For 545 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 41% higher than the average critic
  • 5% same as the average critic
  • 54% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 10.3 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Simon Abrams' Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 54
Highest review score: 100 The Wandering Soap Opera
Lowest review score: 0 Zookeeper
Score distribution:
545 movie reviews
    • 41 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The bad guy likes opera in the mostly forgettable heist/hostage thriller The Doorman, a movie that’s well-versed in clichés and basically watchable, but never really good.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    In this context, Farnworth’s appropriately broad performance is exceptional. She doesn’t have much dialogue that’s worthy of her playful, all-in line readings, but Farnworth deserves all due praise.
    • 26 Metascore
    • 25 Simon Abrams
    Based solely on its own merits, Shortcut is both an amateurish production and a mindless genre exercise.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Thankfully, there’s enough affection and charm in the movie’s first half to keep Teenage Badass running on fumes most of the way home.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Spiral is underwhelming since the movie’s terrors are simultaneously too vague and too familiar to be disturbing.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Children of the Sea is consequently yet another animated fantasy based on hackneyed tropes, like sprite-like martyrs, the guiding hands of fate, and vague nostalgia for a pre-technological past.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    A general lack of urgency are the main things holding Get Duked! back from being as good as it is promising.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 25 Simon Abrams
    Emperor is lousy in the same way that many other mediocre slave narratives are: it re-presents a dark period in American history without being inspired or insightful enough to be worth your curiosity or emotional investment.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Thankfully, Jodo’s latest is also way too weird to be hagiographic. It’s indulgent, absurd, frustrating, and more than a little gross. It’s also idiosyncratic and funny enough, and in ways that Jodo’s fans will probably love.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    There’s some appreciable serenity and a lot of personal grief on display in Out Stealing Horses, but it’s only visible in fits and starts.
    • 72 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    It’s nice to see that the first horror movie to specifically address our present hellish circumstances is as unpretentious and tidy as it is.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 0 Simon Abrams
    If Retaliation were a friend, you’d eventually avoid them.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 25 Simon Abrams
    There aren’t many surprises here, because the bread crumbs that lead to the movie’s big finish are plentiful and very stale. Seriously, the plot twists in this movie are so obvious and unappetizing that you couldn’t miss them if you tried.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    A relentless, but emotionally well-balanced character study of Hikari (Keita Ninomiya) and his bandmates as they receive a series of transformative reality checks, and also perform post-millennial garage rock that sounds like a cross between post-shoegaze emo rock and video-game-style chiptunes.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    I’m still shocked that Followed is as funny as it is given that Mike is as obnoxious as you might expect given his very online, anything-for-the-lulz persona. He’s a cartoonishly loud, entitled millennial who never stops reminding us that he only cares about the sound of his own voice. He’s also sometimes unintentionally hysterical?
    • tbd Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    There’s something eerie, and sometimes even dreadful at the heart of The Soul Collector, a new South African horror movie about the damage done by hungry ghosts and their ignorant descendants. Mostly because The Soul Collector often suggests more than its streamlined plot and mythology can express.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    An exhausting, and mostly frustrating display of emotional scab-picking.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Villain is the kind of stiflingly reverent genre picture that is so beholden to its main characters’ pity-me worldview that its predictably downbeat ending feels like the kind of hero worship that you often find in either a cloying biopic or a hidebound true crime adaptation.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    That kind of gallow’s humor defines the surface tone of Arkansas, which often feels like a riff on “Breaking Bad,” only now it’s more about how sad it is to be poor white trash.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Deerskin isn’t weird enough to be great, mostly because Dupieux (“Rubber, “Reality”) is a little too precious when it comes to pacing, characterizations, humor, etc.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Unlike “Stranger Things,” The Wretched is a little too cute about teen angst, and not light enough on its feet to make you want to root for its ostensibly typical adolescent.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    1BR
    Everything in 1BR is over-exposed, often literally thanks to the movie’s basic camera set-ups and general emphasis on naturally and/or harshly front-lit close-ups, or medium shots of brown stucco walls.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    The gory, but weirdly blasé Russian black comedy Why Don’t You Just Die! feels like a gross exercise in style that’s also a passable tribute to Jim Thompson’s bleakly hilarious crime novels, and a brain-dead critique of post-Soviet consumerism.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    So while Clover may not be original, it is pretty watchable.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 25 Simon Abrams
    Vivarium isn’t a fun watch, and not just because it’s generally claustrophobic and insistently bleak.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 38 Simon Abrams
    Pegg and Temple’s responsive, well-attuned performances are actually the most frustrating things about Lost Transmissions since they’re good enough to make you want to care, even when their characters don’t seem to be worth caring about.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Almost everything that’s enjoyable about Escape From Pretoria is a variation on stuff you’ve probably seen in superior prison movies, though Radcliffe’s haunted performance is exceptionally compelling.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    There’s not much to Porumboiu’s latest beyond a surplus of plot twists and double crosses.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 60 Simon Abrams
    Established “My Hero Academia” fans will probably enjoy Class 1-A’s typically endearing group dynamic, even if none of the jokes in the movie are that great. And their big fight with Nine is genuinely well-staged and climactic, thanks to some impressive computer graphics and director Kenji Nagasaki’s thoughtful staging and choreography.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Greed is never the sum of its best parts since other actors — especially Jamie Blackley, who, playing young McCreadie in a series of flashbacks, is fine but relatively disappointing — can’t pull off the movie’s delicate balance of broad humor and po-faced drama.

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