as it stumbles tediously on.
  4. A-list sad-faces abound in a film where absurd concept is rivalled only by banal execution.
    • 22 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Alas, director Courtney Solomon burns out all the cool potential, leaving us with a witless and unforgivably tame car wreck.
  5. It’s poorly made and in poorer taste.
    • 33 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    There are star names in the cast – Sylvester McCoy, John Hannah, Samantha Barks – but ultimately the film rests on Boyle, who sadly has all the acting nuance of a Speak N’ Spell.
    • 11 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    By the end you will quite possibly hate cats, Spacey, and the ’80s.
  6. The Big Wedding isn’t telling a story so much as selling a lifestyle – one that, rather like Heigl’s morning sickness, makes you want to vomit.
  7. The kids are charmless, the writing is bland, and the embarrassing jokes sound like nails down a blackboard.
    • 27 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Playing For Keeps is awful – and not in a hilarious Ed Wood way.
  8. It’s the same sappy drivel as before.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Steven Spielberg famously retained his childhood sense of wonder. On this evidence, Meyer has maintained a nine-year-old's notion of titillating romance.
    • 16 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    The nurse-monsters look cool - think HR Giger in Ann Summers kit - but the plot and burning fairgrounds are so OTT they dispel any chill factor.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Any comparisons with Chicken Run are rendered poultry by half-baked gags. Even tykes will tell it to get stuffed.
  9. Quite why A-listers Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman and Emma Stone (among others) aligned themselves with this excruciatingly moronic compilation of shorts is anybody's guess.
  10. “I will search for you through 1,000 worlds and 10,000 lifetimes!” Reeves promises his beloved. Anyone who sits all the way through this glossy folly will know exactly how that feels.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 20 Critic Score
    Sadly, this leap onto the stereoscopic bandwagon marks a new low for the franchise, as far away in quality from the '74 original as it is in years.

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