The music is as grotesquely over-produced as its lyrics are undercooked, with glossy drum rolls and naff scratching segments fighting for attention on the gruesome battlefield.

Angels & Airwaves labour under the illusion that "mature" equals "worthwhile;" and that means long, directionless songs swathed in echo pedals and factory-set keyboards.

'Ultra Payloaded' is largely sub-U2.

What follows is the sound of a band trying and failing to forge a new identity - boy-band balladry, U2-style stadium rock and Metallica-esque melodic crunch are all attempted with predictably patchy results.

'The Boy With No Name' is everything you'd expect from a new Travis album and less.

Their songs are either shitty soft-rock or worse, wink-nudge pastiches like the new-wavey 'Someone To Love'.

Vile, goth-jock pop with all the wit and nuance of a urine-soaked sock.

This stinks of trying too hard.

She has talent to burn, but rather than challenge herself, Stone has chosen to throw herself on a multi-million dollar bullet train to the centre of mediocrity.

'Pocket Symphony' sure does drift over you like a duvet of mood-stabilising drugs.

Sparse, directionless and half-formed, Trans AM's eighth LP is nowhere near the radical transformation its title suggests.

The only person this record would ever appeal to is the man who made it--Jack Black. [11 Nov 2006, p.43]

Excruciating fret wankery... appalling metal funk... and Chris Cornell 'singing' like a castrated gibbon throughout. [2 Sep 2006, p.21]

It can indeed be shunted into the drawer marked "I can't believe I used to like this band." [17 Jun 2006, p.39]

Like a scented Lush bath-bomb of mediocrity. [27 May 2006, p.31]

At its best, this is the sound of Captain Tofuheart; at worst -- on 'Elegy' -- it is literally an out-of-tune dirge. [29 Apr 2006, p.39]

This latest effort sees her turn indistinguishable. [1 Apr 2006, p.43]

For a genre that once sounded astonishingly futuristic, it is quite remarkable how tired and old house sounds now.

There's now something a bit crumbly, a bit rattly about E&TB. [17 Sep 2005, p.58]

[He] returns with exactly the same sound he's been torturing us with for years. [9 Jul 2005, p.58]

You'll find nothing more despicable this year. [17 Sep 2005, p.58]

More over-produced introspection. [6 Aug 2005, p.56]

In the end, this can't even make you feel angry; just desperately sad. [16 Jul 2005, p.50]

Talk about a fall from grace. [4 Jun 2005, p.58]

About as funny as pouring weedkiller on your genitals and then setting fire to them. [7 May 2005, p.66]

So listener-unfriendly that it's almost amusing. [16 Apr 2005, p.51]

'Mimi' manages the unique trick of being self-indulgent without actually ever sounding much like Mariah. [16 Apr 2005, p.51]

Ineffectual hippy grumblings that will make you want to sleep. [4 Jun 2005, p.58]